Thanks to all of my reviewers! [Gives reviewers cookies] Here is my next chapter; hope you like it!

[Pokes myself] Nope, not two people, so I'm not the Erins. [Feels face] Nope, no beard, so I'm not George Lucas, either. [Pokes self again] Nope, not a band, so I'm not Bon Jovi.

Poppyfrost was taking a stroll through the beautiful woods, just like Millie had been only a sunrise before. However, she was doing a border patrol by herself. Out of the blue sprung an odd, black-clad cat.... thing. It didn't look like a cat, though. It just had the general shape of one.

"I AM DARTH VADER!" it proclaimed.

Poppyfrost blinked.

"Okay, good for you."

"Darth Vader" let out a mechanical huff.

"I am not actually Darth Vader; I am actually a cat."

"Then why did you say you were in the first place? And what the Dark Forest is with the thing you're wearing?!"

The cat thing waved its paw in front of Poppyfrost.

"You don't want to diss the suit."

"I don't want to diss the suit."

"You want to go home and tell the rest of the Jedi about me."

"I want to go home and tell the rest of the Jedi about you."

Poppyfrost went home to tell the rest of the Jedi about the Darth Vader poser.

"Mouse-brain," the poser scoffed when she left.

Poor Kestreltalon. All of WindClan --including him!-- was sick, and he didn't know what they had! Fortunately, he barely had it. They apparently had the same illness, but he was sure it wasn't greencough! Sure, every cat was coughing, but there were more symptoms. For example, Ashfoothad so many symptoms, she was a priority patient. Her nose was runny and stuffy, she had a sore throat, she had headaches, she had aches all over her body, she was frequently experiencing chills, she was always tired, she had a fever, and she occasionally vomited. What was a medicine cat to do? Desperate, he decided to go to ShadowClan territory. The cats there would help him!

Kestreltalon shivered as he reached the old ShadowClan camp.

"Hello?" his voice wavered. It was weak from the sickness.

Ratscar, wearing eccentric loops of grass with a huge ball of moss hanging down from the middle of the loop, stalked out from behind a bush.

"Yo, cat. Whadda ya hafta do wit us, da Sith?"

Kestreltalon coughed.

"Huh?"

"Whadda ya want, cat?"

"My whole Clan is sick! I've never seen a sickness like what they have before! I need your help! Please!"

"Get lost, yo. We Sith don't wanna cetch yo nasty germs."

"You don't wanna what whose nasty germs?"

"Cetch. Yo. We don't wanna catch your germs. Got that, noob?"

The little cat's eye quivered.

"Uh-huh...."

He shot back off out of the territory.

"Yeah, you betta run, yo!" Ratscar shouted after him. To himself, he nudged his loops of grass with his nose and added, "I gotta get me some more bling, yo!"

Finally, Kestreltalon reached ThunderClan territory. He knew for sure Firestar would help him! Firestar would help anybody!

"Hi, Kestreltalon!" Hollyleaf greeted when she saw him in the camp. "Wait, what are you doing on our territory you're from WindClan omigosh you shouldn't be here you're disobeying the Warrior Code!"

"I need help," Kestreltalon said. He sniffled.

"Help, you need?" Yoda questioned.

The sick cat nodded fervently.

"All of WindClan is sick, and I'm not sure what's wrong with them! Could you help me?"

"Help you, I can not."

Kestreltalon sighed.

"But help you, Leafpool may."

"Oh, thank you, Firestar, thank you!"

"Yoda! Yoda, my name is!"

But Kestreltalon couldn't hear him. He was already in Leafpool's den. Jayfeather was busy eating a muffin.

"Leafpool, Kestreltalon's here," he said, though it sounded like "Weafpwool, Keftriltawin's ear," since his mouth was full of banana nut muffin.

"What? Oh, hi, Kestreltalon! Does WindClan need any herbs? How may I help you?"

"Um, how do you cure a sickness with these symptoms:"

Kestreltalon listed everything while Leafpool tried to pay attention. There were so many! She thought about them for a while, but couldn't think of anything.

"Sorry, Kestreltalon, I have no idea what to do! Well, what you could do is make a poultice of herbs and remedies for all the different symptoms."

"That could work! Thanks, Leafpool!"

Kestreltalon was filled with a sudden energy as he ran back to WindClan. Off he went through the moors until he got back to camp. Lucky for him, no cat had died. He got to work immediately. He put on his apron, took out his wooden spoon and steel pot, and began to stir up a poultice. But wait! There was something missing! He never mixed poultices without music! Quickly, he pushed a button on his radio, and his favorite rock song from the 1980s blared from the speakers.

"Ah, much better," he sighed. "Now, catmint for coughing...."

"And chervil roots for bellyache...."

"Feverfew for fever and chills...."

"Honey for sore throats...."

Reluctantly, Kestreltalon used up the last of his honey for the poultice. Hopefully, he could find more.

Whoa we're halfway there

Livin' on a prayer

Take my hand, and we'll make it; I swear

Livin' on a prayer....

Kestreltalon loved that song. But the rest of WindClan didn't. Strangely enough, at the time, the Clan was too sick to force him to turn it off.

"Juniper berries for bellyache additionally..."

"Lavender for the fever also..."

"Watermint... Hmm, what about tansy? Maybe I'll add a little bit when I administer it to the Clan."

Kestreltalon finished his poultice.

"Onnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssstttttttttttttaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr," he called.

"What?" The leader coughed weakly.

"I have a poultice to help you!"

Onestar slowly took the poultice. He swallowed it, but he coughed once he had.

"This tastes like paws!"

"It's going to, and how do you know what paws taste like?"

"Never mind that, just cure the rest of the Clan."

So Kestreltalon did. He hoped Leafpool's idea worked...

The Senate was bored. Ultimately, they were disappointed by the rest of the cats' lack of excitement to the first rule ever made by the Senate. Chancellor Blackstar was busy droning on and on about how ungrateful those not in the Senate were and how without the Senate, every cat would slowly descend into anarchy, blah blah blah. Most of the Senate was actually pretending to listen, though Breezepelt and Crowfeather had dozed off hours ago, almost as soon as Chancellor Blackstar's speech had started. Taking a very risky chance in interrupting Blackstar, Mistyfoot spoke out:

"Hey, how about we make a law that every cat should have to be excited about every law that the Senate makes?"

Blackstar, originally miffed at the interruption, looked awed.

"Fantastic idea, Senator Mistyfoot! That idea has given you a raise!"

"But... you don't pay us."

"Well, then, extra fish for you! Nightcloud! Catch Senator Mistyfoot some extra fish for her raise!"

"Yes, sir."

Blackstar had forced Nightcloud to be his personal assistant instead of serving in the Senate. He thought Nightcloud being below someone in a situation like the Senate would be good for her.

"Wait, sir?"

"Yeah? What is it?" Blackstar sounded annoyed.

"I don't know how to fish."

"You don't know how to fish? Tsk, tsk, tsk, then LEARN."

Nightcloud took that as her cue to leave.

"Senators, go spread the new law!"

The Senators had no choice but to go spread the law.

Meanwhile, in ThunderClan, Lionblaze just knew something was wrong with Berrynose telling him to go train all the time. Angry, he dragged his claws down a tree. Suddenly, Yellowfang descended from a cloud shaped like the letters "S" and "C" conjoined.

"Young Skywalker, I sense you sense something wrong."

"What?"

"I know that you know that something is wrong."

"Yeah. Something IS wrong. Berrynose is training me, but I feel like I'm not supposed to right now!"

"You are right. The thing is, in the first Star Wars movie, The Phantom Menace, Anakin only starts his training at the end of the movie. In this time frame, we're barely at the middle."

"Oh."

"So, before you go, here's what I want you to do:

"One, tell Berrynose to stop telling you train. Say that I said that.

"Two, tell Brambleclaw that he's Mace Windu. Say that I said that.

"And three, tell Sorreltail that she gets unlimited store credit at The StarClan Shop. Say that I said that."

"What's The StarClan Shop?" Lionblaze queried.

"It's our store that we just opened. It sells all kinds of cool stuff, see?"

Yellowfang gestured to an empty clearing. With a giant POOF!, a Twoleg nest appeared right in the middle of it. It smelled really good. Redtail and Willowpelt walked out of it with large shopping bags and then happily ascended on a flight of golden stairs back to the SC cloud.

"Um, sure, okay...."

Lionblaze turned aorund to leave.

"Wait!"

"What now?"

"Soon would be a very good time to challenge Tornear to a podrace."

Now Lionblaze had no idea what a podrace was, and, if he were actually to do it, how he was going to do it.

"Yeah, sure, whatever. I'll do what you said."

Lionblaze hurried back to camp as quickly as he could before Yellowfang could say anything else weird.

"Berrynose, Yellowfang says that I'm not supposed to be training now, so stop making me train for nothing," Lionblaze instructed. He was very puzzled as to why he actually obeyed Yellowfang's requests.

Berrynose huffed indignantly.

"Fine."

And he stalked away, trying to stick his stumpy tail in the air. Lionblaze turned to Brambleclaw.

"Brambleclaw, you're Mace Windu. Yellowfang's idea."

"Is he important?"

"I guess."

"Awesome!"

ThunderClan had long since accepted the weirdness that was now their lives, especially after Poppyfrost told ThunderClan of the Darth Vader cat. Then Lionblaze turned to Sorreltail.

"Sorreltail, Yellowfang told--"

"Yellowfang talked to you? Lucky! What did she say? What did she say? Seriously, what did she say? Spit it out, cat!"

"Yellowfang told me to tell you that you have unlimited store credit at The StarClan Shop. I have no idea what's in there, but it sounds really cool and smells really good. And something tells me you're the only cat who's going to be able to go in there, let alone buy stuff."

"COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!" Sorreltail screeched as she happily dashed off to find the store.

"Bring us back something!" Cinderheart called after her. The gray she-cat's sisters yowled in agreement. And Sorreltail actually heard them. What a first in Weird Era history!

There it is! I was actually able to crack 2,000 words without having to do lots of flashbacks! I did that extra-special for you since I had to keep you waiting. Sorry! I apologize! What will Sorreltail buy with her store credit? Will Kestreltalon's poultice work? Will Lionblaze actually challenge Tornear to a podrace? What is the Darth Vader cat going to do to ThunderClan? Ah, the questions! Those who can guess what virus the WindClan cats have get extra cookies. And check out my serious Star Wars story, too!