Before I go on with my fic and start getting people saying "I'm not true hardcore fan of Phineas and Ferb because some things are inaccurate", I have a little FYI for you guys:
I live in California and have DISH Satellite TV. My mom cut down a lot of channels to save money, so we get two Disney channels: DisneyE (Eastern standards time) and DisneyW (Western standards time). For some reason, Disney thinks that little kids want to watch shit like Hannah Montana, Sonny With A Chance, JONAS and Wizards of Waverly Place and learn how TOTALLY AWESOME HIGH SCHOOL AND BEING A TEENAGER IS with repeating laugh tracks, cheap 'humor' and actors who can't act or sing (YOU KNOW WHO). Uh, no. Phineas and Ferb has that spark of what cartoons were like for me growing up- wishing that *I* could build awesome gizmos and gadgets like they can, go on huge adventures, laugh at the dumbest things that I did or didn't understand, and just plain have fun everyday with my friends and/or siblings.
But they hardly ever SHOW it.
Besides marathons, they show P&F only about 3 times a day- and they're almost always episodes I've already seen. Most of the information I get for my fic (if I don't know something) is from the internet and Wikipedia (yeah, I know). I'm not perfect, of course, so I apologize if I get something off. Know that I didn't intend it and blame the Disney channel for not giving me more P&F.
Cartoon Network is fail now (except Chowder and Flapjack).
Nickelodeon is fail now (Spongebob is still good, but... eh, it's kind of not like it used to be).
All I have left of my childhood was Disney, and it's a DAMN SHAME that they only have ONE good cartoon airing.
TL;DR DON'T BITCH AT ME IF I GET CHARACTERS/SETTINGS/WTF EVER WRONG. BLAME DISNEY.
blah, sorry but it had to be said. Now- ONWARDS TO CHAPTER 8.
P.S.
yes, I realized I did not add The Suite Life of Zack and Cody- that's because I enjoy that show and I love crossdressing twins. TWINCEST: IT ARE GUUUUD
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Everyone had gathered back in Doofenshmirtz's office (despite the fact he mentioned no one was allowed in there except him), with Perry leaning against the wall, Peter sitting on Heinz's desk, Vanessa sitting on the couch with her arms folded, and Doofenshmirtz standing between Perry and Peter, scratching his head nervously.
"Sooo, let me get this straight," Vanessa said, "you," she pointed at Peter, "are another Agent P who SOMEHOW got put in the same predicament as Perry here," she jammed a thumb over to Perry, "and now your bosses or whatever agreed that you have to work together with my dad to get back to normal?"
Peter kicked his legs back and forth and smiled at her. "Uh-huh! That's about it." He glanced up when he felt someone glaring a hole through his soul and saw Perry, who never took his eyes off of him. Peter's smile vanished and he began to pout.
"Come on, Agent P!" he retorted. "Don't tell me you're still mad that I took Doofenshmirtz away from you that one time! It's not my fault he decided to fuck with me at that convention. I had no choice but to get even with this guy." Perry blushed furiously and stood up straighter and clenched his fist. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?!"he screamed out. Peter's eyes widened but his mouth remained closed. Uuuh, he pissed me off, we got in a scuffle, and it was revenge from there on. He started it..."
Perry stood down and slapped himself mentally. "Oh, yeah. Of-of course, I knew that." Peter raised an eyebrow and grinned. "Ooooh! You thought that- HAHA! I thought bestiality was illegal or something?"
It was completely silent, except for Peter's absurd giggling.
Doofenshmirtz decided to finally talk for the first time today since the lab incident, and cleared his throat loudly. "Anyway, Peter the Pand- eh, Peter, I don't understand how you managed to get caught up in this mess and turned into a person. How- how did you say you, uh, got a hold of my form-"
"I was doing my daily dose of fighting crime when I slipped and fell into a kiddie pool of that stuff. It was weird, I felt so much heavier than usual and saw that my limbs got longer and I had no more fur. I didn't even know the guy was working with you of all things until my Major told me." Peter explained quickly. The last sentence caught Perry's attention and he remembered why he was so mad at Doofenshmirtz last night after talking with Monogram.
"THAT'S RIGHT!" Perry turned to Heinz, his voice causing everyone to jump. "Why didn't you tell me that you were working with someone else on this stupid plan of yours?!" The evil scientist raised up his arms in defense. "I-I just... uh, didn't think it was that important to you! It's not like you could have reached him anyway- he was all the freakin' way in SEATTLE of all places! Besides, he's a little bit better than me at hatching up schemes to get rid the likes of you."
Oh. HELL no.
Perry's eyebrows furrowed together, forming an angry expression. He ran over and grabbed Doofenshmirtz by the collar and slammed him against the wall Perry was previously leaning on. Vanessa stood up and cried out, "Dad!" while Peter hopped off the desk and held her back.
"Listen you bastard," Perry growled menacingly, "I've had it up to here with your bullshit! Everything you do is relevant to me, especially when you're working with someone else! When Monogram told me the things you didn't, I became fucking pissed. I could kick your ass right here and now and not give a shit about you rotting in jail. I'd rather tell my family the truth instead of lying to them and making them believe that I'll never come back home! It's better to have them know that I'm a secret agent and alive instead of an ordinary house pet who ran off and died somewhere on the streets!"
Doofenshmirtz stared down at Perry and said nothing. The shorter man was breathing heavily, his voice worn out from yelling so much. Doofenshmirtz blinked a few times and placed his hands on Perry's, whose grip on his shirt collar loosened when he felt them brush up on top of his.
"I'm sorry, okay?" he replied. "But I hope you realize that if I told you, Dr. Allan would have seriously injured or even killed you."
Perry's eyes opened up wider with surprise. "Dr. Allan?"
"That's his name, the scientist I was collaborating with." Doofenshmirtz replied, keeping his hands on Perry's. "He's not like me, you know. Easy to... defeat. Psh, I'm surprised Peter the Panda was able to beat him, much less put him behind bars. An-anyway, he contacted me because he was interested in my work and I suggested the formula. We could both take over our own home cities with the cuteness that was little kittens (but in human form, which just added to the Adorable-As-Hell Meter), because, you know, no one can say no or hurt baby catboys and catgirls. Seriously! You're heartless if you do! Which leads into another back story that I'm not going to get into, but! But the point is-
"If I had told you that Dr. Allan and I were working together, I just knew you would have gone after him as well (since you're heroic and want to get the job done right and all). However you would have literally died trying to stop him. He doesn't screw around, you know. I mean, even I was a little afraid of what he would do to me if I said no. You know how I always try to get rid of you with rockets, lasers, and what not, Perry?" A nod. "Well, Dr. Allan doesn't use those sort of things. He's an expert at catching any kind of Agent, no matter how good they are, and torturing them to death. I'm talking putting you on a gurney, strapped so you can't move, and slowly cutting you up into pieces and shreds with a scalpel and other sharp objects."
Perry remembered about being told how several Agents over in Seattle were given the assignment to take down just one scientist, were later reported M.I.A. and hadn't returned to their families or reported in to their Majors for months. They were all assumed K.I.A. and replacements were ordered for. It upset Perry that their families had to deal with the fact their beloved pets were gone forever, and it made him reflect on his own family.
"So," Peter cut in, "you were protecting Perry, then?"
Perry's eyes darted back up to Doofenshmirtz, "Is that... is that true? You were-" Doofenshmirtz turned his head away, eyes looking down at the floor and didn't say a word. The only response Perry got were Heinz's hands gripping on his own tighter, and a dark blush creeping up to his cheeks and ears. "Do-do you think you guys can step outside for a second?" he asked Vanessa and Peter. His only daughter clearly looked worried about her father's mental being (for once) but reluctantly walked out with Peter following behind.
Gulp.
When the door shut, Doofenshmirtz continued, "Anyway, I mean, I... consider you my best friend, even if all you feel is hatred for me. I was about to say that you were my only friend before Vanessa came in that one time, remember? Differences and all things evil aside, Perry, I-I really... like you... somewhat."
Perry released his hands from Doofenshmirtz's collar and tried to pull away, but the taller man held onto him firmly. "What are you- what are you saying?" Perry asked, his eyes were completely avoiding his rival's. "We're not... supposed to like each other. I love to hate you, that's. All." Heinz chuckled a bit and then began laughing as if he had just heard a joke.
"What's so funny?!" Perry cried. "I'm being honest here! Why- I mean- AUGH! I've been feeling these weird emotions ever since I became a human, my heart beats as fast as a race car when you barely graze my hand, and I'm always blushing like crazy! My emotions are so mixed up that I don't know whether I hate you or love you!"
Doofenshmirtz stopped laughing at that instant and Perry covered his mouth with both of his hands at the realization of what he had just blurted out. 'Oh no.'
"You... love me?" he asked. Perry turned around and was suddenly in a panicked state. "I... that's not what I meant! I just-" He was about to dash out of the room, but felt arms wrap around his waist that prevented him from leaving. He looked back as far as he could and saw Doofenshmirtz grinning madly. "I knew you couldn't hate me forever, Perry! I'm so glad you see me as a better friend than an enemy!"
Perry's eyes blinked as wide as they could. "Wait, you don't understand! I mean, I think I'm... in love with you. Because I hate you." he growled. "I don't even know anymore, this "love" thing hurts my brain..." It got quiet again, but instead of getting rejected, Perry heard Doofenshmirtz laughing again. "I don't see what's so funny here! Your only arch enemy might be- GRRR!" Perry felt so angry and humiliated that Heinz was laughing this hard at him, and ended up elbowing him in the stomach and getting away.
He was inches away from the door when he got pushed out of the way, and this time, Perry was the one slammed against the wall. Heinz locked the door and grabbed Perry's wrists. He slammed them against the wall, which made Perry cry out from the sudden pain.
"I thought you promised not to start of with the violent stuff again, Perry?" Doofenshmirtz asked seriously, leaning closer. "Didn't I tell you that you would regret it?" Perry turned his head from side to side and whimpered. This was becoming unbearable. "I don't give a damn, anymore..." he replied, his eyes looking angry again. "Do whatever you fuckin' want. I just don't care anymore!" Heinz tsk'd but smiled. "Alriiiight, but you asked for it."
Perry glared at him and growled again, "I don't ca-" He didn't finish his sentence, as he was silenced with lips pressed up against his own.
The world stopped.
Time stopped.
And Perry was sure that his heart had stopped.
--
BLAH SORRY THIS IS A SHORT CHAPTER. I wasn't sure and actually debated whether or not to include Peter the Panda in TIIL. In the end, I decided I should, since he'll be relevant later on (I think).
YES, YOU MAY START FANGIRLING NOW. I WON'T JUDGE YOU GUYS LOL
P.S.
I understand that is having some troubles, both with uploading, logging in, and reviewing stories. Don't worry, it's pissing me off too. -__- I notified the admins two times, some problems got fixed, but then they started up again. So if you are unable to review my story because of this issue, I'll understand. I was actually kind of in shock on how many reviews I got from the last chapter (I was all, "that's it? lol"), but when I foudn out about the glitches, the light in my head went on.
