Hey, guys, I realize that there have been faulty update where there was nothing new, but that was just me taking down the chapter for edits and then accidentally uploading ch. 4 as ch. 7. Brilliant, no?

Ugh, just read -.-

"Okay, what the fuck."

Robin looked up from his newspaper and coffee to see a very disgruntled kangaroo staring back at him.

"You'll have to be a little more specific."

"You went to the club, you brought her home, you made out… why aren't you guys getting all lovey-dovey? Isn't this the point where you can't keep your freaking hands off each other? Therefore totally grossing us out?"

"Things got… complicated," Robin groaned, folding the paper and chucking it across the room.

The shapeshifter yawned, stretching his arms out wide.

"Meaning what?" BB inquired further.

"It was weird. …First… first, yeah, we were making out, we went inside her room, more hooking up. But then, I don't know, I just sort of lost track of what was happening and her shirt was off and she was crying and… . I guess that you could say that things got a little bit messed up."

"No shit."

"But she was crying out of nowhere and she runs out of her room…, but then she comes back and starts flipping out at me and pushing me out of the room! Just shouting at me! Something about losing everything."

"Weird," concluded the green boy.

Taking a sip of coffee, he stretched his legs out on the couch. He swallowed the bitter drink with nary a wince, actually enjoying the severity and intensity of it. Interested, Beastboy reached for the cup, carefully tipping it, before pursing his lips and squinting his eyes in disgust. Taking three unsuccessfully subtle steps, he spat the liquid out in the sink, happily ridding the taste from he mouth.

"Dude! How can you drink that stuff? It tastes quinine and mud," the changeling exclaimed, violently wiping his mouth with his arm.

"That's what I like about it. It's sobering. Wakes me up," the masked Titan smiled, taking another huge sip, just to make his friend cringe.

"Nasty. … So what are you going to do?"

"In terms of the Raven situation? Talk to her, I suppose. But I'm not sure if she's ready for me to tell her yet. She seems really freaked out. I just want to get back to something where we're both… comfortable, I guess. Whether this thing is romantic or not… I don't care, I just want to be able to spend time together."

Beastboy took a seat next to him.

"I don't know if that's the best thing to do."

"Why?"

"Well," he began, "she might be freaking out because she isn't sure what you guys are either. You fight a lot. But you also flirt a lot. And you laugh a lot… you guys seem happy around each other. But you have a ton of ups and downs because you don't know where the line is."

"The line?" asked Robin.

"The line between friends and something else, the line that determines the middle ground… something like that. If you tell her, yeah, she probably will freak, but you'll get it off your chest and she'll know what you want and she'll know that you're serious about her. She might not be ready for it, but dude, it'll make her think. She can't run from the truth."

Robin nodded slowly and ran a hand through his uncommonly unspiked hair, confused. Beastboy had been right about everything so far… but he wasn't sure if he really wanted advice from someone who transforms into small animals so he can sneak into changing rooms. Just telling her… just marching up there… telling her to her face… it scared him. He didn't want her to not be ready. He didn't want her to reject him or run away.

That's why he was trying to force himself to sit down. That's why he was shocked that he didn't want to.

Curiosity was always his biggest vice.

That or pride.

"Gonna go talk to her?" his friend asked, sniffing the coffee.

"Yup."

"You wanna tell her?"

"Nope."

"You going to anyway?"

"Probably."

"Have fun."

"Later."

His heart pounded harder, harder, with each passing step, with each step closer to her door. It had yet to cross his mind that he was actually going to walk up to her, look her in the eyes and just say it. Just say those three little words. 'I love you,' suddenly sounded more like a threat than a declaration of one's heart. He swallowed hard and raised hit fist, tapping his knuckles against it.

Knock knock knock

"Rae? Can I come in?"

No voice answered, but he knew she was in there and ignoring him because of the rustling he heard.

"Come on, Rae, I just want to talk to you. Can I please come in."

Silence.

"I know the code to your door. If you don't-"

The door slid open with a dull slam and she leaned against the doorway, staring at him. Robin gulped, noticing her capeless leotard and bare feet.

"If I don't what? Are you sure you would? Invade my privacy and risk getting on my bad side?"

"I…"

"Uh-huh… what did you say you wanted to talk about?" she inquired impatiently.

"Us?"

"What do you mean us? There isn't an us."

She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, wondering exactly how she was going to get out of this one. She nodded and stepped aside, allowing him in.

"You can talk and paint at the same time right?"

Robin blinked and took the painting roll she handed to him, only then realizing that there were plastic sheets over her furniture and half of a wall was painted indigo.

"Yeah… I guess."

"You guess?"

He shrugged but started working, Raven beside him.

"You were saying?" she drawled.

"I wanted to talk about us."

"I just told you that there isn't one."

"Fine then, I want to talk about you and me. I know that things are different between us. Things have changed since we defeated the brotherhood."

She dipped the roller back into the paint and started again, twitching her nose as a spot of paint landed on it. She wiped it away and continued.

"Rae?"

"What?" she snapped.

"You never responded."

"I never had anything to say," she growled, vigorously covering up the stony grey of her walls.

"I do."

Robin kissed her lips gently, adoring her absolutely, the feeling of her satiny mouth treasured and memorized. But he felt hands against his chest, pushing him away, tearing away the arms that snaked around her.

"I thought you had something to say."

"Don't you think that actions speak louder than words?"

"What do you want," she demanded, wiping the corner or her mouth with the back of her wrist.

"I think I should be asking you that question, Rae," he sighed. "We flirt, we joke around, I respect your boundaries. I ignore everything for you, so I don't mess up, so you feel comfortable. And you made everything so unclear! I don't get it… at all, you get pissed drunk, demand that I kiss you, get mad at me for not kissing you…… but when I do, you yell at me? What do you want from me, Raven?"

She averted her eyes desperately, watching her wall as if she was watching the paint dry. But it was too difficult for her to pretend not to hear, because every word made her heart drop in surprise.

"I don't know what we have…" Robin whispered, taking a seat on her plastic covered bed, remembering the passion of the previous night.

She knew the mystery drove him insane, she knew it made him weak. Yet, she was afraid. Afraid of herself, because things were irregular, even for her life.

"What do we have, Rae?"

"Nothing. I'm not allowed to have the something you're looking for."

"Oh, that is bullshit and you know it!" He shouted, vexed. "Nothing blew up last night! And you can't tell me with a straight face that you were controlling yourself all this time, because I know that you felt something last night. Because I lost control too…"

"So what? Do you want me to be some friend with benefits? Like we're normal?" Raven asked calmly, coldly, crossing her arms like coiled snakes. "Like we're just two average kids who date outside their social circle, just like in the Breakfast Club? Is that what you want?"

"You know what I want. And I'm done bending over backwards so you can just yell at me anyway, I'm sick of you thinking yourself better than me. This time, you can take the risk."

". . ."

"Tell me that you don't feel for me and I'll back off…… but I'm tired of being lied to. I'm tired of waiting."

She wouldn't drop her walls, she didn't want to, even though it would destroy him. Even though it would destroy his heart. She knew he would hurt her, after all, relationships included hurt, and he was troubled and dark… too much like her, yet too full of light.

She spoke poison and watched it kill him.

"I don't feel for you. I don't want you. I don't need you. And I won't… ever."

Her room began to flash red and the blaring whine of the alarm filled their ears. Robin stared onward, frozen, as she ran past him, ripping a cloak from a hanger.

He had wanted to be with her, to sleep with her, to be hers. He had wanted to hold her close and whisper thing in her ear, to tell her his theories and brainstorm with her. Even arguing would have been fine with him. But there was no going back and he stared at the broken remains of their friendship and felt alone.

He was alone and he wanted to weep, but his mind was too stunned, his heart was too broken to work, his eyes were too dry. So he walked with robotic despondency to the common room, clicked on the monitor, and watched as Mumbo rampaged through the city.

He wished that it would all burn to the ground.

Brining out his keys, he mounted his motorcycle, ordering his team with the strongest "go!" he could muster, letting the roar of the machine deafen all the thoughts he hated to think.

He was alone and he was wrong. About everything. About how she felt for him, about what she needed, about his limits.

And he was angry. He could feel it pulse though his body, that raw, pure, self-hatred kept him going, driving him to the thing he was meant to do. Just protect the city.

Just do the same thing day after day, just protect the civilians that are too stupid to move to a safer place. Just give up any right to have a normal life.

Lead the titans. Save the city. Don't die. Repeat.

Don't make time for yourself.

Don't fall in love.

Put everyone else first.

If only he had followed the rules, the standards that he and everyone else expected of him.

So, with his bo staff raised, he charged, slamming into the blue magician with all his force, knocking the man off his feet.

"No hello? Why, Robin, it seems as if you have forgotten your manners."

Narrowing his eyes, Robin swung the metal rod at the man, who contorted and avoided, pointing a wand at him.

"No witty comeback?" he asked, grinning like a fool. "Feeling a little under the weather?"

He cackled, waving his wand. Storm clouds grew overhead, screaming with thunder and lighting. With a flash of blinding, burning light, one that came and went too quick, a man fell to the ground and the air filled with the stench of burning flesh. Raven rushed to him, checking for pulse, for any sign of life.

"He didn't survive, you know," smiled Mumbo, twirling his wand in his hand, raising his cuffs over his wrists. "After fifty thousand volts? It seems as if prison has stuffed a new trick up my sleeve."

Black encircled Raven's hands and Mumbo's hat, threatening.

"Ah, ah, ah, Rae-Rae… we wouldn't want to shock Robin, would we?"

She stared at them, the way Robin looked at her, blank, void of any and all feeling. She lowered her hands.

"What do you want, Mumbo?"

"Ah, see," he enthused, turning to the other titans, frozen at the sight of the stalemate, "negotiation is key. Such a smart girl you have on your team. …I want you all to step aside and I want all the bank's money in this here hat. …Or Robin ends up like Bob over there."

They stood, shocked, caught stone-like in their tracks, waiting for the storm to settle.

But Robin would have none of it. He jumped, flipped, and let loose, relishing the cracks that unfurled as his foot collided with Mumbo's face and the blood that leaked onto his shoe. Kick after kick after punch, the man just kept smiling.

"Robin, stop!"

More blood, more kicks.

"Robin, he'll kill you!"

His hands and feet red, his ears blocked, he threw her off as she pulled at him, trying to restrain him, restrain his madness, trying to keep him strong. She saw, she knew, and terror bubbled in her stomach. With every attack, Robin was growing more and more unhinged. She began to pull harder, push against him, trying to save him from the blind rage that would end his life. She screamed her mantra over and over and over, encasing him, trapping him. But just as her powers were conjured by will, they were defeated by it.

"How touching… so desperate for his safety, so afraid of his fury…, is this your first time breaking a heart, Raven? Are you too afraid to tell him the truth?"

'"Shut up before I snap your neck in half."

"Are you truly that selfish, my dear," the thief snickered. "Were you scared to hurt him… or was that vice versa? Look at him, kiddo, he's a wreck. You would drive a person to this point because of fear? You might be a fantastic bad guy under all that blue. Want another shot at being my assistant?"

"I said be quiet," she screeched, the black cage weakening, black sparks coursing around her.

Hey eyes went white, and her hands rose. Things began to shake. Streetlights melted, their bulbs shattering along with nearby windows. Mumbo's eyes widened as gates, stone, metal, glass, wrapped around him, capturing him to near suffocation. Crack, Crack, CRACK! He cried out as he felt his bones crushing one by one.

His wand fell from his hand as he spoke his last words of coherence.

"Careful, my Raven, it seems as if you're killing your favorite bird."

She blinked, her irises reappearing along with her sight.

But she wished that she saw nothing, for the first thing she saw, horrifyingly true and opaque, was her worst fear come to life.

Blood, everywhere. But the blood wasn't coming from the intended source, the deserving source.

For Robin lay on the ground, broken and cut, his uniform tattered, patches of bruised, maimed skin revealed. Running, her body shrieking with fear, she knelt beside him, checking for a heartbeat. She sighed as she felt a weak flutter of a pulse under her fingertips.

"Robin?" She asked weakly, shaking him.

His mask, hanging limply over his eyes, twitched slowly, making Raven shudder.

"……Raven?…"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Robin. I'm so sorry… I'm sorry…"

He swallowed, trying to quiet his raspy breath. "Thirsty."

"Get some water," she ordered Cyborg.

She glared at them as they watched her, too worried to move. Cyborg stared, his eyes wide, and gulped.

"Go!" She shouted, her eyes crazed and panicked.

Robin shifted under her, hissing lowly at the intense pain that seemed to be everywhere at once. He felt for her hand, his fingers raking at the wet concrete under him. He found it and took it in his. His blood trickled around her arm, and she covered her mouth to subdue the sobs she felt in her chest.

"I never meant to loose control, I never should have been part of this team. I thought that the experiment… I'm so sorry, I'm sorry…"

Cyborg, sparking slightly from the water in his hands, crouched beside Robin and spilled the water into his mouth. But as his task finished, he closed his eyes tight and left, his human eye tearing, too disturbed by the sight of his friend to stay.

She was the only one strong enough.

"I'm sorry, Robin. I'm so sorry." she wept, not knowing what else she could say to him, not knowing what else was right.

She held his hand tight, pressing it to her heart, and sobbed at how weakly it clenched back.

"Don't… cry, Rae…"

"I'm sorr-"

He pushed himself up, screaming internally, and kissed her softly. Raven could taste his bloody lip as he broke away.

"Rae, I l-"

"No," she pleaded, "Robin, please… no. Don't talk. We'll get you to the infirmary… please don't say anything…"

But he took her hand in his and held it over his heart, staring at her through his feeble mask, feeling their hearts break simultaneously. He smiled through the agony and slowly brushed a strand of soaked hair behind her ear, not knowing if it was tears or sweat falling onto his nick.

She trembled and shook, looking at the damage she had done; Mumbo unconscious but breathing, windows broken, lampposts and trees uprooted, the red sidewalks now being cleaned by the rain. Twilight fell when the ambulance finally came to take him to the tower.

She shut her eyes as they pulled him onto the white stretcher, trying to block out his screams of misery and pain, wishing the tears back into her eyes. He began to dye the stretcher crimson, the spot slowly growing.

If only she had been a little braver, a little truer to herself. If only she hadn't allowed him in. Her eyes couldn't quiet, her breath wouldn't calm. He was dying. And it was her fault.

"I love you. Please don't cry."

"Please…please take that back."

But he shook his head and smiled.

"Never."

Read and Review, please. And please be so kind as to leave one saying more than, liked it/loved it/good chapter/update soon. I mean, I love hearing these things, and you can write these things, but it would be fantastic, like REALLY fantastic, to get these word along with what you liked or what could make it better.

And remember, Robin's birthday is coming up soon!