Disclaimer: Insert any and all abasements you would like to see. I am far too busy and prideful to actually write them down.
Chance and Circumstance
Kurt watched as Hank expertly manipulated the scanner above the cot. The square of metal hummed and clicked to itself in a clinical manner as it scanned one Kitty Pryde of the X-men. Even as the men waited breathlessly, Kitty started to spasm once more…her body twitching on the bed and fighting the straps that Hank had laced about her.
The scanner clicked off and spewed out a report…which Hank ignored as he turned to grab a syringe. "Kurt, if you would be so kind as to hold her down while I inject this…" Kurt complied, using all of his weight to pin her upper chest and hold the arm still for Hank. Almost immediately Kitty calmed, her body flopping one last time and then returning to a supine state.
Kurt could barely stand to watch her…the dark circles under her eyes had spread, covering half her face. Her eyes were blood shot, making them almost crimson…he held back a sob as he gently stroked her hand with his tail "How bad is it mein fruend?"
Hank discarded the syringe and read the report, his eyes flicking over all the technical terms "…not good. It seems that not only did our now-free-of-possession telepath attack her thoughts…but bent her telekinesis upon the brain itself…I didn't believe that was possible while Kitty was phased…" He shook his head thoughtfully "She has suffered some severe nerve damage…I bet her thinking is incredibly fragmented as well…there has been some light hemorrhaging…she is in effect, suffering from several small strokes at the moment. The good news is…with her mutant metabolism and all around physical condition…the damage is already starting to be repaired. The seizures should stop by late this evening if I'm any judge of things…as for her earlier spectacle…our Kitten is not the type to give up easily. I am willing to bet that the phasing was an accident…" He pushed his glasses up and looked at the terrified Kurt "She will live Kurt. And she will recover…it will just take time." Hank patted Kurt on the shoulder and left the room.
Kurt swallowed a lump in his throat and sank down to his knees by the bed "Oh katzchen…"
* * * * *
She awoke once more…disoriented and hurting. But she didn't panic…someone was nearby, stroking her hand soothingly and whispering. She tried to place the voice, but the name floated just out of reach…she couldn't bring herself to believe Pete had come back…and he was the only one who had ever… She opened her eyes, they felt swollen and bruised…but she opened them anyway. Kurt was beside the bed, he seemed worried. "Wh…at's…rong…el…f…?" She had trouble moving her tongue and forming words, but she tried anyway.
He glanced at her with his stunning yellow eyes and blinked "You're awake katzchen…" He gently stroked hair off her face. She saw his blood crusted shirt and winced "You are very hurt…I expected you to sleep longer."
From the way she felt, she was more than just badly injured "N…not …telling …me?"
He correctly interpreted her question and hung his head "You've been having seizures all day…bleeding…Herr Hank said you are going to recover…earlier you phased out of the bed…you scared me…you scared us all…"
She closed her eyes and sighed mentally "Oh great. Now I've gone and hurt him…why can't I do anything right?" She thought to herself.
He continued, oblivious to her inner monologue "Hank theorized that the seizures are also shorting your powers…he thinks that you'll have to rebuild control again, just like after the Morlock tunnels…."
She held back tears, it had been so hard the first time…and she had hated people looking at her with pity when she dropped something…and now she would have to do it again?! She turned her head fractionally to block out the sight of Kurt as he stared at her worriedly. She didn't want him to see the shame and pain in her eyes…didn't want to see him offer comfort as a friend, or a leader…
* * * * *
Kurt stood and fetched another blanket to tuck around Kitty when she turned her head from him…he couldn't truly blame her. She was such a strong person…being helpless never sat well with her. But he was here for her…he was just afraid it wouldn't be enough.
He remembered the last time her powers had failed her, after the Morlock tunnels…she had worked so hard…alone. He had been too wrapped up in his own injuries and his own grief over the loss of the X-men to help her…and she had pulled through. "And why would she expect help from you after that? You let her slog through pain, misery, and even the realization of near death alone…she has learned to depend on no one…she certainly doesn't need you…" His mind jeered at him as he cleaned up the lab a bit. "And she certainly doesn't want you." Sometimes…just sometimes… he hated himself.
* * * * *
Kitty tried to piece her thoughts together in a coherent string after facing the wall…it felt like her mind was in a million splintery pieces…all crushing into each other and separating into further shards. "I have to stay…here…in the mansion for awhile…why? Oh yes" A picture of a wedding swam into focus "The girls are getting married…I'm in the wedding…So is Kurt…"
"Speak of the devil…" she felt him tuck a blanket securely under her chin, stroking her hair out of the way to get the edges tucked correctly…the tickle of fur on her bare shoulder distracted her for a moment…but she focused once more on her inner mindscape. "Jean attacked me…Jean was bad?" Her brow furrowed in concentration "Jean was…is bad?" She recalled several half-dreams involving Jean Grey…most of them twisted and sinister. "I don't think I like Jean anymore…" She waited for sadness to follow that realization…but there was none.
She shrugged mentally "To all things an end…" One thing was for certain…if Jean was bad, Kitty couldn't stay here. If her current condition was anything to go by, Jean was not happy with her. What she needed now was a safe haven…and it was slowly becoming clear to her that Xavier's was no longer such a place.
She racked her brain, her body beginning to phase and spread out minutely like fog…fog. Scotland. Muir Island. Her home away from home. Residence of her friend Rahne MacTaggert…and the late Moira as well as the place she had rebuilt her powers at last time…the pieces fell into place. She was leaving. She fell into sleep smiling.
* * * * *
Kurt drifted through the kitchen like a wraith; it was early morning, but still too early for even the likes of Ororo to be up. He bleakly filled a cup with hot water and set a tea bag to steeping. It had been a long evening, but Kitty was truly stable now…he rested his head on the cool counter top. Kitty…he could feel her withdrawing, centering herself away from everyone. She was donning her armor and preparing to do battle while he was left watching…
She was preparing herself in ways he could ever understand…and he hated himself for not being able to. All around him, the team was budding off…leaving. Logan and Jubilee were opening a secondary school after their honeymoon…Remy and Rogue were to run the family business in New Orleans…the team was dieing. And Kitty, the last bit left for him to treasure…was upstairs, injured, and he could do nothing.
In a fit of anger he slammed his fist on the counter, making the cup jump and slosh. He glanced around guiltily and cleaned the mess "I have to keep better control than this…leadership is falling to me…but God, I have let so many down…especially those I care for…" He stood and satretched, his tail curling, kinks working themselves out. This time he would do things right…he wouldn't leave Kitty alone…not this time. Never again if he had his way…he grinned at that last thought "As if such an incredible woman would bind herself to me without even knowing my feelings…" He shook his head sadly. "As if…" It was the upcoming wedding, it was making him melancholy…outside, the sun started to stain the world in red, and he heard the faint grumbling of wedding guests waking up.
* * * * *
Chapter three! Tah-dah! Hey, and come check out a really cool X-men message board complete with RPG…the link is on my profile page!