Three months after Dean had arrived at the motel, and he had told Sam that they were perhaps better together than apart, and Loki still hadn't returned. And Sam really didn't want to look into why he was feeling so anxious and agitated about that.
Still, three months was a long time, and well… he was getting jumpy. Plus, Sam felt he was mentally scarred from having to see people act as himself and Dean (he really didn't need to know how dependent they were on each other, really) in a convention, and did he know he wouldn't be smote for it, he'd shoot Chuck for writing the damned books in the first place.
As if that wasn't bad enough, having learnt from Becky that Crowley had the colt, not (as they'd previously thought) Lilith, Dean was all gung ho for getting the gun and shooting Lucifer. Sam had no idea how to deter him from that idea.
It wasn't like he could tell him how Sam knew for a damn fact that the gun wouldn't kill Lucifer. And given Dean wasn't exactly trusting Sam at all, he wouldn't just accept that Sam knew the gun wouldn't work because Sam was awesome like that and just knew random shit. No. Not even Sam believed that.
So Sam was in a bit of a pickle, and was trying to stall Dean from going and gate-crashing wherever the hell the demon was hiding out. He was really hoping for Loki to appear soon and give him an out. Or, you know, appear and prove that Sam hadn't actually just imagined the god showing up.
Plus, Dean was beginning to look at him strangely for using the Reese's Pieces packet as a bookmark, though, in honesty, Sam had been using it since he'd found it in his pocket before his second meeting with Loki. Again, Sam wasn't going to look into reasons behind that either.
Currently, Sam was sitting in the motel room, staring blankly at his computer screen, whilst Dean and Castiel were out playing Super Secret Special Angel Force… or something. Sam was sure Dean had come up with some random name for it. Probably less cynical and bitter than the one Sam had given.
If they'd – okay fine, no, Sam wouldn't have told them that hunting down Crowley to get the gun, but if they had let him speak, he'd worked up an awesome reason for them not to leave just yet. Pie always worked on Dean. It was just how he was. Then at least Sam would have had time to either think of a plan to make Dean and Castiel realise that the colt idea sucked, or Loki would show up.
However, given he was on his own, in a motel room, staring at a blank computer screen, then it was clear he sucked at getting Dean to do anything other than stare at him suspiciously and scoff whenever Sam even thought about stating his opinion. Which was actually kind of annoying now that Sam thought about it.
Maybe if he ate as much sugar as Loki, then he'd go into a diabetic coma and not wake up until all this crap was over. Or at least, it'd make him happy. Or ill. He wasn't actually too sure, actually. It'd give him something to do though.
Sam sighed loudly, then pressed some random keys on his keyboard, before groaning loudly and slamming his head down into the keyboard.
"That not hurt." Sam just groaned even louder, though the sound was muffled slightly from the fact he hadn't lifted his head from his keyboard. He ignored the fact that he could hear Loki moving closer to him, before sitting on the chair opposite. "S'up, Sammy-boy?"
"Oh, the usual. Dean and Castiel are picking out matching robes, Crowley is a demon with a demon-killing gun that Dean wants to try and kill Lucifer with, I'm contemplating death by sugar overdose, no one actually listens to what I have to say but if I say that outloud even I feel disgusted at my levels of angst emo shit, we're all going to Hell, Lucifer wants to do unnatural things in my body, which sounds wrong however you see it and to top it all off, there is fuck all to hunt. So yeah, I'm good. How are you?" Sam mumbled, turning his head to look at Loki next to him.
"Huh, compared to you, my life seems highly boring." Loki admitted, smirking when Sam finally lifted his head from his laptop to look at the god.
"Why'd you leave?" Sam asked, which made him cringe at the pathetic quality his life was now taking. He really hadn't meant to ask that. Or at least, not so whiny. Actually, no, he just didn't intend to say it at all.
"I had to do some stuff. Talk to some people. Call in a couple of favours." Loki admitted with a shrug, and Sam narrowed his eyes at the god.
"What does that mean?"
"It means, Sammy, that I'm going to help you in this. I refuse to let Lucifer ride your body… if anyone's going to riding you, it'll be me." Loki added with a lascivious wink that made Sam blush, much to Sam's own horror.
"I… have no words to that."
"That is a resoundingly positive reply in my eyes, Sammy, You certainly didn't say no to bumping uglies with me. That is so very awesome." Loki said with a leer, and Sam raised his eyes upwards and silently asked for patience.
"So… you're going to help us out in this? You're willingly going to join this suicide mission? What favours could you possibly have called in to make you choose that decision? Who did you speak to?" Sam asked, staring at Loki as though he was insane, which Sam was fairly positive was a fair description actually.
"Well…" Loki trailed off and then shifted uncomfortably. "Where's Dean again?"
"Who knows? I still think he's picking out some sort of matching outfit for him and Castiel. Or possibly the Karma Sutra of eyefucking. Try out some new positions whilst keeping eye contact and rising the unbearably stifling sexual tension in any room. Christ, I swear the last ghost we went after actually burnt their own remains just to escape it all." Sam muttered, and Loki chuckled and shook his head.
"That bad, huh?"
"You have no idea. It's cringe-worthy. I want to just scream at them to fuck already."
"Why don't you?"
"Dean might actually shoot me. He twitched towards his gun last month when I threw a tube of KY at his head just to interrupt his and Castiel's distressingly exhibitionistic show." Sam explained, lips twitching slightly when he remembered the look on Dean's face. And the resulting confused questions from Castiel. Sam would have felt being shot by his brother as worth it.
"Any idea of when they'll be back?" Loki asked, standing up from his seat to walk over to the door, which Sam just watched then shrugged. He really wasn't too concerned about Loki anymore. And he actually really liked the guy. Not that he'd ever say it out loud.
"Not a clue. Not anytime soon though. I think they're going to try and stalk demon-killing gun holder Crowley." Sam admitted with a careless shrug. He wasn't included in the secret club. He was almost sure it was a point system and Sam was fairly positive he was in negative points by now. So, joining a club headed by an amoral pagan god actually sounded fun. "So? Now that you know the killjoy Christians won't be here, wanna share with the fun side of the Apocalypse, which admittedly, is me and you right now."
"The fun side? Really?" Loki asked, looking over his shoulder at Sam with an amused look on his face. Sam smirked back and watched as Loki silently conjured a piece of, well Sam wasn't sure, it was either quartz or crystal, then he used it and started to carve symbols and runes on the bottom on the window he was looking out of.
"Sure, why not? You're a Trickster. I'm fairly certain you guys invented the phrase 'sense of humour'. And well… I'm not allowed in the 'thou shalt' club. Demon blood, ya know." Sam said with a false sigh of self-hate. He really hoped Loki stuck around, it made Sam seem less self pitying.
"I can accept that. Welcome to the club then, Kid." Loki said, finishing whatever he was doing, before walking back to Sam and sitting on the chair opposite him once more, wide smile on his face. "Knew you were my favourite for a reason."
"I refuse to wear matching t-shirts." Sam stated, somehow knowing that at some point Loki was going to snap them into one. "So anyone else in our little club?"
"I'll answer that by telling you what I've been up to since I left you three months ago, shall I?" Loki said, shifting on his chair and sitting back, placing his feet on the one free chair left.
"Sounds good to me." Sam agreed, closing his laptop and moving to rest his chin on his arms, looking at Loki.
"Okay then, first, how much do you know about me? My mythos? I know you're smart, Kid, so tell me what you know." Loki asked, staring at Sam and making Sam shift awkwardly.
"Not much, I know you've apparently had mistresses/affairs and a wife, and that, if that's true, then you've got six kids. Which… how do you give birth to an eight-legged horse?" Sam asked, and Loki just stared at him, before he coughed and looked away.
"Magic and alcohol. Lot's of alcohol." Loki muttered, before he then chuckled and shook his head.
"What?"
"Nothing." Loki told him with a small smile, before he sat up straight and looked at Sam once more. "Right, well seems like you know the basics at least. I went to my children. They… well, let's just say they know me."
"Huh?"
"Nevermind. To cut a long and boring story short, they are also members of the fun team." Loki said with a shrug, not meeting Sam's incredulous stare, which made Sam wonder why. It actually seemed like Loki was embarrassed about something.
"They just agreed to help?" Sam asked, and he couldn't hide the shock in his voice at that.
"They're my children. Of course they agreed to help me. So, after that, I went to search out some other Trickster's that I thought may or would help. Including a couple of other gods that owed me a favour."
"And you called in that favour by asking them to join a war against Lucifer and Heaven? What the hell did you do for them to get that kind of favour?" Sam asked incredulously, and Loki just smirked at him before he shook his head.
"No, that wasn't the favour I asked for. First, the Trickster's. Anansi, Puck and Raven were the ones that agreed to help however they could. Though both Anansi and Raven asked that they be used for something other than fighting. Puck, unsurprisingly, was all up for the fighting." Loki told Sam, and Sam smiled and couldn't help but feel a little confused about why these beings were willing to help them.
"What… I mean…" Sam huffed in frustration as he couldn't think of how to put what he wanted to ask into words. Finally he just shrugged and looked at Loki with a confused head tilt. "Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why are you helping out? Why would they? Why not just wait it out?" Sam asked, he just didn't understand why they'd sign up for this.
"We like humans, Sam. If we sit back and let this whole war go ahead without lifting a finger to help the only people that seem to want to stop it, then we'd lose everything." Loki finally admitted after having looked at Sam in silence for a few minutes.
"Huh. Okay…" Sam said, not too sure what else he actually could say to that. "So… what favours?"
"Ah. Here." Loki said and handed Sam a small gold medallion hanging from a length of leather cord. Sam looked at it in confusion, then looked up at Loki.
"Um… what is it?" Sam asked, absently rubbing his finger over the odd lettering around the edge.
"Protection for you. The favours I called in. Some of them at least." Loki said, motioning to the medallion. "It's been blessed by a couple of gods and goddesses."
"Which ones?" Sam asked curiously, looking back down at the gold coin, that was warm to the touch and actually made Sam feel safe, now that he thought about it.
"Freyr for success, Nike for victory, Morrigan for War, and Isis and Bastet for protection. It won't guarantee us a win, but it'll help us a little." Loki admitted, shifting in his seat, whilst Sam just stared at the coin in awe.
"Really?"
"Yeah…"
"What other favours? Or… you don't have to tell me. I'm just curious." Sam said, realising just how much Loki had actually done for him, and thus not actually wanting to ask too much (or anything else, actually) of the god.
"No, I don't mind. You should know. After all, we're a team." Loki said, smirking at Sam, who chuckled and smiled back. "I had a couple of ward stones made up, which I used earlier. No one will be able to find this place should they not know it's already here. Including dream walking ex=angels."
"That's… incredible! Really? Can anyone learn the runes and such that you used?" Sam asked excitedly, eagerly leaning forward over the table.
"You can learn them, but having the right material to carve them would make them actually work better." Loki told him with a grin, and Sam deflated a little and pouted. "I'll get you a stone."
"You're awesome. Knew I liked you for a reason." Sam told him with a wide smile and Loki smiled back at him just as widely. "So anything else, or is that it? Because let me tell you, what you've done already is pretty damn incredible."
"Aw, Sammy, you'll make me blush." Loki cooed and Sam mock glared at him, before grinning sheepishly. "And there wasn't really anything else."
"So… Can I ask you something?"
"Sure thing, Sammy." Loki said, and Sam shifted in his seat uncomfortably, nibbling on his lip as he tried to think how to word his query.
"How do you keep finding me?" Sam finally asked, which wasn't actually what he wanted to ask, but it made him come across as less insane than the original thought he had.
"Huh." Loki fidgeted and then stood up and moved over to the window that he'd carved. "I told you, you're my favourite, Sam."
"Uh huh. And claiming me as your favourite human means you can find me wherever I happen to be?" Sam asked, not actually believing Loki entirely, though there was some truth in his answer.
"Technically… yes." Loki said, throwing a grin at Sam, who just raised an unimpressed eyebrow.
"And what's the full reason?"
"It was an accident, if that helps at all." Loki said and Sam began to feel an uncomfortable twisting feeling in his stomach as he tried to think what Loki was going to admit. "You know when we first met?"
"Kinda hard to forget." Sam told him dryly, ignoring the wide grin Loki sent him and the wink that went with it.
"Yeah, well… apparently I should have um… Huh. This is actually quite hard to admit." Loki said, sounding genuinely shocked. Sam watched him warily, slowly standing up from his chair and moving around the table to walk over to Loki.
"What do you have to admit?" Sam asked him quietly, moving to stand next to Loki, but with just enough distance that they weren't actually touching. Loki glanced at him before he turned back to looking out the window, like Sam.
"It really was an accident." Loki admitted, letting his head drop forward to bang on the windowpane.
"Okay, how about if I promise not to kick your ass, you tell me what happened? I'm assuming it was when we er… yeah." Sam said, blushing as he tried to think of how to put it.
"You'd be right in that assumption." Loki mumbled and Sam actually felt a little worried about what he was going to learn, given Loki actually missed or ignored an opportunity to mock Sam.
"Right, so… Loki, you do know you have to tell me right? It's not actually fair on either of us to not tell me." Sam pointed out, and felt bad for the small twinge of satisfaction at seeing Loki cringe in guilt.
"You have a point. Fine, I don't really know how, so truly it was an accident, but um…" Sam looked over at Loki in confusion when he mumbled something under his breath.
"I didn't get that."
"We bonded. As in… somehow, and really, this actually hasn't ever happened and I think I may have accidentally pissed off some god of love or magic or something, but er… somehow, you're my mate. Or wife." Loki added with a chuckle, whilst Sam just gaped at him in shock, stumbling backwards and dropping heavily to sit on Dean's bed.
"Okay, first, making a joke about me being the wife isn't the way to make me take the news that we're freaking married and second, what?" Sam shrieked, and Loki had the grace to look apologetic and sheepish.
"Sorry. And we're not really married in the sense you use the term." Loki admitted, coughing uncomfortably and moving back to face Sam whilst leaning against the window. "Sam… I um… I don't actually know is we can break the bond. Clearly, as proven by the fact that we haven't exactly been faithful or living together for a fair few years now, we don't have to do anything about it. I think it may just be half formed."
"So… you don't actually know much about this?" Sam asked, finally remembering how to talk and no longer at risk of either a heart attack or a stroke.
"It's not exactly a common thing, Sammy." Loki grumbled, muttering about something under his breath. "Look, you wanted to know how I could find you, and well, that's the reason."
"But we don't have to do anything about it? We can… ignore it?" Sam asked, not actually sure what he felt about the whole mess.
"Seems like it." Loki admitted, and Sam felt at a loss for what else he could say.
"Is that why you're helping?"
"Partially, but not completely. I told you, I like you, I like humans. I don't want to see that be destroyed." Loki told him, nibbling on his bottom lip and looking away from Sam to look out the window. "Sam…"
"What now?" Sam groaned, rubbing his hand over his face. He really didn't want to know what else Loki had to tell him when it was said in that tone.
"There's probably something I should tell you.." Loki admitted and Sam groaned, then slowly looked up at Loki, inwardly dreading what was going to be said.
"Go on." Sam said, waving his hand in encouragement. Weak encouragement, but he felt that at least he'd made an effort.
"Well… I'm not just—" Loki stopped and then looked out the window, before looking back at Sam and wincing. "Looks like Dean's back. We'll continue this another time, Sammy."
Sam gaped at Loki when the damned god clicked his fingers and disappeared from the room. Sam then fell backwards on the bed with a groan and pulled the pillow over to smush over his face. "My life sucks."
"Er… Sam?" Sam just groaned quietly into the pillow when he heard Dean's tentative enquiry and hoped that he could just lie there and pretend he wasn't actually there and seemingly freaking married to a Pagan god. How one got married by accident, Sam didn't actually know. If he did, he'd have probably tried to avoid it. "Sam?"
"What?" Sam asked through the pillow still on his face, he didn't actually want to remove and look at anyone. The pillow gave him comfort.
"What are you doing?"
"Smothering myself."
"Huh. What's with the necklace thing? Is that gold" Dean asked, and Sam jumped when Dean prodded the charm Sam was wearing, not realising just how close Dean had gotten.
"Possibly."
"What is it? Where'd you get it?" Dean asked, and Sam brutally strangled the urge to giggle.
"My husband." Sam said dryly, then pressed the pillow harder onto his face. "Hold the pillow down, would you, Dean? Don't let go until I stop struggling?"
"Dude! I'm not killing you, and what husband? Stop messing about Sammy, where'd you get the necklace?" Dean asked, ripping the pillow off of Sam's face, which Sam felt was just cruel.
"Dean…" Sam turned to look at Castiel, who was staring at the charm around Sam's neck nervously.
"Cas? What's up? Sam, why does Cas look like that coin is gonna rip his throat out? What is it?" Dean asked, looking and sounding a touch more frantic now, and Sam wanted to find a way to summon Loki back here and kick his ass.
"Spousal abuse isn't frowned upon by the Vikings, is it?" Sam asked, and both Dean and Castiel looked at him strangely, making Sam realise he'd asked that out loud. "Whatever. Look, the coin is for protection. It's not going to harm anyone. I don't think. You may not wanna try and kill me… but should you do so, we'd find out for sure. And, you know, if I ask you to, then surely it'd know that and let you put that pillow back over my face and just… keep it there for a little bit."
"Sam… you're kinda freaking me out a little here, man. What's going on?" Dean asked, moving to sit on the bed next to Sam tentively, whilst Castiel quickly walked over to the window and inspected the markings on it, inhaling in shock.
"Samuel, who was here with you?" Castiel asked, and Sam groaned when Dean practically broke his neck when he spun to look at Sam. Pushing himself up to sit on the bed, feeling a little height would give him a tiny bit of an advantage, Sam winced and looked at Dean.
"Sam?"
"You know when erm… you know when we decided to split up a few months ago?" Sam asked, biting his lip hard enough to draw blood, then wincing and rubbing his tongue over it to sooth it.
"Yeah…" Dean said slowly, glancing over at Castiel, who had moved nearer to the bed and was looking at Sam intently.
"Right, well… I bumped into an old… acquaintance." Sam admitted, and silently groaned at how this was going to go down. It was going to be a long night.