MEOW okay, here I am with a crazy crack-a-holic Yo Yo story. HERE GOES!

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Fiyero Tiggular, AKA The Yo Yo, streaked across campus. He was headed to Crage Hall to perch in that tree that boy Biq... or Bob... told him about. That was exactly what he wanted to see. Across from his perch was a window, and through that window was the perfect view of Miss Galinda Upland and her roommate Elphaba Thropp. He didn't classify Elphaba as male or female because... she scared him.

"Oh shit..." He chuckled perversely seeing that the blond was in her underwear looking at herself in the mirror.

Galinda wouldn't say she was looking at herself. It was more like studying herself. She had to find the perfect nightgown to keep her cozy and looking stunning. She was hoping a certain someone else was looking at her. Unfortunately all she could tell from the corner of her eye was her roommate reading on her bed. That's when she heard it. "Fucking squirrel get out of my fucking tree!" The blond's eyes widened in fear as she ran to the window.

"What is it, Galinda?" Elphaba looked up.

"Elphie..." Galinda hissed fearfully. "I think someone's out there."

As if on cue, the voice said, a bit louder, "You load of shit pissbitch! You worthless piece of crap! Get your own window to look at!"

Elphaba knelt by the window now as well. "Elphie." The blond was nearly crying with fear.

"Shhh, sweet. Come to me." Elphaba wrapped her arms around her friend while still investigating the voice outside her window.

"I'm going to kill you in you sleep, squirrel! I'll get a fucking pistol and hold it to your fucking bitch ass head!"

The girls' eyes widened with realization. Who in all of Oz said "kill you in your sleep?" Galinda started that growling again. "I'm going to kill him in his sleep! That's what I'm going to do!"

"Galinda." Elphaba said calmly.

"Don't you 'Galinda' me! I'm serious-"

Elphaba kissed her to silence. "Let me handle this." As the green girl took out her sorcery wand she walked downstairs to the tree where the Yo Yo was wrestling with a squirrel.

"You fucking dick licking mother fucker!" The boy shouted before falling from his perch in the tree to the ground. "Shit!" He shouted when he sat up.

"Indeed." Elphaba said, crossing her arms.

Fiyero, oblivious, looked up to the tree, "SCREW YOU!" He shouted, and flipped the poor tree off.

"Well, Mister Tiggular, what a pleasant surprise." Elphaba tried again.

"You'd be lucky to see the Yo Yo bitch. What the fuck you doing here?" Fiyero dusted himself off.

"I was about to ask you the same thing."

"What you gonna rape me again?" He nearly shouted.

"What is with you and this rape accusation?"

"Did you just insult me dyke?" Fiyero held up a fist.

Elphaba set her mind up with spells to assist her if a fight occurred. "Not at all."

"Yeah you did." The prince stepped forward. "You called me an acne-station."

The green girl rolled her eyes at the mispronunciation. That right there was a mistake. The Yo Yo took a good swing at her face. Fortunately he missed. Unfortunately it hit her right breast, only making her sure that the miss wasn't accidental. As her eyes burned into a humongous glare, she raised her wand and chanted swiftly under her breath.

"What the fuck are you doing to me mother fuckin bitch shit eatin-" The boy said no more as he fell unconscious again.

Elphaba stopped chanting midspell and looked at him. She didn't kill him did she? A timid Galinda came out of the shadows carrying a heavy book. "He was getting really annoying." She smiled. Elphaba willingly returned it as they dragged the unconscious freak back to their room.

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That's your next chapter. I don't know about you, but I think I like Fiyero better as a gangsta. He just cracks me up. Anyway, please review. Thank you Fabala :o)
~obsessive-elphaba