Painful Memories

So, I haven't updated in...forever. Yeah. I know. Unfortunately, you are not going to be able to kill me just yet, because it is WINTER VACATION and I refuse to let your anger destroy my happiness in finally having freedom. Let me repeat that in song-

"I'm gonna soak up the sun

Before it goes out on me
Don't have no master suite
I'm still the king of me
You have a fancy ride, but baby
I'm the one who has the key
Every time I turn around
I'm looking up, you're looking down
Maybe something's wrong with you
That makes you act the way you do
Maybe I am crazy too"

That's "Soak Up The Sun" by Sheryl Crow, in case you didn't recognize. Awesome song, you should listen to it.

Yeah, so anyways...

Wait! Why are you even reading this? Stop reading this! Read this chapter, it's infinitely more interesting than me and my ramblings!

Kelly jumped in, pointing her gun at the two silent figures on the bed.

"Whoa, whoa, cool it! It's just us! Jill and Kris, remember? Your friends?" Jill exclaimed, putting her hands up in the air and instinctively moving so that she was in front of Kris.

Kelly did not relax. She did, however, lower her gun and swiveled her eyes around the room, searching for any signs of danger. "What did you say you heard, Sabrina?"

Bri, still not looking at Kelly, sighed. "A crash. But I found the source."

Kelly turned to find Sabrina staring at the ground. She followed her glance and saw the shattered remains of what was once a beautiful glass lamp. Kelly then turned back to Sabrina, who simply stood there, not moving. Kelly got worried.

"It was like that before we came in," Kris said. "We were about to tell you. But then you came up, so…" Her voice trailed off, not because of the sudden realization that no further explanation was needed, but because of the strange noise coming out of Sabrina's throat. It sounded like a cross between a sob, a growl, and a person being strangled. Like choking on words.

Kris glanced to Kelly, expecting her to comfort Sabrina, but Kelly continued to stare at her friend. She made no attempt to come near her, instead, it seemed as if she was shrinking away. As if she was afraid of Bri's reaction.

Jill, too, saw this encounter and piped up. "Sabrina. Is everything alright? Was that lamp, uh, expensive? Because we can pay for it."

"It was like this before you got here?" Sabrina said quietly. The way she spoke was dead, a monotone.

"Yeah, it was just there." Kris said, worried now.

"It's not your fault, then. You don't need to do anything."

"Are you sure? We could split, I mean it's no trouble at all, really." Jill was worried as well, but, unlike Kris, she could not remain silent. She had to say something to make the tension seem like a pretense, like it was all good fun. Although this naivety was sometimes cute and relieving, in situations such as the one she was in now it seemed bothersome and would most likely have the opposite effect on the tension around her. Kris knew this, and sighed. Oh, Jill. Just keep your mouth shut sometimes.

Luckily for Jill, Sabrina did not lash out-not at her, at least.

"It was like this before you got here." Sabrina repeated, this time as a statement. She snapped her head up and her eyes turned completely black, dangerous and glinting. "It was like this before you got here."

Now Kris was frightened. The way Sabrina had said it… Someone was bound to get hurt. She had to act fast, before Sabrina did something she would probably regret.

Unfortunately, Jill beat her to it.

"Bri, what on earth are you saying? Why are you so angry?"

Sabrina turned on Jill, finally snapping. She was not really angry at her friend, just slightly annoyed. But it was all she needed. A target. And, like every other target in her life, she had a clear shot.

"Jill. You could afford to be a little less nosy in the future. But, since you won't stop bugging me, I'll tell you. My mother is dead. My father was rarely home. I got into fights when I was in grade school. The only thing that kept me there with high grades was my academic intelligence." She said the words with a sneer, her lips curled over her teeth in disgust. "I was just so smart that they couldn't possibly kick me out. Not to mention my father. The military hero who finally swooped down to save my life. He got into a huge argument with the head of the school." Sabrina spat out the words like venom. A very small part of her told her to stop, to think about where she was going. Tread lightly, you have to tread lightly, it pleaded.

No. I've had it with the secrets and the evasiveness. Jill wants to know, and after all this time, she deserves to know. It's our own fault she's asking. We've put this off for too long, friend. Now is the time.

"What about the lamp?" asked Kris in a small voice. She had a feeling that Sabrina was ready to pour her heart out, and she knew she couldn't stop now.

Sabrina looked at the lamp with a strange mingling of hatred and longing.

"It was my mother's favorite. She was in the hospital. We were expecting another baby." Sabrina smiled at the memory. "The designs are hers, she treated the cover like a canvas. She painted and painted for days, not coming out of her room for anything. I carried supper to her each night, and breakfast each morning. She wouldn't respond to me. I don't even know if she ate it." She closed her eyes. "You can hardly see it anymore, but this here is her signature." Still with closed eyes, she traced along the bottom of the lamp, stopping at rough edges and tracing them. She nodded to herself and held it out so that the Angels could see. "My father came out of her room and said she was finished, and she wanted to give it to me. I asked him why she couldn't give it to me herself." She opened her eyes, tears finally appearing, pouring out.

"He said that she was in a better place." Sabrina looked at Kelly when she said this. "It was going to be a boy."