"Mommy is not exactly dead…" Booth shook the woman in his arms, "Right Bren?"
"But dad… she's green. Oh… oh… she's an alien… and that means I am one too!" Joy beamed, twirling around in circles at the revelation.
"She's just…" Booth placed his hand on Brennan's neck to check her pause, "She just needs some rest. Why don't you go play in your room for a bit and I will call you when the pizza gets here. Okay, sweetie?"
"But daddy…" Joy pleaded, her brown orbs twinkling in the soft lighting.
"If you're good, later we will get some ice cream with mommy. How does that sound?"
"Sundae and sprinkles… and marshmallows… and… and…" The girl beamed, caught up in the sugary future.
"Yes, yes." He interrupted as the woman in his arms lightly murmured, "You have to be good though."
"Okay daddy." Joy giggled, running down the hall and barreling into her room.
As soon as the door shut, Booth turned his attention to the fragile woman in his arms. In the few short years she had shattered. The deep set eyes, the cold heart shattering stare of hers… even the grin she had reserved solely for him had seemed to fade into the wind, leaving behind a mask of pain and self loathing.
"Come on Bones… you gotta wake up…" He pathetically pleaded as he looked down at the shell of the woman he once knew, unable to keep the fear from dripping from word, "Just look at me… please…"
Her body jerked at his touch, refusing to wake from her almost perfect dream of a love once lost. As soon as her eyes opened, she knew she would be hit with the reality that he was never really hers.
"Joy needs you." His voice cracked and in that instant his emotional wall shattered and the words just kept flowing, "Babe… please. I cannot do this alone anymore. She needs a mother and a father… a family unit… most importantly, I need you."
Lightly stroking her check he smiled as her dazed eyes fluttered opened at the admission. A small smile formed around her lips but soon faded as her eyes dropped, trying to mask the pain running through her veins.
"There you are." He locked his gaze on her, "What was that all about?"
"No-nothing" She stuttered, trying to break free from his grasp, "I shouldn't have came. This was a mistake."
And there it was, he needed her. After all she had done, all the heartbreak she had caused and he still needed her. It was written all over his face and that pain was just something she could not take. He was supposed to be over her, happy and have moved on. Not in the same tortured fate she had found herself in, the one she had caused.
Heartbreak, party of two.
What if they gave it another try and it didn't work out? Or worse, what if he left her? Living life from the outside looking in was something Brennan had become accustomed to, practically an expert, and letting someone in… giving him another chance to shatter her world into a thousand of pieces, that was a risk that she knew could kill her.
Their eyes locked, in a fight of wills as they both willed the years of pain and regret on the other. Both letting their glares open wounds they had once closed off to the world, nursing a pain that only the other could truly understand. Two fateful lovers too stubborn to be the one to give in and admit defeat. A give and take that had worked so perfectly, almost too perfectly until the day they broke… causing a time shift and fate to change forever.
"You… you just don't understand." She whispered and the vulnerably of her voice practically shattered his heart.
"Understand what?" He asked on a broken sob.
"What this means to me." Her voice was raw and rough, "What you did to me. What we did to each other. All those late nights… those…" Her voice broke as she shook, "No one… no one."
"But babe…" His voice rasped, unable to keep his love from falling to the forefront of his bottleneck emotions, "I have always been here. Always."
With a slight nod she stood, knowing she had already broken the man beyond what she even knew she was capable of. Was their love even fixable anymore?
"Here," She frowned, picking up an item from her purse and tossing it in her former partner's direction, "maybe you will have better luck with these then I did."
"Bones… these are a heavy sedative." Booth angrily shook the pill bottle in his former partner's direction. "What in the world are you doing with these stupid things?"
"If you would have just listened to me…" Her eyes lightly flicked up but soon fell, "they were prescribed a few months back. My name is clearly affixed on the label if you don't believe me. But as I stated, they are utterly useless for my ailment." Because I am dying of a broken heart she thought but left the words silent.
He glanced down, running his hand over white label. How had things gone so horribly wrong that she had needed a sedative to just live? If that is what you would call it. From the way he saw it, she hadn't lived… truly lived for years. She just waited for death to take her swiftly or slowly. It didn't matter to her anymore.
"The Temperance Brennan I knew lived life to the fullest. She didn't need stupid pills just to get through the day."
"Well, that woman is dead." She glared, "She died five years ago with a change of the locks and a silent goodbye."
"And whose fault is that?" He bitterly hissed. "Who is the one who decided to just get up one day and leave her family? Whose damn fault is that, Temperance?"
Her eyes narrowed at her former partner, attempting to glare him into oblivion. You. You. It is all you, her heart screamed but her mouth stayed silent. After all he had done for their daughter; the guilt of the truth was not what he deserved. The truth would be something she would take to her grave; at least there she knew it would do no more damage.
"The queen of compartmentalizing has finally broke." He lightly chuckled, "I never thought I would see the day that you didn't have a snide retort."
"Oh I know, I know all about breaking now." The words slowly spilled, "My world shattered the day I left this apartment." Her words were cold and dark, not the slightest hint of the happy woman he once knew.
At the slight knock on the door, Booth stood and retrieved the pizza, his eyes never leaving woman in his apartment. Even after all these years she still could surprise him but this surprise, it was heartbreaking. She was dying of heartbreak and it was all his fault.
"This loneness… I know it will be the death of me." She meekly confessed as soon as the door was firmly shut, "I thought you held the answers but coming back here… maybe I was wrong all along."
"Bones, you don't have to be alone. Joy loves you. She has never stopped." He tried to soothe, trying to keep this tears at bay but it was a war he would never win.
"Yes," She whispered faintly, "but do you? Because Booth, you're the only thing worth it anymore. All my daughter is, is a constant reminder of you… of us… of this."
He stood silent, watching her slowly pace. Every so often her eyes would glance at him but soon fall. She exhaled twice then turned to the man who once held her future. Cupping his face, she lightly brushed her lips against his and smiled as life slowly began to pump through her veins.
"I can't live dying of heartbreak anymore."
After living eleven years with an almost daily struggle of loving too much, Temperance Brennan was at her breaking point.
He thought he had always known that he was the one. But deep down from the second her eyes locked on his, her whole life had shifted. Everything in her life had made sense from that moment, as long as he was in it. He was irrationally, earth shatteringly the only one that would ever make her heart flutter as it did when he was around.
She knew. She always had.
And it was killing her.