I do not own Degrassi or any other characters utilized in this story

Nothing is ever what it seems

Chapter 5

Eli

That was how everything I ever had; I ever loved vanished between my fingers. It's so difficult now, without Julia it's as if I'm a tree without leaves, I no longer have any beauty to bloom in this world. I gently rub my face with soap; the bubbly sensation is heaven on my skin. In the mirror all I see is the most pathetic person…me

Wiping the water away with the towel I stepped into my room once again. The wood floor creaked as I walked; I let myself fall onto my bed and just stared at the ceiling for what felt like years. I began to remember the days before Julia's accident. I shook my head trying to make the thoughts disappear. I leaned over to my lamp stand, I picked up my cell phone and sent Adam a message.

Hey you need a ride? I changed quickly into my grey skinny jeans when I heard my phone

Buzz…Buzz…Buzz

You're up man…and is that a trick question? Of course I want a ride

I pulled myself down stairs, my mother's eyes lit up when she saw me take a seat in the counter.

"Hey, you're up honey" she said as she placed a plate of French toast and a glass of milk on the counter. "Yeah, I'm up mom" I replied, taking my first bite from the crusty bread. I chewed on the bread repeatedly, it felt good, I hadn't eaten since all of yesterday. I guess an empty stomach does not help much when you already have pain internally.

As I drove down to Adam's house everything felt out of place, as I steered to my right it felt foreign and I realized how much I had drowned myself in sorrow. I was going to try to complete my courses but forget Julia…never…I would never forget her…never.

"Hey man, nice to finally get a glimpse of my friend" Adam said gasping for air, he had obviously been running. Probably from his evil headmaster.

"Yeah it's nice to see you too" I said to Adam, a smile then began to dangle in my lips and Adam sent me a grin.

Adam quickly got into Morty, I had many questions to ask, what had happened in school, how had the teachers reacted to my absences, and what had everyone been saying about the accident.

I glanced at Adam for a minute, "Don't worry all the teachers said you were excused, Mr. Simpson really has a nice heart, and well no one has said a word about…Julia."

My eyes went frigid after Adam said her name, I felt as if my chest was beginning to crumble, my fingers wrapped themselves furiously around the steering wheel. After that all talking went cold, it was partially my fault, I wouldn't really talk, and I knew how much Adam was trying but nothing was the same, and I was not going to pretend.

I parked Morty in the school parking lot and waved to Adam as he rushed to his first period, which was Art. Letting out a long sigh, I began to walk to Degrassi, it felt like hell. In the hallways I could feel every kid stare at me, they were like knives piercing into my skin. Finally, I stood in front of the door for English, I opened the door and headed to my seat very fast, trying to avoid eye contact but as I reached for my seat I became aware someone was seated there. The whole class was whispering things and I was helplessly trying to cut out my hearing to avoid the information.

"Eli…umm just sit next to Ms. Edwards for today, now that Mr. Connor is absent" Mr. Benson said trying to decipher my emotions.

I quickly nodded, and walked to my seat, everything felt so unreal but the thing was that this is my reality.