Before gaining attention Sinedd felt his life to be null and void of anything constructive . Every day was a meaningless existence with no comforts to make the orphan feel human or fulfilled. An affectionate voice telling him that he was wanted is what he really needed, but life rarely gives you what you need even more so what you deserve or want. Confused by the powers that be about what is wrong with him that was how Sinedd had lived.
But one he had a purpose now a dark and nasty one To make those that life smiled upon and blessed with happiness feel incomplete. To cause minor problems for those who had none. He wasn't a nasty person but good nature can only outlast the way one is nurtured for so long. Anything.
Sinedd live in a world where he would get attention by any means , malice , bullying
As if someone was out to get him.
He had started to live a menacing life opting to do things that earned disapproval , it was so easy to be hated compared to being loved and all he needed was a way to be noticed. All he wanted in life was to have people know he was there .
Paranoia had become a dominant t trait as result and only made him his fragile shards of kindness even less prominent . Soon darkness would engulf his heart completely.
Sinedd treated Shadows as if they enjoyed to conspire like government mps to overthrow him .The matron hated him now and the other orphaned children feared him or loathed his presence. Perhaps a Bitter atmosphere but at least people noticed him now.
So what if he wasn't liked? He had no friends from the start of his pitiful life , if sins would at least make him noticed and not some invisible doll then he would happily take on the label of troubled and delinquent. He would relish in the negative attention , it was all he had to find a purpose. His calling, his drug was trouble. And his life had prescribed him a overdose of it.
500.
Strawberry gashes healed slowly , cut on the fragile boys pale thin flesh. Coping with the Attention , which was all that he wanted had lead to consequences.
Sinedds first foul was he had started to harm himself , no one else would comfort him and his conscience made him feel ill. But the thrill of being able to punish himself was something he and he alone knew.
He would cut deep into his flesh and started to get really good at hiding the marks , not that he needed too .
No one would actually show him any concern. Smoking made him feel like shit but he loved how the stale lingering odour irritated those around him and getting beat up made him feel so privileged.
The matron started to call him a demon child.
Sinedd decided he would fulfil her expectations , he didn't want to let her down and lose all his hard earned attention. Again parents were arriving , Sinedd saw them like vultures that hunted for the least damaged child.
Sinedds messy black hair hadn't been combed and he wore a baggy black jumper and a pair of tattered worn jeans.
Waiting for people to arrive and a few nasty glances he folded up his sleeves revealing his scars , his punishments. The matrons eyes opened wide he knew that she would be frantic and he would get a good lashing for his display of gruesome scars.
He knew each scar , inflicted by himself and her.
The matron stormed past the kids and Sinedd licked his lips he was priority .
To be continued .