my sisters says I shouldn't put chapter two up yet. BUT SHE KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT THE ARTS OF WRITING FANFICTION. *drama*
Disclaimer: I don't own Hannibal. Clarice does. Oh yeah baby. uh uh uh! ow ow!
Upon opening her door, she realized several things. One was the smell. Her entire house smelled like mustard. The second thing she noticed was the fact that a cooking show was blaring in her ears. She winced and turned down the volume a bit. The third and final thing she noticed was the huge amounts of smoke filtering out of her kitchen. She sighed and walked into it to see exactly what she had expected.
"what are you doing in my house, Hanni?" Clarice sighed. He turned around. There was blood all over his face. Clarice grimaced.
"That had better be your blood, Hanni" She said firmly. Hanni frowned, turned around, cut his face with a knife, and then turned back.
"Don't worry. It is. See? Here's the cut!" he said hopefully, pointing to the cut. Clarice sighed angrily and looked around. She noticed that the oven was on.
"So, what are you cooking?" she asked angrily. Hanni turned off the oven quickly.
"Nothing." he said. Clarice frowned.
"alright...HEY HANNI, WANNA GO ON A DATE?!" SHE ASKED SUDDENLY. whoa...anyways...Hanni perked up and put down his knife. He walked up to her smiling like a.....madman.....okay just forget about that last bit.
"Hmmmmmm.........what are you saying Claricccccce?" he whispered. Clarice wiped the spit off of her face.
"I'm saying...I wanna go out with you on a date!" she exclaimed. Hanni smiled.
"OKEE DOKKE!!!! THAT SOUNDS GREAT!" he shouted.
Clarice smiled and pulled out a blindfold.
"Okay now it's a surprise so you'll have to wear this blindfold" Clarice said.
"bitch"
"freak"
"whore"
"Psycho" Clarice spat and she put the blindfold on Hanni. He grumbled but learned to accept it as you must accept all things in life. Ooh. that sounds like a yoda quote. Yoda kicks ass.
LATER........
Hanni felt the car come to a stop and he heard Clarice's door open.
"Okay, now I need to get some more gas for my car. You stay RIGHT THERE....okay?"
"Yes momma"
Clarice walked away. A minute passed. Hanni slowly took off his blindfold. They were indeed at a gas station. He sat in the drivers seat and hot wired Clarice's car. He started it up and was about to go when he turned to the readers.
"Remember kids, safety first." Hannibal said as he buckled his seatbelt. Then he took off at 80 mph down the street against traffic.
"KYAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! KYAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!" Hannibal laughed. Suddenly, his new car came to a sudden stop in front of a Mcdonalds. Hanni licked his lips and ran inside.
MEAN......goddamn capslock......
Meanwhile inside the Mcdonalds.....
Mario and Santa claus were enjoying a good ol fashioned Happy meal. It was all very scientific. WHEN SUDDENLY, HANNIBAL LECTOR, WORLD RENOWNED CHAMPION OF COMPETIVE DANCING CAME IN WITH A MEAT CLEAVER AND A HUMAN HAND IN HIS MOUTH. OH IT WAS SO HIDEOUS!
"Hey is that Ted turner?"
GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHI DON'T WANNA FINISH THIS.
THEN HANNIBAL ATE THEM ALL THE END.