Well, I was unable to update last weekend due to ski traffic and laziness.

Anyways, here is my latest installment.

For anyone who was on the Lord Of The Rings site a few years back, just after the movies were out and super popular, you might remember this common term. Anytime you heard or read it, it sent chills down your spine. The bad chills. I am talking, of course about… A LEGOMANCE!

*insert scary music*

Caught in a Bad Legomance!

"But Orlando! What about our super oh so amazing wedding? How could you just leave your bride and love of your depressing life and the best thing in Center Earth at the altar? How could you? I thought you were better than this! I really did!" screamed Maryinara Suenessaka as she ran out of the castle

"Okay, first of all, we live in Middle Earth. Second of all, my name is Legolas, not Orlando. I don't even know an Orlando, which brings me to the most important point: I don't even know you. Okay? I do not know you! Why would I marry you if I don't know you?" said Legolas

"Well, fine then! I'll just go split up Aragorn or something!" screamed the Sue

"Die, Sue, die!" came a loud voice from the forest

The Sue vanished in a puff of bubbles.

"Who on earth was that?" yelled Legolas

"Me, I'm Draco." Said Draco as he emerged from the forest

"What on earth did you do that for? Not that I'm complaining, but I'd still like to know." Asked Legolas

"Well, I live in another world, and there we have a huge Mary Sue problem. They're always after Ron, Harry, or I, it seems. But, we've decided to help cleanse the Fan Fiction website of them. What I just used was a spell that… well, we aren't really all that sure what it does, but it gets rid of them." Explained Draco

"That's… um, great, I guess. I'm going to go help Frodo destroy the Ring Of Power, or something no." said Legolas as he ran off.

"I think he just blew me off." Muttered Draco to himself,

"Hey, you just wait until my father hears about this!" he screamed after Legolas

"For the last time, I am supposed to be perfect! I am a F*CKING ANGEL, for God's sake! And my eyes are not the color of cat pee, they are a soft, beautiful, glowing, perfect color of YELLOW! Besides, I'm not even that perfect! I'm getting my period!" yelled none other than Poppy "Ashes", Draco's ex girlfriend

"got oot off mi waey u stpid perp! U stuopod preps shuld go DYE!" yelled Enooby Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way as she pushed through the crowd of students cowering in fear at the sight of not only her, but also Poppy Ashes, from chapters sixteen and seventeen of "Attack of the Mary Sues"

"Students, what is going on? Why aren't you in class already?" came a stern woman's voice from the top of the stairs.

Professor McGonagall walked down the stairs, about to yell at the assembled students, when she heard it.

"U stupod prep! Goffics rool!" screamed the voice

"Oh, no!" whispered Professor McGonagall

"Teechers r sew stopiid! I h8 u allle!" yelled the girl

"Somebody get Professor Dumbledore!" screamed Professor McGonagall

"Wait, so why has Professor Snape been arrested?" Asked Dumbledore, who was in astonishment at what he had just been told by the board of Governors

"Because, Professor Dumbledore, he was caught having a threesome with a couple of students! That's pedophilia and molestation, sir. He cannot work here any longer." Explained one of the members of the board of Governors

Suddenly, the door banged open and none other than Neville Longbottom burst into the room.

"Sir, oh sir, they- they said that she was back! No one knows what to do so they told me to go get you!" panted Neville

"Wait, who's back?" asked Dumbledore

"Her." Said Neville

"You back stabbing no good bastard!" yelled Draco as he caught up to Legolas

"Wait, what are you talking about?" asked a very confused Legolas

"You totally just blew me off back there and you know it!" screamed Draco

"No, I really do have to help destroy the Ring of Power, Draco." Explained Legolas

"Yeah, but wouldn't you rather help us destroy all the Mary Sues?" asked Draco expectantly

"Um, no thank you." Said Legolas

"Oh, you just wait until my father hears about this!" said an extremely offended Draco as he stomped off to go back home

"Jack, something weird is going on. All these girls with perfect hair keep showing up on the island!" gasped Maurice

"No, no, no, that weird goth, or as she preferred to say, 'Goffic', girl finally disappeared!" said Ralph

"Yeah, so did that girl who kept on yelling about how she was a fallen angel or something. I would have pushed her over that cliff, but I couldn't on account of my asthma." Said a short fat, glasses wearing, misfit who either bugged you to death or you liked him

"Sucks to your asthma!" came the familiar chorus

Sorry about the filler chapter, but I'm in a slight creative slump and I have to get ready for Snowball. I decided yesterday during the last ten minutes of sixth period to go, so I have to buy a dress that matches my shoes. Trust me, when you have feet as big as mine, you but a dress that goes with your shoes. You just do.

But, this chapter is where the real plot starts to develop. It had to be done. Sorry. I'll try to update a bit faster.

Anyways, please review. And brownie point to whoever can tell me where the last scene took place.