Mixed Feelings
Chapter 1- Us.
(Christian and Syed are talking in the Masala Queen kitchen, set before Syed proposes. In Syed's POV)
"Christian when are you going to realise there cannot be a us." I said calmly but firmly. I was not attracted to him. I wasn't.
"Syed..." He said pleadingly stepping closer. He was close. Way to close what did he expect me to do. It was against my religion. Against God's will. "Listen, stuff like that doesn't happen accidently."
"It does." I paused looking into his eyes. I kept his eye contact for as long as I could manage. " Christian I don't like you." I lied looking away. Okay maybe I did love him but it couldn't happen ever. I looked up. Christian was closer. I looked away again.
"You don't mean that." He whispered, he traced my jaw line and tilted my head up. I didn't fight him this time he took the last step of space in between us without letting my head drop down. He placed his second hand on my cheek and leant down towards me. Seconds past in reality but when his lips touched mine it felt like years. Fire seemed to burn my skin in a good way, where he touched me, it was right and felt good. We pulled away gasping for breath. "I told you..." Christian smiled. The smile lit up his eyes and I pulled him into me and kissed him again. I couldn't help myself. He was... amazing.
When we broke apart this time we didn't seperate. Christian wrapped his arms protectively around me.
"Syed?" He whispered almost silently.
"Yes?" I said slowly.
"What are you going to do?"
"What do you mean?" I said stepping back from him.
"About everything. Your mum, Amira?"
"I don't know, okay?" I said angrily but maybe too angrily. I paced infront of him.
"I know it's hard." He grabbed my hand pulling me around and forcing me to look in his eyes. "But we need to sort this out."
"No." I shrugged him off of me. My angry tone had returned. "I need to sort this out. I need to sort my head out." I daredn't look at him again for the fear that I would stay with him. I wanted to. I really did.
I stormed out of the kitchen slamming the door behind me. I needed to think. I needed to sort it all out.