A/N: another of my infamously short chapter updates! but I like to think that you might enjoy more frequent updates than longer one that are much father in between... -___- at least, I hope you do. This one was a bit hard to write and I changed it several times, but I think I'm happy with it now! and look, it's only 12:21! I'm going to bed a full hour earlier than last night! Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

Mello sighed for the umpteenth time that hour as he unlocked his apartment door. It was going to be one of those nights. One where all he could bear to stomach was chocolate while he wondered how other people did this for their whole lives. Like the motorcycle, his favorite sweet treat was a habit leftover from the old days that he couldn't bare to break. When he was stressed, it was the only thing that could comfort him, calm him down.

Now he unwrapped a bar and took the corner into his mouth with a satisfying snap. He could feel some of his muscles begin to untense as it melted on his tongue. Shit, he really was an addict. Thank God it was Friday.

When he was done, Mello made his way to the bedroom while stripping out of his clothes on the way. Jacket, shirt, and pants all formed a trial through the small apartment. Finally he was in only his boxers, collapsed above the sheets on his king-size bed.

He'd splurged and gotten it, but with no friends, family, social life, or significant expenses, what else was he going to do with his money? Besides hiring male prostitutes. Great, just when he'd thought he'd forgotten. Images of that ki—Matt, had been plaguing him since he'd last seen him on Tuesday. That was what, a good 3 days ago? It was getting to be too much.

Sure he was lonely, but whores were something from his old life that he couldn't let back in. Like a recovering addict, if he let himself have 'just one' then he'd want another, and another, and another… In this case he might pull himself back into the world he'd left behind. The world of the Mafia.

Getting out the first time had been a miracle in itself, but doing it a second time would be impossible. There would be no second chances, and Mello just needed to keep reminding himself about that. Like sharks to blood, his old contacts would come running if they heard rumor that the infamous Mello has slipped back into some old habits.

Unfortunately it was getting harder not to drive by old haunts on the way to work 'just to see if they were still there.' With each day sitting in an office, the temptation to call up an old acquaintance and score a little pick-me-up grew greater.

Sometimes Mello found himself wondering if that hospital admittance had been the best or worst thing that had happened to him. Sure it have given him this chance to get it right, but looking around, was this really so much better?

Glancing at is nightstand, he grabbed he small note sitting at the corner.

Matt:

555-7281

Fucking kid, why'd he have to leave this on the refrigerator? Mello had found it that day when he'd come home from work, but kept it despite knowing it needed to be thrown away. He couldn't do it though, couldn't burn this little thread that connected him to the life he once had, and could have again. Staring with having a bit of fun with a certain cute redhead…

No, thinking about it would just make it worse. He needed to catch up on sleeping while he had the weekend, not contemplate on things better left unthought-of.

Just as he was drifting off, Mello heard the sound of frantic knocking. It took a minute for the sound to register but when it did, the blond wasn't happy. Who on earth could be knocking on his door so late at night?! He was pretty certain that no one at the office knew where he lived.

Slipping on a pair of black jeans that were laying on the floor, he stumbled through the kitchen to the front door. He jerked it open ready to yell at whoever had so rudely stopped him from getting much needed sleep.

What the hell?!

End Note: my first cliff hanger! :D if I get 6 reviews for this chapter I'll have the next chapter out by tomorrow night, how's that sound? That takes into account my regulars (I mentioned them in the last chapter and they continue to leave me wonderful reviews!) plus about 2 more. Not so hard right?