Okay, second chapter. I'm pretty excited about this fic, I mean, I've got a lot of it planned out already, but these first few chapters are a blank, so I'm just going to fill in the blanks and hope it works… XP

And if any of you are wondering; an 'epitaph' is something written in memory of the dead, such as the inscription on a tombstone or a work of literature dedicated to someone recently deceased. In essence, Naruto's life is like Sasuke's epitaph. (Thus the name of the fic)

It has been brought to my attention that some people don't think Shizune can be Naruto's mother due to her age. (I think that's just stupid, but hell, I'll explain anyway…) Shizune is 28 years old, while Naruto is 12. She is 16 years older than him. I think the problem here is that 16-year-old moms have a damn hard time being moms, mostly because they still have to learn how to take care of themselves as well as care for a helpless infant. Shizune is 28, while Naruto is 12, meaning he can already take care of himself in most cases. If you have any questions regarding this subject, please send me a PM, and I'll get back to you.

Naruto awoke the next morning in an unfamiliar bed, in an unfamiliar room. The bed seemed to be a simple double-sized mattress covered in colorful sheets, ruffled and disheveled from his presence. Looking around the room, the room had simple white walls, a sliding door obviously leading to a closet, a window overlooking Konoha's streets, a small wardrobe and a couple of shelves and a table lined with Scrolls, ninja equipment, and various trinkets. When the door to the room opened revealing a certain Jounin medic, Naruto glanced over curiously.

"Shizune-neechan?" Naruto muttered.

"That's 'kaa-chan' now, Naruto-kun…" Shizune said, smiling broadly.

"Oh yeah…" Naruto muttered as he remembered all of what happened the previous day. "So… where am I… Shizune-kaachan?" Naruto paused as he said it… it was just unreal… he had a mother now, and this was going to take some getting used to.

"This is my apartment, Naruto-kun." Shizune said, smiling as she continued, "Now, do you want some breakfast?"

"Oh… what're we having? I'm starving…" Naruto said, sliding out of the bed and stretching with a groan.

It looks like those anti-depressants are working, Tsunade-sama… Shizune thought as she watched her adopted son walk through the hallway into the combination kitchen/dining room. "Bacon, eggs, and toast… I hope that's enough…" Shizune said. She was new to the whole 'mom' thing, too. She and Tsunade had only finished the paperwork earlier that morning, and then only because they put off most of Tsunade's other work to do so.

"I… Shizune-kaachan…" Naruto muttered, looking down at the food on the table. "This is more than… I mean… I never expected you to cook for me…"

"That's what mothers do, right?" Shizune asked, smiling.

"Y-yeah… I guess…" Naruto said. "I've never really known what it was like to have a mom, so… I don't know what a son is supposed to do either…"

Shizune looked down on her son sadly. "I'm sorry, Naruto-kun… I guess I can always do like my mother did, and other mothers I know…" She perked up slightly, trying to make sure she didn't negatively affect Naruto's mood in any way. "Now don't you worry about how to be a good son, just be yourself, and eat up; growing boys like you need a proper meal to start the day…"

"So… what are we doing today?" Naruto asked between bites. "And… why aren't you having any?"

"Well, I already ate, and Tsunade-sama gave me the day off to move into our new home." Shizune answered.

"New… home?"

"Yes, Naruto-kun… my apartment isn't made for two, at least, not that way…" Shizune muttered with a tinge of pink on her cheeks.

"Well… where did you sleep last night?" Naruto asked.

"On the couch…" Shizune answered, noticing the look on Naruto's face, she continued. "Now, now, Naruto… I'm the mother; I can handle a night on the couch if it means my son gets to be comfy…"

At this, Naruto rose from his chair and walked over to embrace his adoptive mother. "Thanks… Kaachan…" After a few moments, Naruto looked up and tilted his head slightly. "Why didn't you just sleep in the bed too?"

Shizune blushed slightly. "Well… I'm your mother… it's just not good to sleep with my son…" She said, before mentally kicking herself for the way she worded it as Naruto jumped back several feet with a look akin to shock and horror coupled with a blush adorning his features.

"I wasn't talking about THAT, Kaachan!" Naruto yelled.

"I wasn't either!" Shizune said back, sighing heavily. "Being a mom is confusing…" As the moment passed, Naruto started to chuckle, then he started to laugh. Shizune couldn't help but giggle too, and then laugh herself. Being a mom is hard, but it's worth it…

---

After finishing breakfast, Naruto and Shizune walked over to his apartment to gather his things. "Well, this is it…" Naruto muttered as he turned the key in the lock, swinging the door open.

"Oh my… you weren't kidding when you said you had less to move than me…" Shizune said, more shocked at the state of the apartment than its lack of furnishings. She could sum this place up in one word: dilapidated. "We're leaving the furniture…"

"Why?" Naruto asked as he began bagging up the ramen in his cupboards.

"They're all broken down and kinda' moldy… I think I saw the couch move…" Shizune whined playfully.

"Oh alright…" Naruto muttered, setting the bags aside. "The new place should have couches and beds already, right?"

"Yes, from what Tsunade-sama told me…" Shizune answered.

"Okay then… should manage this in one trip then…" Naruto said, moving into his room to fold up his sheets.

"What do you mean 'should' manage?" Shizune asked as she took down several hanging plants. "What about your Kage Bunshin?" Naruto froze. He didn't know what to say… "Naruto-kun?" Shizune asked as she walked over to him and knelt down in front of him, placing her hands on his shoulders now that they were at eye level with each other. "Naruto… just because you're a civilian now, that doesn't mean you can't use jutsu anymore…" Shizune said as she looked into her son's tear-filled eyes. "Things like Kage Bunshin have lots of uses outside… shinobi work…" She caught herself, saying 'killing' in front of Naruto would just cause him to break down again.

"O-okay, Shizune-kaachan…" Naruto said with a weak smile. When his new mother backed away several feet, Naruto placed his hands in a familiar cross-shaped seal. "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

Four Naruto clones popped into existence beside the original, and went to work packing up the rest of what Naruto wanted to keep. This took about five minutes without Shizune's help. "You see, Naruto?" Shizune said as they walked along the street towards their new home.

"Yeah…" Naruto muttered, wondering why they were heading out of the crowded residential districts.

As Shizune led Naruto and his clones through the streets with a map and a note with an address written on it, she was followed first by the original Naruto carrying his bags of ramen and what little of other kinds of food and utensils there were, then by the clone holding his TV and a bag of TV-related things hanging on his back, the clone carrying his sheets and clothes, one with the various plants and trinkets he had, and the last carrying Naruto's trusty microwave with various pictures and books cleverly stashed inside. After about another fifteen minutes of travel, they found themselves in front of a rather large building. "Wow…" Shizune muttered. "So this was his house, huh?"

Naruto and his clones openly gaped at what could easily be called a small mansion, set on five acres of heavily forested land, with a winding path through the trees leaving it relatively invisible to those outside the property. "Th-this is… our house?" Naruto asked skeptically.

"Yes, Naruto-kun… Tsunade-sama found that it wasn't being used, and decided that we might as well live here…" Shizune said, taking out a ring of small keys and walking up to the door.

"Unreal…" Naruto muttered under his breath. "Shizune-kaachan… I was wondering… who lived here?" Naruto asked as he and his clones followed behind.

"Well…" Shizune muttered, wondering just how much she should say. "This house used to belong to the Yondaime Hokage…"

Naruto stopped. "Whoa… really?"

"Yes, Naruto-kun…" Shizune answered as she reached the door, which was oddly on the left side of the house, while most mansions had a door in the center, opening it after finding the right key. There was only one thing she could say at the sight past the door. "Wow…"

Before them was a large entrance hall that could easily fit ten or twenty people; with a large, ornate iron spiral staircase leading up to the second and third floors. The room was littered with paintings, vases, sets of armor, and other items from across the known world, each meticulously organized and cataloged. On the right side was a large archway about one-third of the way toward the staircase, and past that, a sliding door that easily blended into the wall if you weren't looking for it. "Holy shit…" Naruto muttered. "Yondaime was rich wasn't he?"

"He was wealthy, yes… but I wouldn't say he was rich…" Shizune said as she led the way to the staircase. "When he was alive, he was probably the thirtieth or so wealthiest man in the country…"

"That's not rich?" Naruto asked in disbelief, at which his mother simply shrugged.

"Let's find you a room to put all that, Naruto-kun…" Shizune said, taking out a notepad Tsunade gave her. "Let's see… first floor is living space, second are guest and family rooms, and third was Yondaime-sama's private floor… let's take a look at that then, shall we?"

"Wait, you want to stick me in the master bedroom?" Naruto asked, and at a mix of a shrug and a nod from Shizune, he continued. "I thought the parents were supposed to get the master bedroom…"

"Naruto, trust me… you need the extra space more than I do." Shizune said as she started to climb the staircase before playfully adding; "What if you bring a girl home?"

Naruto and his clones blushed, almost dropping his stuff recoiling from the question. After a moment, Naruto thought up a question of his own. "What about you? I'm not the only one who could bring someone home y'know…"

Shizune blushed and looked over the railing at the boy. "Trust me, Naruto-kun… it's a lot more likely that you'll bring home a girlfriend before I can find a boyfriend… besides, if I do, we could always go to his house…" She said in an oddly cheery tone. "Besides, I can always split my stuff between the other rooms. You've got a whole apartment to put in one…"

"Yeah, but…" Naruto muttered as he too started ascending the stairs.

"No 'buts' mister… I'm your mother and I want you to have the better room. End of discussion." Shizune said, trying her hand at a commanding motherly tone.

"Yes, Kaachan…" Naruto said as he tried to catch up to her.

When they reached the second floor, Shizune flipped through the notepad looking for information. "Apparently one of these is a bathroom… third on the left I think." She said, looking down the hall. There were six rooms on the second floor, three on each side. "I'll probably take the room at the end; closest to the bathroom." Shizune said with a wink.

Naruto shuddered slightly before they continued up the stairs. The third floor was blocked by a thin sliding door that Shizune said probably had a trap to it, unlocking the small lock on the door and sliding it open, handing the key to this door along with a front door key to Naruto, should he ever choose to actually use the lock. Walking into the hallway, there were three doors, one on either side and at the end. "That last one should be to the roof…" Shizune said, turning to the door on the left. "This should be the master bedroom, and the other was Yondaime-sama's private study…"

Unlocking the room to the left, Shizune swung the door open, revealing what was easily the biggest bed Naruto had ever seen. "Whoa…" The blonde muttered. The room was extremely simplistic compared to the rest of what he'd seen of the house. Not a single painting or expensive vase in sight… Just a wardrobe, shelves and tables with a few pictures in frames scattered about, along with the massive bed up against the center of the far wall. "Where do those doors go?" Naruto asked, indicating two doors on the right wall.

"Those should be the closet and bathroom…" Shizune said, standing in front of them. The door to the right was a sliding door, obviously the closet, while the left was a 'western' hinged door, like the door to the bedroom. Sliding the closet door open, Shizune stepped back and openly gaped at what she saw; five Jounin outfits, two formal men's kimono, two rather bland looking orange and red yukata, and a spare set of Hokage robes.

"So this really was his house…" Naruto muttered, picking up the Hokage headdress that was leaned against the wall under the robes.

"He sure liked to be prepared for anything, didn't he?" Shizune asked shyly, pulling open one of the drawers and doors of the wardrobe in the room. "It looks like he kept all his informal and non-mission clothing in here… aside from those yukata…" Of course the yukata wouldn't really fit in here…

Naruto opened the door to the bathroom, poked his head inside, backed away and shut the door again. It wasn't much more than a normal bathroom, but it was still pretty big, but what he could barely stand was the ethereal glow everything in there seemed to give off… Shizune opened the door herself and muttered, "Maybe I do want this room…"

"Kaachan, come on… let's finish looking around and go get your stuff." Naruto said, breaking her from her reverie.

They crossed the hall, Shizune unlocking the door to the study. It took Naruto a moment to register the fact that he hadn't just walked into a library. The entire room was lined with shelves filled with books, save the space in the corner to their right that held a desk riddled with paper, ink, and other writing utensils, and a door to their left. "Well, now we know we'll never run out of reading material…" Shizune muttered. "That door leads to Yondaime-sama's 'jutsu vault', but I doubt you'd have any need to get in there, being a civilian now and all. Plus I'm pretty sure there's a blood seal, so only Yondaime-sama and his blood relatives could get in…" You wouldn't have any trouble though, Naruto-kun… Walking over to the desk, she picked up a small orange book and examined its cover. After a moment, she shrieked, dropped the book, and yelled; "OH NO! YONDAIME-SAMA WAS A PERVERT!!!"

Naruto walked over and picked up the book, opening it to the publishing page. "Icha Icha; First Edition…" Naruto read, before he started chuckling. "So, Yondaime got the first printed copy, eh?" I wonder if Kakashi-sensei would like this… He thought, setting it back down on the desk. "We can go through the books later, let's check out the rest of the house…"

Shizune nodded, still slightly hyperventilating as she led Naruto out of the study. "Hey, what's that door?" Naruto asked.

"That leads to the roof, I think…" Shizune answered, walking over to the door to find it unlocked. "That's odd…"

Opening the door, she was faced with a small room about the size of an average closet, with a large iron door on the other side, and another wooden door to the left. As Shizune tried to open the iron door, which had an peculiar locking mechanism for its equally strange lever-latch handle, Naruto made his way to the other door, which lacking a lock, opened easily. "Wow… he really did overdo everything, didn't he?" Naruto asked with a hint of sarcasm in his voice as he stared down what amounted to a small armory.

"I… think he had this here in case he needed to leave in a hurry…" Shizune muttered as she looked over his shoulder at full kunai pouches, shuriken holsters, and small first-aid kits; about a dozen of each. Along the left wall hung five spare Jounin vests, and under them were lined dozens of scrolls of incrementally varying size on small shelves. There were three of each of the clearly labeled scrolls, varying from things like 'Fire Sealing Scroll' to 'Multiple Enemy Paralysis Scroll' or 'Explosive Scroll' and things neither Naruto nor Shizune could recognize. They did note a few standard cargo scrolls labeled with things like 'spare rations' or 'drinking water' as well. It was true… the Yondaime held to the old proverb 'better over-prepared than under-prepared' almost religiously. On the right wall were wall-mounted shelves lined with things like bandages, outdated communications equipment, even two spare Konoha Hitai-ite, and strangely, a katana and two ANBU swords lined up under them. The most peculiar items were a small rack of ten three-pronged kunai, with two pouches labeled to contain more of the same under them. Then Shizune noticed there were two of these odd kunai missing from the rack, apparent by their open, unused spaces. This led her to look around the room once more and take note that there was one of everything missing, aside from the swords and scrolls. She let out a silent, morbid chuckle. "So, he left to fight the Kyuubi, and no one bothered to put everything back…" She said, tears forming in her eyes.

Naruto looked up at her and examined the room again himself. "Hn… I guess not…" Naruto muttered, walking back out into the hallway and starting down the stairs.

Shizune watched as her son stalked away in a mix of rage and depression, and felt the tears streaming down her cheeks. Maybe he wouldn't be so angry or sad… if he knew Yondaime-sama was his father… she thought, wiping away her tears and jogging to catch up to the blonde.

Following her son downstairs to the open hall, Shizune watched as he walked through the large archway into the dining room, which was made to comfortably seat at least ten people, more if need be… Above the low-lying table around which were situated several sitting pillows was a fairly good-sized chandelier made from what looked like sky-blue crystal. It was 'fairly good sized' by the standard that it would be utterly huge back in his tiny apartment, but in this large room, it looked rather small… There were several nigh-identical potted plants around the room, or rather, one in each corner, while a small pile of spare pillows for extra guests were neatly stacked just to the right of the entrance to the room, next to what looked like an overgrown bonsai tree. Aside from the plants and the chandelier, though, the room looked rather bland with its plain dark-orange painted walls… Shizune assumed this was to keep the family and friends dining together focused on each other, and encouraging conversation.

After taking in his fill of the room, Naruto stepped through the only doorway in the room other than the main arch they entered from. This led to the kitchen, which was large by house standards, but surprisingly smaller than most mansions have; some of which, like the Hyuuga's, even rivaled those of restaurants. This room had two other doors, one obviously leading to the pantry, and Naruto led Shizune through the other on the left wall, into the laundry room. It was rather… standard. Reminding Naruto of the laundry room back at his apartment building, actually… it had shelves with white towels, and a washer/dryer set, as well as a small utility closet containing the cleaning supplies and various spare hygiene products for the place. This room too, had a pair of doors, a sliding door on the far side which Naruto opened to confirm that it was the other door in the entrance hall, and another opposite the washer and dryer, through a short hallway.

This other door, led out back… to the path leading to the familial bath. "We have our own onsen?" Naruto asked after opening the western-style door.

"Apparently…" Shizune said, walking down the path toward it to investigate as Naruto stepped onto the lawn. There was only one word that could describe this place…

Green…

Everything, everywhere, was green. The tightly packed trees surrounding the property were covered in moss, the lawn looked to be well-kept, and the flower bed was overrun with weeds. Even the paint for the house was a deep forest green… strangely, the first thing that popped into Naruto's mind when he saw it (Well, third… the first was how he couldn't believe how green this place was, and the second wondering how a certain pair of green-clad freaks would react to seeing it) was how he would've given almost anything to have a backyard like this to play in while he was growing up, which led him to think of children of his own, which in turn led to his face shifting to a deep crimson.

"Naruto!" Shizune called after exiting the small bath house. "I love this place!!!"

This caused Naruto to give off a half-hearted chuckle… "Yeah, I do too." He answered. "Come on, Okaa-chan, let's go get your stuff…"

I'd like to say now that despite this being a NaruHarem, said harem is not up for discussion. I've already picked out the girls, and any new additions past those will be my decision.

Tomorrow marks Naruto's first day of civilian work at none other than the Ichiraku!

I don't like the fact that I never made my 4K word mark, but it's damn close at 3.4K…

Another thing; pretty soon I plan on putting up a thread on a forum board I help administrate regarding update status of -and discussion regarding- my fics. You'll find the link to the forum in my profile under 'my homepage', as well as where to find the topic ON said forum. The stuff about my fics is only ONE thread. The rest of it is an RP/anything else site.