Disclaimer: Penguins of Madagascar and all related characters are the property of Nickelodeon, DreamWorks, and any or all related affiliates. This fiction was created for the purpose of having fun and being creative, no money is being made in any from it's creation and posting.
Paternity Pursuit
Chapter 8
By
Wildgoose
(The morning sun shines down through the entrance in the ceiling reflecting it's light off of the rungs of the ladder onto the wall opposite of them, it is clearly early as the penguins have all fallen asleep wherever they were sitting during the night while working out the details of the return trip to New York and remain there still. The only sound is the whistling of a tea kettle sitting on a hot plate in the middle of the penguins dinner table. A moment later Kitsune emerges from her quarters to tend the kettle by turning the hot plate off and then adding a type of herbal tea to the water a spoonful at a time and then replaces the lid to allow the still boiling water to blend it. As she moves about the others begin to wake up to the aroma of the tea.)
Kowalski: What is that odor? (sniffs the air) Is that….tea? (rubs his face with his flipper to further wake himself.) Good lord, the smell is everywhere.
Private: (stretches as he yawns and sniffs the air.) It rather pleasant actually, if it's not a bother Kitsune I'd like to try some.
Skipper: Private, tea is for girls. Men drink coffee and you know it.
Kowalski: Even though we've never actually HAD coffee.
Skipper: That's not the point, drinking coffee is a manly thing to do and therefore whenever somebody asks then that's what we drink. (Kitsune ignores Skipper's commentary and pours Private a wooden cup of tea.)
Private: (looks nervously at Skipper before accepting the cup.) Thank you. (Kitsune nods and moves back to the table and for a moment begins to whistle to herself.)
Erin: (picks her head up from her work station.) Is she whistling…?
Pepper: (who was sitting next to her is now stretching.) I, ….I think she is. Good god, she's making tea! (momentary pause before she jumps up happily) Is it Christmas already?
Private: I don't get it.
Erin: The only time Kitsune ever makes hot tea is Christmas. It's a traditional thing from back home, one of the few things that makes her happy.
Syron: (rubbing her face) It's not Christmas, people. That is unless you guys have slept straight through the last seven months.
Kowalski: (whips out his abacus and begins doing calculations based on the angle and intensity of the sunlight reflecting off the metal ladder.) Nope, we've only slept through the night.
Elisa: So wait, …Kitsune's actually in a good mood for a change? First thing in the morning?
Meg: In a good mood for the first time, period. (pause) Okay who are you and where's Kitsune?
Skipper: Don't worry ladies, …we'll make her talk. (Kitsune smirks and regurgitates five throwing stars and tosses them striking and imbedding in the floor in a line one after the other leading up to Skippers crotch.)
Syron: Have a seat, Skipper, there's no longer any doubt. (Turns to Kitsune) We're all happy to see you in a good mood this morning, you are in a good mood right? (Kitsune nods)
Syron: So what's changed? (Kitsune walks over to Kowalski and regurgitates her notepad and pencil then writes a note.)
Kitsune: (writes) Whatever you do, don't hug me. I owe you my thanks for a great deed.
Kowalski: Um, …okay. (Kitsune leans forward and gives him a kiss on the cheek. As she rights herself she looks back at her team who are standing there beside themselves with mouths open almost to the floor. After a long moment Meg regains the ability to move and snatches the note off of Kitsune's pad, reads it and then turns to Kowalski.)
Meg: What did you do to her…?
Kowalski: I've done nothing, why do you ask?
Syron: No, no, …there's no a chance in hell you're getting out of this story. Do you have any idea what kind of torment that girl's been living in because she's couldn't tolerate close contact? Do you have any idea what kind of torment we've been living in knowing we've had to cover up things that shall not be mentioned here? What did you do, where did you find the missing piece of the puzzle?
Kowalski: To be honest, after Marlene told me Kitsune's tale that she heard from Antonio and then Rico explained to me what happened after he showed his gratitude to her for showing him how to meditate I was able to deduce the trigger that sets her off during close contact. If you wish to be thankful to someone I imagine it should be Rico, he was the one who was brave enough to put the theory to the test.
Erin: Wait, by put to the test do you mean….? (Kitsune shakes hear head no and then scowls)
Kitsune: (gestures) I'm not as cheap a date as you guys are. We just had a candlelight dinner, very calm, very romantic, …and nobody died. (She smiles and places flower that Rico had given her back into the feathers on her head and walks away.)
Elisa: Whoa wait, you guys had dinner together? (Pause) Are there any leftovers? (Kitsune gestures to her quarters. A moment later Elisa comes out of Kitsune's room dragging the table with her.) There's a freggin banquet here people, oh and I found Rico. He's still sleeping.
Meg: Sleeping as in alive, right? Not sleeping with the fishes?
Kitsune: (Sighs deeply and then Gestures) Wake him up, I made the tea with him in mind. Eat the leftovers before they go bad, people. (She waddles to elsewhere in the cave.)
Skipper: (sighs) I should imagine that the money for this banquet came out of our reserves.
Private: You mean the money we stole from the zookeeper after we beat him up?
Erin: You mugged you're zookeeper before you left…? (begins laughing hysterically) I want to be YOU guys.
Skipper: (Scowls) Soldiers don't steal, Private. We Borrow, don't forget that.
Private: Understood Skipper, but since borrowing also involves returning. Shouldn't you then return that pearl necklace you borrowed from Alice.
Skipper: (clears his throat.) Um, of coarse Private. (begins to drift off.) Just not yet, ..they're so shiny and pretty…
Private: (looks awkward) Right then, …um I'll just leave you with that and be on my way.
Kowalski: Where are you going, Private? Don't leave me here with him when he's like this. (Walks quickly after Private.)
Syron: (turns to her crew and places her flippers on her hips) Hold your heads in shame, girls. The four of you have just been outsmarted by one guy. (shakes her head) What is this world coming to?
(The scene fades to late that evening as the guys are preparing to leave. Both groups are going over the plans that had been made the previous night. Marlene is listening from a nearby chair as her back had been giving her problems during the day.)
Skipper: Okay people, let's go over this drill one more time. Syron and her team will assist us with our egress out of this place. Once we're clear of the zoo walls we're on our own, just like New York it'll take all of use to pull off our disguise and hail a cab. Rico, …I hope you didn't short us with your romantic escapade the other night. (Rico shakes his head no.) Once we're at the Philadelphia airport we catch a chopper back to New York the same as the way we got down here. Marlene, ..make sure you eat plenty before we go. There won't be any pit stops for food this time around. (Marlene nods.)
Private: How are we going to get back into the zoo, Skipper? Alice thinks we were abducted.
Skipper: We'll have to make sure we cross paths with officer X when we get into town, once he's recovered us it won't take him long to figure out that we're the missing animals from the zoo. The parks commissioner will likely commendate him for a job well done, no doubt. Once we've done that then it shouldn't be long at all before we're home sweet home. Who knows, maybe there will be some media coverage regarding our recovery.
Syron: You're starting to get a bit delusional there, Skipper
Skipper: We've all got our moments, Syron. I'm sure you don't want your people knowing what your's was. (Syron holds up a flipper in apology.) Alight people, let's make sure our gear is wired. Final checks, …Private?
Private: Provisions should be adequate, Skipper. Eight cans of herring, four bottles of water.
Skipper: Kowalski…?
Kowalski: Intel is up to date and the best available with our resources.
Skipper: Excellent, Rico weapons check! (Rico does a few jiggles with his belly and gives an so so gesture.) I need more info than that, man. What do you mean by so so? (Rico regurgitates everything in his stomach to show Skipper first hand. The contents are a flame thrower, brass knuckles, a brick of c-4, a blowtorch, and a thirty caliber machine gun.)
Kitsune: (writes on her pad) What do you mean by so so? That's a pretty heavy ordinance load. (she regurgitates an additional five throwing stars, her katana blade, a handful of smoke pellets and a grapple gun.) I like to carry relatively light, it's good for mobility.
Marlene: Eww that's disgusting, where do you people get this crap? That aside, how can you people possibly fit that stuff into your bellies without killing yourselves? (Rico and Kitsune exchange glances before responding.)
Kitsune: (writes) Cast iron stomach. (pats her belly just before the two of them re ingest their weapons.)
Skipper: All right then, now that the checklist is out of the way, let's move out. ( as everybody begins to head out in the direction of the storm drains Kitsune takes Rico's flipper to hold him back for a moment.)
Kitsune: (writes on her pad and then places her flipper on Rico's heart.) Please think of me often, hopefully a long distance relationship will work for us.
Rico: (places his flipper on her heart and grunts his words.) I was going to anyway, but how will we get together once in a while?
Kitsune: (writes) Meditate when you can in the evenings, …I promise I'll find you. (Rico looks confused) Trust me. (She smiles and gestures that they should catch up with the others.)
(The scene cuts to the curb out on the street in front of the zoo. An awkward figure wearing a long overcoat and a hat enters a waiting taxi cab and shuts the door.)
Driver: So where to buddy..? (The voice of a speak and spell comes from the back seat.)
Speak and spell: Philadelphia airport.
Driver: (looks in his mirror) You ok buddy, you sound pretty weird.
Speak and spell: No voice box, too much smoking.
Driver: Tell me about it, ..my old lady…
Speak and spell: Meter running, shut up and drive.
Driver: (sighs) Whatever you say buddy, …I'm just trying to make a living. (Pulls away from the curb and gets into traffic. Inside the coat the penguins are stacked single file on top of each other with Skipper at the head. At the very bottom is Marlene is panting since after sitting she no longer has to support their weight.)
Marlene: I can't believe you guys put me at the bottom of the totem pole, can't you see I'm pregnant?
Skipper: It couldn't be helped, Marlene. You're the only one of us who has knees, we needed you to get us into the cab without tipping us all over.
Marlene: Yea great, my kids will probably come out flat as pancakes now. ( A long moment of silence ensues during which the group tries to maintain balance around a sharp turn.)
Private: Marlene, have you given any thought to what you might name your pups?
Marlene: Well, I have no idea if I'm having boys or girls so no. I haven't given it much thought.
Private: Do you think you might consider my name if one of them turns out to be a boy? Private's a good name, right?
Skipper: Any of our names are equally as good, soldier so get in line.
Marlene: Um yea, …I think what Skipper's trying to get at is that I've been approached by everybody on that very subject. Except Kitsune, but either way I'll take everything into consideration ok?
Private: Oh um, ..alright then. I didn't mean to press the issue. (Somewhere in the coat Rico let's one loose with a loud report. Loud enough that even the cab driver heard it and rolled down his window while muttering a few swears to himself.)
Marlene: Oh god, …Rico! (fearing that it would all come her way she lifts the bottom of the coat off the floor to allow in inflow of air that drives the noxious fumes straight up to the top and out of the neck where Skipper is.)
Skipper: (eyes begin to water and nostrils sting from the stench) Sweet mother MacArthur, …the horror! (Marlene's victory chuckle can be heard all the way from the bottom.)
(Eventually the cab arrives at the airport and the group pays the driver, then gets out as awkwardly as they got in. Once they've walked far enough to be out of view the coat can be seen collapsing to the floor as if the occupant had simply melted away. The coat is then pulled into a corner where the group sought cover and tucked away.)
Skipper: We need to get out to the tarmac pronto, which way Kowalski?
Kowalski: I suggest we hide in somebody's baggage until we can get past the check in counter…
Private: Couldn't we just use the ventilation shafts like we did the last time?
Kowalski: What?
Private: (moves out of the way and points to a vent I the wall behind where he was standing.) Look, see a vent right there.
Kowalski: I suppose, if you wanted to deviate from my hours of planning we could do that.
Rico: (Regurgitates a brick of C-4) Kaboom..?
Skipper: Negative, ….there are to many humans around. After an explosion of any kind they'd shut this whole place down and we'd never get out.
Rico: Aww… (he re-ingests the explosive and then regurgitates a blowtorch and begins to melt the screws on the vent.)
(The scene snaps to the tarmac as the groups discretely climbs into the wheel well of a helicopter shortly before it powers up it's engine and takes off.)
Marlene: Um, listen guys the first time around was just so much fun and all, especially getting shot in the butt by a rocket, but we're not going to be jumping out of the aircraft again are we?
Kowalski: Negative, this aircraft is scheduled to land at JFK airport in New York. So not to worry, Marlene.
Marlene: Oh good, ..I was just thinking I couldn't handle much more excitement. The pups are getting restless if you catch my drift.
Kowalski: Um, …no sorry. What exactly are you getting at?
Marlene: They're bumping about a lot in there.
Kowalski: I'm still not sure if I understand, perhaps if you could explain it from a standpoint of quantum physics.
Marlene: Kowalski, …do the words dork, dweeb, or nerd mean anything to you?
Kowalski: No, should they?
Marlene: I think if you looked those words up in the dictionary, each on of them would have a picture of you next to the definition.
Kowalski: (looks excited.) Good lord, you mean I'm famous?
Marlene: (rolls her eyes.) Yea, …not quite.
Private: (changes the subject.) Marlene, do you think the humans will try to use Antonio for breeding again?
Skipper: What brought that up?
Private: I was just thinking of the way he acted when Marlene tried to tell him about her pups. It's so sad to think that there could be lots more babies out there who won't know their dad.
Marlene: Not to worry, Private. I worked something out with Kitsune and she said she'd make sure Antonio was taken out of the breeding program. He won't have to own up to any more responsibilities like this one.
Rico: (grunts) You mean….(drags his flipper across his neck.)
Marlene: No Rico, I don't mean that. There will be no killing or maiming involved. Although she did offer, ..but I don't want to be like that. I'd like to think that I'm better than that, …Kitsune said it would only be a matter of a few keystrokes on the computer.
Private: Oh, …I guess that's okay. I was worried for a moment there that something bad was going to happen to him.
Skipper: The guy was a total jerk, Private. He even charmed Marlene into a one night stand.
Marlene: Hey, …I'm right here you know. And he didn't charm me, …even I have needs. I haven't seen a male otter in two years for the record. (points) You all had your fun too, so I don't even want to hear about it.
Rico: (grunts) Hey!
Marlene: Fine, except for Rico. HE just had dinner and a butt kicking.
Rico: (Makes a fist and thrusts it into the air.) Whoo hoo!
Kowalski: There's no doubt about it, Skipper. There's not a male alive who would be happy about being beaten up by a girl unless there was love involved. (The penguins all shake their heads pity. A moment later the helicopter encounters what feels like heavy turbulence followed by the sound of a failing turbine.)
Marlene: Oh boy, that wasn't good was it.
Skipper: Kowalski, report!
Kowalski: I believe the sound we just heard is referred to as a flameout. The helicopter may have lost an engine.
Skipper: Only one?
Kowalski: Well this particular helicopter model has twin turbines and since it doesn't feel like we're plummeting to our deaths I can only deduce that the helicopter has only lost one.
Private: But it does feel like we're falling, It feels like I've lost half my weight. It kind of tickles.
Kowalski: Not to worry, while it does feel as though we're descending rapidly the helicopter is probably attempting an emergency landing before something else goes wrong. Although it would probably be wise for everybody to clear the doors, no doubt the leading gear will be lowered any time now. (No sooner had Kowalski spoken the doors began to open. Everybody somersaulted their way out of danger except Marlene who wasn't quite quick enough to make it. The doors drop out from under her and she screams as she begins to fall. Fortunately the fall is cut short by Private who leaps over the edge catching her paws while The others secure Private's feet.)
Private: Hold tight Marlene, I've got you.
Marlene: I can see that, but who's got you? (The voice of Skipper emerges from inside the aircraft even though he cannot be seen from Marlene's position.)
Skipper: It's the goof troop, who do you think it is. (There is no need to pull the both of them back in as the helicopter touches down leaving Marlene with her feet on the ground.)
Marlene: (panting) Ok, that was fun. Let's not do that again, what do you say guys. (The penguins jump down from the aircraft and assist Marlene in getting clear of the area.)
Skipper: You'll get no argument from us. (Turns to his men) Kowalski, report! Where are we?
Kowalski: By the looks of it, …an old parking lot overgrown by weeds. (looks about at some of the buildings a few of which are boarded up.) In a run down part of town. If I take into account our brief time in the air, direction of travel for that time and rate of descent, …(Kowalski jumps up onto Rico's shoulders to get a better look around.) We're in Camden.
Marlene: If I recall, that was the one place we didn't want end up right?
Kowalski: Ideally, no. But if we're near the water front then we're not that deep into the hole. If we keep as low a profile as possible then we should be ok. (looks back at the helicopter as the humans are investigating a light amount of smoke coming from one of the engines.) I doubt they'll be lifting off any time soon.
Skipper: So much for our ride home, what do we have for a backup plan?
Kowalski: Sorry Skipper, the only backup plan we designed was if we'd actually missed our flight while still in Philadelphia. Catching another chopper would have only meant waiting an hour or so. But this, ….this will take some time to re plan.
Skipper: Understood. (looks up at the cloudy sky as the distant rumble of thunder can be heard.) We're going to need some shelter pretty soon, people. At this point I'll take options from anybody.
Kowalski: I'd suggest grabbing a cab back to Philly but I don't see any. (another rumble of thunder is heard.)
Skipper: Well, we can't stay here. We'll head east toward the water front until we find a place to hold up for a while. The group begins to head out of the overgrown parking lot and then begins to duck in and out of alleyways as they proceed down the street to avoid being seen. Sometime later it begins to pour and with a lack of a better option the group takes shelter in a large cardboard box that was lying on it's side located in one of the alleyways they ducked into.)
Private: What a mess this turned out to be. Maybe we should have stayed in the helicopter, at least we'd be much dryer and who knows maybe they'd fix it without to much trouble and be on their way.
Kowalski: With smoke coming out of one of the engines, that seems highly unlikely. No doubt a special truck would have to come get it and take it to a repair facility. We'd have been spotted for sure.
Private: But aren't we supposed to be recovered by the humans?
Skipper: Not in Camden, we might end up being recovered by the wrong sort and end up on the dinner menu somewhere or as part of some exotic garment.
Kowalski: In this place, it would probably be the former rather than the latter.
Skipper: And it's not something we're willing to chance. We hold up here until the rain stops and then we move out.
(The scene fades to late that night, the rain is steadily falling and the group is still holding up inside the cardboard box which was placed on top of a wooden skid that was found in the alley way to keep them from being flooded out. Rico, Private, and Kowalski have managed to fall asleep despite the circumstances leaving Skipper awake because Marlene is afraid of her surroundings.)
Skipper: (closes the last of the cardboard flaps on the box to make sure they stay as dry as possible.) They're just shadows caused by the street lights, Marlene. There's nothing to be afraid of out there.
Marlene: Easy for you to say, you guys venture outside the zoo constantly. Look at me, …do I look like I could survive out there.
Skipper: This is nonsense, Marlene. What could you possible be afraid of?
Marlene: Being eaten, …there's wild dogs in places like this aren't there?
Skipper: I doubt it, …Kowalski made this out to be a bad place to be but I doubt it's THAT bad. (Gives the cardboard box flaps a tug to make sure they stay shut.) Try to get some sleep, we'll move out for the water front in the morning. (Marlene reluctantly lies down on the cardboard floor. A moment later Skipper flies down next to her and rolls to face away as he tries to get some sleep. Marlene tosses and turns a bit trying to get comfortable and after a moment she begins to shiver. Several minutes later Skipper opens his eyes in the dark.) I thought otters we're designed by nature to stay warm even when wet.
Marlene: We are but this is different, it's a raw freezing paws kind of chill. I can't shake it,… literally. (pause) Is there anything that can be used as a blanket?
Skipper: (After a long minute of silence Skipper picks his head up and looks about to see if anybody else is awake.) Permission to cuddle granted. But it's just to keep warm, …don't get any ideas.
Marlene: What…? Um, ….seriously.
Skipper: The offer only goes out once, Marlene. (Marlene moves herself closer as Skipper remains turned away from her and lies down right up against Skipper's body. At first his feathers feel as cold as her paws but moments after she wraps her paws about his chest and pulls him close she begins to warm right up.)
Marlene: (sighs as she begins to drift off to sleep.) Mmm, you're cozy.
Skipper: (puts his head down and sighs. A moment later he cracks a weak smile and drifts off to sleep.) Sleep tight little lady.
Chapter 9 coming soon.
Comments and suggestions are always welcome.