It wasn't that I didn't like the Cullens', of course not; they took me in and gave me a home! It was just that they were all rather … intimidating, especially because I didn't know all of them so well.
We all sat around their large dining room table silently. If I was to say this experience was awkward, it would be an understatement.
Then, Alice cleared her throat and started rambling on about parties and shopping and anything else she could think of, just to fill the dead air that was occupying the room.
As I moved the food that looked absolutely delicious around my plate I felt eyes on me. I took a swift glance around the table, and my eyes were caught by Edward's for a split second and the blush that I hadn't felt in days rushed to my cheeks and I instantly looked back down at the plate.
Diner went on like that for a half hour Alice chatting Esme giving the occasional response to make it seem like a conversation was going on, Rosalie snorting at some of the ridiculous things Alice said and Edward staring at me for a couple of minutes at a time.
We all helped clear the table and clean the kitchen up and went to our separate rooms. Except for Alice, she came to my room. It felt off calling the space that Alice and Esme cleared out for me mine, and it pulled the suppressed feelings and memories of the fire and my father to the front of my brain, just for me to push them back again.
"So I think we'll be going shopping tomorrow, We'll get you a whole new wardrobe and makeup!" Alice chirped excitedly.
"No, Alice I'll just go to Target and buy myself some jeans and tee shirts, I've already overstayed my visit…" I trailed off, She gave me a look of confusion.
"Bella, what do you mean visit? You're staying here…" she said softly. I couldn't think straight from that point on, staying? I feel bad enough occupying Edward's piano room already and now they want me to stay?
Eventually Alice Left to go see Jasper and I got myself ready for bed.
I crawled under the covers of the queen sized bed and relished in the silk sheets. As I lay there I noticed, in the back corner of the room, there was an old record player and 2 tall piles of records.
I got up out of the bed and sat on the wood floor near the old records and player; clad in my grey holey sweat pants and my navy blue sweatshirt.
The first record on the top of the first pile was composure of classical pieces, some soft and lovely and others fast and boisterous. The next record titled Musique de L'ange Aimant. I played it and it sounded like warmth and comfort.
I crawled back into the bed and listened as I thought about how lucky I was to have people like the Cullens', then I shut my eyes and sleep finally took me.
I woke to Alice, straddling me and holding my face in a way that she said was a 'good plucking angle' as she ruthlessly plucked stray hairs from my eyebrows, which she said were getting long enough to braid.
Then she told me to get into the shower and shed have an outfit read for me when I got out.
So I did what the little pixie said and got my ass in the shower, afraid of any punishment that I would get if I didn't listen to her.
And surely enough she had some fashionable outfit laid out on my bed.
Black leggings with a grey floral shirt and a black cardigan, I was actually impressed that I liked the outfit because I usually didn't opt for the girly style.
She disappeared into Rose's room, which honestly I was too scared to go into, and emerged with Rosalie in toe and lead me to her car, a little yellow Porsche, and then I thought about my car.
"Alice… I can't go shopping I need to get my car" I uttered.
"I don't think I can let you go back to your house Bell, it's kind of… In ruins…" she hesitated.
"Can you- would you pick it up and bring it back here for me please?" I was on the verge of tears and I didn't want them to know, but my voice sold me out.
"Sure thing sweetie, why don't you just, uh, go back up to your room?" She sounded unsure of herself, and it was like Rose was almost invisible in the back seat she was so quiet.
I got out of Alice's conspicuous vehicle and ran upstairs with tears threatening to spill over my eyelids.
Why Alice's car triggered memories in me- I don't know, but I hated it, and I just wanted it to stop. It was painful, the feeling that something is missing.
I clutched at my chest and I crawled back into bed, rocking out sobs and sinking back into my original cycle of crying and sleeping.
The next time I woke, I had on flannel pajama pants that were too big and a grey tee shirt, my hair was in a bun atop my head and my eyes felt uncomfortably swollen. I walked into the hallway bathroom, praying that no one would see me.
Just my luck, Edward and Emmett rounded the corner and stopped in their tracks at the sight of me holding the waistband of the too-big flannels so that they wouldn't fall down and rubbing my overly puffy eyelids
"Uh, sorry" I whispered to them, not realizing how soar my throat was and scurrying into the bathroom. My eyes were ferociously red and augmented.
There was two short knocks on the door.
I opened it and cleared my throat.
"Hi" I whispered.
"Are you alright?" Edward said with a genuine worry in his eyes, he reached out and gently traced his index finger around my eyes, and I shivered.
"I'm fine, thanks" I muttered before pushing past him and the door. He grabbed my wrist before I could escape to my room.
"You might want to turn off the record player at night, wouldn't want to damage the records, and I hope you like the outfits, it's really all I had that I thought was comfortable enough." He whispered and I thanked God that Emmett wasn't there because the look on my face would probably make him think I was the biggest retard on the face of the earth.
Why the sudden intimacy? I was shocked on every level. Edward Cullen had never spoken to me in my life, and now this encounter.
Then it hit me. He changed my clothes. Which means- he saw me in my underwear. It felt juvenile to freak out over this sort of thing, but I just couldn't help it, my cheeks were so hot I could feel a permanent redness coming on.
I went into the corner and sat on the floor like I did the night before, just sitting and listening. I played Musique de L'ange Aimant from the beginning but heard this odd echoing noise going along with it. After the first song was done I realized it was Edward playing piano to the record. I left it playing and tip toed over to the door that connected our two rooms and pressed my ear against it.
It was definitely him.
I twisted the gold colored doorknob and opened the door a slit. I looked through the tiny opening and saw him sitting in the dark burgundy room intently hitting the keys, a tuft of his bronze hair falling to his forehead. The song slowed as did he and he looked my way and motioned for me to come in.
I hesitated but made my way to the piano bench, sitting next to him. He finished out the song.
"I'm sorry I took your piano room." I stated softly.
"It's okay, the acoustics are better in here anyway."
It was silent for what seemed like days.
"I'm so sorry Bella." I knew he was talking about the fire and I broke down.
I bit my bottom lip and let the tears run.
"It hurts so bad" I leaned into him and he retaliated, wrapping his arms around me and letting me cry.
I felt this tinge in my heart as I cried.
Did i have a crush on Edward Cullen?
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Sorry there was no authors note last chapter.
This goes to Jazzy's Mistress for following all my stories and leaving me nice reviews!
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