I... have nothing to say about this one. Except that I had a math test today, and that might just explain some of the insanity. Haha.

Warnings: Hints of something mind blowing, just to keep it PG :) and slash. Yup.

Word Count: 520

008. Innocence

When Neal gives Peter that oh-so-innocent smile, the latter always knows that he's up to something. Especially when there's expensive wine involved, because Neal knows that trying to adjust the agent's pallet is, in fact, a pointless endeavor, but he just doesn't care. It's even more suspicious when Neal gets cuddly, because Cuddly-Neal plus Innocent-Neal is never a logical equation—even when it equals something mind blowing, because Neal is definitely capable of that and he just loves to flaunt it. Even that, however, is not quite innocent in terms of the dictionary.

This time is quite different, against Peter's common sense, because Innocent-Neal plus Present-Giving-Neal minus Suspicious-Neal times the difference of Trustworthy-Neal minus Sarcastic-Neal really doesn't make any sense to Peter either. Especially when said Neal is holding out a perfectly wrapped present with a perfectly tied golden bow on the top, because honestly, could there be anything more innocent than that? As Peter opened the box, he soon discovered that there could, in fact, be something much more innocent than that. Like murderers, those were definitely more innocent. Inside of the box was a card, and on that card was absolutely nothing. Like, blank nothing. Like, Innocent-Neal plus Box plus Peter's-Birthday plus WAY-Too-Innocent-Neal equals Empty-Box and Smug-Neal. But Peter was never very good at math.

Peter stared at Neal, trying to find anything that would give away the clue to the something fantastic and possibly, possibly something mind blowing, if Peter would give him the satisfaction that was surely hidden between the lines. But all that Neal would give away was a simple, "lemon juice". No "happy birthday", no "I love you", no "just come over here and kiss me and I might give you your birthday present", no, no, no because that would be much too much to ask, now wouldn't it? Definitely.

It didn't take too long, after Neal had retreated to the bedroom, for Peter to find the hidden message between the cardboard slats of the box that read, "Google it", which is exactly what he did. After that, it didn't take too long for Peter to find the hidden message on the "allegedly" empty paper that read, "Google just saved your ass."

That's it? Peter thought. That's IT?

Pissed-Peter plus Innocent-Neal equals In-Trouble-Neal plus Still-Pissed-Peter. That is a very logical equation.

So the agent stormed up to the bedroom where he did not, in fact, find Neal. That made Peter even more pissed, which completely threw off his equation, which made it so that he had to add an X just to make it logical, and Peter was even worse at math when they threw the alphabet into it, especially when the only thing that X could possibly represent is where the heck is Neal?

And of course as soon as Neal pops out of nowhere and just happens to greet Peter with something completely unexpected and positively mind blowing, Pissed-Peter wasn't so pissed anymore.

Because Pissed-Peter plus Innocent-Neal maybe isn't really all that bad, as long as it equals that certain something mind blowing. But, that would be asking too much.

Please review! It would make me so happy, and I know that a lot of people like these because they have it on alert. I'm doing these to make me a better writer, and I would love it if you could tell me what you liked about it, or how I can improve!

Thanks for reading :)