Hey hey hey! It's chapter three! Thank you guys so much for the lovely reviews! I feel so loved! This chapter is longer, just as you guys whined for, haha. Please enjoy!

House leaned back into the leather seats of Cuddy's car, fiddling with anything he could get his hands onto. He was currently hitting the windows up-windows down button on and off, taking immense pleasure in the sound of Cuddy starting to get annoyed, visualizing her emitting a boiling-teapot whistle and have steam shoot out of her ears. She tapped her nails on the steering wheel, keeping her eyes on the road. "Can you please stop that?"

"Depends. Would you be more or less pissed if I messed with the radio or the air conditioning instead?"

"You're just trying to get back at me for not letting you take us there on your motorcycle."

House scoffed, "Huh-yeah! This car is ridiculous. Child-proof doors, seatbelts, and airbags all around? I mean, the whole thing screams 'I'm desperate to be a soccer mom'."

Cuddy heaved sigh. "As opposed to the death-trap on wheels? How many times have you wrecked it, again? And roll up the damn window, my hair's flying everywhere."

He obliged, all the while mimicking her in a high-pitched voice, then reaching towards the radio, only to have his hand swatted down. They were at a red light, and Cuddy took advantage of the time to shoot the nastiest glare humanly possible at the man.

"This is not a game."

He merely grinned, and when the light turned green, the radio blasted to life. Cuddy frowned deeply as House messed with the dial, causing a nasty static-y sound to merge with the occasional music station that he never let play for more than five seconds. What the hell was she thinking, getting herself into all of this? She frowned deeper. She knew exactly what she was thinking. She was thinking that with the time she spent with him, he would somehow open up to her and show that he had changed thanks to his trip to Mayfield, and that he realized how much he wanted a relationship with her. Ha-ha, she laughed inwardly, her conscious sounding very sour, keep dreaming.

----

Ten agonizing minutes later, her red Acura TL pulled into the parking lot, purposefully passing up all the good spots, and setting for a nice sixty or so yards away. House gaped at her.

"That is just plain cruel."

She offered only a sly smile as she opened her door and slipped out. He stared after her as she continued about halfway to the store, and paused, looking back. House heaved a sigh. This is going to be one hell of a shopping spree, he thought bitterly as he heaved himself out of the car.

----

"Let's shop for you first." House huffed a "Whatever" as Cuddy started off towards the men's section. He took the moment away from her lean against the wall of the shop, breathing heavily. His fingers twitched, instinctively wanting to reach into his pocket to get his capsule of Vicodin. Old habits die hard, he thinks as he shakes his head and pushes past the pain to follow her.

Cuddy was standing at a particular rack of swimming trunks, board shorts, sifting through them, looking for his size. He felt oddly nostalgic at the sight. "Can I have some shorts with flames on them, mommy?" He snorts as she gives him a dry look and pulls out a dark green pair, holding them out to him expectantly.

"Here."

House stared at the article of swimwear like it was an extra-terrestrial object. His leg burned at the sight of it. He looked away and scanned for something else, anything else.

"You think they have wetsuits here?"

She screwed up her face. "House, we're taking swimming classes in a five-foot deep pool, not surfing lessons in the Pacific."

He offered only a scoffing sound. Her eyes caught sight of his hand twitch towards his thigh. Pity flooded through her and she banished it as quickly as it came. She placed the board shorts back on the rack and cleared her throat. "They have some , um, jammers near the back." Cuddy bustled off again, flushing. Of course he wouldn't want loose swim shorts. They would roll up in the water and show his scar.

----

One pair of streamlined black jammers later, the duo were roaming around the women's section. House was soaking it all up, mind swarming with so many inappropriate thoughts as he eyeballed several rather provocative looking bikinis. Cuddy knew very well he was enjoying himself, and didn't really care what he thought as long as he wasn't talking.

She was examining a nice ruby-colored one-piece when an employee came over. "Hi! I'm Cherry, the assistant manager here at Splash Suits. Can I help you with anything?" Cherry flipped her platinum blonde hair out of her eyes as she offered her best employee smile. She looked to be about twenty, probably in college. Cuddy fought not to scowl at her choice of clothing (a tank top and short shorts, of course.)

"Oh, no, thank you. I'm fine here."

"Okay then, I'll be in the front if either of you need me," Cherry said, and sneaked a look at House that made something ugly bubble in her chest. The trampy girl offered a smile and left, swinging her hips purposefully. House let out a slow exhale.

Cuddy turned sharply and snatched the one piece, huffing her herself.

"Hey!" House called out suddenly stopping the assistant manager, and causing the other customers to turn in their direction, "Do you guys have monokinis?" He made a show of pointing at his employer and winking. Cuddy thought her cheeks would catch fire. "House!" She cried out, but she was cut off.

"Actually, we do." Cuddy fought back the urge to choke. Cherry had made her way over to them yet again.

"They're in the back." Cherry used such a voice that she could have said anything and it would have sounded irresistibly sexy.

"But, I don't know if they come in sizes that, uh," Cherry shot a disapproving glance at Cuddy's hips, "large."

Cuddy's jaw hit the floor. House frowned. "So they only come in size anorexic? Which, I'm guessing by the way you're smacking your spearmint gum, is what you wear, little-miss I-stick-my-fingers-down-my-throat?" Cherry's eyes flashed with something along the line murderous intent. She pursed her lips and said, her voice a void of any emotion,

"Again, if you need anything, don't hesitate to ask." She wheeled around and muttered loud enough for the two to hear, "Bastard."

Cuddy turned around again, submerging herself into browsing the swimwear, trying hard not to let House see the smile plastered on her face.

----

"Cuddy, you have five suits picked out," House whined to his boss through the stall of a changing room, "And not one of them is a bikini!"

"Quit whining and hand me one of them already." Her clothes were draped over the door and House could see her high heels sitting neatly to the side of the stall, and her bare feet if he leaned over and craned his neck. It's a shame they don't have mirrors on the floors, he thought sadly. He held up a skimpy bikini and grinned to himself. I guess this will just have to do.

Cuddy huffed in annoyance as House took forever to hand her the first suit. She glanced into the long mirror on the inside of the stall door and admired her nude figure, then frowned slightly and turned to examine her ass. It's not that big, is it? Before she could contemplate her rear size, her eyes caught sight of her clothes disappearing! By the time she had turned around, not even her bra was hanging over the stall door.

"House! What the hell are you doing!?" She could hear him laugh from the other side of the door. "Give me my clothes back, you son of a bitch!"

"Okay."

She could not believe her eyes when an impossibly tiny two-peice was thrown over the door. She caught it, glaring incredulously at the door and shaking her head slowly.

"Try this on, first."

"You've got to be kidding."

"Think of it as payback for making me walk half a football field in the parking lot."

"You're a pig!"

"I know. Don't forget to let me see when you're done."

Cuddy thought her teeth would surely crumble by how hard she was gnashing them as she slipped on the bikini. The damn top barely even covered her breasts. He might as well have given her a thong and nipple-stickers. She turned to examine herself in the mirror and almost gasped.

The black of the bikini accentuated her tanned legs and the top reminded her why she always thought her breasts were her nicest features. It looked nice, sexy. She actually liked it. Not that she'd ever admit it.

Ever.

"You done?"

"I hate you."

"So you're done?"

House was grinning ear to ear as the changing room stall door opened slowly and revealed Cuddy, arms folded and looking very cross. He sucked in a breath and bit his lip, eyes widening and eyebrows raised. She flushed an angry red as his eyes raked over her body ravidly.

"WOW." Cuddy shot him a death glare and promptly snatched a handful of the swimsuits. The door shut with a snap and she snorted. As she slipped out of the skimpy swimwear and into one of the suits she selected, she allowed herself another flattered smile.

----

In the end, she decided upon getting a dark grey one-piece that tied in the back, at a lovely price of two hundred and forty dollars. Cuddy stood at the check out, and glanced at House.

"You can go on. I know it'll take you a while to get to the car." He gave her a frown and limped off. As soon as the door closed after him, Cuddy faced the checkout employee and set out the black bikini.

"Oh, and, I'd like this too, please."

"Yes ma'am."

Okay, wow! Long chapter! I hope it was worth your time! Um, a lot of swimwear talk going on. Just, uh, go to wikipedia and look up "swimwear". Please review! /Okay I made another change.. Thank you alex for pointing that out! Cuddy IS a fashion victim. The original price was way too low. It's actually kind of embarrassing that I didn't catch that myself.