A/N: I know I said the tag would only be two chapters but, well, here's another and at least one more to follow. Oh, BTW, at least one character is acting OOC but that's SOP for this story so don't give me too much grief over it. (Yes, I'm talking to you, LoneRanger1.)

Many thanks for the input of Shadows-of-Realm and Princess DoGooder.

Sandy

Making Amends

The Tag - Part 3

Memento Mori

John came to a stop at the end of the catwalk two steps behind Ronon. He took a long drink of water then dumped some of it over his head. Ronon laughed and leaned his hips against the railing looking as if he'd just been out for a casual stroll.

The military man tried not to stare at his friend but couldn't help it. The Satedan had worn the dreadlocks from the first day they'd known each other then, for some reason he'd shown up at yesterday's usual pre-mission breakfast briefing without them. The hair that had been well below his shoulders was now no more than two inches long all over his head.

"Uh, Chewy, now that it's just you and me, why'd you cut your hair?"

Ronon shrugged his massive shoulders and took a drink. "It was time."

"Time?"

He shrugged again. "To let the past rest."

That was something John fully understood. The trouble was, ever since the trip to Hawaii, the past was all he could think about. And the future. He shook himself out of a light daydream. "Come on. Race ya to the other end."

Ronon grunted in agreement and the two men took off. Half way to their destination, John got a call. "Sheppard."

"Colonel, you have several high priority messages in today's data transmission from the SGC."

"Send 'em to my personal workstation, Chuck."

"Yes, sir." The radio clicked off.

The men resumed running, Ronon watching him from the corner of his eye. "You need to get that?"

John shook his head. "They can wait till I finally kick your ass at something."

His friend laughed. "Not happening."

John took him up on his implied challenge and increased his speed. His muscles burned from the exertion but still he ran, determined to win for once and without the aid of the retrovirus.

Teyla stood outside John's quarters and activated the chime. The door slid open to show her friend standing there wearing nothing but a pair of pants and his dog tags. His skin had a sheen of sweat on it and was obviously about to get in the shower.

"Hey. What's this?" John nodded at the tray in her hands. There was a teapot and two cups but no cookies. He liked cookies with his tea. Preferably chocolate chip.

"Today is the anniversary of the death of your father. I've come to share the Athosian memorial tea ceremony with you." She smiled that kind and gentle smile he'd always found incredibly attractive then set the tray on his desk.

"Thanks, but that's not…"

"John, we have not had a chance to do this before because there were always other issues that took precedence. Now that there is nothing more urgent to interfere, it is time it was done."

"Um…" he didn't know what to say except, "…okay. So, what do we do? I don't have a speech prepared."

Again that smile. "Speaking is not necessary unless you wish to. All that is required is the remembrance. For some moments in our lives, there are no words that will suffice because death leaves a heartache no one can heal yet love leaves a memory no one can steal."

John didn't know how to respond to that. His memories of his father were few and far between. Most of them were not happy ones but they were his only remembrances of the man who'd given him life and so were kept close to his heart. "There's a poem I read in high school that might be appropriate, High Flight by John Gillespie Magee, Jr." He lifted one of the cups as Teyla did the same.

"Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth

And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;

Sunward I've climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth

Of sun-split clouds, - and done a hundred things

You have not dreamed of - wheeled and soared and swung

High in the sunlit silence. Hov'ring there,

I've chased the shouting wind along, and flung

My eager craft through footless halls of air…

Up, up the long, delirious, burning blue

I've topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace

Where never lark nor even eagle flew -

And, while with silent lifting mind I've trod

The high untrespassed sanctity of space,

Put out my hand, and touched the face of God."

They both drank and John silently thanked her. He'd never told her how much her friendship and the bits and pieces of wisdom she'd shared over the last few years meant to him, yet he was certain she knew, and that made him feel just a little better.

Slumped in his desk chair and staring sightlessly at the monitor in front of him, John leaned his head on his hand. Water dripped from his recently washed hair onto his bare shoulders and chest but he ignored it. He'd read and reread the email from his brother thinking he must be misinterpreting the meaning of his words but each time it was the same. He thought about having Rodney run it through one of his fancy translation programs but didn't.

His first thought was to deny David's request out of hand. That is until he opened the email from his niece. Melissa made her own plea but in her case, all he could see when he read her words was her face downcast in rejection, maybe even a tear or two if he said no. He didn't want to see that look on her face ever again for any reason, especially if he was the cause. It had been bad enough before he'd gotten to know her. Now it was damn near impossible. I wonder if this is what it's like to have kids.

With a sigh of resignation he changed into his civvies, pulled his duffle and garment bags from the closet and began packing. He didn't need much as he was only staying the one night. That done, he touched his headset. "Sheppard to Woolsey."

"Woolsey."

"I need a quick meet."

"As a matter of fact, I happen to have an entire hour before my next, uh, meet with the IOA. Come to my office now if you like."

"Thanks. Be there in less than two."

Twenty minutes later, John was back in the Gate Room. Usually Chuck was on duty but this time Amelia was there.

"Sergeant." He greeted her. "I'm ready."

"The usual coordinates in Vancouver, Colonel?"

He almost said no but wanted, needed to see Jeannie before he went to join his family. "Yes. Then I'll need a lift to California."

"Yes, sir."

Like the eye of a hurricane, Jeannie, and her daughter, had become a calm warmth amidst all the chilling chaos in his life. In their presence, he felt like he could just be John, a man who liked riding Ferris wheels, watching college football, playing video games, spending time with his friends and making love with his girlfriend. It made a wonderful change from Colonel Sheppard, the cold, hard career soldier who could kill without a second thought.

In just a few short months the Miller women had made him yearn for things he hadn't wanted or felt he deserved in a really long time, like happiness…and someone to love who loved him back unconditionally. The last time he'd had anything even close to it was just after his mother had passed away. Inez had treated him like he was the most precious thing in the world even after he went off to boarding school. When he'd come home for holidays, she always acted like he was the prodigal son returning to the fold. And that's how he felt, at least for a while, but it all ended when he'd gone off to college.

No, that's not true, John berated himself as he watched the people, civilian and military, moving around him, some waving a greeting, others nodding and smiling as they passed and still others who ignored him. The citizens of Atlantis laughed, cried, played, fought and loved together. And yes, they even argued amongst themselves but, in the end, they were always there for each other…just like family. It's here, too.

He snapped out of his reverie when he felt the tingle of the transport and a moment later was on the front step of Jeannie's house. The echo of his knock had barely faded when the door was jerked open. His bags hit the ground as he was enveloped in a tight hug. For the first time in longer than he could remember, he didn't hesitate, just wrapped his arms around her. He lifted her off her feet and pulled her tight against his chest, her blonde hair tickling his nose and smelling of strawberries. It was something he'd seldom done before today and never in front of the entire neighborhood or anyone for that matter.

She pushed out of his arms, took him by the hand and led him inside. "Mom! Colonel Sheppard's here!" Madison shouted up the stairs as she dragged him into the living room. "My dad got me a new game. It's really cool. Wanna play?"

John dropped his bags next to the chair letting her keep hold of his hand. "Sorry, kiddo. Just stopped in to say hi to you and your mom." Bright blue eyes looked up at him in disappointment. "We'll spend some time together in a couple days."

"Promise?"

"Have I ever lied to you?" He grinned when she shook her head unreservedly. "You know, Maddie, I've, uh, been thinking."

"What about?"

He sat down and pulled her onto his lap. Something else he'd never done. "I think it's about time you stopped calling me Colonel Sheppard."

Her forehead crinkled in confusion as she looped an arm loosely around his neck. She was very demonstrative with her affection, just like her mother. "What do you want me to call you?"

"How about…John?"

"Mmm…okay." The girl grinned up at him and they both stood when Jeannie came into the room. He couldn't help a sharp intake of breath when he saw her. They walked toward each other and, mindful of the presence of her daughter, gave each other a quick kiss.

"Okay, break it up!"

John had started to cup one hand on the side of Jeannie's cheek, his fingers just touching her hair when Rodney and Jennifer came in from the kitchen. His arm dropped to his side then both hands were clasped behind him as he turned to face Jeannie's brother and his wife.

"What are you doing here?" The physicist asked.

"Just stopped by on the way to…" His voice trailed off until he was mumbling.

"What?" Rodney, Jennifer and Jeannie said at the same time.

He rubbed a hand through his hair and looked uneasy. "I, uh, I'm going to…visit my father's grave."

"Really?" Again they said it together.

"Yeah." His feet shifted as Jeannie came to stand next to him. "Why is that so hard to believe?"

Rodney replied defensively. "It's just that you haven't talked about him since he passed away." The physicist's forehead creased in thought. "Come to think of it, you've never mentioned him or the rest of your family as long as I've known you. I only knew you had family because I hacked into the personnel records."

"Meredith!" Jeannie admonished her brother.

"What? He was the military head of our base and I wanted to know something about him, just in case."

Jeannie wrapped her slender fingers around John's bicep. "Want us to go with you?"

John opened his mouth to say yes but no sound came out. Instead, he snapped it shut and cleared his throat. "No. I, uh, no. I'll be fine." His back straightened, certainty overtaking the doubt. "It's just a quick family thing. We'll put flowers or something down, say a few words then go have dinner afterwards. I'll stay the night and be home by 1200 tomorrow at the latest."

"If you're sure." Jeannie asked again.

One side of his mouth lifted. "Yes, absolutely."

"Okay." Jeannie walked him to the other room and waited while he called the Odyssey. Her hand lifted in a wave as he disappeared in a flash.

TBC