Set the Fire to the Third Bar
AN: This chapter's a bit angsty, but don't worry!
Disclaimer: I don't own "Set the Fire to the Third Bar" by Snow Patrol feat. Martha Wainwright or LtM.
*ALSO: If anyone has any song suggestions, let me know! I'm always happy with new ideas and a fresh look.*
Gillian pulled into Cal's driveway, behind his car. As she got out he walked over and waited for her to pop the trunk so he could help her with her bags.
"I know you're a woman and all, Foster, but the plumber said it would only be about two days. Think you may have over packed a bit?"
Foster just glared at him, so he threw his hands up in surrender and grabbed the heaviest of her luggage.
"I packed essentials, Cal. I know you'd be perfectly happy with just packing a change of underwear but I am not."
He grinned at her and shut the trunk.
"I was only teasing, love. But if you'd packed just underwear, I'd have to send Em around to her mum's for the next few days."
He waggled his eyebrows at her suggestively. Unbidden, images of his hands removing said underwear from her came to her mind. She fought her blush, ducked her head and let out an exasperated sigh. She smirked at him and waited for him to open the front door. After they'd set her bags down they immediately went into the kitchen to look at the takeout menus on the fridge.
"Emily! Come down here and tell me what you want to eat!"
Cal and Gillian were perusing a Chinese menu when Emily came bounding down the stairs.
"Oh, hey, Gillian! I didn't know you were eating with us tonight."
"Actually, darling, Foster's going to be here for a few days. She managed to flood her downstairs and it's not quite livable."
Emily's eyes widened and Foster gave her a sheepish look.
"That sucks!"
"You're telling me. Your dad was kind enough to help me move things all day and offer me the guest room until I can go home without having to wear waders."
"Cool. If you need any more help let me know."
"Thanks, Em."
Cal nudged Foster with his hip and she glanced at him.
"Hurry up and decide. I'm famished!"
Finally deciding on their respective dishes, Cal called the order in. That done he looked at Foster.
"Right. Let's get you moved in."
They had just gotten Gillian's things into the guest room when Cal's phone began to ring.
"Lightman. Hello, there. I'd completely forgotten. Yeah, yeah, I can still make it. Just had a bit of a hectic day helping Foster. No worries, I'll be there soon. Right."
Gillian was looking at him inquisitively. Cal rubbed the back of his neck. Gillian tilted her head to one side.
"You can go, Cal. Emily can show me where the towels and such are."
"You're sure, love? I'm just supposed to be at dinner right now and…"
"Its fine. "
"Alright then. I better get spiffed up. I've kept Wallowski waiting long enough; she'll probably shoot me if I show up in sweat pants."
He turned and left the room before he could see her reaction. Foster felt like the wind had been knocked out of her. He was going to dinner with Wallowski. This was the horrible thing about beginning to come to terms with your feelings for someone. Finding that they had feelings for someone else. Gillian sat heavily on the edge of the bed. Wallowski was a problem. Cal rarely repeated dates, so the fact that he was going out again with her did not make Gillian happy. He knew she disliked her. She was a dirty cop, for Christ's sake! Maybe not heavy into anything, but a liar and a bitch with a chip on her shoulder. Taking a deep breath, Foster closed her eyes and leaned her head back. She heard a tentative knock on the door. Opening her eyes she saw Cal, looking handsome in dark jeans and his requisite button down shirt. He had a look of concern on his face.
"Are you alright, darling?"
She smiled tightly at him.
"I'm fine, it's just a headache."
She stood and began unpacking her toiletries. Cal came up behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders.
"Well, the food's here. You should eat and sleep. Get a good night's rest and you'll feel better."
He let go of her and she turned around, willing herself not to show her sadness and anger.
"I'll do that. You have fun tonight. And be careful. My keys are on the counter, I'm parked behind you so just go ahead and move my car."
He nodded, studying her briefly before turning around and walking down the hall.
"Alright then. Goodnight, Gill."
After she heard the front door slam, she walked down to the kitchen to find Emily poring over a schoolbook. Gillian sat at the counter and grabbed a carton and a pair of chopsticks. Their silence was comfortable, broken only by Gillian's questions about Emily's classes every now and again. When she had finished eating Gillian cleaned up the counter and told Em she was going to bed.
"If you want any help just let me know."
Emily reached over to embrace her.
"OK. Gill?"
"Yeah, sweetie?"
"Dad's an idiot. He'll lose interest in "Shazzer" before too long."
"Well, he might. Either way I'll be here. For both of you, regardless. He can be a bit much when he's seeing someone new."
Gillian smiled softly at Emily. Emily frowned back at her.
"That's true. Why do you put up with it? Frankly, he treats you like crap lately."
"He has his good days. In fact, the past week has been fine."
"I just wish he'd wake up."
Foster looked at her quizzically.
"Never mind. I'll see you tomorrow."
"OK. Goodnight."
Gillian walked down the hallway to her room, her emotions on the verge of bursting from her. She mechanically removed her clothes and put on pajamas, scrubbed her face, brushed her teeth and climbed into bed. She grabbed her iPod and put her headphones in, setting a mellow playlist to shuffle. The first song that came on struck a chord in her heart.
I find the map and draw a straight line
Over rivers, farms, and state lines
The distance from me to where you'd be
It's only finger-lengths that I see
It seemed as if she and Cal were drifting apart even as she thought they were becoming close again.
In a bar across town, Cal sat across from Wallowski. She was saying something and he was miles away. He didn't want to be here. He wanted to be…home. With Emily, yes, but Gillian was there and he felt a pull to go see her. However much she had wanted to hide how she felt about him going out with Wallowski, he'd seen the flash of hurt on her face. The last thing he wanted to do, after bridging the gap that had grown between them, was to hurt her. Wallowski had stopped talking. Cal looked at her blankly.
"Lightman, you don't want to be here."
"No, I don't. I thought I did, but I need to go home."
I touch the place where I'd find your face
My fingers in creases of distant dark places
I hang my coat up in the first bar
There is no peace that I've found so far
The laughter penetrates my silence
As drunken men find flaws in science
Gillian felt the pressure of tears behind her eyelids. She tried willing herself not to cry, but to no avail. Her riotous emotions coupled with the song made it impossible. Her finger hovered over the skip button. She wanted him here so badly but she didn't know how to tell him. How could she risk ruining a business and a friendship? She couldn't help feeling like an idiot as she began to cry.
Cal stood and placed some money on the table. Wallowski watched him with a carefully blank expression.
"Foster."
Cal's head snapped up. A small smile graced her face.
"What about her, Shazzer?
"I should have seen it."
"Foster's my best friend. She's had a tough day, and she's been dealing with a lot at work lately. She needs a friend tonight."
Wallowski shook her head.
"When you two finally wake up, let me know. Anyway, I won't be calling you again. It's pitiful for a woman to go after a man who's so obviously unavailable."
She stood and gathered her coat and purse, leaving with a smile.
Their words mostly noises
Ghosts with just voices
Your words in my memory
Are like music to me
I'm miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
I, I pray that something picks me up
And sets me down in your warm arms
Cal left after paying the bill.
Gillian curled onto her side, silently crying. How had it come to this? She was utterly in love with her best friend, and that's all she was to him; his best friend. That wasn't to be taken lightly, but Gillian knew that even if he felt an attraction to her, it wasn't enough. He was going to slip through her fingers.
After I have traveled so far
We'd set the fire to the third bar
We'd share each other like an island
Until exhausted, close our eyelids
And dreaming, pick up from
The last place we left off
Your soft skin is weeping
A joy you can't keep in
Cal sped home, not sure why he felt the need to get there as quickly as possible.
Gillian's tears were subsiding. She was successfully bottling up the emotions flying through her; or so she thought.
I'm miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
And I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms
I'm miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
and I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms
Cal ran up the steps and inside. The lights were off. Em must be upstairs. Gillian must be in bed. He walked softly down the hall and placed his ear to the guestroom door. He heard nothing and then some slight sniffling, a muffled sob. Without hesitating, he opened the door.
Gillian rolled over when the door opened, letting in ambient light. She saw Cal's silhouette in the doorway and another small sob escaped her. She took out her headphones.
Cal saw her face streaked with tears and he went over and sat gingerly on the bed, finding her hand and holding it.
"I felt like I should come home. I thought everything might be catching up to you. Do you need anything, love?"
Mutely Gillian shook her head and squeezed his hand.
"Shhh, darling, it's alright."
"I'm glad you came back early."
"You could have called me, or told me you wanted me to stay in. I'd have done that for you. What are best friends for?"
Gillian smiled weakly, sadly.
"Well, I just needed someone to be with me for a little bit. I'm sorry I ruined your date."
"Don't be. I'd rather be here, making sure you're alright. That's all I need right now."
Unconsciously echoing Gillian's thought of only needing him, Cal picked up her hand and kissed it. He brushed a lock of hair from her forehead and smiled at her.
It wasn't much longer before Gillian's breathing evened out and she was asleep. Cal just stayed there with her for a little longer, watching her, memorizing her face. Listening to her soft breaths, he felt a burst of such intense love that he nearly gasped with it. He stood to leave.
"Maybe one day, love, I'll be able to let you know. I'll always take care of you, Gill."
He bent and brushed a soft kiss onto her hair and left as she snuggled deeper under the covers as he left quietly.