Ghost in the Night
A Hey Arnold FanFic
Disclaimer: I do not own Hey Arnold and make no attempt to profit from it. All characters belong to Craig Bartlett, who is a genius!
Special thanks to Pyrex Shards, Anonymous Latina and loonytunecrazy for their reviews. I feel honoured that you would say that Pyrex Shards and I thank you for that; I hope this lives up to your expectations. Enjoy.
Chapter Ten: The End?
Perhaps in hindsight standing at the top of this mountain wouldn't have been such a big deal if he had managed to avoid the howling gale that blew around him. Or if even perhaps months ago everything had worked out the way he thought it might. But then again life had never gone the way he had thought it would. The winding trail had ended and now he stood at the top, his gaze giving way to the magnificence and coldness of the Mountain View, his mind rendered empty as he looked around trying to take in each and every detail in minute and exacting detail.
Things had changed dramatically for Arnold since that eventful weekend; now standing at the top of the mountain with a camera, Arnold began to click away happily, his new found love and joy of painting having changed his world for the better. Still part owner with Gerald, Arnold had resided to the management side and had given Gerald greater choice of the running of the bar. Another snap shot of the mountain side sealed itself away in the mind of the camera, the coldness starting to send shivers down his spine. No matter how much he had moved on though, Helga was never far from his thoughts, her spirit following him endlessly. He wanted to go back to her, but even now…a ringing in his pocket grew louder, Arnold only able to feel the vibration to alert him to the fact that he was needed.
Receiving it, Arnold could hear the laughter grow louder on the other end. "Gerald, what's up?"
"Arnold you there man? It's hard to hear you over that wind – Phoebe settle down please?" Gerald pleaded away from the microphone, Arnold laughing to himself as Phoebe managed to tear herself away from Gerald.
"Anyway, we were both wondering when you'd be back for the dinner; you do remember we were treating you tonight right?"
Arnold smiled and nodded although his best friend could not see it. "I haven't forgotten; I just want a few more shots of this range and I'll be down."
Gerald muttered an ok before he hung up, leaving Arnold alone to his thoughts once more. Time began to slip away from him again as he continued to capture photos for his works. Having since arrived in New Zealand, Arnold had felt a revelation inside of him; he couldn't quite describe it yet to anyone, not even Gerald, but he felt like he was reborn; there was something about the tranquil and gentle nature of the country that seemed to bring out the best in him.
Another click and he turned off the camera; Queenstown was amazingly silent as he began his trek back down the mountain. The late afternoon air was nippy and bit through his clothing but it wasn't long until he found the car and headed back into town. All the while he drove; Arnold couldn't help but feel that something was still missing. He sighed and knew it in his heart. Helga was still out there somewhere and here he was wishing that above all the fun and enjoyment he could have the one thing that he had managed to let go of…again.
Four months earlier…
His fists clenched themselves tightly, pounding the mattress repeatedly without relief. How could he have done this? Thumping it with everything he had, his body kept up his efforts, his mind still numb and aching from the conversation. Another searing burn moved through his arms but he kept going; he needed this. She had been in his arms only hours ago; how had he managed to stuff everything up once again? Punching it in the hope the answer would reveal itself, Arnold hadn't noticed the aching his arms were beginning to feel, until they gave way and his body collapsed onto the bed.
"Damn it Arnold," he cried into the sheets. "Why did you have to do this now? After everything she was going to give you, after everything you wanted to give her…you idiot!" he shouted furiously, thumping the bed with his body.
Helga had left the instant he had uttered those words; he could have chased after her, but he didn't. Was he a coward? He felt like it right now. Lower than dirt? He had to be. Nothing was ever going to work out in the end for him. Lifting his head with great effort, he caught sight of the black book on his bedside table. Hatred and anger burned through him; it had come to represent everything that had been wrong in his life for so long. His hands were already moving of their own accord, his limbs clambering over one another in a bid to grasp the book.
This would have been funny to anyone watching as he heaved himself to the book; like a limp fish he knocked it onto the ground. Angry at the lack of effort he had with his body, Arnold was about to round on the book and damage it when he saw something written in the pages. It was neater than most of his writing in the book, but that wasn't what caught his attention; it had been addressed to him by himself. Titled at the top 'For when you feel down', Arnold paused to read it and gasped; everything came flooding back to him; the rope, the chair, the black room and the darkness that crept inside every part of his body. He had felt it fall from beneath him, the chair no longer supporting him as he awaited deaths embrace.
Gerald walked in amidst the clutter and chaos his room had become and sat down next to him, resting his hand on Arnold's back as Arnold cried onto the floor. "She meant the world to you didn't she?" Gerald mumbled softly, Arnold's jerking nods the only way he could communicate.
"It is for the best," Arnold managed to mutter after a while, his voice managing to find itself once again.
"Are you sure my man? It's not too late to make one last ditch attempt you know? We could jump in the car, race to the airport and catch her before she leaves; I'm sure we could get Phoebe to stall her for a few moments if need be?" Gerald explained, earning a smile from Arnold.
"No thanks Gerald."
Gerald looked at him curiously. "Why the sudden change Arnold?"
"I finally remembered that night; I know now why I couldn't let her go. Whether I knew it or not, I needed that closure from her; I needed to hear her say that she hadn't cheated on me, and I needed to say sorry for everything I did. It may never heal the wounds we both have; but I can move on from her. I know I hurt her, but she will know in time."
"Man you are weirder than I thought," Gerald stated before looking away.
"She isn't coming back Gerald."
"I know."
"She isn't going to be walking in that door right now."
"I know."
"So why do I want her to come in again?" Arnold asked.
"This is something that is even beyond me Arnold; we're one, but we're not the same. I think you need time; you need the chance to find you again. Who knows maybe you two are destined to be together, I can't really say."
Arnold felt his body relax; reaching out he closed the book and placed it back onto the stand, sitting up properly and returning his attention to Gerald. "You know I care for you Arnold; we both know Phoebe does too. Maybe for now though you need to let her go; you both have your own life to lead and maybe it's for the best that this weekend passes into our memories only."
"It can't be just a coincidence Gerald-"
"For now it might just be Arnold; leave it be my man. I don't want you to go beating yourself up over her again. One time was bad enough," Gerald said loudly, far more loudly than he had intended to speak.
Arnold looked at him shocked. "I didn't mean to-"
"I know Arnold; it's just you need to put it behind you. You confronted it so please leave it in the past where it belongs."
Present day…
Shaking his head, Arnold cringed momentarily from the light of the hotel room, the stiffness in his neck the only real cause of discomfort as he changed his clothing. A soft knock on the door hurried along his efforts, Gerald joining him without a word, straightening his tie and fixing his vest before looking over Arnold with a smile.
"We shouldn't keep Phoebe waiting for too much longer my man; you know how she is when things aren't running on time, especially something this important."
Arnold laughed before straightening his hair. "So when are you going to pop the question to her Gerald? It couldn't be much longer now surely."
Gerald didn't say a word as Arnold moved into the bathroom to check over his appearance. For someone who didn't usually have trouble with saying something, Gerald was being unusually silent as they walked to the car, Phoebe already waiting patiently, if not a little irritated at the time the two boys had taken to prepare themselves. A short drive later and the three of them were at a small local pub, itching to get into the warmth and comfort of the place. None of them really spoke until they were seated, Gerald and Phoebe together with Arnold opposite them.
Not wishing to be the third wheel, Arnold regretted his failure to remember to find someone to come along with him tonight. But he could hardly be expected to do this when his entire day had been spent observing the landscape and appreciating the scenic views of Queenstown. So it was with a momentary bitter feeling in his mouth that he took a sip of the red wine before him and began to talk with Gerald and Phoebe about their day.
Having enjoyed the sights around the town, Gerald was beginning to wonder if they should stay longer, with the original return from Christchurch looming before them. Phoebe seemed anxious to wait around a little longer in Queenstown before their departure home, which was very quickly supported by Gerald. Arnold took no notice of this and shrugged; he honestly didn't mind spending a few extra nights here providing he got the opportunity to experience more of the town. A blonde haired waitress with braided hair greeted them and took their orders, smiling at Arnold who blushed lightly as she walked away. Returning with drinks, Gerald winked at his friend who simply shrugged at the retreating waitress. A toast to the agreed upon decision was quickly followed by dinner, hastily consumed by all three adults.
"What is the agenda on the menu for tomorrow Phoebe?" Arnold asked, leaning back into the chair after the meal. Despite the continuous flow of food being served to the customers, there were few people now in the pub as they began to talk, a fact Arnold was grateful for.
"I'm thinking of checking out the shops around here once more; I think I saw this wonderfully crafted necklace so I shall endeavour to find it once more," Phoebe smiled.
"The ski fields are looking particularly good, so Arnold and I shall be spending the day experiencing the wonder of snowboarding and skiing," Gerald grinned beside her, earning a playful punch from Phoebe.
"It sounds ok then. Should probably get to bed early tonight; those last few late nights are really starting to kill me," Arnold smiled, watching the two of them lean and kiss.
"Besides," Gerald said, "There is something I need to tell the two of you."
Standing up, Gerald got down unto one knee, Phoebe already far ahead or Arnold realisation of what was happening and was watching Gerald intently with a beaming smile on her face. "Phoebe my darling, ever since I've met you I have never been able to take my eyes off of you. You have been the greatest thing to happen in my life and I can only ever hope to make you happy after all you have given me. And now there is something I must ask you."
Removing a small box from his pocket, Gerald steadied his breathing before looking Phoebe in the eye; Arnold could swear he saw a tear in Phoebe's eye but he dismissed it. "Phoebe, I want to spend my life with the girl I love and cherish above everything else and I want that girl to be you. With all my heart I ask you this; Phoebe, will you do me the honour and privilege of becoming my wife?"
For a moment Arnold wondered whether or not it was normal for someone being proposed to, to suddenly jump and begin crying all over them. He had to suppress the urge to laugh at the sight of Gerald's confusion. But a quick shout of yes dispelled any fears of a rejection, the people still in the pub cheering loudly as the blonde waitress came back over. Arnold couldn't help but smile and noticed something slightly different about the waiter; maybe it was her hair? Dismissing it, Arnold ordered the celebratory drinks for everyone.
"Sure thing football head."
For the first time in months Arnold froze; he hadn't been called that for a long time now. The last person who had…looking up at the waiter Arnold felt his heart begin to beat harder, his eyes darting all over her features and kicking himself mentally for the stupidity of not noticing it sooner. She wasn't the same waiter from before and now he understood why Phoebe had been keen to come here tonight. Brushing aside her fringe, Arnold tried to feel happy but it was proving to be harder than he thought.
"Hello Helga," he said coldly.
"Hardly the greeting I was expecting; congratulations Phoebe," she beamed as Phoebe had detached herself from Gerald and jumped into Helga's waiting arms. A sheepish Gerald had his smile wiped away upon seeing the expression on Arnold's face turn from smiling to furious. Jumping up from the table, Arnold stormed out of the pub, not bothering to look back at the shocked looks on Phoebe and Helga's faces.
How could he have been so stupid? Of course she was up to something; she was always up to something. And Gerald? He had to have been in on it from the start. It was time for him to go; he had had enough of this life. There was nothing left for him here but heartache and more pain. Where to do it? The mountains had been wonderful to see…running steps behind him stopped him in his tracks, waiting for Gerald to catch up to him. He would probably try to talk him out of it but that wouldn't stop him this time; a final goodbye. A single tear slid down his cheek; he didn't want it to end like this.
But Gerald never came; coming to a panting halt in front of him in the near zero temperature, Helga gasped deeply for the air to fill her lungs, despite the icy coldness stabbing into her lungs every time she did so. Arnold began to walk past her, but was stopped by her hand holding him back. He wasn't in the mood for playing games with her; truth be told he didn't want to be anywhere near her.
"I don't want to talk to you Helga."
"Arnold please just wait."
"What is it? I've got better things to do."
Truth be told there wasn't anything better to do. Falling from a cliff would do that to one's prospects.
"I wanted to tell you, but I didn't know how to tell you. Can we go sit down?" She gestured towards a park bench, lit up only by the passing moonlight above.
A wave of regret and joy spread through his body, his mind tumbling over any possible reasoning for Helga being here, of all times, in all of the places in the world, especially Queenstown, New Zealand. But the only reasoning he could form was Gerald and Phoebe; she must have known he would do it…perhaps they had planned it together. Regardless, sitting next to Helga was only bringing back all the things he regretted, all he missed and all he wanted to vanish from forever.
"Firstly I should have told you; Phoebe had suspected Gerald was up to something, so she had me come. Funny how you keep leaving the hotel whenever Phoebe decided wasn't? Whenever I wanted to find you and corner you she would leave."
Well that made leaving whenever Phoebe wanted to seem more logically than 'I just want to go'. "Strange."
"Incredibly; even by Phoebe's standards this was weird. Guess she wanted to give us a chance or something," she sighed, breathing out into the cold night.
Arnold watched the misty breath fade to nothing and sighed himself. Nothing was going to leave him alone now; his fate lay with her, he now knew that. But to what end? Every time they tried to run away from one another, somehow, some way, they always managed to find their way back to one another, inseparable as if this had all been written, all been created for this one moment to finally tell him what his heart needed to hear. But what was it?
"Tell me Helga; why are you here? Why did you come from half way round the world to find me here in Queenstown of all places on earth after you left me in my apartment all those months ago?"
Blushing red, Helga turned away and started to play with her fingers, placing them into her lap, a habit she had developed from the last few months. Usually a cup of tea or coffee was occupying her fingers then, but now wasn't the time.
"I came to find you."
The mumble from her lips barely reached his ears; he could have sworn she wanted to find him. But this did not make sense; why? Why look for him now when everything else had gone so well for him and her in the last few months.
"It's just…Criminey, you'd think I could string a sentence together and tell you how I feel, but no I have to sit here and mumble, stutter and struggle to express the care and love I have for you in my heart," Helga said, clutching her mouth as the last few words left her mouth.
Arnold paused and turned to face her. "You still love me? After everything we have gone through?"
Helga shied away from his look, wishing desperately she had been able to put distance between herself and Arnold right at this moment. "I do Arnold; I never have stopped loving you since the day you came into my life. There was something in your eyes the first time I met you; you had this light, this warming compassion in your eyes that shone so brightly in your soul. I had never seen something like this before, a love and care for someone other than yourself."
"But Helga, it can't work-"
"Who said that Arnold? For once take a chance in your life; I hurt you and I am truly and deeply sorry. But you can't go living your life in self pity, pain and hurt. It isn't healthy, and you will regret never moving on with anything because of it. I know because I went there…I saw those demons you faced….I'm so sorry Arnold."
Pale, Arnold asked his question in the hope he was wrong. "Those demons…they weren't?"
Helga nodded, tears slowly falling down her eyes. "If it wasn't for Olga I…"
Her body gave way as she cried; Arnold hugged her as she fell into his arms, weeping her heart out in the tears that began to stain his jacket. Like cold icicles they fell, shattering to tiny pieces upon Arnold. He held her close, ashamed and hurt; he had driven her there. He had driven his one true love to the near brink of the afterlife. His one true love…it dawned on Arnold now what he was missing; it wasn't her touch or her smell, it wasn't the wonderful personality that he had come to admire beyond anything else; he missed her.
It is hard to describe unless you have been there with another person; a bond formed so strongly and so powerfully that it does feel as though when you are apart from them that the bond has been severed, cut in two leaving both people clinging to the thin parts of their lives instead of being immersed and living together as one. His arms wrapped around her, Arnold began to cry, his emotions unable to hold in what his heart had been carrying for the last few months.
For a while they sat and cried into one another, unable to move of feel anything else despite the biting cold that tore through their clothing. "I love you," he whispered, unable to hold it in any longer. They didn't move apart for an hour, the crying ending but the desire to hold each other greater than before. His watch beeped, signalling eleven o'clock had arrived. Gently resting his head on hers, Arnold dreaded to think of what would if he moved his head away from hers.
"So where do you think we go from here?" Arnold asked as Helga looked up to him with puffy red eyes.
A/N: Well it's not the end but there is one more chapter to go; I couldn't leave it here although it was tempting to. The last one shall decide the fate of these two; might take a week I'm hoping, life permitting. Anyway please R & R and let me know what you think; there could very well be a follow up story for this one, so if you are interested please let me know. Anyway until next time stay well.