Chapter 406, guys! Sorry it took so long! Oh and for the first time a disclaimer!
Disclaimer: If I owned Bleach, don't you think the storyline would have been like these chapters?
Ichigo Kurosaki stared speechless at his father.
"When the hell did you know how to use Getsuga Tenshou? I thought that was my attack!" He shouted at his father, Isshin Kurosaki.
"You wanted the information later, remember? You're going to have to wait." Isshin half-sang as he stared at where Aizen was.
"It's your own fault, you know." Ichimaru Gin said, sounding very sympathetic. "You did say that you could wait."
Ichigo looked down at the cards he was holding. "Whatever. I hate life anyways. What game are we playing?"
Gin smoothly held his hand of cards as he gestured at the table they had somehow managed to acquire.
"Speed. And you've lost seventeen times in the last eight minutes. And Kurosaki, you're already dead."
"We were playing?"
Meanwhile Urahara came up to where Isshin was.
"How did it go?" He asked.
"How am I supposed to know? The smoke hasn't cleared yet and apparently I can't read Aizen while he's in that form!" Isshin snarled. "You're the researcher, aren't you? Why don't you know anything?"
Urahara smiled behind his ever-present fan.
"I'm curious at why Aizen needs a fairy godmother ball. Do you think he had a depressed childhood or something?"
"Maybe it's because he's the only one stupid and childish enough to want a fairy god-ball." Yoruichi, the only other person fighting commented.
"Anyways, what were you saying about not being able to read him, Isshin?" Urahara asked.
"What you haven't noticed? That trash bag suit is hiding his reitsu. And made him stronger. Why do the hideous, god-awful looking outfits always make the person who's trying to take over the world become stronger? Why can't it be a nice looking outfit for once?" Isshin complained.
"What on Earth are you talking about, Isshin?" Yoruichi asked, bemused.
"Forget it."
Both Isshin and Urahara turned when they heard the definite sound of a footstep landing on air. Because it has such a loud, distinct noise, everyone knows that.
"That was a good attack." Aizen the walking trash bag said as appeared to be unscathed. At Isshin and Urahara's glares he stopped walking.
"Oh come on. You can't possibly think that would finish me off!"
They still glared.
"…You guys really thought that. I'm shocked."
"Actually we hoped it would finish you off so we wouldn't have to deal with you anymore." Isshin muttered.
"How mean. Anyways, I understand your attack now." Aizen swooned dramatically.
"What the hell is going on in that stupid head of his?" Isshin grumbled.
"I think it is time for you to understand my power too." Unbeknownst to anyone, except for himself, Aizen was smirking.
"Can't you just tell us then? It would make things so much more simpler." Urahara interjected.
"No. Now, watch my ascend into Godhood!" Everyone stared as Aizen's head cracked open and a white light consumed him.
"Should you really be looking behind you?" Gin asked of Ichigo.
"Well, why wouldn't I? It's not like we're doing anything." Ichigo retorted.
"Yes we are!" Gin said. "You are done for!" Somehow the table that they were using to play speed disappeared and Gin jumped away from Ichigo, his zanpakto ready in his hands.
"What the hell are you doing, Gin?" Ichigo questioned. He knew Gin had problems, major problems, but still.
"You are no longer a soldier. Not a shinigami, not a hollow, not human." Gin recited.
"We were playing a fucking card game! Why are you being so dramatic all of a sudden?"
"Do you really think someone as half-assed as yourself can beat him when those three can't?"
"Beat who? Aizen? Well, I don't know exactly what's going on anymore since you're acting all insane again!"
Gin's grin got even wider, if that was possible.
"Go ahead and run. I wouldn't put it against you. You don't want to die yet, do you?"
"What happened to the I'm already dead thing?"
"Eh, forget that for right now and listen to my speech!" Gin shouted. "I have no interest in you." Gin continued.
"Liar." Ichigo muttered. "If you had no interest in me then we wouldn't have played cards."
"Shut up. I'm making my own speech for once, and your going to listen to it."
"NO! The last speech that someone uttered to me was traumatizing enough with his sexual preferences. I don't need to have any more nightmares!"
Ignoring Ichigo, Gin continued to speak.
"Captain Aizen will be disappointed in you, too. You're scared, aren't you?"
"LALALALALA, I CAN'T HEAR YOU! LALALALALA!" Putting his hands over his ears, Ichigo attempted to ignore Gin. And we all know that never works.
"Of Captain Aizen? You've grasped his power!" Gin somehow made himself heard over Ichigo's chanting.
"Shut up! I'm not listening to you!"
"Well, that's the last warning I'll give." Gin finished readying his sword.
"How many times are you going to warn me?" Ichigo asked, having unfortunately, heard everything Gin said. "And how the hell do you figure I'm scared? Aizen is using a Disney theme to take over the world, damnit!"
"Meh, it was just a speech. Don't need to get so testy over it."
"Hang on, Gin. Are you like Severus Snape from Harry Potter?" Ichigo asked, as he spotted something in a pocket of Gin's clothing out of the corner of his eye.
"Uh, no. Why do you ask?"
"Because you keep giving me all these warnings and never actually do anything afterwards. And I just caught a glimpse of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows in your pocket." Ichigo said dryly.
"So, I like Snape! He's a cool character. And what's wrong if I enjoy Harry Potter so much that I carry it with me wherever I go?"
"Snape dies in that book."
"Shut up, it never happened! And neither did the epilogue!"
"…Ok." Ichigo whispered, not wanting to antagonize the crazed Harry Potter fan.
A bright light ceased any other conversation that would have occurred between the two. Both turned to look around and saw Aizen walking towards them. From around Aizen's approaching form, Ichigo saw his Dad and the two other fighters down.
"Dad, Urahara-san, Yoruichi-san. Wait, why am I being respectful again! Damnit!" Ichigo screamed before smashing his fist to his head several times.
"Gin." Aizen commanded royally, in his opinion anyway. "What were you going to do to him?"
Gin smiled at Aizen innocently. (Around the world, puppies died, as Gin is never innocent.)
"Nothing. I was just testing him."
"Very well. Open the Senkaimon. I will invade Karakura in Soul Society." Aizen degreed as he turned around to face the open sky. Behind him, Ichigo and Gin were muffling their laughs at his attitude.
"Sure, boss." Gin finally said, getting a hold of himself. "But what's a Senkai-thingy?" Next to him, Ichigo had put a fist in his mouth to stop chuckling. As soon as Aizen turned to look at them though, he was straight-faced.
"The gate, Gin."
"Oh, sure. Why didn't you just say so?" Gin giggled before opening the gate-thingy.
"Aizen, your head is falling off."
"Shut up, Kurosaki. This was not my head, it was a covering my head. Think of this fabulous suit as a cocoon."
"So, you are comparing yourself to a butterfly. Gay."
"It's not gay! Now I can see Soul Society's downfall with my own eyes!"
"Are you telling me, that you couldn't see when you were in that suit? Then how they hell did those three get defeated?" Ichigo shouted at Aizen.
"Actually, they were all tired, so they fell asleep." Aizen revealed as his head piece finally came off to reveal Aizen,…with longer hair.
"Was that your epic transformation? You got longer hair?"
"You should watch Dragon Ball Z, Kurosaki. Then you will understand. And now, I will leave you here and I will eat you Kurosaki." Aizen stepped into the glowing gate and Gin followed.
"WHAT THE - #^&(*^%#%^^&&**^$!$%^&*(*^*#&(&($_+)#^&!" Ichigo screamed before staring at the place where Aizen just was.
"Ichigo! What did I tell you about language? Why are you just standing there? Open the Senkaimon, now!" Isshin ordered as he woke up due to Ichigo's yelling.
"Dad, that fucking pedophile stalker is also a cannibal! I am not going anywhere near him, thank you very much!" Ichigo whimpered, feeling utterly disgusted at Aizen's obsession with him.
"Let's go protect Karakura town!" Isshin cheered, leaning on his son's shoulder.
"Did you not hear a word of what I just said?" Ichigo cried. "Aizen wants to eat me! In a sexual way or as a cannibal I don't know, but he wants to eat me!"
"Shut up and let's go, Ichigo. You can complain later."
"But!"
"Shut up and I won't ground you for an entire year after this."
"Shutting up."