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Chapter 4- Happiness or not?
RPOV
I got out of bed on the 3rd day of Junior high. Depressed, like yesterday. You know what Rachel, you don't need him. I tried to convince myself, but I knew it wasn't true. I did need him, so much and I would find a way to have him.
When I went to school, I had Family and Consumer Science 8th period, with Finn. The teacher told us our assignment for the week. "You will each be paired up with a partner that I will chose for you. You will than raise a child, well a baby doll. But it had artificial intelligence so it will cry when hungry, sad, or when it needs its diaper changed." Hopefully I didn't get paired up with Finn, I mean what are the odds? "I will now tell you your partners." she announced "Santana and Matt, Britney and Jake, Quinn and Artie, Puck and Tina-" At this point I knew I was going to get paired up with Finn. Yay I get to raise a baby with the boy that hates me who I used to be best friends with! I just can't wait to see how this turns out. "and Finn and Rachel." She handed us our babies and class was dismissed. I walked out into the hallway with the baby in my arms. Finn right beside me. We walked into glee club together. The rest of the day we just sat in glee club and worked on our singing like every other day.(A/N Finn joined glee club already.)
I got on the bus the baby still in my arms. I looked out the window staring at the cheerios, the most popular girls in school. How I wished I could just fit in. What I said to Finn yesterday was a lie, I did want to be popular. They had it all, the looks, the reputation, the guys. EVERYTHING. And I wanted it too. "Hey." Finn said as he slid into my seat. "Umm hi." I said confused. Why was he here and what did he want? "Listen Rachel, I am so sorry. I know I didn't seem like I cared about you enough but, I really do Rach. I love you!" he told me. I didn't know what to say, Finn Hudson, my ex-best friend just told me he loved me. I didn't know why but all I did was hug him. He hugged me back and now I didn't feel any need to be popular because I had something all of them wished they had but didn't, Finn. I was about to say I love you back but it was out stop.
When we got off the bus I was so happy. "Rach, I'll come over at about 6 ok?" Finn asked. "K."" I said twirling a strand of my hair. I walked to my house. Finn had the baby and he was gonna come over later to work on our project. I walked in the house. "Hey dads!" I said happily "Hi sweetie, you seem happy! What happened today at school?" My dad asked me. "Oh nothing special, Finn's coming over later at like 6 to work on a project." I told my dad as I ran upstairs. I looked at my clock 3:01. I dialed Mercedes number. "Hey Rachel what's up? She asked when she picked up the phone. "I need to go to the mall now and wanted to know if you could come." I asked slipping on my shoes.
"Yeah I'll be over in a minute my mom can drive us." she answered. "Ok thanks Mercedes!" I said and I hung up the phone.
"I'll pick you guys up at 5. Ok?" Mercedes' mom told us. "Ok" we both answered in harmony. "So why did you need to go to the mall anyway?" Mercedes asked me as we walked down the mall. "Well Finn is coming over la-" She interrupted me "No need to go on, girl I know exactly what you need!" She said grabbing my hand and pulling me into a store. I looked around a little and then I saw them and so did Mercedes. We stopped dead in our tracks. Quinn Fabray, Santana and Brittney were all shopping here. "Oh look who's here guys!" Quinn shouted to Santana and Brittney. They walked up to us."Umm guys what are you doing here?" she looked around the store. "I don't see any Animal sweaters around here, or Plus sizes." she said all of them laughing. Mercedes looked down at herself and she looked insecure. "You know what Quinn? Why don't you shut up and leave us all alone because the truth is yeah some people adore you, but most people hate you. They think you're a stuck up fake girl, which you are. You try way to hard to be like the girls in the magazine and you still can't pull it off." I said with attitude in my words. "You don't know who you're talking to, do you?" she asked as Santana and Brittney scurried away. "Yea I think I do." I said Mercedes talking to Santana obviously telling her off. "Rachel Berry, you better watch out!" she said walking out of the store, then she backed up. "Oh and Finns mine." She spat out at me. I rolled my eyes. Mercedes gave me an outfit and told me to try it on. I went into the dressing room and put on the outfit. It was dark studded skinny jeans, a black shirt with neon green, pink and orange microphones on it with black converse that had neon green laces. I loved the outfit so I bought it. Then we went to the salon I got my nails painted neon orange. Then they did my hair, they really just washed it but they also but blond highlights that would stay in for about 3 months. Then as Mercedes put it "it was makeup time!" I had mascara, eyeliner, light green eye shadow and pink lipstick. We bought extras of all the makeup just in case.
When I got home it was already 5:58. I retouched the lipstick and scurried to the door just as the doorbell rang. I opened the door.
FPOV
Oh. My. Gosh. Rachel looked so amazing, not like herself but still amazing. "You look great!" I said smiling giving her the baby. "Thanks." she replied blushing. "Umm we can go up to my room if you want." Rachel said as she walked up the stairs. I followed her up to her room, The walls were pink at the top of her room was in Gold Letters the word Broadway. They were playbills hanging up all over the walls. I had seen her room multiple times before but obviously she had redone it.
"Ok so first we have to fill out the baby's "birth certificate" so, what are we naming this baby?" she asked. "How about Drizzle?" I suggested. "Umm…sure I guess. I like it." she smiled. We finished up the rest of the "birth certificate" and Rachel was downstairs getting some snacks. I looked around her room, then I spotted a notebook. I walked over to her dresser where it was laying and opened it to the first page it read:
Rachel's Diary Do not read!
So of course being the jerk I am, I read it. I flipped to the last most recent entry. I read it quickly.
Dear Diary,
I just got home from school. Finn's my partner in Family and consumer Science. We have to work on a project where we have to raise a fake baby. At first I didn't want to be his partner because he hated me. But when I got on the bus he was really nice to me and you know what the best part was? He told me he loved me! I almost died! I am the happiest girl right now. I was gonna say I love you too but it was our bus stop…and I was way too nervous. But if me and Finn became a couple, I wouldn't need to fit in and plus Quinn Fabray would be SO jealous…of me, well me with Finn but still. Quinn Fabray would be jealous of me! Well I got to go, I'm going shopping with Mercedes to find a cute outfit for tonight when Finn comes over to work on our project.
Wow, she loved me too. Should I ask her out? Yeah, I should! But then I thought about it for a moment, was it really worth risking our friendship? I couldn't do that, not again even if it was only 2 days without her, it hurt me so bad. If we were to go out and break up what if we couldn't go back to being friends? It really wasn't worth it. I sighed. I heard Rachel coming up the stairs so I quickly put the diary back and took my place back on her bed. "Here you go." Rachel said as she placed the snacks down on the bed. "Thanks." I said. I was thinking about the consequences of dating Rachel. "Finn, what are you thinking about." she asked me. Obviously it was clear on my face I had something on my mind. "Nothing, its…nothing." I told her. "Finn, we're best friends, you can tell me anything." she assured me. "ok." I told her. She looked confused. "So, what is it?" she asked confused. "Do you like me?" I asked her and she nodded biting her lip nervously. "Rachel we can't be together." I told her. "Why not?" she asked. "It's not worth it-risking our friendship." I told her. "Yes it is!" she insisted. "No its not Rachel. What if we broke up and we couldn't fix our friendship, then what?"
"Atleast we would've had something for a while." she answerd "It's just not worth it Rach I'm sorry for what I said earlier on the bus, I didn't mean it. I have to go."
RPOV
Then he left. He just walked right out without another word. He said he loved me! Then he took it back! What kind of idiot jerk does that? Quinn can have him, I didn't even care anymore. But, I knew that was a lie. Today was the day I promised myself I would do anything to have Finn.
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