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Author's Note on the bottom!

SEVENTH CHAPTER: THE DATING GAME

Of 'Men in Black' and a Spy.

"Hmph." Ichigo said as he peeked through a bush. He looked down, then ran a hand through his orange hair. "... Why am I here?" He grumbled as he watched Rukia and Renji pass by. "I don't think I'm s'posed to care."
"Hey, Renji! Look at this!" Rukia squealed as she picked up a small, fluffy, bunny stuffed animal.

Renji grinned at her, pulling it hastily away from her. "You and your bunnies." He humphed as he walked away from her with the bunny in hand.

She pouted. "H- Hey! Give it back! I want to bu- ... y... ?" She saw him walk up to the cashier and give the bonus money to him. Then, Renji came back with a basket, the bunny, and a receipt.

He stuffed it in her hands. "Here." Renji said, stuffing his hands in his pockets, he wasn't wearing shinigami uniform today. "The man gave me a basket to put the bunny in it."

Rukia smiled happily as she held the basket firmly, gazing lovingly into the bunny's eyes. "Thank you Renji! I think I shall name it... Abasaki." She announced, pulling the bunny out of the basket and holding it up in the air.

"... Abasaki?"

Renji lifted a brow. It sounded like a name of some random kid off the street. "What kind of stupid name is that?"

"You baka!" She slapped him on the backside of the head. "Your tattoos are getting to you. It's a mixture of 'Abarai' and 'Kurosaki'!" She told him matter-of-factly. "Duh."

Renji growled. "Why?" It wasn't because he was jealous or anything... he was just curious.

"So I won't forget you." She laughed. "That's the point."

"Whatever, midget." He humphed as he walked past her, bumping into her a little as he walked away.

Rukia ran up to him, and caught his hand. "Don't be mad... assistant captain." She sneakily added to annoy him.

Renji's eyes squinted. "You just can't let that go, can you?" He peered at her with an annoyed smirk on his face. Rukia looked at him as innocently as she could.

"Whatever do you mean, assistant captain? As an assistant captain, I don't think anything could get by you, assistant captain." She laughed heartily, hugging the bunny tightly as she and Renji walked away.

Ichigo watched carefully. "What the hell?! He's seducing her with bunnies!" He growled. Standing up he started to follow them; they were going to a cafe nearby. "Can someone in this dead world tell me how I lost my mind?!"

He rushed to the cafe, suddenly spinning around to look at the back.

Behind him, were two people sitting on one of the cafe's tables

"Hmm..." A man who looked very aristoctic, with 'hair clips' clumped to his hair. He also sported a tuxedo and wore sunglasses. Another man looked very much old, and was very much bald. You can still tell, even though he wore a top hat over his empty-haired head.

"Eh?" Ichigo noticed them, so he called out. "Byakuya, Yamamoto, what are you doing here?"

The captains fell to the floor.

"So..." Ichigo glanced at the hovering captains. "You're secretly taping Renji and Rukia... so you can put them in Shinigami's Funniest Videos?" He asked.

Both captains looked him, then each other, and nodded. "That's correct."

Silence.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU TAKE ME FOR?!" Ichigo yelled, flipping the table in annoyance. "I'm not an idiot!"

Chuckling came from Byakuya and Yamamoto. "Sure, sure." They sighed, Byakuya swatting his hand at him. "You can say whatever you want. Just please, keep your mouth shut."

"Tsk, tsk." Mayuri flicked his tongue. "You'll regret ever meeting me." He pulled out his Ashisoji Jizō, and stood in his battle stance. "It hasn't been fun."

Ishida smirked as his hand rested on the tip of his bow. "Hmph." He raised his bow and arrow, then directed it to the captain. "Have fun in hell."

He was about to unleash his bow, when a tug on his shirt tail made him pause.

"Uryu-san... please... don't." Nemu looked at him with sad eyes. "Please..." She bowed her head down at him, her knees on the floor, as if she was begging him.

Ishida looked at her, a bit shaken by her statement, and thought about it. "..." But, he suddenly remembered that, even though her father was a bastard, he was still her father, in a freakish, un-conservative way.

"Aa." He muttered as he lowered his weapon. "I'll lower my bow down, then."

Mayuri cackled mischievously as he lifted his sword higher, upon Ishida's lowering. "You'll regret that, boy. Now, it will be you who will rot in hell." He told him, about to smash the sword on his head. "I won't even activate my shikai, you're worthless." He smugly told the boy as he was about to strike, head-on.

"..."

Nemu ran up to him and kicked the sword out of his hands. "Don't... you... dare..." She whispered to her father, her right foot planted firmly on his Jizō. "... hurt my friend." She hissed, his sword almost cracking underneath the pressure of her foot.

Mayuri twitched as he stared at his daughter. Now, why did I make her especially strong?

Hitsugaya grabbed his sword's hilt. "..." He walked slowly up to the slumbering figure.

"MATSUMOTO, Get up, before I smite you with my sword!!" He yelled bluntly, his dark aura over shadowing him. Matsumoto woke up in a flash.

"... Gya... G- GYAH!! I'm up, I'm up." She grumbled, rubbing her eyes in disgust. "Geez. You're a kill-joy." She yawned and got up. "Hm." Matsumoto glanced around the office they stood on, then at the clock. "So then... Where is she?"

"... where is who?" Histugaya lifted her eyebrow.

"You know." Matsumoto laughed.

"I don't."

She gaped, then rolled her eyes at her captain. "Then you're very slow, taichou. You know it's three o' clock, right?" She whispered in his ear. Hitsugaya looked at her as if she had dyed her hair purple. "Huh?"

"Hinamori usually comes here by now." Matsumoto told him, running up to a nearby mirror and fixing her hair. "Usually."

Hitsugaya spat. "You're lying."

She chuckled. "And why would I?"

"Plenty. For instance, Matusmot-" Hitsugaya started, about to spill out a million reasons why Matsumoto would want to say that. But something, or someone interrupted him and his thoughts.

Shhh! A stack of papers fell to the floor.

"A... Aiya!" Hinamori screamed as she mustered up everything to gather the now- messy papers. "I'm really, really, sorry, Hitsugaya-kun! I accidentally bumped into the table when I first came in... and..."

Hitsugaya laughed to himself as he squatted down to grab all his papers. "Hmph."

"... what?"

"You know." He casually told her, standing up and putting the papers away. Hinamori was confused.

"No... I don't think I know... Hitsugaya-kun!" She whined... She never liked suspense.

"You like calling me Hitsugaya-kun, no matter how many times I told you that I didn't like it, neh?" He said, going up to stand in front of her. "You're really annoying, Hinamori." He put his hand over her hand and messed her head up.

"A... h- hey!" Hinamori grumbled as she swatted his hand away and started to fix her hair. "You're so... Hitsugaya-kun!"

Matsumoto chuckled and walked up to her captain, whispering in his ear. "I win." And, she gleefully walked out the door, slamming it with a BAM!

Matsumoto slid her paper door shut and walked out onto the balcony of her office, leaning on the railing. "Hmm... It seems Hinamori has taken over his heart, neh?" She told herself happily.

"Hmph. It's about time the boy genius got some 'experience'." She joked, looking out into Seretei.

---

"..." Ichigo sat there helplessly next to the two overly-protective(as he sees it) captains. "... I'm bored." He complained to the captains, who were intently watching the couple go on their so-called date.

"So...?" The two men glared at Ichigo simultaneously.

"Ah... a- anoo... can I go?" Ichigo sweat dropped as he got up from his seat and backed away from the dangerous people.

Byakuya looked at Yamamoto, Yamamoto at Byakuya. They made an agreement. "Eh? Sure." They shrugged it off.

Ichigo spaced out, blankly staring at them. "A... Are you for reals?"

"Yep."

"... Ah... A- Really?"

"We really don't care where you go." Byakuya stated. "You'r-"

Ichigo was off into the world.

"That was fast." Yamamoto told the black-haired aristocrat. "If not his first time running like that, it would be record-worthy."

"T- Tatsuki?" Ichigo gaped as he saw her, plain as day in Seretei.
GOMEN NE! I feel really bad for being swamped with homeowrk, and not being able to beta KaRiSa's story(sorry GOMEN too!), but, I guess I have to rush with this. Sorry for mistakes and grammatical errors(especially). Also, sorry inadvanced for such a boring and short chapter, as well as OOC! -insert me stressed-

Anyways... I'm thinking of what to do next. Definitely, I shall finish that Nemu, Ishida, and Mayuri scene, and have a Hitsugaya and Hinamori part, and Tatsuki will be there, alongside Ichigo.

Now, now. Where is Chad and Inoue?

Beats me. I'll add them in the next chapter, maybe...? I'll try to update soon.

-Tsukichiki.