Chapter 11

Robin smiled softly as he entered Liand'r's room. Starfire had finally given in to sleep. She was seated in a chair that she had pulled over beside their daughter's isolette, her crossed arms atop the plastic box serving as her pillow. His smile dimmed as she muttered in her sleep.

"X'Hal, ca naf treva ne shama, pe oriel shu."

Robin swallowed the lump in his throat at hearing her pleading with her goddess not to take their daughter. 'Well, at least I can make her more comfortable,' he thought to himself. He was now grateful that the room Liand'r was in was set up like the maternity ward rooms. Over by the room's window was a built-in couch that Robin knew from experience could be used to sleep on. This was in addition to the standard-sized hospital bed that the isolette was at the foot of. He turned down the covers on the bed, then stepped over and ducked his head under Starfire's right arm, his left going around her shoulders. His right arm slipped in behind her knees, and when he straightened up, he lifted her from the chair. He realized that his hopes of not waking her were shattered as she put her other arm around his neck and snuggled in against his chest and shoulder. He paused for a moment, ensuring his balance, and simply enjoying being this close to Starfire again after almost a month. The last five days didn't really count, as they were both far too worried about Liand'r to do much snuggling. He gave a sardonic snort as he automatically thought of what Bruce would say. With the way he had been feeling over the last three weeks, he almost agreed with the Dark Knight's way of thinking. 'No, I won't be like that,' he thought to himself. 'Having these feelings is what keeps me human, keeps me who I am.' He was shaken from his thoughts as Starfire gave a throaty sigh.

"Greetings, my husband," she said sleepily. "What is it you are planning on doing?"

Robin felt her giggle as he inhaled sharply at her nuzzling his neck. "I'm putting you to bed, and you're going to go back to sleep."

"As you wish, master of my heart."

Robin smiled again as she kissed his cheek as he set her down in the bed. When he straightened up, he thought about getting a washcloth and wiping her face when he saw the streaks left by the tears she had cried. Deciding that doing so would possibly keep her awake, he drew the covers up over her, then sat in the chair. He was silent for a while, giving Starfire time to go back to sleep, his gaze fixed on Liand'r. Hearing her steady breathing, he relaxed slightly, his hand resting on top of the isolette. "I swear to you, Liand'r, I will do everything in my power to keep you alive," he said softly. "I give you my word of honor."

Robin didn't see that Starfire was awake, her eyes barely open, nor did he see the look of sadness cross her face at his promise to Liand'r, as his voice cracked at the end. She was surprised to hear him singing the Tamaranean lullaby she taught him very softly.

Kinecha ca naf zinara

he shapa vat neru kevara

tro loneva zelo shu vaya vard he zar

co shu vesh rosh che kom vosh a che xteva du shar

Young one do not cry

your parents are here nearby

their love for you will guard your way

as you pass through the black night to the light of day.

Starfire could again feel Robin's helplessness and pain at being unable to help their daughter, and she sighed softly as she felt him slowly give in to sleep. Knowing that he was finally getting some rest, she let herself drift off into slumber.

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The sounding of the monitor alarms jolted both of then from their sleep. Robin stood and went over to Starfire as Lyta, Vern'a, and Galfore came in. There was a tense few moments, then they all breathed a sigh of relief as the heart monitor started beeping again, and the respirator shut back off.

"Doctor?" Robin called as Lyta studied the monitors and checked Liand'r's chart. He glanced over at Starfire as she put her hand on his shoulder, and he saw the nervousness on her face. "Doctor Beckthold?" he called a little louder, interrupting the conversation between the physician and Vern'a.

"Right," Lyta sighed as she turned towards the two of them. "From what pattern Liand'r has been showing, the next time she has an episode should be the last. Either she'll come out of it, or. . ."

"What chances do you give her, Healer Beckthold?"

Lyta looked over at Liand'r as a nurse removed the respirator tube. She felt her own hopes droop as the infant gave only the barest whimper. "In all honesty, Starfire, I really can't say. She's very weak, and could go either way."

"And she will do so on her own, as you already know, Koriand'r," Vern'a said.

"Wait a minute," Robin said. "If you're disconnecting the respirator. . ."

"It doesn't change her chances, Robin," Lyta said, then dropped her gaze. "It's in keeping with the DNR we now have on file for her."

"DNR? What's that?"

"It stands for Do Not Resuscitate," Lyta said softly. "It's a form filed with the hospital that prevents us from taking actions to revive a patient who has either stopped breathing or who's heart has stopped."

"It was necessary, my husband," Starfire said softly. "To ensure that Tamaranean traditions are maintained."

"Liand'r must pass this last. . .episode, as Healer Beckthold calls it, without any outside help."

Robin gaped at Vern'a as if she had gone insane. "You mean to tell me that I was locked out of my daughter's life for a month because Starfire thought I was a threat to her life, and now you're telling me that the next time her heart stops and she stops breathing, you're going to do nothing, and let her die?!"

"This is the way it has been done for generations on Tamaran, Rob'n," Galfore said.

"Whether the Princess lives or dies is. . ." Verna said then paused as she tried to think of the right words. "Che gala've du X'Hal."

"Gala've du. . ." Robin muttered, then his eyes widened as he hit on the translation. "The will of. . .no, I won't accept that, not for my daughter's life. I gave Liand'r my word that I would do whatever I could to keep her alive, and I intend to keep that promise."

"I was afraid you would take this position," Galfore said sadly. "If you cannot abide by our traditions, you will be removed from this room."

Robin was surprised when Starfire placed herself between him and her old k'norfka. "No, Galfore. That I will not allow," she said, then looked over as Liand'r was transferred from the isolette to a regular layette. "In the past I have let you keep Robin and I separated. I will not allow you to keep him from our daughter. I have done enough of that on my own. He is my husband and Liand'r's father; his place is here."

"Do I need to remind you of our traditions, Koriand'r?" Galfore asked.

Robin couldn't see Starfire's face, but the tone of her voice told him that her eyes were probably glowing slightly. "Need I remind you, Keh'shima Galfore, that I am Empress, and of the Royal Family?" There was silence for a few moments, then Galfore bowed slightly to her.

"My apologies, my Lady. So you will stand by him then?"

"He is my husband, Galfore, and the father of my child. For both those reasons his place is here, by our sides," Starfire said. "I will take responsibility for him and his actions."

"I understand, my Lady, and know that you will do what must be done."

"I am pleased to see we understand each other," Starfire said. "Leave us," she went on. "I wish some time alone with my husband and daughter."

Robin saw that Galfore either wanted to stay, or continue the conversation with Starfire, but a life time in service to the Royal Family, Starfire's family, took precedence and he obeyed her command. 'And a command it was,' Robin thought. Her tone of voice left no question that that was exactly what it was.'

Galfore gave Starfire a stiff bow. "As you wish, my Lady."

Robin raised an eyebrow at the half sigh half angry growl Starfire gave as she tuned from the now closed door to face him. He didn't catch all she said under her breath, but the word bothara he did catch. "What's he being stubborn about, Star?" he asked, as he knew the bothara was a Tamaranean animal noted for it's thick hide and skull.

"He knows that I am aware of our customs concerning this last day of Liand'r's Omshe. He is equally aware that I do not like what must be done."

Robin took his gloves off and gently stroked Liand'r's cheek with the back of his hand. "About that," he said. "My trying to save her would violate those customs, wouldn't it?" He sighed softly when Starfire nodded. "Star, I'm not going to lie to you. If her heart stops or she stops breathing, I'm going to try to save her."

Starfire nodded, and Robin could see the sadness in her eyes. "I know, my love, but that cannot be allowed. Liand'r's life or death must be by the will of X'Hal; if you try to interfere you will be prevented."

"By you?"

"If necessary, yes," Starfire said softly. "Robin, I married you according to Earth custom out of my respect for you and your beliefs; do you not feel the same for me?"

"Star, it isn't that simple. If you didn't marry me according to Earth custom, no one would have died. What would happen if I was able to keep her alive?"

"It would be as if she had died and stayed that way. She would be dead to all Tamaraneans," she said sadly. "Including me," she added, then looked up at Robin's face. "That would mean that I would have to leave Earth, you, and Liand'r. I would not be able to remain here and not be able to acknowledge my daughter's existence. Why can you not accept this?"

"Star, ten years ago I stood on a platform, almost a hundred feet in the air and watched as my parents fell to their death. Before Bruce was notified that he could take me in, several people tried to comfort me by saying that my parent's death was the will of God, that I should accept that and move on. Star, my parents died because Tony Zuco tampered with the main support guys for the trapeze. To be honest, I don't believe God had anything to do with his actions." He paused for a moment, and walked over to the window. He rested his hands on the sill and his forehead against the cool glass. "The more people told me that, the more it bothered me. Back then I thought they were trying to excuse Zuco's actions, and I wanted him to pay for killing my parents."

"But, Robin, do you not believe that our daughter will survive, without your help?"

Robin turned and found that Starfire had come up behind him. He placed his hands on her shoulders. "I honestly don't know, Kori, and I'm not willing to take that chance. There was nothing I could do to save my parents, but if no one else will act, I will do what I can to try to save my daughter's life. Starfire, what if my being here, and knowing how to revive Liand'r is part of X'Hal's plan? If it's X'Hal's will that our daughter is to die, then nothing I would do would make a difference."

"I do not know. I do not believe that has been proposed before, but the fact remains that according to Tamaranean custom, no one is allowed to try to revive the infant at their last phase of Omshe. This will extend to our daughter as well. I am sorry, my love, but I see no other choice, although I will consider your question."

"It looks like we both have a choice to make."

"Yes, and I will leave you the privacy you need to make yours, as I will make mine."

Robin's hand on her arm stopped her from leaving. "No, Kori, I'll go. Liand'r is more used to your presence than mine. It'll be better if you're here with her."

Robin was slightly surprised when Starfire drew him into a hug. "Know this, my husband, like you, I do not wish for our daughter to die."

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"You look like someone who could use someone to talk to," Blackfire said as Robin came out of the room.

Robin looked over at her as she fell in beside him as he walked down the hall. "Is it so crazy that I want my daughter to live, Koma? I mean, I understand why the hospital staff won't do anything. With Starfire filing that DNR form, they don't have a choice, but Galfore and everyone else acts like they don't want Liand'r to live."

Blackfire sighed softly. "No, Robin, it's not like they don't want her to live, but we simply believe that she must do it without outside help. Listen, I know this is hard to understand, but it's simply the way it's been done for as long as our history has been recorded."

They entered a small room where a couple of snack machines were, along with a coffee pot. Robin took one of the styrofoam cups and filled it with the dark liquid. "But this isn't Tamaran, and Liand'r isn't a full-blooded Tamaranean."

"I know, Robin, but she is of the Royal Family. The few times that custom will dictate things concerning her must be above reproach. For her, there will be no exceptions, either in her training, when she goes through transformation, or any other aspect of her life."

"Great."

"Hey, don't look so glum," Blackfire said with a chuckle. "It'll be twice as bad for me if Kor'mel and I ever have kids. We're both royalty." She watched as he drained the cup and refilled it. 'He must be practically living on that stuff, which explains how he's still going after almost a week with only about three hours sleep.'

"Well I've made up my mind, so I'd better get back in there," Robin said and walked away, heading for Liand'r's room.

"They both have difficult decisions to make, do they not?" Shel'b asked as she walked over.

"If it were only that simple, Commander," Blackfire said, also watching Robin walk down the hall. "Neither on of them actually has a choice. That's the real problem, and I hope it doesn't destroy them."

"With what Koriand'r must do, and Rob'n's past, it might just do that," Shel'b said softly.

"Care to explain that, Commander?" Blackfire asked, turning toward her.

Shel'b swallowed nervously. "Jemara, I am sorry, but I cannot. As a member for both of their personal guards, I gave them an oath that I would reveal none of their secrets," she said. "I also gave Rob'n an oath of silence on this subject in particular. All I can tell you is that there is an event in Rob'n's past that will compel him, most strongly, to try to aid Liand'r."

"Shel'b, you have been around him more than I have, and know him better," Blackfire said. "How will he react if Starfire stops him?"

Shel'b looked toward the door to Liand'r's room, both her concern and sadness clearly evident on her face, and in her voice. "If Liand'r does not survive, Rob'n will take Koriand'r's preventing him from trying to save her as the deepest of betrayals. Especially with recent events. That is why Chr's and I will be there. We will stay near Rob'n and do what we can to stop him, hopefully keeping Koriand'r out of it."

Blackfire chuckled softly, drawing a questioning look from Shel'b. "Warriors at their best," Blackfire said. "Protecting the members of the Royal Family, even from themselves and each other."

"This is more than my duty as a warrior, Komand'r," Shel'b said stiffly. "They are both my friends. There is not much I would not do to prevent them from any pain, no matter the source."

"Easy, Shel'b, I meant no offense," Blackfire soothed. "In fact, I meant that as a compliment, and I thank you for your dedication to my sister and her husband. I only wish that others would show the same dedication."

"Jemara. . . I. . .apologize for my outburst."

"At ease, Shel'b," Blackfire said, trying to ease the redhead's embarrassment. "You are still a member of Kori's personal guard, right?" she asked and Shel'b nodded. "Then that makes you as close as family. Providing we are alone, or with only Robin and my sister, you may speak freely, and dispense with my title."

"Thank you, Jem. . .Blackfire. In Galfore's defense, he is only acting as tradition dictates, and as you told Rob'n, Liand'r's life will be under close scrutiny. Koriand'r's and Rob'n's adherence to custom must be absolute."

Blackfire sighed softly. "You're right, of course, but that doesn't meant I have to like it."

"In that you may have far more company than you realize."