It's You, It'll Always Be You
Chapter 12
[Flashback]
To Arizona's dismay, Callie didn't request that transfer and to an even greater annoyance, stayed on her service. They managed to maintain a professional front while in front of the other interns and hospital staff, but things could not be said when they were left alone. Callie sought out every chance she could get, but every time she got close to her, Arizona would find a way to avoid her. Most of the time, she was able to claim she had something work related and run off before Callie could get a word in otherwise. Other times when she couldn't make an immediate escape, she would order Callie to silence and continue giving her the cold shoulder.
It was a rare slow moment in the hospital and Arizona was thankful for a moment to get off her feet and rest up. She trudged to an on-call room and slipped in quickly, turning on the light to see if there were open beds. She saw that the room was mostly empty except for one occupant of a top bunk who groaned from within their blanket cocoon at being woken up by the sudden brightness. "Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't realize it was occupied. I'll go shut off the lights and let you get back to sleep."
"It's alright, Ariz- I mean, Dr. Robbins."
Arizona froze in place upon hearing the voice, immediately recognizing who it belonged to despite it being scratchy and raspy from sleep. "I'm sorry, Callie. I didn't realize it was you in here. I'll let you get back to sleep and find somewhere else to-"
"Don't be ridiculous, Arizona. We're adults; we can share an on-call room and sleep." Arizona's silence only pushed Callie to keep going. "It's just sleep, Arizona. Surely just sleeping in the same room with me won't kill you." She got off the bed and slowly made her way over to Arizona until she was standing directly behind her. "Just stay," she whispered into Arizona's hair, breathing in her scent, automatically being intoxicated by her smell. "I miss you," she said barely loud enough for Arizona to hear her. "Please stay…"
Arizona's body went stiff and was on overdrive feeling Callie pressed up against her back. She was so tired of being angry and hurt and wanted to just forgive Callie right on the spot, but she knew she couldn't give in that easily. The girl standing behind her had broken her heart and betrayed her trust. She lied and devastated her, leaving her completely humiliated in front of her parents. She cursed herself for being so weak and powerless in the presence of this woman who drove her insane. If she just leaned back a few more inches then Callie's lips could… "Don't…"
"Arizona-"
"No! You can't just come in here into my new life and be your charming self. You can't worm your way back in my mind when I worked so hard to block you out and forget about you. I threw myself into my work and was the doctor to watch. I was slowly getting back to something somewhat normal. I didn't want to just crawl under a rock and just cry all day anymore. I didn't want to drink until I felt so numb that I couldn't feel anything anymore. I wasn't feeling sorry for myself and I was almost okay. You don't get to ruin all of that for me. So can you just…"
Callie's hands hovered around Arizona's lower back so close to touching her that Arizona could feel the heat radiating off of hands. Her whole body tingled feeling Callie step even closer to her, nearly trapping her up against the wall. She flinched when she felt Callie rest her head on her shoulder. Hearing Callie's intake of breath was almost too much for her to handle. "I'm so sorry…" Callie whispered out to Arizona, who could feel every drop of emotion laced into those words and she knew that Callie was sincere.
She didn't get a chance to respond because before she could turn around, Callie was already backing away and heading out the door. "I know… I miss you too."
Later that night, Callie found herself sitting alone staring down into her drink. She was lost in thought, still haunted by her conversation with Arizona. She hoped that the alcohol would wash away some of her guilt, but it only made her feel worse. "A beautiful woman such as yourself shouldn't be sitting here looking as sad as you do right now," Callie heard coming from her right. She shook herself out of her thoughts to look at the handsome man smiling back at her. "Mark Sloan, it's a pleasure to you meet you…?"
"Callie Torres. Dr. Callie Torres," she replied, taking his outstretched hand.
"Ah, no wonder you seem so familiar. You work at Seattle Grace, right?" Callie nodded. "Well it's about time I be properly introduced to you then."
Callie couldn't deny that Mark Sloan was a charming, enchanting, no doubt ladies man who was probably used to any and every woman falling over at a chance to jump in the sack with him. She couldn't hold back a little chuckle at that thought. "So, do those lines work for all the women?"
"For some, yeah. For others, they need a little more coaxing," he smiled cockily back at her. "But judging from that, you're probably one of those women who will make me work a little harder, right?"
"Wrong," Oh, how I love his kicked puppy dog look right now. "I'm not 'one of those women' who think they're the luckiest girl by taking you home tonight."
"Well, if you don't want to take me home, my place is certainly up to par as well…"
"Oh my God, shut up! Do you seriously think you have a shot with me tonight?" Mark opened his jaw a couple times to find a comeback, but realized everything he would have said sounded completely idiotic. "That's right. You're much more tolerable with your mouth shut. Get lost, Mark Sloan." Callie spit his name out with such contempt before spinning around in her bar stool and walking out of the bar, leaving Mark to cover her tab.
Callie stood at the nurse's station and watched Arizona out of the corner of her eye finish up some charts as she herself pretended to be working on her own. "Well no wonder you turned me down the other night."
"Excuse you?" Callie rolled her eyes annoyed at the appearance of the pesky plastic surgeon.
"The other night at Joe's, remember? You turned me down and left me with your tab. By the way, you're welcome."
"Is there anything medically related that you need from me, Dr. Sloan? Otherwise, I have a job to get back to."
"Like staring at Blondie over there?" Mark motioned in Arizona's direction. "Like I said, it's no wonder you turned me down. How can I compete when you play for the other team?"
"How dare you. You don't know a thing about me." Callie angrily flipped her chart closed and snuck a glance Arizona's way to find the blonde nowhere in sight, which only irritated her more. "And no, I did not turn you down the other night because I 'play for the other team.' I turned you down because you're an ass!"
"Would I still be an ass if I asked you out for dinner tomorrow night?"
"Are you serious right now?"
"What? Dinner is a great way to get to know each other."
"Oh, is that right?" Mark grinned confidently at her. "Well I can guarantee you that I have no intention or interest in getting to know you."
"Oh, but I can assure you that you do. Because you see, underneath this rugged exterior lies a gentle soul."
"I highly doubt that."
"You'll never know unless you come to dinner with me."
"You're really persistent, aren't you?"
"You intrigue me, Dr. Torres."
"Because I turned you down." It wasn't a question. Just a statement of fact.
"Amongst other things."
Callie furrowed her brow and narrowed her eyes at him. "Fine, one dinner. But that's it."
"Aww, and here I was hoping for a private anatomy lesson with you afterwards."
"Don't push your luck, Sloan. Or I very well might just change my mind."
"Pick you up at 7!"
To Callie's surprise, dinner with Mark was going much better than she anticipated. He was being a gentleman and nothing like their previous two encounters. "Well, I must say, Mark, I am thoroughly impressed."
"What did I tell you, Torres? I'm more than just a pretty face with a scalpel."
"And I'm starting to really like this side of you. You should show it more often."
"No way."
"Why not? You'd certainly be more liked this way."
Mark visibly tensed, clearly uncomfortable with the new, serious, direction the conversation was heading. "I don't want to talk about this anymore."
"Come on, Mark. Having people like you isn't as bad as it seems," she joked. Her expression changed when she noticed that Mark kept averting his eyes towards everything else but her own. "What happened to you that you want to keep people away and not let them know this great guy I see here?"
"God, why do you have to keep pushing me?"
"You took me out tonight to get to know each other better, right?"
Mark pursed his lips into a thin line. He stared Callie down with a frown, hoping she'd give in but released a deep breath when she held his stare and continued casually sipping at her wine. "I have no family. I have no friends. Derek, he was both for a while before I screwed up with us. Since then, I haven't gotten close nor let anyone else get close to me. I just find it easier that way."
"So why decide to be the asshole manwhore?"
"Other than surgery, sex is the only other thing I can offer. It's the only other thing I can do right. So it's just easier to deal with the loneliness. And when I have these one night stands or short flings, I don't get attached and don't get hurt. It's a win-win, really."
"That's not true, Mark. You're good for more than just sex and I think you're worth getting to know in the daytime."
"Thanks, Callie. That's the first time anyone has ever said that to me."
"Well, I mean it. You've proven to me tonight that you are a good guy. Just because you've been hurt in the past doesn't mean you should keep yourself from having relationships with people. Learn from your past, don't hide from it."
"This is definitely the most emotional and interesting first date I've ever had."
"Well I'm definitely not like all the other women you've taken out on a date. So, tell me what happened with you and Derek?"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa there, Torres. That's at least third date status stuff right there. You've already gotten me opening up about my relationship issues; I think that's enough for one night. Besides, here I am doing all this talking and I still know close to nothing about you aside from all those typical things you learn on a first date."
"Fair enough. Go ahead, the floor is yours. What do you want to know?"
"What is up with you and Blondie?"
Callie nearly spit out her wine and started violently coughing. After she calmed, she racked her brain for the right way to answer him. "By 'Blondie', you're talking about Ariz- Dr. Robbins, right?" Mark nodded, leaning on his elbows looking like a high school girl about to hear a juicy piece of gossip. "Umm, there's nothing to tell."
"Oh, come on! Don't give me that crap. I totally saw you staring at her the other day. There has to be something there!"
"First of all, your excitement over all of this is really disturbing. Second of all, you're just jumping to conclusions in your head. We were at the same nurse's station. It's pretty much inevitable for me to glance over at her on occasion."
"Except you were doing more than just giving her a glance."
"You're such a typical straight guy. You see me looking at Dr. Robbins and now there has to be some hot background story on us."
"Well can you blame me? You're a ridiculously hot chick, she's a ridiculously hot chick, I mean you two together is just…mind-blowing!"
Yeah, you got that right… "Even if there was, it wouldn't matter anyways. I'm engaged. To a really wonderful guy who is nothing but sweet and loving."
"I don't see a ring anywhere."
"I don't wear it very often."
"Because?..."
"Because it's nobody's business quite frankly. I like keeping my private life, private, as much as I can with how crazy the rumor mill gets at Seattle Grace."
"Wow, getting a little defensive there are we?"
"Just back off, Mark."
He raised his hands up in defeat. "Alright, alright. I'm sorry. That was probably a little too much for a first date, but you did say the floor was mine and to ask what I wanted to know. I know there's something you're not telling me about Blondie and I'll get it out of you sooner or later. Just know that I'll be here whenever you're ready to talk about it."
"Whatever you say, Mark, whatever you say."
"Now who is the one distancing themselves from people?"
"I beg your pardon?"
"Ever since you started working here, you haven't exactly made a ton of friends with the other doctors and nurses. You're not rude or unfriendly, just unwilling to connect. You make sad puppy dog eyes at Blondie and then put on a bad ass façade for everyone else. One of these days, you'll crack though and you'll tell me what's really going on."
"Oh, you think you're so smart, don't you? Think you've got me all figured out?" Mark was looking rather pleased with himself thinking he was breaking down Callie's defenses. "You don't know anything." She said in a chillingly calm tone. She stood up and gathered up her things. "Thanks for dinner, but I really don't think this is going to work out between us." Once again, Callie left Mark sitting there dumbfounded, all alone with only their tab as his company.
After the disastrous dinner date with Mark, Callie went out of her way to avoid him at all costs. It bothered her that he was able to strike a nerve with his Arizona talk and how close he was with his analysis of her. The truth was, she wasn't particularly interested in befriending her other co-workers. Her mind was strictly on the blonde who she still saw on a daily basis considering she was her resident, but Arizona still remained elusive, dodging the Latina every time they were even close to being alone.
"Torres, you're with Sloan today."
"What? Arizona-" Callie cut herself off when she met Arizona's death glare. "I mean, Dr. Robbins, can you switch me out onto someone else's service?"
"Are you questioning my authority? If you have a problem with my orders then I can just-"
"No, everything is alright. I'm sorry, Dr. Robbins." Callie smiled sweetly at Arizona hoping to see a bit of acknowledgement or compassion, but was quickly dismissed off as Arizona continued assigning the other interns. This day is going to suck.
Working with Mark wasn't as painfully agonizing as she first thought it would be. He was surprisingly really professional to her and they were even working on a really cool case so it was rather tolerable. Well, until their patient started crashing in the OR and they ended up losing him. Although it wasn't the first person to die on her watch, Callie was still pretty affected by it all. After scrubbing out, she immediately ran off to an on-call room before crawling up in one of the beds and finally letting her tears out.
Mark could see that Callie was affected by watching a man literally die right in front of her face and he wanted to reassure her that they did everything they could and sometimes people can seem perfectly fine until they just…aren't. He wanted to talk to her in the scrub room, but she ran off so fast he hardly saw her leave when he walked in. He made sure to wash up as quickly as possible though to go follow her and make sure she was okay. He asked around looking for her when he couldn't see her anywhere in sight and was led to an on-call room tucked in the corner of the surgical wing.
When he walked in, the sight before him nearly broke his heart. There was Callie lying on top of the blankets curled up in the fetal position facing the wall, her body shaking from her silent sobs. He slowly approached the bed and tentatively slid in behind her. He felt her body immediately tense as he wrapped his arm around her, but he was quick to soothe her panic. "Shh, it's alright, Cal. It's just me. You're okay." She started to relax into his embrace after a while and Mark just let her cry, not rushing to get her to talk. "I know that it's really hard to lose a patient, but we did everything we could. It hurts knowing that you couldn't save him, but you just have to move on and focus on the next person, someone who you hope you can save. After a while, you learn how to deal with losing someone so it doesn't hurt as much."
Callie smiled for a moment, endeared by how caring Mark was being, coming after her to make sure she was okay even after she was horrible to him and left him with both her drinks and dinner checks. "Thanks, Mark. Thanks for being here and checking up on me. I guess everything just kind of overwhelmed me. All this drama between Arizona and you was just tiring me out and I suppose this case was just the catalyst that drove me over the edge emotionally. I thought I had it all intact and I could handle being around both you and her, but it's just too much. I'm sorry for avoiding you and treating you like crap. You're a good guy, Mark. You can make yourself one hell of a friend if you'd just allow yourself the chance."
"Let me take that chance then."
"Hmm?"
"With you. Let me be your friend and show me that it isn't really all that bad."
"I don't know, Mark. I-"
"Come on, Cal. You're like the only person who I can stand around here who won't put up with my crap. I think we could be great friends."
Callie thought about it for a minute before rolling over to face Mark. "Alright, alright. I think we can try it out. But no sex, got it?"
"Aww, but where's the fun in that?" Callie's warning glare was enough to shut him up. She obviously wasn't in the joking mood at the moment. "I'm sorry, just kidding, Cal. Why don't you take a quick nap right now? I think it could do you some good after everything that's been wearing you down."
"That doesn't sound half bad. Wow, we're friends all of one minute and you're already offering excellent advice."
"Hey, don't mock me. Anyways, I'll just leave you to-"
"No, please, don't go." Callie protested, holding onto Mark's arm as he started to get up. "I don't want to be alone right now and it's comforting, being here with you if I'm going to be honest."
"Of course, friends are always there for their friends whenever they need comforting." Mark answered as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, allowing her to place her head on his chest and fall into a deep sleep.
Hours later, Callie's sleep was disrupted when someone burst through the door in an extremely noisy fashion. Callie opened her sleep-filled eyes and immediately shot them open when her gaze met ocean blue. Arizona looked distraught and her face was quickly starting to take on a new emotion, anger. "Unbelievable!" She exclaimed before turning on her heels and storming out.
It took Callie a fraction of a second to regroup before jumping over Mark and literally falling off the bed in her rush to catch up to Arizona. Something was wrong with the blonde and she could see it in her eyes even though she only saw her for a moment before anger flashed across her features. "Arizona, wait up!" Callie called after the blonde, hobbling to pull her shoes on in the process.
"Go away, Callie. You should go back to Mark, I'm sure he's already missing you. Sorry to interrupt your precious alone time."
"Now hold on, it wasn't like that at all!"
"Don't lie to me! I know what I saw."
"First of all, you don't get to judge when you haven't even given me two seconds to talk to you about anything anymore. And second of all, don't turn this around and make it about me. I can tell that something's wrong, Arizona. What is it?" Callie looked around to see that all eyes were on them. She looked back over to the blonde to see that she was back to the brink of tears and she quickly led her to the stairwell and away from the curious eyes. "Talk to me, please…"
"He died." Arizona choked out before letting her resolve fade. "Timothy, he-h-he… He's gone and I-I can't-He-Timothy died, Callie. My brother is dead."
[Present Time]
Although Arizona feared for the worst, the page turned out to be a good thing since Carlos finally woke up from his coma. She finally felt some sense of relief knowing that Carlos had made it through and would be okay, pending any nerve damage that would be assessed by Dr. Shepherd in the upcoming days. Everything looked fine so far though, he told them.
It was torture, being in that room with Callie and her father, wanting to wrap Callie up in her arms and celebrate this moment. It didn't help matters at all when Carlos kept throwing her these looks letting her know that he had not forgotten their talk before his aneurysm burst. As much as it pained her, she still didn't want to leave that room. Being in there with a happy Callie and an alive and well Carlos made her have a flashback to when Arizona would go with Callie to Miami to visit the Torres' and everyone got along great. But along with these happy memories from her flashbacks came a giant pain in her heart and she had to excuse herself before she broke down in front of Carlos.
"I'm really sorry, Carlos, but I have to get back to work. I'm super happy that you're okay though and I'll try to stop by later if that's alright with you."
"Of course, of course, Arizona. I'm sorry to have kept you for so long. I take it you've taken care of my Calliope over here when she was, I'm sure, a complete wreck as of late?"
Arizona couldn't help but let out a slight chuckle. This man really did know everything. "She's very stubborn and refused to leave your bedside, but I managed to do the best I could."
"Thank you, Arizona. For always being there for Calliope."
"Daddy, I'm right here you know! And stop embarrassing her." Callie joked, even though she was only half kidding around. She could see the tension Arizona was trying to hide from her father and had to jump in to save her. "But Arizona, if you have a minute, I'd like to have a word with you before you go back."
"Umm, sure. We can walk and talk. See you later, Carlos." Both women exited Carlos' room en route to the PEDs floor. "What'd you want to talk about?"
"Us."
Arizona paused and quickly looked around to see if there was anyone around before dragging Callie into an empty room. "There is no 'us', Calliope. There is a me and Caitlin, and there is a you and George, but there is no 'us', okay? So don't say that."
"No, you don't say that!" Callie's sudden outburst shocked Arizona, but she didn't say anything, allowing Callie to carry on. "You can't tell me that there isn't an 'us' when for the past few weeks we were back to all those years ago, even if it were only a couple moments here and there. The fact of the matter is I still love you and I know you still love me too. So you can't tell me there isn't as 'us', Arizona. I know you're trying to ignore them, but we still have people watching us, waiting for us to give up the front. Everybody can see it! No matter how much you try to distance yourself away from me, you can't ignore the huge elephant in the room."
"You're impossible! Why can't you just leave me alone?"
"Because I love you."
"Stop saying that!"
"Why? It's true. I love you, Arizona Robbins."
"Shut up, shut up!"
"No. I'm not shutting up. I'm not going away. Not this time. I've screwed things up with you way too many times in the past and I am not doing it again. I have this chance to make it right and do what I should have done in the first place. I should have never let you go and I should have fought for you. I shouldn't have let you go all those times that I did. But I'm here now. And I'm staying because I'm going to fight to make sure that you know I'm committed to this thing. I love you, Arizona. And all I'm asking for is one more chance."
"Why are you doing this to me?..." Arizona let out in a pained whisper.
"Because I am still in love with you and you are still in love with me. So come on, give us another chance."
Arizona opened her mouth to say something, but nothing came out. BeepBeepBeep. Saved by the pager though and she rushed off to where she was needed, leaving Callie to just watch her run away.
Just like she promised, Arizona stopped by after her shift to visit with Carlos for a bit before heading home. She texted Caitlin earlier in the day to meet her for dinner after her talk/argument with Callie. Their conversation was on her mind the rest of the day. Where did this sudden proclamation of love come from? Why did Callie decide to start fighting for them out of the blue? What was her situation with George? So many things were crossing her mind, but she also thought of someone who she really needed to talk to, Caitlin. Her loyal, loving girlfriend that stood to get seriously hurt in this sticky situation Arizona found herself in with Callie.
When she got home, she was greeted by Caitlin laid out on her couch watching some random movie that was on with a couple bags of take out on the coffee table in front of her. "Hey, Caitlin."
"Arizona! I hope you're in the mood for Chinese."
"Chinese sounds great. Thank you so much."
"Don't mention it. So how was your day? How's Carlos?"
"It was the standard day for a doctor I suppose. Not too exciting in that sense. Just a routine appendectomy and charting. But Carlos finally woke up from his coma and Derek says he should be okay pending any nerve damage."
"That's fantastic! I take it that Callie's over the moon about it?"
"Yeah, she's awesome. It's good to see her not so stressed out again. Actually, that's what I wanted to talk to you about."
"Callie?"
"Yeah…"
"What about her?"
It's now or never, Robbins. "Well, I haven't been 100% truthful with you about her." Arizona could already feel the tears welling up in her eyes and her throat was starting to constrict a little.
"It's okay, baby. Just talk to me."
Having Caitlin be so patient and caring was making everything hurt more as Arizona took in a deep breath to start. "I know I told her that she was an old friend from med school, which is true, but I didn't tell you the whole truth about our relationship. We were together a long time ago and I was honestly in love with her." She paused and looked apologetically over to Caitlin, seeing her body tense hearing her words. "But it turned out that she was engaged to George, the son of her father's business partner. I was so hurt and betrayed that I left LA early and came up here to Seattle to clear my head and start my life over with my internship, but she followed me up here and she was persistent. I kept ignoring her as much as I could, but when my brother died, I really needed someone to be there for me, so I stopped shutting her out and let her be my friend. Then when she got married, she moved to San Francisco with George and we managed to stay friends after I met you. Things were easier to deal with with her being in a different city and I didn't have to face her and her husband on a daily basis. I was okay, you know? I was happy with you and everything was alright. But then she shows up again here with Carlos and I just… It's too much for me to handle. All these old feelings just keep bubbling up to the surface and I'm not sure if I can handle them for much longer."
For the entire time Arizona was talking about her history with Callie, Caitlin sat there and listened attentively. Even though she had known pretty much what happened between the two from the hospital staff after Callie's arrival, it still hurt when Arizona started talking about her uncertainty about her feelings. "Have you done anything with her since she's been here?"
"What? No. Caitlin, I wouldn't cheat on you like that. You know me better than that."
"I'm sorry, it's just the first thing that pops into your head. The girl your girlfriend never got over comes into town and spends the night in their bed and everything, what was I supposed to think?"
"I know, but I promise I haven't cheated."
"Okay."
"But," Caitlin's look of panic returned to her face. "I don't want to have the chance of possibly cheating on you." Caitlin's face changed from panic to confusion. "I'm saying that we should go on a break. I need some time to think and maul over all these thoughts and feelings with having Callie back. I'm not saying that it's going to happen, but if something does end up happening with Callie, I don't want to end up betraying you in the process. I know what it's like to be cheated on and I would never want to put you through that."
Tears started rolling down her face and Caitlin couldn't do a thing to stop them. "No, no. You're right. You should- You should take some time to figure stuff out. I don't want you feeling tied down and unable to act on your feelings for Callie, whatever those feelings may be, on account of me."
"Come on, Caitlin. It's not like that at all."
"Oh yeah? Could have fooled me."
"I just… I need some time, okay? I need time away from both you right now. And I need to do it for real this time. I'm doing this for me, okay? I'm doing this so I can figure out what's going on with me and her. This isn't a cop out so I can go jump into bed with her, alright? It just doesn't feel right staying with you when I have all these uncertainties about another woman. I'm trying to do the right thing here. I'm sorry about all of this, okay? I never asked for her to come back here and screw everything up."
"I know you didn't, baby. I'm sorry. I just- It hurts. It hurts knowing that you're even questioning your feelings for me and her right now. I wish you could just push it away and choose me, but it's not that easy, I know. So I guess I'll go gather up my stuff and leave."
"No, you don't have to leave right away. You can still stay for dinner."
"I don't think that's really the best idea right now." Caitlin replied sadly, gathering her things and leaving Arizona's apartment.
The next few days, Arizona stayed away from Callie and Carlos as well. Seeing the Latina would just continue to make things more complicated and she truly needed the space she talked about with Caitlin. So far, she had been lucky, not running into Callie in the halls, elevator, cafeteria, or stairwells and she was relieved at having a chance to sort of clear her mind. Her luck ran out though when she spotted an angry Callie marching towards her in hallway.
"Arizona Robbins don't you dare turn away from me!"
Arizona froze and turned around to face a fuming Callie. "Calliope, I was just-"
"No, no. Don't you 'Calliope' me. You've been avoiding me. I tell you I still love you and you react like an immature kid and run away from me and hide every chance you get. What the hell, Arizona? We're not in high school! If you can't just admit your feelings, then tell me straight up. Don't play hide-and-go-seek like-"
Arizona yanked Callie into, coincidentally, 'their' on-call room and slammed her up against the door, effectively pinning her in place before capturing the full lips in front of her with her own. Arizona threw in all her emotions into the kiss which soon became extremely heated and full of passion. Arizona traced her tongue along Callie's bottom lip, waiting for her to accept the silent invite. Their tongues dueled for supremacy as Callie's hands began roaming around Arizona's body, wanting to feel more of her, needing to feel more of her. Her hands traveled from the golden blonde locks, down her to her shoulders then down her sides, passing over the slight swell of her breast, earning a groan from Arizona. She settled her hands on Arizona's hips, pulling her closer, needing to feel her as much as she could.
Arizona grabbed her hands though, much to Callie's dismay, away from her hips. Instead, she pinned them above Callie's head, which only turned the Latina on even more. All these years, all the moments where they almost gave in to their desires, all the pent up sexual frustration was being released here. Arizona left Callie's lips and started kissing over to her ear, nipping at the sensitive skin, her breath hot on Callie's already burning skin. She could do nothing but surrender herself to the feelings Arizona was stirring up inside her, pressing her up against the wall with her hands pinned above her head.
Arizona kept kissing down her neck until settling on her pulse point and alternated between sucking and nipping the spot causing Callie to throw her head back in pleasure. She was pretty sure Arizona was going to leave a mark, but at this point, she couldn't care less since the only thing she could concentrate on was Arizona's mouth doing exquisite things to her body while her hand was… Wait, where was her hand going? When Arizona right hand finally made it descent down Callie's body and ended up dancing along the waistband of Callie's pants, Callie knew she had to stop this. It nearly killed her since the only thing she wanted at that moment was to feel Arizona inside of her, bringing her to an extreme high that she had been missing for years, but this wasn't the time, nor place she wanted it to happen.
"Stop, stop…" She said breathlessly. "Arizona, you have to stop." She said a little stronger this time.
"Why? Do you not want me? This?"
"You couldn't be more wrong. I want you so incredibly bad right now, it's out of this world."
"Then why do you want me to stop?"
"This isn't right. Rough, on-call room sex is not how I want my first time back with you to be. Plus, I don't want you to do something that you'll regret later."
Arizona's bottom lip started quivering, a sign of her impending tears. "I'm so sorry, Calliope."
"No, no. It's okay. Don't apologize. I just want things to be right first, before we dive right back into this. But please, don't think that I don't want you. Because I want you. Really, really bad."
"No, I mean, I'm sorry. Calliope. A while ago, that first time at the park when we almost kissed, I had to make a choice. And ever since then, I've been pulled back and forth in this game of tug-o-war. You or Caitlin? You or Caitlin? You made it really clear the other day that you were in this to make it work." She paused and sadly looked up into Callie's eyes. "I'm so sorry, Calliope." She leaned and kissed her one more time, a sob continually threatening to escape from her lips. "But I choose Caitlin."
First of all, I can't apologize enough for taking this long to write this chapter. I know that I'm horrible, but for those who have stuck around and are still with me, thank you so much for not giving up on me. I haven't forgotten about this story, it's just that life and school get in the way a lot.
The good news is, I AM DONE WITH MY FIRST YEAR OF COLLEGE! I don't have to juggle a full class load anymore. Hurray! =]
Also, I felt the incredible need to stay up and finish this chapter because of how horrible the season finale was tonight. I felt that Shonda ripped us all off and so I was going to try to make it a tad more bearable by finally updating! Plus, this chapter is extra super long to try to compensate a little for my absence.
I'm rambling now, I apologize very muchly. And if that on-call room scene sucked too, I apologize for that as well. I'm still a newbie at this stuff over here!
Anyways, I hope you liked this chapter. Let me know what you think by dropping a line or two, yeah? It seriously makes my day to see such a high response from you guys. I write this for y'all so I would be nothing without my readers. Hello if you are a newbie just finding this fic of mine. Yell at me and push for me to update a million times faster this time. =D
~Rox