This, Itachi told himself, was hell in it's most horrible form.

"Itachi! TABLE FOUR!" his boss, Josh, bitched at him. Itachi sighed irritatedly, swearing under his breath when he saw that it was a table of women age eighteen to twenty-four. He had only worked at this God damned diner for two weeks, and he was stuck waiting for all the crowded or female tables. It was ridiculous, really, because Itachi knew that his attitude towards the customers absolutely sucked. He was in the worst mood ever. He hadn't had sex for four weeks because, for some mysterious reason, he denied all the offers he got from customers at work. Then, of course, he would go home and mentally punch himself in the face over and over while trying to not stare at Sakura while she kicked his brother's ass in Mortal Combat, something only she seemed to be capable of. On the brighter side, however, Sakura had gotten used to his attitude, just like he had Sasuke's, and in turn, her attitude had gone back to what Sasuke called 'normal'.

Itachi deemed it anything but normal.

The woman had no off switch. She came into the house at six o'clock in the morning, showered and dressed for hospital work. She cooked a fantastic breakfast for the boys everyday, left it in the oven to keep it warm, and then kicked Sasuke's ass out of bed so he wouldn't miss his morning classes. She changed the towels before Itachi ever even woke up. She cleaned the dishes that she used and then she was out the door just as Itachi woke up and slowly realized that she was already out of the house and that, no, there was no way he was just having an X rated dream about a girl with a name beginning with the letter 'S'.

By five o'clock, she was back at his house, dressed for her night job and running around the house vacuuming, cleaning, doing laundry, drinking green tea, blasting music with her Ipod, dancing around, and cooking dinner, all at the same time. By six she was out of the house, catching the bus downtown. She'd be back in the house by ten o'clock smelling like strawberry lotion and rose oil from her job. When she got back, she made herself a cup of caffeine-free tea, rice or pasta, and some form of meat or tofu. It was about the only time he saw her eat a healthy and hearty meal during her seemingly twenty-hour day. Then, even as she ate, she'd fine something to do. She'd do more laundry, fix a pair of jeans or a shirt that he or Sasuke had decimated, play video games, watch something on the TV. Her energy could have been seen as coming from nowhere if one didn't know that she ate enough sugar and fat to keep her energized for a lifetime.

Itachi sighed, shaking the thoughts out of his head. Four weeks. Barely a month, and he was obsessed. It was becoming torture to be up at night watching TV and have her waltz through the living room, smelling like she did. Why Sasuke hadn't banged her, Itachi didn't know. He thought of his youngest brother as one of the stupidest men alive to not see what he had waving in front of his face. Admittedly, he had to be thankful for his brother's stupidity. It gave him more of a chance.

Whoa. Hold up. What the fuck did his mind just say?

Admittedly, he had to be thankful for his brother's stupidity. It gave him more of a -

Damn he needed to get laid.

"Itachi! Table Four!"

Itachi sighed, shaking his head again and messing up his abnormally short hair before he sauntered over to the table, annoyed and flustered.

"Hey, Itachi!" Sakura grinned, looking up at him. He swore fluently under his breath before smirking.

"Sakura," he replied. He hoped his voice was monotonous. She sent him a smile that sent his heart into cardiac arrest. In his mind's eye, he pictured himself punching himself repeatedly in the gut, then kicking him to the ground and kicking him in the ribs repeatedly, never stopping once to show mercy or sympathy. "What can I get you?"

"In bed. Soon," Sakura's friend suddenly spoke up. Itachi looked over at her. She had long blond hair, blue eyes and a sexy smile. It did nothing.

God fucking Damnit, he was screwed.

"Ino!" Sakura gasped, blushing. Ino winked at him.

"Oh lighten up, Sakura. A little flirtatious dialogue never hurt anyone."

"That was very direct fuck-buddy talk, not flirtatious dialogue. I doubt you even know what the word 'dialogue' means!" Sakura shot back. Itachi raised his eyebrows, looking at Ino for her response. Ino gasped.

"I do to! It means. Um...! You bitch!"

"Whore."

"Hag."

"Hobag," Sakura said, sticking out her tongue. It was only at this point in time that Itachi actually realized that they didn't mean what they were saying. Ino giggled and Itachi silently wondered if all girls did this or if he just almost-lived with some freak of nature. The girls shared a good laughing fit after seeing Itachi's clueless and somewhat scared face.

"Anyway, I'll take a hamburger and french fries," Sakura said, handing Itachi her menu. His fingers slipped over hers on accident and he inwardly swore for the millionth time that day. What he wouldn't give to have those fingers all over him.

"Caesar salad," Ino said, giving him another flirty wink while handing him her own menu, her number written on the back. Itachi smirked back, trying desperately to ignore the fact that five weeks ago he would have dragged her out of the diner on sight. Now he wasn't interested. He walked away, vowing to get laid by some one other than Sakura before he went crazy.

--

"He's so into you," Ino declared the minute Itachi was three yards from the table. Sakura raised her eyebrow, not buying it.

"Really?" she asked sarcastically, taking a sip of her ice tea. Ino rolled her beryl eyes.

"Yes, really. I totally just hit on him with no shame and he couldn't take his eyes off you, sweetheart," Ino explained. Sakura scoffed and shone her nails on her scrubs. Ino sighed and continued, determined to get Sakura to realize just how good she had it. "Seriously. Think about this. You live with two heart-breaking-ly delicious guys, and the older one looks at you like he could dip you in chocolate and lick it off inch by inch and love every freaking minute of it more than that pervert Hatake would."

Sakura cringed. Just thinking of the perverted doctor [who also happened to be her mentor during her first few months at work] made her want to puke, especially not that she had an image of him attempting to lick her. She banked the thought aside before scoffing.

"He doesn't look at me like that!" she retorted. Ino scoffed right back in her face.

"And when he doesn't look at you like that, he looks at you like he's a lost puppy. It's almost been a month, Sakura. Have you even tried anything?"

"No!" Sakura suddenly gasp, offended somehow. "I cook and clean and everything for them. But I'm not making the same mistake twice. I loved for three years and I got nothing from it. He didn't even love me back. I've been over him for what you can barely call a year, and you expect me to just hit on his older brother, just like that?" Sakura said, upset.

Ino sighed. She knew how hard her friend had fallen for that raven-haired bastard back in high school when he first ran away from his family. Sakura had taken him in, even though her mother hated him. Sakura dealt with an abusive mother because of him. She'd taken care of him for almost six years now, and now she was taking care of his smoking hot brother, too.

Ino had yet to hear if either one of them ever said thank you, which only made her protective side get the best of her, letting Sakura win the argument at hand.

"Look, I'm sorry, Sakura. I know how tough it was for you. Remember, I was there, so don't bitch at me and say I wouldn't," Ino warned when Sakura opened her mouth. It was quickly closed again. "I just want you to be happy. You haven't dated in forever. I was just hoping you'd find a guy to fool around with," Ino explained, a master plan quickly forming in her head on the spot. "And Itachi's the perfect guy to give you back all the confidence you had before you met Sasuke. You don't have to love the guy, Sak, but I mean, who else are you going to fool around with? Hatake, for Christ's sake?"

Sakura knew Ino had a point, if not many. Fooling around with him didn't require love or affection. If Sakura knew anything about Uchiha men, 'love' was not in their vocabulary. Sakura glanced at Itachi, who was looking at her with eyes that could have melted iron. Okay, so maybe he did send a few signals that he wanted her. It was nothing that should have surprised her. After loving Sasuke for so long, and seeing him every day, not able to get over him entirely, her confidence had taken an exit, stage left. Sakura realized that she'd been staring and shook her head before she sent him a smirk and turned away.

"You have a good point," Sakura murmured, smiling slightly. Ino visibly brightened.

"Good! Because I have a plan on how to get him even hotter for you. You're skipping work tonight and coming with me."

She didn't leave any room for Sakura to argue.