I saw the image of the shabby wooden pub emerge as we past the last grove of trees.
"ahh The Snuggly quaint place perfect for you." I said slyly.I could tell Rapunzel was contemplating about what to think about the sad excuse of architecture infront of us.
"Well I do like ducklings." Rapunzel said smiling. Yes! she's falling right into my plan!
"Yay!" I exclaimed as I leaned in towards walked up to the door of the pub and I pushed it open.
"Garcon, your finest table please!" The look on Rapunzel's face was priceless I would have laughed if that wouldn't have effected the the pub there was men of every size all with their own individual umm..reason to be scared of them? I could have even sworn I saw one that had a hook but it doesn't do you well to stare in places like that.I looked down to see Rapunzel almost in plan was working perfectly!
You smell that? Take a deep breath through the nose" I said giving an exaggerated inhale,"I don't know what your getting but to me it's part man smell and the other part is really bad man smell I don't know why but overall I think it smells like the colour brown your thoughts?" I finished just in time for Rapunzel to let out a shriek and run.I turned around and saw one of the men was holding her hair.
"That's alot of hair" he said and I seized the opportunity.
"She's growing it out, hey is that blood in your moustache?" I began to go on and on trying to point out things that would make Rapunzel want to get home as fast as possible but just as I was leading her to the door it slammed in front of us.I jumped in front of Rapunzel and she hid behind me (Wait was I protecting her?) anyways one of the bigger thugs at the bar (and trust me that's saying something) pointed to a sign on the door.
"Is this you" He said his finger was covering the middle of the picture but it was easy to tell what it was a wanted poster of me. I reached up to move the man's hand from the picture in the middle only to see a badly drawn nose even worse then the ones on the other posters I had seen.
"Oh now they're just being mean." I regretted it once the words left my I knew it a thug with a hook hand (I guess I was right) ordered a man to go and find some guards.
"That rewards going to buy me a new hook"He said as he snagged by shirt collar with his I was grabbed from behind by another after thug I was pulled by argueing over who got the reward money until they had me in a grip hold and were preparing to punch me out.I tried to move but it was no use.
"Not the nose! Not the nose! Not the nose!" I exclaimed as I closed my eyes for the I heard a WAM as a piece of wood hit the hook hand thug in the head.I looked to see Rapunzel she had used her hair to pull down a wood board from the ceiling to hit him.
"Put him down!" She exclaimed I stared at her in disbelief along with the other thugs.
"Ok look, I don't know where I am and I need him to take me to see the lanterns because I've been dreaming about them my entire life! Find our humanity havn't any of you ever had a dream?"
The hook hand thug turned around,looked at her, and pulled out an axe.I stared as he walked up to her (I cant watch this...)The thug leaned into her and then he said something that completely shocked me.
"I had a dream once" Rapunzel looked up at him as he threw his axe to the if things couldn't get any weirder the thugs burst out into song! Apparently every single person in that pub has a dream the hook hand guy wants to be a pianst,the ugly one wants to find true love,and the biggest guy probably in there named Vladimir (get this) collects ceramic mind was can't be then the pub thugs come up to me and ask me what my dream if i'm going to start singing about my is until they had 20 swords pointed directly at my head.I got up and began to sing and dance like my life depended on it (oh, the irony) I guess they weren't satisfied by my dream of being rich and owning my own island because they grabbed me and began crowd.A voice much higher and sweeter then the rest of the thugs then reached my ears.I turned around to see Rapunzel singing about her dream of seeing the had a beautiful voice it was strong but not in an obnoxious, screaming kind of thugs dropped me and went over to crowd is it one girl just got an entire pub of thugs to sing? And it was about their dreams no less.I turned around to see a goat but before I could even begin to question why on earth there was a goat in a pub someone grabbed my from my placed me on a loose floorboard and at the opposite end of it one of the biggest thugs jumped and sent me propelling through the air.I landed awkwardly doing a handstand on the viking hat of another I knew it they had me on a giant barrell and I was running on it well they through sticks on fire (They are trying to kill me) the song then ended with a loud "Yeah!" and everything went least everything was silent until the palace guards burst through the door.
"Alright where's Rider?Where is he!" the lead guard exclaimed.I quickly grabbed Rapunzel's hand and dragged her under a table with me.
"Find Rider tear this place apart if you have too!" The guard barked at the other guards as he slammed his first on the top of the table Rapunzel and I were ,I felt someone grab my is it...we're dead I thought.I looked up to see the thug with the hookhand. He motioned his eyes towards the back of the bar and began to and I followed thug pushed a lever and a secret passage opened.I looked at my ticket to freedom in disbelief.
"Go,live your dream" the thug said.
"I will" I replied.
"Your dream stinks.I was talking to her" the thug motioned to ,once again they have to hate me and my dream but love Rapunzel.I scowled and began crawling down the Rapunzel and I were about halfway down the dark tunnel (I had found a lantern to use as a light source) I began to speak.
"So umm well that was pretty impressive"
"I know!" Rapunzel exclaimed but quickly changed back to a less enthusiastic tone,"I know."I smilled at her excitment the first real smile I've had in a long time (not counting my grins and such)
So..uh.. ya' from?" Rapunzel asked questionally as she came up beside me. Backstory? She wanted me to give her a backstory? Absolutely not.
"Woah Woah Woah! Sorry Blondie I don't do backstories however I am becoming very interested in yours..." The girl has 70ft of hair and has been locked in a tower her whole life of course I'm interested.I continued speaking,"Now I know I'm not supposed to mention the hair..."
"Nope"
"Or the mother"
"Nope"
"Quite frankly I'm to scared to ask about the frog"
"Chameleon..." I really did have only one question to ask since all those other topics were "frowned upon" I wanted to know why she never left the tower in the first place if she wanted to see these lanterns so face frowned as soon as I asked her the question (why was she so upset by this?) Just as she was about to answer a tiny pebble fell and hit her in the ground began to shake and soon the palace guards were visible sprinting down the passage.
"RIDER!" one of the guards screamed.I started to panic they can't catch me now! I don't even have their crown anymore thanks to Blondie.I yelled to Rapunzel to run and we began sprinting to the dim light at the end of the passage.
We ran out into the light only to make a sudden stop at the edge of a only hope of escape appeared to be a rickety ladder descending from the cliff but that idea was quickly shot down as two figures burst out of a boarded up tunnel.I squinted my eyes to get a better look at the my luck it's the Stabbington Brothers and I'm guessing they arn't happy with me (seeing as how I ditched them and ran off with the crown) and I have a feeling they might want revenge.
"Who's that?" Rapunzel asked looking down at the two brothers.
"They don't like me." I said thinking of the best summary of my relationship with the two thugs.I went to turn around to find another escape route when the palace guards burst out of the same tunnel Rapunzel and I had come through.
Who's that?" Rapunzel asked.
They don't like me either.." I said as they began to pull out their then the palace horse I had barely managed to escape before comes bounding this day get any worse!
"Who's that?" Rapunzel asked a little more concerned this time.I had better put an end to this or we'll be here all day I grabbed Rapunzel's shoulders and said,
"Let's just assume for the moment everyone in here doesn't like me."
Rapunzel shoved the frying pan at me and used her hair to swing to the other side of the left me! I can't believe she just left me! The main guard pulled out his sword and began to approach me using the frying pan I defended myself and suprisingly took out every guard! "Oh mama! I have got to get me one of these!" I exclaimed looking at my then I found myself duelling with the palace horse with a sword in his mouth! As if this day wasn't wierd enough singing thugs,70ft. hair,lethal frying 's even worse is the horse got the upper hand and actually got me to drop the frying pan over the cliff.
I watched the pan fall until it hit the bottom of the canyon with a loud clank.I then turned around staring directly into the horse's eyes at sword point.
"How bout' two outta three?" I said sheepishly.
Suddenly I felt something wrap around my arm. I looked over to see Rapunzel's hair as it pulled me over the cliff.I thought the worst was over...I couldn't have been more wrong.
"