Hey! I'm back!
Sorry for the wait. Hope this makes it up to you!
And thanks again to my lovely beta, lioness's heart.
Warning: Bloodhound spoilers, for those of you who are late to the action.
Yellow: Warmth; Joy; Friendship
The events at Port Caynn had already been forgotten, yet for Beka, it would take a long time for them to fade. She should be feeling happy, she knew that- she was once again a hero, tacking on the name of 'Bloodhound' to her list of accomplishments- but somehow a deep feeling of guilt coursed through her. It was especially evident whenever she saw Rosto- and she knew it was because of him.
He had made his feelings known, time and again, how he felt for her. But Beka, young and foolish as she was, had ignored him. She had just assumed that he would eventually give up on her, or worse, continue to wait.
She didn't want him to hurt himself for her sake.
He tried to put forth an effort into making things the same. They both did. They still spoke during breakfast, exchanged polite nods during the Happy Bag discussions, and were polite whenever they happened across each other, but it wasn't the same. There was a rift between them, now. A span of time and distance that they couldn't cross, didn't know how to. They still enjoyed the other's company, but not as keenly as before. Everyone could tell that, even when in the same room, they were oceans apart.
She may have been a hero to Corus, but when it came to Rosto, Beka felt like the very Rats she had brought to justice. She had committed a crime against Rosto that would never be forgotten, if ever forgiven. All those times she had said she couldn't be distracted, couldn't mix duty and love, fell out the window during her first taste of freedom. She had betrayed both of them- personally, she wouldn't blame him if he ended up calling off their companionship altogether.
That was what it was now, she had realized. Companionship. They were acquaintances, two people who liked being around each other, but not more than necessary. Whenever the time was up, they migrated elsewhere, letting someone else fill in the space between them. It was easier that way. Their friends didn't deserve to be caught in the cross-fires of this particular battle of wills.
It was Midsummer when they finally broached the subject. If Beka had had her way, they wouldn't have run into each other at all- but fate had other plans.
She and Tunstall had been asked to pull double-duty, since they were the few crazy enough to agree. No one really expected anything to happen on the holiday, but celebrations were breeding grounds for pickpockets and drunkards. It was required that a minimum of at least a dozen patrols were on duty during the event, and it was only with reluctance that Goodwin gave them the order to do so in the first place.
"Cooper, I know you want to spend the day with your friends, but I can't find anyone else who will do the job half as well." She had said. "My only consolation is that it's informal, so you can take your time going anywhere. You can even join in if you want, so long as you keep your eyes and ears open."
"We know you tried your best, Clary," Tunstall had said. He had been looking forward to spending the time with Sabine- the lady knight had taken off this day especially for him, and now that he was on duty after all she wouldn't be pleased. Beka could relate. After all, she had promised to spend the day with her siblings.
They dropped by Lord Gershom's house first so Beka could break the news to her siblings, who were understandably disappointed but accepting. They did have time to exchange gifts, however. Lorine gave Beka a new cloak, a handsome thing of pale blue silk embroidered with silver doves and flowers. Willes gave her a beaded bracelet, and Nilo ecstatically gave her a matching set of earbobs. Diona, of course, had not deemed her older sister worthy enough for a gift- but Beka had included a small velvet purse that she knew Diona would like, making her three youngest siblings swear that they would never tell Diona who had gotten it, whether she guessed right or not. It was easy enough- all of them knew Diona would never accept a gift from Beka, or, if she did, she would never use it. Lorine assured her that they would say they bought it last-minute during the festival. After saying their farewells and letting her siblings lavish more love on Achoo, they left.
That done, they tracked down Sabine, who was waiting for Tunstall outside the Mantel and Pullet. She wasn't upset with Tunstall; instead, she turned her fury on Goodwin.
"Mithros! I swear I'm going to kill that woman!" She roared, trying to push past Tunstall. "You just got better!"
"And I'm grateful that I can go back on duty! You know I've been driven nearly to insanity with nothing to do!" Tunstall soothed, holding her back with all his strength. "Sabine, I don't mind, really… you can join us, if you want. All we're doing is walking…"
Beka let the couple be, wandering a short distance away from Tunstall and watching the crowds pass. She envied them. She had wanted to dress up today as well, but instead she found herself in her uniform once more. She loved her job, but sometimes, it really wasn't worth it.
Sabine had finally calmed down, and agreed to join them on their 'Watch'. Acting like a pair of newlyweds, they exclaimed over every attraction there was, leaving Beka feeling thoroughly sour within minutes. Crossly, she began to swing her baton in a few patterns some Port Caynn Dogs had showed her, staring moodily about in the crowds. Achoo wasn't so emotional. She adored festivals, and was trying to smell as much as possible while it lasted. Her nose was permanently in the air, quivering with excitement.
A group of Rats huddling in the alley attracted her attention. Though this was hardly uncommon, the fact that they were passing something invisible amongst themselves with occasional glances at the crowd sent alarm bells ringing in her head. Casually, she leaned over to inspect a few ribbons, the group in her peripheral vision. They were definitely suspicious- she followed them with her eyes when they exited the alley, acting too casual for innocence as they descended upon a group of nobles. Seconds later cries of 'Thief! Thief!' cut through the air, but Beka was already chasing after them.
One she caught almost immediately, smacking him smartly on the head for the nobles to deal with before chasing after the other three. Another she caught not ten yards later as he ran into a person exiting a bakery at the same time- she let Tunstall deal with that one. The other two were smarter. They split, one heading into an alley, the other into the crowd.
She hesitated, and then chased after the one in the alley. He would be easier to chase down, and she would rather lose one than both. Achoo easily staying up with her, she twisted through the backstreets of Corus, slowly gaining on the Rat.
They were just outside of Prettybone District when the Rat suddenly collapsed, gasping for breath. Rosto stood in front of him, eyebrows raised- one arm was extended, where the Rat had run into it. Achoo barked, happy to see the Rouge. Beka only nodded, taking out her leather straps. After a word from Beka, Achoo leaped over to Rosto. He crouched down to pet her, eyes on her handler.
"I didn't know you were working today," he said, and Beka shrugged, hauling the Rat up to bring him to the nearest cage dogs. "Wasn't supposed to." She replied. "Goodwin had other plans, though."
He nodded, falling into step beside her- just like Achoo, she noticed wryly. "Look, I know things have been… sketchy, between us recently." He said. Beka snorted. That was obvious. Ignoring her, he continued. "And I miss how it was. I've been thinking a lot these past three weeks, and I realize that I just can't keep up this indifferent act anymore."
"I can't, either," She said after a lengthy pause. "You're a good friend, Rosto the Piper- too good a friend. I don't want that to change."
He nodded. "Me neither. What happened in Port Caynn, between you and… that man… hurt me, but it was your decision. I can't punish you for it." He reached into his pocket, pulling out a yellow rose, not crushed in the least, despite the fact it had been in there since early that morning. "So, what do you say? Are we friends?"
As Beka took the rose, she wanted to cry. Being with Dale had taught her something- she wanted love. She wanted to lie next to someone at night, feeling safe in their arms. She wanted someone to know every inch of her heart, to know her for who she was, and love her for it anyway. She wanted to be able to kiss someone with no qualms, hold their hand and spend a lazy evening under the setting sun. She wanted to feel special, like the luckiest girl in the world whenever she looked into her lover's eyes- and for them to feel the same whenever they looked into hers.
And, she knew now, she wanted that person to be Rosto.
"Just friends," She agreed, knowing it was too late. She had broken his heart once too much. It killed her that she had to break it to realize it herself, but some things she couldn't change. At least she still had his friendship- she vowed that she would treat that better.
After a soft 'thank-you', she left him, dragging the now-struggling Rat to the waiting cages, the rose safely behind one ear. Rosto stared after her, eyes bright with regret- he, too, still wished for more than friendship. For now, though, he would let Beka decide when he would proceed. It was the least he could do.
When Beka finally handed the Rat off to the cage dogs, Rosto had already left. Disappointed, but not necessarily surprised, she reached up to look at his rose once more. A bitter smile on her face, she moved to replace it, when she noticed a small slip of paper between the petals. Gently removing it, she read the words, a small shred of hope working its way into her heart.
I'm still waiting
Perhaps it wasn't too late after all. Placing the rose behind her ear once more she went to find Tunstall and Sabine, Achoo trotting faithfully at her heels. If Rosto hadn't given up hope, she wouldn't, either. "Midsummer luck, Rosto," She whispered, kissing the paper. Tucking it into her pocket, she tossed her head back and laughed, letting the joy of the festival work its magic. Sprinting off, she ran forwards to her future, the shadow of a Piper beside her every step of the way.
I like writing bittersweet chapters. I like writing fluffy chapters more, but bittersweet comes in a close second. I can connect with them a lot more; and since I've had a lot of bittersweet moments, it comes easier to me.
Hope you enjoyed! Please review, cause it makes me happy and happiness is a good thing!