Yay being home alone!!! This is your prize for my germs.

Chapter 9

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Sakura was going to die and break into a million pieces any day now.

Chiharu said nothing as she helped Sakura into a light green dress that she had taken a liking to. Sakura thrived in the silence, not having to explain herself for the first time in a few weeks.

When she was dressed, Sakura thanked her quietly and asked to be alone for a few minutes before going downstairs for breakfast. She wanted to compose herself before she had to go see him.

Or, more accurately, them.

She sighed and fell down on her bed. Then she wasn't sure if she could get back up in this obscenely large dress. She missed her old dresses with no hoop skirts or frills that irritated you all day, and she missed her small, navigable cottage, and she missed Tomoyo.

And she missed her mother and father, wherever they were.

And she missed the old Cyou, who was only her best friend and nothing else.

And if she went back to it all, she would never, ever, miss that pig by the name of Li Syaoran.

And she missed being able to go through a day without crying.

Sakura hastily wiped the tears from her eyes and got up, not wanting to be late for breakfast. You never knew what got you beheaded these days.

As she walked down the halls precariously, she wondered if Syaoran would come out and look for her. Would he force her to be with him, or would he let her go? She decided that the first option was probably more likely.

Finally she arrived at the dining hall. She vaguely noted that it was her first time making it the whole way without help. She walked in cautiously, trying to find Syaoran and Cyou, and then finding a place as far away from them as possible.

She spotted Cyou almost immediately; he sat among some of his fellow soldiers, head down, not speaking. Or eating, she noted. Guilt consumed her.

There was an open chair next to him, but she decided that any conversation they had now should probably be in private. She continued to scour the hall for Syaoran.

He was nowhere to be found.

She looked again, but she still couldn't find him. She tried to shrug it off, telling herself that he was just late, and slid into a spot next to a bunch of people she didn't know.

"-and I heard that he kissed her!" a girl about Sakura's age said with joy from across the table. "Isn't that wild?"

Sakura rolled her eyes and began to eat.

She gasped. "Oh, I beg your pardon, aren't you Kinomoto Sakura?" the young lady nearly screamed, jumping in her seat. "Yes, it is you!"

Sakura half-choked on her food and looked up at the girl. "Excuse me?"

"You're Kinomoto Sakura!" Her obnoxious blonde hair swayed gleefully. Sakura sighed.

"Yeah." She buttered her muffin and took a bite hastily, wanting to get as much eating in as she could before she got interrogated.

"So is it true that you kissed the prince?" she asked, completely unashamed. Sakura tried to ignore her. It didn't work.

"Is it?"

"IS IT?"

Finally Sakura stood and left the table, hungry, angry, and pretty embarrassed. Whoever that girl was, she wanted her gone.

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Sakura sighed. She was going to have to face him at some point. She knocked on his door loudly.

"Enter," he answered. She took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Li-sama?" she called, searching the room. She couldn't see him.

"Tell my mother I want to speak with her," he called from the bathroom. She stayed quiet. Did he think that she was one of his servants?

"Hello?" he called again, stepping out of the bathroom to look at her. "Oh."

She bowed. "Li-sama."

"Don't do that," he said. "I'm sorry." He walked towards her. "Please forgive me for yesterday."

Sakura stilled. She didn't expect it to be that easy. "I should be the one to apologize-"

"Don't even start." He took her hand and kissed it lightly. "Please accept my apology."

"I accept." She looked down to his chest, not able to keep his eye contact. They stood silently for several minutes.

"Let's go on a walk," he said suddenly.

Sakura shrugged, confused. "Okay."

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Sakura found it strange, walking through the grounds with the prince. He was nonchalant, all his princely formalities gone. She still found it difficult to be herself around him.

"Sakura," he asked quietly. She looked up. "What's your honest opinion of me?"

She frowned. "I don't know... I think you'll make an excellent ruler-"

"You know that's not what I meant." He looked down at the road. "If I weren't the prince what would you think of me?"

Sakura stayed quiet for a few moments. "I think that you're a horrible person."

He looked at her and opened his mouth as if he were to say something, then closed it and looked away. "I guess so."

She glanced at him and decided against saying anything, for fear of making it worse. Syaoran sighed.

"I assumed you thought so, but I was hoping that I was wrong." He ran a hand through his messy hair. "Is there any way that I could change your mind?"

Sakura restrained herself from rolling her eyes. "Why do I matter so much? Why couldn't have you said that to the other women before me?" She bit her tongue. She had said too much.

Syaoran's face remained blank.

"Because you are more beautiful than all of them."

This time Sakura let her eyes roll. "Don't you see why that's wrong? Just because a girl isn't as beautiful as me doesn't mean you have to take her life!"

Syaoran looked at his feet. "I..."

"Forgive me, but you are really a shallow human being. If you ever learn to love someone's personality instead of their appearance, I may consider thinking of you differently. Although I doubt that will ever happen. Excuse me." Sakura bowed quickly and ran the direction they came from, letting off all the emotions that had been bottled inside her for too long.

He did not chase her.

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Sakura watched the birds in the trees fly away as she approached. She wished people were like that sometimes, instead of hoarding her and forcing her to answer an impossible question... geez. Syaoran's just... insane.

She grabbed one of the lower branches and attempted to hoist herself up. Sakura climbed trees constantly in her childhood and found it extremely diverting. She could feel her palms scraping against the rough bark; surely Chiharu would kill her when she found out. Nevertheless, Sakura maneuvered herself into the tree and sat on the lowest branch.

"If you're trying to hide you should climb higher," a voice called. Sakura jerked her head up to find a man in uniform a few yards above her gazing curiously.

Sakura was past the point of confusion or disbelief and simply climbed up beside him. He bowed as best as he could, considering he was in a tree. "Kiyoshi Hikoro."

Sakura half-bowed and smiled. "Kinomoto Sakura. I have to ask, what are you doing up here?"

He sighed. "Half the troops leave today for Nagoto. I wanted to say goodbye to some of my friends before they left. So I've been up here trying to avoid training for a few hours. It's not very admirable."

"On the contrary," Sakura protested. "I think it's extremely admirable. Caring for someone isn't as horrible as most people make it seem."

He smiled. She frowned.

"Wait, half the troops are leaving today?"

He nodded slowly. "Most of them are expendables from outside the palace, but there will be a few higher ranked officers that go. Over five of them are my close friends and I don't want to see them go without me."

Sakura's pulse quickened. "Do you know Garate Cyou?"

"You know him?" he asked, curious. She nodded her head.

"Then you should wait with me."

Sakura bit her lip.

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Sakura was partially very proud of Cyou for being acknowledged as such a good commander. But the rest of her, and the considerately larger part of her, wanted to do nothing else but die. There was a more than likely chance that she would never see him again after this day, after such a short period of seeing him after a long period of not seeing him again.

It was painfully confusing. But mostly just painful.

Hikoro proved an excellent shoulder to cry on. He sat silent, timidly patting her back every once in a while. She promised herself no more crying for the rest of the week after this. It was really getting to be a drag.

"I don't mean to upset you, but our goodbyes await us," Hiroko said quietly. Sakura choked back a sob and looked down below her to see around one hundred soldiers walking slowly towards the gates. "We have around ten minutes before they leave."

Sakura wiped her face quickly and nodded. "Thank you," she said hoarsely. He smiled and climbed down before her, helping her when she came down.

"I hope to see you around," Hiroko said quietly before bowing deeply and walking to find other officers. Sakura stood by the tree, standing on her toes to try to see Cyou.

Suddenly arms enveloped around her from behind. She closed her eyes and savored his touch. Cyou.

She turned around to look at him. He was in his uniform, as always, but today it felt different. Not just something he wore, but the thing he wore when he was trying to get killed and killing other people.

"I didn't want to let you know..." he whispered.,"...because I thought you may never speak to me again." He stroked her face softly. " I thought you might hate me after what I did yesterday."

Sakura found it difficult to decipher between happiness and absolute depression. "I may never speak to you after this."

He smiled. "I'd kill everyone in the world before I let that happen."

"You better come back," she demanded. "I don't care if you only one leg. You'll hop to me."

Cyou nodded. "Let's both try our best not to get killed."

Sakura wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her face into his chest. "Don't leave," she muttered, letting out tears that somehow managed to stay behind after the past few days. "Stay."

Cyou squeezed her tightly. "I wish I could."

Sakura refused to let him go. She would go to battle with him, for all she cared. "I'll come with you."

Cyou let out a loud laugh. "Of course you can."

Sakura gripped onto him to the point that her arms ached. She didn't let go when the whistle sounded.

"Sakura, if I don't go I'll definitely be killed, and then you'll have no chance to see me again." He slowly pried her arms off.

She looked at him quietly, then proceeded to kiss him gently on the cheek. "Come back for your kiss."

He grinned. "I will."

She watched him get in line with the other men going off to war. She would have sighed, or done something, but she felt like an empty shell with too many emotions that it just felt raw.

Sakura smiled and waved her only sense of happiness and home away.

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This took a little persuading to write. Oh well. It's done, that's the point, right?