Chapter 23
Tick
Santa Cruz, California
May 7, 1987
11:23 a.m.
Kitty sighed.
Kitty couldn't believe the stuff that Steven had accumulated over the years that he didn't realize he had or what
came with the house, which made Kitty wonder who lived here for before him? It must have been a family with
all of the unopened appliances that were in the cupboards. She was surprised that he didn't come out for a
fresh warm-out-of-the-oven-chewy cookie. She found a nice silver metal tin, it had silver snowflakes designed on
it, and the printed on label on the bottom said they used to contain butter cookies, it might have been May, but
who cared?
It was a pretty tin and Holly would appreciate it. On her store list was 2 boxes of Cut-Rite Wax Paper
that she needed to line the tin with. Her Steven didn't complain, he went to the store for her and then said he
had to "do something." She wished that there was a ribbon or bow to finish the presentation.
Her mind tried to flashback to the good times when Eric, Steven, Jackie, and the rest of their friends would hang
out in the basement and when she was off from the hospital, whether it be her day off, or from one their
breaks. She always made sure to have homemade goodies for the kids. She was proud that for a brief shining
moment it was her house that the neighborhood kids flocked to; she was the cool Mom on the block. When Red
would come home tired from work and the kids were off doing their brand of mischief, she would let him have a
treat before supper.
It was best to keep your man happy in all of the rooms in the house, but Kitty felt, it was the
kitchen where she excelled, it was her sanctuary, maybe if she had made some effort in Sarasota to give Red
more comfort he'd still be alive today.
Now was not the time to cry, she had to finish Holly's cookie tin. It really was starting to worry her, why Hyde
wasn't making his presence known. Maybe, he was taking a nap; she knew it was difficult for him to get a good
night's sleep.
This always happened.
Hyde was on his side, tired, exhausted was more like it, and yet when he would try to sleep, he couldn't. When
he tried to not focus his mind, he was betrayed, the mosquito hadn't pestered him lately and nothing was
revealed in his dreams other than a stark blackness. He held his pillows and ignored the grinding, the absolute
grinding sounds, that were starting to come to the surface again. It was like when you were a little kid at
Funland, with your best friend and his parents, because your own parents couldn't be bothered. You were in the
front roller coaster car, because it was funny to see your best friend freak out over the ride, and the tick-tick-tick
of the chain as you went up the track that was in his mind multiplied by 1000. There was no release like when
the car goes down the hill and you scream out of relief, or fear mixed with vomit if you were Forman, there was
no satisfaction, just the grinding tick-tick-tick sound that played in your head like a LP that skipped in the
groove. It could go on for infinity until someone or something stopped it. Sid was awake as Hyde was facing him,
what a good companion to stay and never complain. He knew he had to get up or his Mom would come in here
and check on him and he didn't want to be checked-on, yet he didn't want her to leave.
He sat on the edge of the bed and that's how far he got, it was easier to get lost in spending time with his dog
than being reward with cookies. He knew what she was going to make as the only ingredients that he had in
the house already were the peanut butter and eggs. It was a silent torture to go to the grocery store during
normal morning hours, but he did it for his Mother. Kitty Forman was sweet, provided that you didn't cross her;
she was known to hold a grudge with her family until they smartened up. So Hyde wondered why was he
getting off relatively scott-free for avoiding the family for 8 years and missing Jackie and Red during their final
moments?
How come she wasn't screaming at him? Kitty Forman should be absolutely livid at Steven Hyde, but yet, he still
wanted her to stay here, for keeps.
And it wasn't just about her…..
Sid cried and Hyde knew he had no choice; he had to get up to face the moment for the second time today.
2 hours later
Holly felt ashamed.
She wasted a lot of money in the space of a few hours. What do women do on their vacation from work? They
shop. Or at least she didn't really until she had a boyfriend and realized how stupid she looked in preppy polo
shirts and khaki's. It looked very uniform, which was more than how the modern nurse's uniform looked in
comparison. She went out of her comfort zone. She was going to have to return all of the pink, v-neck sweaters,
shoes with kitten heels, and her first push-up bra, not that she needed help in that area; it was the principle of
the purchase. It was wasted money on clothes that were out of her safety zone. What was she thinking? She
took her keys out of her purse and blushed about 1000 shades of pink when she noticed her boyfriend, she did
like the sound of that, her boyfriend, knocking at her door, holding a silver tin. It was futile attempt of trying to
hide the shopping bags behind her back and she felt like throwing them in the elevator before the doors closed.
"Hi, Holly." Hyde turned around, he smelled her perfume.
She smiled, "Hi, Steve…what's in the tin?"
"What's behind your back?"
She tossed him the keys, then realized that might have been a very insensitive thing to do. Give her a medical
crisis and she was fine, but socializing with a man, her boyfriend, and she felt like she was a bumbling idiot.
"Sorry…..Open the door." She was going to have to throw these bags on the bed; he couldn't see all of the
wrong things that she had purchased. Men didn't have these issues they wore very casual clothes or business
suits, pick something from those two sections of the store and be done with it. It was so different and personal
when a woman went shopping.
"It's okay." He did manage to catch them with one hand and wondered why was she so embarrassed?
"…to answer your question just things that have to go back to the store."
He opened the door with her keys. There was that issue…he couldn't ask, not yet; they just vowed to take it
slow with each other. Hyde wouldn't put pressure on her. It was ironic, when he was younger, he never would
want to ask such a question and now it was on his mind for a while. It wasn't about the sex; he respected her
reasons and decisions as to wait. It was about building something.
Hyde let her walk in first, those lessons came from the Forman's certainly not his poor excuse of a family. Holly
kissed Hyde on the cheek. "Why did you shave your moustache off?"
"Just felt like it….." and hated that ever present buzzing sound of the razor, "to answer your other
question….Mom made cookies."
"What kind?"
"Peanut butter chocolate chip."
"I think I love Kitty….I'll meet you in the kitchen….."
Holly walked to her small little bedroom. The kind of room, even though this was her own apartment, where you
could only dream about your boyfriend, you couldn't bring him back here.
She opened up the plastic bag that was inside the silver mall shopping bag with the white handles, first the cost
of the sweater could buy a weeks worth of groceries and it didn't seem right, it had a pretty low kind of v-neck.
Girl's like her didn't wear push-up bras. They were definitely going to go back to the store tomorrow.
She put the little bag back inside the big one and took a deep breath before entering the kitchen.
"Miss me?" she asked
Hyde took the liberty of pouring 2 small glasses of milk and found a plate in the dish rack to put the cookies on.
"Always…" He pulled her close, so that she would sit on his lap.
Where was that little mosquito and her love advice? He could feel a slight headache forming; he just wanted to
stay in the present with his girlfriend.
He broke a cookie in half and handed it to her, "Have a cookie, Cookie."
Did he just give her a nickname?
"Hmm, these are very good…..I don't suppose Kitty used healthy ingredients…"
"Then I can tell you they wouldn't taste this good. What did you buy at the store today?"
"Nothing…it's all going back…"
Holly liked sitting on Hyde's lap, she wasn't that timid to deny that she liked how that felt very much.
"Why?"
"They were just the wrong clothes…."
Should she be one of those girls and just kiss her boyfriend as to change the subject? No, she didn't want to
manipulate their touch in anyway.
"I don't get it." Hyde admitted
"They weren't the right clothes for a woman like me….." She felt that she was revealing too much as it were.
"What does a woman like you wear?"
She stood up not knowing if she should run off or wash her hands in the sink.
"Holly, what is it?"
He stood up as well, ignoring his own pounding headache, the cookies probably weren't good for that, but they
were his favorite and he hadn't had them in 9 years. Hyde put his hands on Holly's shoulders. They were as stiff
as his.
"Nothing," she wasn't going to cry over something that she felt was very trivial, "I bought clothes today that
weren't what I normally buy. You don't understand, Steve. You're a guy. I wanted to be pretty for you…but I
failed miserably." That did it, the tears started to flow out of her blue-gray eyes.
He turned her around to face him.
"Holly, you are very pretty….."
"You have to say that…."
Accepting compliments were hard; they were difficult for him before any of that mess started. Not with the guys,
they joked around, burned each other in the figurative sense. Guys don't compliment really, unless there was
some kind of crisis going on. But those first years getting to know Mrs. Forman, Mom, being thrown in a bubble
bath with Eric, eating the first homemade cookie, and getting the first hug from her were hard to accept, he
wished he could go back to that time, so his little body could appreciate someone loving him.
"I mean what I say…you're gorgeous…." He didn't want to bring up the night of what was the rejection dinner,
but Holly was stunning with her hair down and her dark royal blue dress, come to think of it, if Jackie wore that
dress with the spaghetti straps, she wouldn't have fastened the middle part in the front with a pin. It was a nice
pin, it was a silver swirl with clear crystals….he was starting to understand what she was getting at. She was
wrong, but he understood where she was coming from. This was the reason why he tried breaking up with her.
He was the inferior one. Not her. She thought she was the inferior one. Not him.
They were both wrong.
"No, I'm not….."
"We can play this game all day, and sorry, Cookie, you're going to lose…why don't you let me see you in one of
your outfits before you decide to take them back to the store?"
He kissed her on the lips.
She sighed, "Okay…do you want to watch a movie? I promise no Lifetime."
Hyde laughed, "We can watch whatever you want…."
Where was the mosquito to tell him that he was doing a great job? And that he and Holly were a great couple?
Where was his encouragement?
Holly couldn't bring herself to wear the push-up bra; maybe, she could save it for when they actually went
around one of the so-called bases. She wasn't lacking in that area, so it would be okay to skip that step. Should
she wear the pink v-neck, that would mean she'd have to take off the bra she was currently wearing because it
was too big and thick and the v-cut was too low, she did have a white camisole in her drawer that she bought
on impulse last year, maybe she could wear that, and the little ruffled edges would be a nice little buffer with
the plunging neckline. She couldn't go braless, the '70s were over. Now her khaki pants didn't match, she'd have
to wear the gray skirt. It was flowy, less industrial than the skirts she normally would purchase, and with no
stockings, there was no turning back now. She took off her socks and settled on the new light pink kitten heels.
This was not her kind of look at all, but at least the scalloped camisole made her feel more at ease then
if she didn't have that security barrier. Holly put on some more of her perfume; it was Avon's Pearls & Lace and
hoped for the best.
Hyde didn't want Holly to feel even more self-conscious so he sat down and turned on the TV.
The Price is Right was on and that made him think of Jackie, he put the mute button on, he figured they could
decide on a movie together. He almost dropped the remote control on the floor when Holly came into the living
room.
This was what was she worried about?
"This is what you were worried about? You look beautiful, Holly and I'm going to keep telling you so, until you
believe me."
"I think it's too much….." she sat next to him on the sofa.
She kicked off her heels so she could put her legs up on his. "Did you find something good on TV?"
Hyde smiled, "I'm sure I can find something….but I much prefer being in the company of a beautiful woman such
as yourself…."
"Thank you, Steve….."
They snuggled into each other on the sofa and they never did find anything to watch on TV for the rest of the
afternoon.
Author's Note: Thanks to Marla's Lost who was my Beta for this chapter and who along with nannygirl lets
me bounce ideas around. I appreciate it.