You Know That, Right?
Note- This chapter takes place during season three episode seventeen titled "In Heat" The quote mentioned below was used in the episode.
"If we knew each other's secrets, what comfort we would find." John Churton Collins
The second half of the chapter takes place during season three episode eighteen titled "The Crossing."
Chapter Four
Derek Morgan watched as JJ kissed Will- a guy she had been seeing on the down low for about a year. She hadn't wanted anyone to know but they all figured it out anyway.
The only person she talked to about it, that Derek knew, was Penelope but Penelope usually clammed up if anyone so much as tried to get information out of her about it. Her pretty red lips were sealed on that subject.
She was the oracle of all knowing. Not all telling.
Seeing JJ and Will put Morgan in a contemplative state. JJ had been holding back on going for what she really wanted because of her fears. That hit home for him.
Why wasn't he trying to talk to Garcia about his feelings for her? His fear of being rejected and his anger and pain over her not wanting him more than she wanted Lynch.
But none of that changed his feelings. If he was going to be in love with her anyway shouldn't he at least see if she now wanted him? That way he'd have an answer instead of being caught in this not with her but not able to be with anyone else either purgatory.
Still he was in a better mood lately. Laughing and joking again. Did he really want to rock the boat? She just didn't know how much power she had over him.
He was in Miami- far from his baby girl. Luckily, their case was over and he was looking forward to going home. He missed her too much to wait to talk to her so he walked away from Prentiss and Reid, in the police station, and dialed his phone.
She answered with "Hello, my love."
"Hi, girl, we're about to head to the jet."
"I made us all dinner reservations at that Italian place JJ loves so make sure no one eats. Tell me, how is she?"
"She's happier than I've seen her in a long while."
"Yes! Score!"
"Yeah, LaMontagne being down here blew her cover but she seems all right with it."
"I'm so happy for her, sweetness."
"I've got to go. See you in a few hours, baby."
"Your Goddess eagerly awaits your return."
He hung up with a huge smile on his face. There was no denying it anymore. When things were good with Penelope his life was good and when they were off track he was miserable.
His world revolved around her. He didn't want it any other way though.
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The time sat around the table at the restaurant, all laughing and joking. Looking at them Derek remembered how scared they were when Penelope was shot- in his mind he goes back to the moment when he walked into the hospital- and he liked how happy they were now.
If she would have died nothing like this night would have ever happened again. He would have left the BAU and gone home to Chicago, to hole up there and close out the world.
The team would have changed forever.
But that didn't happen. She was saved by the doctors and later by Derek himself and Battle was killed by JJ. They all pulled together. His baby girl was still alive.
He turned his head and looked at her, as she sat next to him. They shared a long look. Then he snuck his hand under the table and took her hand. His pain was easing more and more everyday- and that was all because of her.
The lives they all lived were filled with pain and horror but there were rare moments of joy interspersed for all of them too. Derek wanted to believe he could find his joy with Penelope.
Still there was a voice in the back of his head that warned to be careful now. He couldn't be sure if she felt the same. As she squeezed his hand it felt like-in that moment- she did love him back, though.
(What if that road that you're taking's a dead end?
What if love leaves you all jaded and broken?What if that limb breaks you're climbing out on?
-
Yeah, what if it all goes wrong?
-
But what if it all goes right?
What if it all works out?
What if the stars line up
and good luck rains down?
-
What if you chase your dreams
and it changes your whole life?
-
Yeah, what if it all goes right?
-
What if that road is a beautiful slow drive?
What if that love ends up lasting a life time?
What if that limb holds you- oak tree strong?
What if this time nothing goes wrong?) (Melissa Lawson)
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Susan B. Anthony said, "A woman must not depend on the protection of man, but must be taught to protect herself."
Dealing with a case of a woman being stalked had freaked Penelope out. She had several bad moments when all she could think about was Battle. The other case she had to work that day was a woman who claimed to be abused.
Thinking about that, how woman are such easy victims, upset her and she ranted to Morgan on the phone "Do you know how many woman are killed each year by men? And the saddest part is most of them know their attacker. Do you know when the most dangerous time in a woman's life, when she is most likely to be killed, is?"
He let out an unhappy sigh. "When she's pregnant."
"That's right! And she is usually murdered by the father of her baby. That's just....I don't know what that is...wait yes I do....its inhumane. Women are treated worse in this world than dogs."
"By some people, baby. Not by everyone."
"I know, handsome. This case just sucks. I ran into Keri when she was here and she was so scared.....JJ was shaken by meeting her and, to be honest, so was I."
"I'll be back soon. Hang in there for me, gorgeous, and make sure you're in the office when I get back. I've got something in mind for us to do tonight."
Her heart raced. "I'm intrigued, my love. Care to give me some hints or should I hack your phone to see if you looked up any movies or restaurants or sporting events?"
He laughed. "Woman, you keep your prying eyes off my phone."
"You're no fun."
"Oh, I'm fun. You'll just have to be patient until you find out just how much fun I can be."
"Oh, now you're teasing me again."
He chuckled. "Deal with it, baby."
"Bye, Hot Stuff."
"Talk to you later, sweetheart."
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When he came home he took her to the FBI firing range and taught her how to shoot his gun. She didn't like it but he told her "I need to know you can protect yourself when I'm not around. Can you do this for me?"
She nodded.
He stood behind her and helped her to learn how to stand, hold the weapon, aim, fire, and how to be safe with it. Then he brought back the target. "You're a good shot, baby girl. A little more practice and you'll be great."
"I hate guns!"
"I know, baby, but this is important." He gave her a tender look. "Okay, we're done here for today but now we need to go back to your place for the second part of this lesson."
"A lecture on gun safety?"
"How did you guess?" He grinned widely, holstered the gun, put his hand on her back and led her out of the firing range.
In the next room he signed them out and then he said to her "I know you don't like handling guns but I don't like feeling like you could be in danger when you're away from me.....I need you safe."
"I can handle this. I want to put your mind at ease."
He kissed her forehead. "As long as you're okay, baby, I'm okay."