Disclaimer: I don't own any person, place or thing in this fic. I'm still working on that petition to change that.

Flashbacks- /italics/

Summary: Hunter has a problem. Someone's done the unthinkable and stolen his sledgehammer. Will he find who stole it? Or will he be forced to...*gasp* start using a new weapon?

Jeff glared evilly at his brother, "I did it? What the hell do you mean by I did it?!"

"I could ask you the same thing! You were the one that wanted the hammer. I had nothing to do with it!" Matt exclaimed.

"Stop lying!" Jeff shouted as he pushed Matt onto the floor. "You were the one who told me my sculpture needed something and then you told me to go steal Hunter's hammer because that would be the best thing for it!"

Matt got up and pushed Jeff back, "I've seen the way you've been looking at sledgy these last couple of weeks. You've just been itching to get your hands on him and now you're trying to blame me for what you did!"

"For what I did?!" Jeff was now so into Matt's face they were nose to nose. "You were the one that volunteered to get sledgy for me because you said that if I tried to get it Hunter would have caught me before I even got to his dressing room door!"

"Ha!" Matt grinned. "So you admit it!"

Jeff growled, "Admit this!" And with that he tackled his older brother to the ground with a barrage of punches and kicks. The remaining superstars stared at the two brothers in amusement as they watched them rolling around on the floor beating the hell out of each other.

Finally Hunter became fed up with the brothers and shouted, "Will you two quit it already?! You two can kill each other on your own time, but right now you two need to give me a good reason not to strangle you for kidnapping sledgy!"

Matt froze mid hair pull and looked up at Hunter angrily, "How many times do I have to tell you?! Jeff did it! I'm innocent!"

A kick to the groin shut Matt up as Jeff rolled away to the other side of the room. "Some brother you are, laying the blame on your little brother like that. You've stooped to a new low Matty."

Hunter started to growl, his hands making swinging motions like he was still holding sledgy. Everyone took notice of this and took a few steps back. Shawn laughed nervously. "Guys, I really think you should tell your story before Hunter goes completely insane."

Jeff pouted and glared over at Matt, "Fine! Only because I don't want to be hit with whatever Hunter uses as a replacement for sledgy." He cleared his throat. "Now last night was the end of my six month suspension of working on my art backstage. After I tried to make a full body replica of Dave and he ended up encased in plaster one night, Vince said I couldn't bring anymore of my projects backstage, so last night I was working on my new sculpture when John ran into our dressing room..."

"So Matt, What do you think of this color?" Jeff held up a bowl of extremely bright red paint. "I want to make sure this statue will stand out.

Matt kept reading his magazine, "Jeff any color is fine. You do your best work when its random. Besides what...?!" The sound of a door slamming made Jeff jump and anything else he was going to say was cut off with the realization that he was now covered in his brother's paint.

John leaned against the door, out of breath and clutching a bag to his chest. "Damn that was a close one! Hunter almost got me."

Matt spluttered as he tried to shake off the paint, "John! What the hell are you doing in here? And why are you carrying sledgy's case?"

He looked around and suddenly noticed that he wasn't alone in the room. He gave Matt the once over and nodded. "Red is a good color on you man, maybe you should start wrestling like that. It really works for you."

"Shut up Cena and answer my question."

"I'm afraid I can't do that oh guru of mattitude." John opened the door again and made sure the coast was clear. "But if Hunter or Shawn comes by here, you haven't seen me since this morning." He slipped out the door. "Also if Rey, Punk, or Dave come by here tell them that we weren't doing an exorcism on Hunter's hammer." This time he took off running. "Later!"

Matt just shook his head, "We work with some of the strangest people, don't we Jeff?" He paused when his brother didn't answer. "Jeff?" When he turned he saw Jeff staring back at him with a bucket of water and a pout on his face. "What's the matter with you?"

Jeff continued to pout. "John made me waste all of my paint that I spent so much time mixing up today. Since all of it fell on you and it's dry now, I figured if I dumped this water on you I could finish painting my statue!"

The elder Hardy brother started inching toward the showers. "Maybe you should paint it later." he said nervously. "Right now you should think about what you could add on to your sculpture." A sudden though crossed Matt's mind. "Why don't you grab Hunter's hammer. I'm sure he won't mind once he sees what you'll do with it!"

Jeff eyes lit up at the suggestion. He'd always wanted to use sledgy in some of his work but Hunter would never let him do it. "Really?! You think he would?"

Matt grinned. "I'm sure of it! You can use can use sledgy for the head of your statue, and I bet if you leave right now you'll be able to get it before he comes back for it for his match."

"Great idea!" Jeff hugged Matt tightly before bouncing out the door. A few seconds later he bounced back and stuck his head through the door. "John's right. You really should start wrestling like that." His only answer was Matt throwing the empty paint bucket at his head.

"This is why there needs to be a nationwide ban on skittles. I would not be soaked in paint right now if my dumbass brother wasn't on his fifth sugar high of the day!" Matt continued to grumble as he walked to the showers. "At least telling him to go get sledgy should occupy him for a while and I can finally get some good R and R!"

"See!" Jeff shouted. "I told you it was Matt's idea to steal sledgy! I was just an innocent pawn in his diabolical and evil plan to get me to leave him alone." Everyone looked at him quizzically. "What?"

"Jeff, when did you learn to use words like pawn and diabolical?" Morrison asked.

The younger Hardy just rolled his eyes. "Just because I spend the majority of my time figuring out how to take over the skittles company and then use their power to take over the world, doesn't mean I don't know how to expand my vocabulary."

"Let me guess, your TV broke and all you could get was educational television?"

Jeff nodded, "Basically. I learned those two words in the first five minutes and fell asleep. TV had never made me yawn so much before."

Matt snorted from his place on the ground. "Fine! I may have been the one that brought it up, but he was the one who actually went to steal it. After everything I've heard about sledgy, do you really think I would try to take it? That would take someone crazy. Someone like...Jeff!" He said as he pointed to his brother.

"You're such a traitor Matty! Maybe the evil Matt storyline had some truth in it after all. Maybe you are looking for a way to get rid of me. That's the only possible reason for you to send me after sledgy!" he shouted hysterically.

"Jeff," Matt said calmly. "You just admitted to trying to figure out a way to take over the world with skittles. If there is a crazy one here its definitely you."

Before Jeff could answer, Taker interrupted, "Jimmy legs does have a point. Well what do you have to say for yourself?"

"All right." Matt said as he got up from the floor. "This is what really happened. After Jeff took off to go steal sledgy, I sat in our dressing room for a while and waited for him to come back. I didn't think he would actually go and try it, but this was Jeff and he had consumed sugar, so I had knew I had to go catch him..."

Matt looked up from his magazine for the fiftieth time, expecting see Jeff come bouncing through the door. "Damn it! I can't believe he actually went to steal sledgy. I always knew one day he would come up with an idea that would get him pedigreed. " He went over to the door and looked through it cautiously. Luckily for him, there was no sign of anyone in the hall. He sighed. "I can't believe I'm about to do this."

He tiptoed down the hall, moving as quietly as he could to DX's locker room. It was only a few doors down, but having to look over his shoulder every five seconds really slowed him down. Matt made sure no one was coming again before quickly running inside and slamming the door behind him. "Jeff you idiot! Don't you ever try..."

"Don't ever try what?"

Matt turned around slowly and saw the one person he was trying to avoid. "H-Hunter! What are you doing in here?"

"It is my dressing room, or did you not see the green spray paint on the door?"

"I-I saw it." he stuttered back."Umm...have you seen Jeff anywhere? He finally convinced me to play a game with him and he disappeared. I thought I saw him run this way."

Hunter looked around the room, "Well as you can see there is obviously no one in here

but me, so if you don't mind." Hunter said as he started pushing Matt toward the door. "I have to get ready for my match...AND YOU'RE INTERUPTING ME!" He tried to slam the door behind Matt, but he slipped back in the room. Hunter just shook his head, "I'm already tagging with one of the most hyper people in the WWE, can't I just get a five minute break?"

Matt just looked back at him disbelievingly, "My brother is THE most hyper person in the WWE and you don't see me complaining do you?"

"So the shouting you were doing earlier wasn't complaining?"

Matt was about to answer when he saw a set feet just barely sticking out of one of the half closed lockers in the room, "Shawn did stop hiding in the lockers to try and scare you right?"

Hunter started to turn around, "No. Now he only does it around Halloween now. Why?"

Matt jumped in front of him so he wouldn't see Jeff, "N-no reason." He tried to put on his best innocent face. "So can I stay in here in case Jeff comes back?"

"NO! Besides why would he come in here?"

"He's Jeff. Who knows why he does half the things he does?

Hunter nodded thoughtfully. "You do have a point Hardy." He sighed and walked out the door, "Fine. You can stay, but only because I don't want Jeff to wreck the room. Shawn almost killed me the last time he was in here."

As soon as the door closed Matt let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. "Jeff! Get your rainbow haired behind out of that locker right now!"

Pouting, Jeff stepped out of the locker with sledgy in his hands. "You didn't have to yell Matty."

"I'm not even close to yelling yet. Now put sledgy down before Hunter or Shawn..." Matt trailed off as he looked up at his brother. "Oh my god! Jeff what the hell happened to your hair?!"

Jeff looked at him confusedly, "What do you mean? There's nothing wrong with my hair."

Matt took hold of Jeff's arm and led him over to a mirror, "I'm telling you now, brace yourself."

"What are you talking about? I look completely..."NORMAL!" When he looked into the mirror he released a scream of pure terror which shattered the mirror, caused Hunter's water bottles to explode, and dented a steel chair. His normally rainbow colored hair was now completely back to its natural blonde, it was like he had never dyed his hair a day in his life. Even his roots were completely blonde.

Matt looked around at the destruction and chuckled, "Now that's what I call talent."

Jeff turned on brother and slapped him in the head. "This is no time for jokes! My completely awesome hair has been made one solid color! What am I gonna do?"I can't go out looking like this!"

Matt tried to pacify his brother. "Easy there Jeffro. We can always re-dye your hair. It's not that big of a deal."

"I guess your right. It's only my hair." He shivered. "Why is it so cold in here? I know Hunter likes cold water but this is ridiculous...Matt why do you keep staring at me like that? Does my hair really look that bad?"

Matt shook his head vigorously. "Jeff, I'm really thinking that we should just leave sledgy and get out of here."

"I don't care if Hunter's hammer is cursed or not. I'm using it for my statue!"

"Well then bro, you might want to take a look in the mirror again."

Jeff looked back at the mirror and screamed again. "What the hell is happening to me?!"

This time, his arm bands were completely white and didn't have any holes in them and his face paint was nonexistent. He quickly found out that the reason he was so cold was that his regular ring attire had been replaced by a black t-shirt, some plain black trunks, but he still had his regular boots. Basically, he looked like a blonde version of CM Punk.

"Why?!" He screamed, shaking the hammer into the air. "What did I do to deserve this!"

Matt stopped telling the story when he heard Jeff sniffle, "Come on bro. You know it wasn't that bad. You're back to normal now anyway."

"That's not the point!" Jeff cried. "You just don't understand! It wasn't the fact that my hair lost its color, or that my completely kick ass sense of style had disappeared. It's the fact I couldn't eat any skittles! I had...I had lost complete interest in them!" At this he broke down sobbing, and a chorus of gasps echoed throughout the room.

"I really don't believe it." Randy said in awe. "I never knew anything that could pull Jeff away from skittles."

"Out of all the stories I've heard today, this one definitely has to be the weirdest. Hunter said, trying to drown out Jeff's sobs. "Now can we please get to why I shouldn't believe you two still have sledgy?"

"All right. Well I couldn't convince him to leave sledgy behind so I figured we take him with us and then I would bring him back later. That's when things just got worse..."

"Jeff! Why don't you just get rid of that thing? Don't you see what its doing to you!"

Jeff just shook his head as he finished setting sledgy on his statue. "I told you I would take a few pictures of sledgy with my statue before I have it back to Hunter. Just give me a couple of minutes." He put the finishing touches on his sculpture before stepping back to admire it. "There! I think this is my greatest piece yet, and to celebrate..."

He picked up the special bowl of skittles he kept for whenever he finished a project and started to reach his hand in, but it kept freezing.

Matt sighed irritably, "What are you doing Jeff? Go ahead and celebrate so we can get rid of that hammer."

Jeff set the bowl down so he could use his other hand to force its way in. "I don't know what's wrong. It's like my body is refusing to let me have any skittles! My mind and body don't want to do what I say. Matt help me!"

Matt thought it over. He had a choice between putting and end to his brother's main source of sugar or helping him get his skittle fix. He kept thinking and realized that if he didn't help him. Jeff wouldn't stop whining until he did. "Let me try." He grabbed a handful of skittles and tried to feed them to Jeff, but it was like a force field was surrounding his mouth. "What's going on?!"

"I don't know! I need my skittles Matty! I can't live without them. What am I going to do for food?!"

"It's that damn hammer Jeff! Go give it back to Hunter now!"

"Let me get my pictures first!" Jeff grabbed his camera, but as soon as he pressed the button to take the picture his camera suddenly exploded. "What the hell?!" He dropped the camera and began to stomp on it to put out the fire. "I've never seen a camera explode like that before...cool!"

It seemed the like explosion of his camera made Jeff completely forget about what was happening. Of course since they were brothers, Matt was completely used to this. Cool? Cool! This is a sign Jeff! You usually listen to signs!"

"So what is this a sign of?"

"That this hammer is gonna kill us if you don't give it back to Hunter!"

"Oh please." Jeff waved off his brother. "What's the worst that could possibly happen?" As soon as he said that he smelt smoke. When he turned around, he saw that his newly completed statue had also burst into flames. "Oh shit!" He grabbed the fire extinguisher Shawn had bought him after he made him a flaming model of Texas for his birthday that nearly caught the arena on fire. "I've been working on that thing for months!"

"See!" Matt finally lost it and grabbed Jeff by the throat and began shaking him. "Are you gonna listen to me now?! GIVE THAT DAMN HAMMER BACK TO HUNTER BEFORE WE END UP BURNED TO A CRISP!"

"There's only...one...problem with... that." Jeff choked out.

"What?!"

"Sledgy is attached to my statue."

Matt whipped his head around to the still burning statue and could faintly see the outline of the sledgehammer. "Oh damn it!" He raced around the room looking for anything to put out the fire. He grabbed a bucket of ice that still had a few bottles of water in it and threw it into the fire, but all that did was make the fire flare up. "This isn't good." He glanced over at Jeff. "Get off your ass and help me!"

Jeff was still staring in the flames hypnotically and wasn't listening. "I'll help you in a second Matt." Of course when he was hit in the head with his empty paint bucket he had no choice but to get up. "That hurt!"

"I'll show something that hurts if you don't help me put out this fire!" Matt shouted as he tried to smother the flames with the towel he found. Since he was trying to save sledgy, the elder Hardy ignored the constant tapping on his shoulder. Well at least until the towel he was hitting the flames with, went up in smoke too. He turned to his brother, "What the hell do you want Jeff?!"

Jeff held out the small fire extinguisher he found. "The flames might go out a lot faster if you use this, but before you put them out, can I sketch them first?" He asked innocently.

Matt just stared it him before turning back to the fire and putting it out with the extinguisher. He panted as he saw the remains of Jeff's once six foot statue, which was nothing but ash. "I don't believe this." he said as he dropped back on to the couch. "What are we gonna tell Hunter?" He dropped his head into his hands and sighed. "We are so dead."

Once again there was another irritating poking at his shoulder. "What is it now Jeff?""

"Can I sketch sledgy before we have to give him back? I lost all of my other work, so I would like to have something to show for it."

"Jeff what are you talking about? Sledgy is completely...! What the hell are you doing with that?!" In his hands, Jeff held the completely unchared sledgy. It even looked a little more cleaner than it did before the fire.

"I dug it out of the ashes, so can I sketch it?"

Matt's eyebrow twitched and silently grabbed sledgy from Jeff and started dragging him down the hall. He calmly stopped in front of the green spray painted door and went inside. He dropped sledgy back in his case and started dragging Jeff back to their dressing room. "As soon as the show is over, I'm flushing your skittles and telling Vince to ban you from bringing any of your art work backstage."

"...Which is exactly what I did after I brought him back. If you really think that after what happened I would leave him alone to try that again. You must really be out of your mind Hunter."

"So did you learn anything after you kidnapped Hunter's hammer?" Shawn asked.

Jeff raised his hand and nodded, "I learned that using a towel to smother fire only works when you completely cover the fire. I also learned that the number one method of cleaning a sledgehammer is to surround it with things that will catch on fire, let it burn, and then clean the ashes from it."

Hunter nodded. "So that's why sledgy was so nice and clean when I got him for that match last night. Thanks a lot Hardy. At least your story did help me in some way. By the way, while all of this was going on you didn't see or hear anyone mention sledgy did you?"

Matt thought about it for a moment. "Actually I did. When I was dragging Jeff back to flush his skittles, I heard Miz telling Morrison about how they wanted revenge for how you humiliated them a few months ago on Raw. He said the way to cement their status as the number one tag team of the twenty first century would be taking something from the greatest tag team of the twentieth century.

Jeff was still glaring Matt while he talked to Hunter. "I only wanted to use sledgy for my work. You didn't have to flush my skittles because of it!"

"Shut up Jeff! At least I told the truth and didn't try to pin something on my brother!"

"What?! You said the whole thing was my idea!"

"It was your idea!"

While the Hardys continued to continued to argue, he turned to the Miz and Morrison. "Now! You two are the only suspects left! This means you had to have taken sledgy. You tell me where he is and I won't make your punishment too harsh!" Hunter said evilly.

The two A-listers looked at each other and laughed. They took one glance and Hunter and started to laugh even harder. All this did was piss Hunter off even more. "Just what the hell is so funny, you two?!"

They suddenly stopped laughing and turned to Hunter. Then in all seriousness both of them said, "We have no use for sledgehammers at the Palace of Wisdom."