Warnings: Language all over the place. And some comic violence.

Pairings: Established Roxas/Namine, Implied Sora/Kairi, Implied One-Sided (Possibly Non-Consensual) Axel/Saix, innuendo all over the place.

Unravel the Heart

Chapter 2: The Man Named Zero

Nameless ~ Paradox ~ Light

Sora blinked his eyes wearily, staring at an expanse of blackness. He couldn't feel his body; not his arms, his legs, his torso, not even his heart beating. He wasn't even entirely certain where he was supposed to be, what had just happened, or if he was even alive. His thoughts visited that notion with a surprising amount of calm. However, after time that seemed to last an eternity had passed, he could feel his breathing, and his arms twitching with movement. He could feel a coarse, grainy substance that was all too familiar to his island-raised self pressing against the areas of his skin that were exposed. He became conscious of the fact that he was staring up at a large amount of deformed metal, which was canopied over him in a manner that blocked the rays of the sun, but out of the corner of his eye he could see a glimmer beyond the shade.

Slowly, he moved himself into an upright position, checking his body for damage as memories of what had just happened came back to him. To his intense surprise, he found that he was relatively unharmed aside from a few tender bruises across his body – he made quick work of those via a few cure spells.

Getting to his feet, he walked out from beneath the cover of twisted metal and looked around the sunny beach he now found himself on. The sand wasn't white, so he figured it probably wasn't tropical, although it still seemed pretty warm. Well, it was summer anyway, so that makes sense.

He then noticed a flicker of movement nearby, and turned to see Larxene near a campfire, cooking up some CHICKUN. Sora's mouth salivated at the smell that suddenly hit him, and he found himself quickly running over to her. "Larxene! Where did you get that CHICKUN?"

"Back off bitch, this is my CHICKUN." She seemed to become immediately defensive as she readied a few knives with malice.

"Whoa, whoa, relax! I just wanted to know where you got it."

"The forest, dumb fuck. Where else would I find CHICKUN on a deserted island? There isn't a damn KFC around here."

"Quit breaking the fourth wall."

"Oh right. Sorry. There isn't a damn MFC (Moogle-Fried CHICKUN) around here."

"Riiiight. So… we're on a deserted island?"

"Yep. Most of us have already woken up. Kairi moved you below that broken part of the ship over there," the woman gestured at the metal Sora had been asleep under, "so that you wouldn't fry or something. I dunno. Zexion is the only one still passed out."

"Wow… is anyone else injured? Because I was pretty unharmed and all."

"Oh, we all had horrific injuries, you included. But Naminé used her heathen magic from her Tome of Black Magic to heal us for the most part. Although we're lucky she still had her right arm. If she had lost them both, then we woulda been pretty fucked."

Sora tried not to think about Naminé missing an arm, or about whatever horrific injuries he had sustained. "So, where is everyone else?"

"Would you shut the fuck up and let me eat my damn CHICKUN?"

Sora, now enraged, moved to attack Larxene for being a bitch, but she casually warped behind him and jabbed a knife into his ass. He fell to the ground, feeling both pain and violation. "What the heeeelllllll! I thought you couldn't teleport!"

"Dumbass. We can't open Corridors of Darkness for some reason. I can still warp around the area, and stuff."

Sora very delicately removed the knife from his southern orifice, throwing it venomously at the ground as he cured his aching bottom. "Can you please just tell me where everyone went?"

Larxene sighed, in a way that clearly indicated she thought Sora was the biggest waste of time, space, and energy that currently existed on the face of the planet. "You are the biggest waste of time, space, and energy that currently exists on the face of the planet. They all went into the forest to go look for and explore that thing," she explained impatiently, gesturing behind her.

As Sora looked up at the direction she pointed in, he noticed a very large structure off in the distance. It towered above the top of the semi-distant forest, made of what appeared to be stones and bricks. It looked like some sort of temple, like the sort you might see in some Aztec legend or some other clichéd ancient civilization. "They all went?"

"Yes. Didn't I just say that? Zexion's here, but, like I said, he's still out. He's over there." She pointed in a different direction now, and as Sora followed her finger, his gaze landed on a cloak-clad body laying face-down in the dirt, its rear pointing skyward as its head appeared to be buried in the sand.

"You uh… just left him like that?"

"Yeah, thought it'd be funnier."

Sora and Larxene both spared a laugh at Zexion's expense.

"Well, I guess I'll go into the forest and see if I can find everybody."

"Yeah, because that's totally a good idea." Larxene replied, sitting back down to her fire to consume her delicious CHICKUN.

Sora flipped her off as he wandered off toward the forest.

Larxene returned the gesture with vigorous gusto.

Chocolate ~ Chickun ~ Vanilla

Xaldin marched confidently through the thick undergrowth of the great island forest, garbed in a chic, badass Safari Hat, still carrying around his pimp cane, and with several of his dreadlocks wielding machetes to slice through the obstructing foliage of the troublesome jungle. He was the absolute pinnacle of manliness, or so he figured.

Demyx followed behind, complaining about the bugs and the heat, which was being caused due to Axel's natural body heat overflowing from him (due to the excitement of going on a safari, or so he figured). Saïx wandered about near the two of them, looking more depressed than usual as he drew imaginary duckies in the air with a stick he had found.

Behind this group of four, somewhat separated, Lexaeus marched at a stalwart pace, carrying Kairi and Naminé on his back as they giggled and cheered and pretended they were magical princesses with the power to conjure rainbow ponies from Glitter Sparkly Gummy Bear Land, and that Lexaeus was their steed, the Magical Pink and Green Seven-Headed Dragon Demon of Mistress Gumdrop's Hidden Brigade. Lexaeus occasionally played along by making baying noises, which he assured the girls was the sound a seven-headed demon dragon made.

Xigbar brought up the rear of the traveling ensemble, carrying Vexen over his shoulder (as the man had apparently passed out from the heat) while Roxas trotted alongside him, chatting animatedly about some drink or something.

"…But I just prefer, like, Rock Star, or Full Throttle, you know? Red Pull tastes like how I imagine piss must taste like…"

"Yuh-huh, that's nice Rox."

"But Monster is just getting really popular, and it's kinda annoying when all my friends are like 'Hey Roxas, have a Monster!', and I try to tell them I prefer Full Throttle, and they call me a fag and tell me to stop spooshing."

"Uh-huh."

"But you know it's not cool to call people fags; it's a slur, you know? So you should instead call people homosexuals. If I said "Shut up, homosexual", it'd be politically correct, right?"

"Sure."

"And then there's the whole issue of-"

"Okay, Roxas, seriously, shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up or I'm going to fucking shoot you in your face, I am not even kidding you. I will fucking kill you. You got that?"

Roxas went silent, other than a small mumble under his breath about Xigbar being a homosexual before he jogged ahead to catch up with Axel and Saïx, confident that they'd appreciate his company.

"You know, I was wondering when you'd tell that child to cease his yapping." Vexen spoke up.

"And when the hell did you regain consciousness?" Xigbar asked, now irritated at the Academic.

"Oh, about five minutes ago. But I was enjoying the ride, so I figured I'd stay put."

Xigbar threw Vexen unceremoniously onto the ground, muttering obscenities.

"Pox! Pox and malady!" Vexen screeched in indignation, waving his hand at Xigbar in a manner he assumed to be magical.

"Dude, you're not Naminé. You can't use heathen magic."

Up ahead, Naminé piped up, turning to face Vexen. "Yeah, you're not me, Vexen."

"Fucking poser." Kairi added, shaking her head and sharing a knowing look with Naminé before the two resumed their imaginary adventures on Lexaeus's back.

Vexen's lip curled upward in evident fury, but he said no more, standing and dusting himself off before stepping back into pace behind Xigbar. "How much more of this infernal jungle must we endure before we reach our destination?" he bitched, trying to sound fancy to disguise it.

Xaldin shouted back from the head of the line. "You had better not start asking 'Are we there yet?'. If you do, I will end you the same way I ended Lido."

"You mean your mommy?" Demyx asked.

Xaldin turned to face him. "Don't you dare speak of that woman in a manner that links her to me through familial bonds. She is Lido. I will cut you."

Demyx appeared to urinate on himself. "Awww man!"

Amidst Axel and Roxas's snickers, Xaldin turned again to snipe away at more leafy obstructions, when suddenly he reached a clearing. "Aha! We have arrived at the Crazy Temple Place!"

An assortment of cheers erupted from behind him as they stepped out into the clearing and stared up at the rather sizable marvel of ancient stonework. Or at least, it looked pretty ancient.

"Well! Let's get inside! This blasted heat is going to give me a stroke!" Vexen bitched once more, much to the eye-rolling chagrin of Xigbar. Anxious to prevent any further bitching, the group followed the scientist's cue and strode boldly up the line of brickwork stairs, which led toward a dark entryway.

Assassin ~ Vixen ~ Key

Zexion awoke in a rather calm, fully-aware state of mind, understanding immediately that he was neck-deep in sand, which his lungs were filling up with. He proceeded to pluck his head out of the sand, shaking the dirt-like substance from his mop of choppy locks, and then rolled up his sleeve. On his wrist was a rather handy wrist-calendar, which identified the date. It was apparently several days past the date Zexion had remembered it being while he had been on board the ship.

"What the hell? How long was I out?"

Looking around him, the schemer could see his comrades and associates nearby, gathered around a large bonfire. There also appeared to be some spectacle going on in the midst of the crowd. Tentatively, Zexion rose and made his way toward the group.

Upon arrival, he was rather shocked to see his fellows in the Organization, as well as Sora, all gathered around Larxene, Naminé, and Kairi, who were covered in chocolate sauce, vanilla cream, and sprinkles as they wrestled about in a pit of more chocolate sauce. Larxene clearly had the upper hand, but the two girls were fighting her rather scrappily. Also they had bikinis. Yes. Bikinis. Of course, Zexion, being an asexual individual, found no interest in this.

"Uh… what the hell is going on here?" he asked, quite confused by the entire scenario.

Sora turned and grinned, his mouth smeared with chocolate sauce. "Oh, hey guys, Zexion is awake finally! Man, it's been, like, a week!"

"Yeah, that's nice, answer my question."

"Oh," Sora responded. "Well, we all went exploring a while ago, and I had to battle a big Tyrannosaurus Rex! It was pretty extreme, but my Keyblade and the light saw me through. I think I saw his majesty at the end of a tunnel, reminding me that I had to get up and then he cast some light that restored my drive gauge, so I traveled back in time and used my old red jumpsuit to waste that dinosaur! Then we found a temple, but it was being guarded by a ferocious Seven-Headed Dragon Demon, and it hissed, which seemed to piss off Naminé and Kairi a lot, so Naminé used a heathen tome spell and turned it into crack, which we all partook in. Then Demyx had the idea that Larxene was a giant bitch, and Naminé and Kairi had to agree, so Larxene called them on their shit, and they started fighting. Xigbar thought it'd be better with bikinis. And I thought it would be better with condiments. So now we're doing that. They've been fighting every day since!"

"All this fighting is getting me aroused." Saïx stated blandly.

"Well let's go fix that." Axel replied, dragging him off behind a bush.

Roxas stared after them and laughed. "Man, those guys are total homosexuals, am I right Xigbar?"

Xigbar shot Roxas in the face.

Amidst Roxas's screams, Larxene finally noticed Zexion was awake, and wasted no time in easily pinning both Kairi and Naminé so that she could speak. "Hey, idiots! Zexion is awake now! Isn't there something you're supposed to be doing?"

Lexaeus nodded. "That's right, I had forgotten. When we entered the temple, there was a barrier inside that turned the entire structure into a maze of illusions. We needed you to wake up so that we could get you to disarm it with your powers. We still can't open Corridors of Darkness here, and we figure the Temple might be a chance for a clue. Otherwise, we're stranded."

Zexion pulled out his Lexicon and proceeded to conjure up a beach chair made of pages from the large tome, before reclining easily. "I'm far too lazy to go exploring into some island temple. Here." He handed a page to Lexaeus. "That has a standard illusion-dispelling enchantment in it. Just throw it at the barrier."

Lexaeus took the page and nodded, sighing at Zexion's back-handed helpfulness. "Alright. I'm going. Who's coming with?"

Xaldin, Vexen, and Xigbar each announced their intention of accompanying the Silent Hero. The remaining individuals followed Zexion's example in reclining on the beach. However, the three women continued to engage in their wrestling match, finding more interest in that.

Axel emerged from wherever he had taken Saïx, a grin on his face while Saïx sported a disconcerted look. "Ya know," Axel said, taking a seat next to the schemer, "Larxene claims she's raped Roxas. She also says she wants to sex up Naminé and Kairi. But that just seems to make them hate her more. I think she likes it that way."

"And this is relevant information to me, why?"

Axel looked at Zexion as though he were a giant prick. "God, excuse me for trying to make conversation." He then got up and kicked sand at Zexion in a fit of fury before marching off to kick over Demyx's sand castle, much to the musician's indignation.

Just then, in a sudden rupture of smoke, a large door appeared in the sand. All eyes now on the door, it opened a moment later, and out stepped the red-garbed DiZ.

"Greetings and salutations, my hated Nobodies. Oh, and hello Kairi, you're looking radiant today."

"What about me, DiZ?" Sora asked with an excited grin.

DiZ ignored him. "I have arrived here in my inter-dimensional portable laboratory door to speak with Zexion. Would you mind?"

Demyx looked at DiZ with beseeching eyes. "Can you get us off this island? We can't teleport…"

"No." DiZ replied rather staunchly.

Zexion sighed as he eyed DiZ, before getting up in a great show of effort and stepping into the doorway. DiZ then closed it.

Safely tucked away inside the scientist's apparently portable lab, DiZ proceeded to speak. "Ienzo-"

"Don't call me that."

"But for old time's-"

"No."

"Fine. Jerk. In any case, I wanted to inform you that my experiments within the Realm of Darkness are going well. With enough prospected progress, I hypothesize that finding your heart in the darkness shall certainly be within reach very soon. But as you know, this is a mutually beneficial agreement, and if I am to continue providing you with your desired progress, you must continue providing me with the resources I desire and require. Notably, your Dusks take instruction very poorly compared to my drones. I'd have no need of them if my drones could function in the dark realm, but alas, that is not the case. I require a more responsive, suitable servant to help me make my progress. Additionally, I require a host of the light to take my experiments further."

Zexion yawned lazily. "Was the long-winded explanation necessary?"

"It was exposition for the reader's sake."

"Stop breaking the fourth wall."

"Make me."

Reaching into his cloak pocket, Zexion produced a black card which bore the visage of Ansem, Seeker of Darkness. A light squeeze on the card, and the Heartless had appeared himself.

"Here, take this." The bookworm instructed, creating an illusionary double of the black card. "It's a fragment of Ansem's Soul Card. As long as you have it, he'll have to obey your orders."

Ansem was plenty steamed at this. "It's not enough that you rob me of my dignity by making me your personal errand boy, but now you're renting me out!"

"Hey, finders keepers. I can do what I want with you."

"You didn't find me at all! You stole me from the dressy-wearing pansy boy!"

"Eh, same difference."

DiZ chuckled. "An actual intelligent servant, hm? Fine then, "Ansem", you shall be my assistant henceforth. But there is still the matter of a light-host."

Zexion sighed for the umpteenth time that morning. "I'll go get you one."

A moment later, he had stepped back onto the beach through the Magic Door, and plucked up a rock. "Hey Sora."

Sora, hearing his name called, looked up and stared at Zexion. "Yeah?"

"Play with this." The schemer instructed, pelting Sora in the head with the object. Sora hit the ground, unconscious. Larxene pointed and laughed, before proceeding to pile drive Naminé into the chocolate pit.

Zexion then dragged Sora's limp body back through the door, into DiZ's office.

Magic ~ Heathen ~ Game

Deep within the ancient temple, the troop of explorers had made it past the illusory barrier through virtue of Zexion's spell. They walked carefully down a long, straight hallway, carrying torches and wondering when the path would end.

"If Roxas were here," Xigbar spoke up in the silence, "he'd probably make a lame joke about how this long path should be called heterosexual, and not straight."

"Because that would be politically correct." Vexen added, carrying a block of ice which he shined a small flashlight through to create refractions, not wishing to carry a fire-bearing torch. He had bitched about it for a solid hour after entering the temple before he came up with the ice block idea.

Lexaeus grunted, signaling them to become silent as he gestured at a small room which could be seen ahead. The four explorers made their way in, and on the far end of the mostly barren walls was a large alter of sorts, with several odd, rectangular depressions in it, as though to place an object.

"Welcome to the Chamber of Resurrection." A voice echoed through the moderately-sized room, and the four all turned in various directions, until a cloaked figure could be spotted. He wore the same outfits they wore, and yet his voice and height were both unrecognizable factors to the four Organization seniors. His face was obscured by his hood, further casting his identity into doubt. "I'm glad you were all able to find your way here, though I am a bit disappointed by the small number of you. A shame, really."

Xigbar wasted no time in calling his guns to him, taking cautious aim. "Yeah? And who're you, bucko?"

The man considered the Freeshooter for a moment. "That is an interesting question to answer. But I assume you are merely looking for a name. In that case, I do not really have one to give you."

"No name?" Vexen asked, an inquisitive look on his face. "Odd. Most individuals invent a name for themselves. It's a focal part of determining identity. Lack of a name often translates to a lack of motivation. And yet you are here, and clearly with purpose. Have you no motivation? Have you truly no name?"

"If it'll shut up your rambling, I suppose I can give you something. If you must have a name of me, you may call me… Zero. Yes, that will work nicely."

Xaldin smirked, brandishing his pimp cane and transforming it into a lance. "Zero? Are you attempting to precede us by such a choice of moniker?"

"How very astute of you, Three." Zero chuckled, an empty sound. "But now that we've dispensed with the formalities, perhaps I should inform you of the purpose of this chamber?"

The four men did not show any signs of dropping their guards, but seemed to be listening.

"This chamber, as its name might suggest, is where one might come to return an individual to life. You'd be surprised how easy it is to do so – so long as you've managed to procure an item containing that individual's soul, you can place it here on the alter, and just like that, life anew. Of course, it only works once for any person. The fates are rather stingy about giving out return chances for life."

Vexen scoffed. "Please. You expect me to believe such a fabled thing could be true? It is not possible for one to simply return to life through an outlandish alter of hocus pocus properties. Furthermore, a soul cannot be contained in any vessel that is not innately human."

This only caused the man to laugh. "Interesting that you claim such a thing when you study the metaphysical field of hearts, have access to sorcery, and have even witnessed that witch of yours utilize heathen magic. But if you require a demonstration…"

And in the blink of an eye, he was behind Xaldin, and his hand had impaled the Lancer into his back, right out through his chest. Held between his thumb and forefinger was a black card, bearing Xaldin's image upon it. And then, just as quickly, the man was once again out of reach.

Xaldin doubled over, clutching at his chest, avid shock decorating his features. However, after a moment or two had passed, he stood again, feeling more or less unharmed, and with no visible wound on his chest. "What is this madness?"

"This," Zero announced, showing off the black card to the four seniors, "is a Soul Card. It is an object, inhuman in nature, which can house the soul of an individual. In this case, this card is holding the soul of Xaldin within it. As long as the card remains unharmed, however, there is no danger to Xaldin, and it is as though he hasn't lost a thing." He explained, a smile in his voice. "But essentially, my possessing it leaves him at my mercy as a result. One of your rank has already discovered the means of utilizing such a fascinating tool, but has yet to share this knowledge with any of you."

Xaldin appeared to be outraged by the man's claims, and the other three looked upon him with disbelief.

"What's the matter, still don't believe me? Well, then allow me to demonstrate my claims further." The man regarded them coolly, tucking Xaldin's card away and producing a new one. This card was emblazoned with the image of a very familiar mop of pink hair, and a serene expression.

"Marluxia?" Lexaeus asked, confused.

Without bothering to spend any more time on explanations, the cloaked man stepped over to the alter and casually placed the card onto the surface, into one of the rectangular depressions. Immediately the alter lit up in a flare of energy, forcing the present individuals to shield their gazes from the blinding rays.

Moments passed, and when finally the light had subsided, the cloaked man was no more. However, standing before the alter, opening his eyes in a daze, was the Graceful Assassin, Marluxia.

"Marluxia!" Vexen squawked, rather awed. "How is this possible! You should have faded into the shadows!"

Marluxia seemed to be coming to his senses as he stared down at his hands. "I'm alive?" he muttered, mostly to himself. Then a broad grin broke out onto his face, he did a dance, applied some mascara, swung his hips, and brought an index finger to his lips, winking one eye. "Hell yeah, girlfriend, I'm alive!"

However, he then became very serious again, known in this form as Marluxious. His brow furrowed. "I do not know why I have returned to the living, but my soul has been trying to reach you all for some time. I have some rather pressing news about Xemnas." He informed grimly.

Xigbar seemed to be taking this whole revival business in stride, while Vexen was still gawking and Lexaeus was still blinking. Xaldin was more concerned with his apparent lack of a soul. Also, he had lost purchase of his pimp cane, somehow. Most disconcerting…

"What about Xemnas, Mar?" Xigbar asked, always seeming to forget the rest of Marluxia's name, despite knowing him for years.

Marluxious looked around, noting the odd presence he felt in the room. "Perhaps we should discuss this elsewhere."

Mystery ~ Gold ~ Replica

Zero stood in a remote area of the island, staring down at Xaldin's Soul Card, held gently in his hand. Beneath the shade of his hood, he smirked to himself. "That was simply too easy. Even for me." He laughed, flexing his fingers loosely and watching them go alight with a strange, bluish glow. "It won't be so easy the next time, I'm sure. They'll be suspecting it. But the first step has been completed. And now, may the pieces fall where they will."

He then looked up and to his left, at a small, simple door, standing in the sand...