Well, would you look at that? I actually managed to update! And I think to celebrate I will now go read BadBoysAreBest and Temptress- Kitten17's most amazing stories. I know…I spoil myself too much sometimes. And by the way, this morning I found out that during Comic Con for Vampire Diaries there was a 6 second clip of Elena walking in on Damon in the shower… completely naked and all soapy. That's right ladies. It's going to be a big season alright.

I always remember there being a time when I thought that night was the greatest magic that the world had to offer. The time when the sun finally dipped behind the mountains and covered the atmosphere with brilliant shades of pinks, oranges and yellow's, and the moon peeked its way into the sky. The moments where I would hold my Mother's hand as we paraded in sync with each other, one little toddler's foot next to a larger and much more practiced one, one that had seen the world for its good and its bad, as we danced around that old Sycamore tree that we conveniently named Old Smokey and caught fireflies in glass jars with holes stabbed in the top. Or the time I was taken on my very first camping trip with my Father. I remember feeling so safe and content with myself when we played flashlight tag from behind tree's as tall as the world and stayed up half the night just gawking at the stars, trying to see who could discover the Little Dipper the fastest. Dad always won, but he seemed to find it humorous when he swore that I spotted it first.

Jeremy was born late in the evening, much to my enthusiasm. I was three at the time and I vowed to him as soon as I placed my eyes on his chocolate ones that I would show him just how great the night was, and that he needn't be afraid. Because I was there and my Father and Mother were there and that was all he needed. Everything was wonderful and nighttime was the most anticipated part of my day. I couldn't wait to journey in my bed after a warm, vanilla scented bath and look outside while my Mother brushed my hair. I had snubbed getting it cut and when it finally got in the way of when I sat down she insisted. I bawled that day, recalling viewing my hair as it fell to the floor in little tufts. When the Stylist swept it up with a brush I just remember wailing harder. For some odd reason I thought I could keep the hair for my own, even though it wasn't devoted to me anymore.

I also remember one of the poems my Mother would tell me every night. She continuously tried to talk me into another one; a different one, but I was hooked. I worshipped the ode and yet she still tried to no avail. The poem was a part of my childhood and I intended to tell it to my child, too.

It went like this:

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leafs a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

I always fathomed the reason I adored the verses so much was because it prompted me to stay humble; it told me that nothing you loved more than life itself could stay with you, no matter what it was.

And now I could honorably say that this poem was the truest thing I had come to having my fortune told. My parents, who I had respected and loved more than any silly old tale, were now gone. Because nothing gold can stay and that is just how life is. Your entire group of loved ones will eventually die and the most delicious pie in the world will soon be gone…the prized petunias growing in your backyard will be dried and falling apart. It is the circle of life but that doesn't mean it makes it any less hard.

After my parents died I found that instead of the night welcoming me like a giant, invisible pull it began to mock me; began to laugh at my very being. It questioned why I was alive when everyone I ever adored was dead. I tried to coax myself in to believing that even though my life was now surrounded by death that I could still evoke my love for the night. But it didn't work, it never did. I would walk home faster from the library when I got done studying late, not even glancing in the direction of the delicate and gossamer fountain that was positioned out in front of it. I just wanted to get home fast so that the blackness would not bring up the memoirs of the worthy times I had with my family; the times I could no longer have now that Jeremy was placed in his own little bubble of defeatism. Instead of naturally agreeing to all the sleepovers, late night gatherings and bonfires that my friends and class-mates had to offer, I found myself declining to every single one of them, terrified that people would see I wasn't the same fun-loving, easy-going and loveable Elena Gilbert everyone grew up with. I was the new Elena Gilbert that was petrified by the thought of facing the darkness that the world brought up.

What I once loved, I now despised.

And it didn't cease there. Instead of just being damaged for life because the darkness brought up happy memories I couldn't handle, I now had to worry about the vampires with their gleaming fangs and the ability to kill you without blinking or you even realizing what was going on until it was too late. I had to watch my back in case any werewolf's decided they wanted to make a midnight snack out of me or some pissed of witch wanted to tear me limb from limb just by using her mind.

I guess the reality was that the world was growing up, turning into an unpleasant territory, and I wasn't.

And tonight was no exception. I was nervously flitting around the room, tidying up whatever I could find for no reason what so ever. Figuring out that a major case of OCD flared up when I was nervous or anticipating something was probably the least of my worries right now. I was about to spill the beans about Damon and I. I didn't really know what cleaning my room was going to do, maybe I thought it would lessen the blow if I told Jenna in a clean sanctuary, but it sure seemed to help a little bit. My hands had finally stopped shaking and that was very good improvement. Earlier it felt like I couldn't breathe and after chanting to myself that I was just overreacting I managed to settle myself down.

God, it wasn't like I was going into war or something. I was only going to tell my Aunt and parental guardian that I was now dating my vampire ex-boyfriends vampire brother and sleeping with him. Nothing weird at all as far as I could tell. Just another day in the life of me. I hoped Damon knew how ludicrous this all was. When Jenna went after him with a chainsaw I wasn't going to stop her. Served him right anyway.

I was having one of the those moments where I wished that my Mom was actually hear, standing next to me and telling me what to do. What would she make out of all this? Would I honestly have told her right from the beginning that there were such things as vampires and that I was dating one? Even if she didn't she would still understand the boy problems I seem to keep on having. I already knew that she would have liked Damon better anyway. She always had that rebellious streak and that witty fire in her that seemed so much like Damon's that I couldn't help but laugh at some times. They were always trying to be the hero and sometimes they succeeded and other times they fell flat. They always had an opinion, whether it was asked for or not, and there tongues had a funny way of constantly getting them in trouble. But they were brave, strong types of people, if a bit confusing and hard to place. Not everybody was used to their bluntness and the way they saw the world. So, yeah. I guess I knew Damon's type long before I even met him.

But Jenna? She was a completely different story. She was almost exactly like my Mom, the same fire and wit, but where my Mom loved the tough boy attitude, Jenna just seemed to despise it. Mom always used to say that it was because Jenna had been burned by so many of those rebellious men that she had sworn them off for good. So somewhere deep inside Jenna she was reminded by those men whenever she saw, talked to or even heard Damon's name. And that may not seem very fair (it's my life, so why can't I do what I want?) but maybe Jenna just wants me to look out for myself so that I don't make the same mistakes she did. But I doubt that Damon is even half the sleaze-bag her many boyfriends were.

The desk that held my diary was dusted and ready for whatever was going to go down tonight when I heard a soft tap on my window. Wonderful. The wrongdoer himself. Infect, I almost contemplated just not letting him in but when I looked at his eyes…I was gone. Way to be strong, Gilbert.

I carefully slid the window open, trying to make as little noise as possible so Jenna wouldn't have an excuse to come up earlier than I had planned.

When Damon bounded over the window sill, landing with a soft thud at my feet, he gave me an expecting grin. "Nice prison cell you got here. Mmm… the bed is even smaller than I remember." He leaned over and almost caught me in a kiss when I remembered that there was no fooling around tonight. This was series business and I could not afford to be distracted right now.

"Yeah," I said, making a show of dodging his lips and the hand creeping to my thigh. "Well you're not going to be testing that out tonight. You're the one who wanted me to tell Jenna in the first place. Why are you suddenly being the responsible one?" Making up for dissing him so pointedly, I grabbed his hand and led him over to my bed. I pushed him down. Technically this wasn't fooling around. I just wanted to get his full and undivided attention.

"Whoa, what are you do-" I cut him off with a kiss to the hollow in his throat, my tongue dipping and then nipping it slightly, probably breaking the skin more than I meant to. But Damon doesn't complain. I spread his thighs apart and settled in between them, wondering if he was going to do anything while this was going on. He didn't do anything though, much to my relief. He seemed to know that I just wanted to grab his attention. The only way to do this was to give him a preview of what he sought. He mostly resembled a puppy with a one track mind and I briefly wondered if he had ADD as a human; maybe even ADHD. He sure seemed like the compulsive type. Just like my Mom was.

My fingers hunted down the buckle to his belt as my lips were busy probing his, wanting a response, and hearing the satisfying clank of metal as it was undone. I pulled him closer by the loops in his jeans, our hips pressing together and even then I could feel how hard he was, and pushed his black shirt up above his heaving stomach. And yet, he hadn't said a word, not one little moan just in case Jenna would hear. This boy was good. I kissed a trail from his sternum to the skin that met up with the edge of his jeans, unsnapping them and pulling the zipper down with teeth. And this is where it had turned in to a competition. Instead of just doing this to grab his focus, I did it because I was going to make him moan; make him give me a satisfying response. He was going to break the stone wall barrier that he called 'experience.'

His jeans were pooled to the floor before he could protest, probably wanting to say something along the lines of 'you have to talk to Jenna!' but I wasn't going to let him get a word in this time. I could tell he was going to give in, could tell that he was trying so hard just to keep his mouth shut by clamping on his bottom lip so hard that he drew blood. His Boxer-briefs were slowly inching its way down. I tried to convey to him with my eyes that all he had to do was say something, moan, whimper, whatever the vampires do and then I would stop and go talk to Jenna. The faster I did that then the faster we could just finish what we had started. But still, his mouth was in a tight line and his eyes were squeezed shut, as if he was trying to block from his memory what I was about to do.

Before I pulled the Boxers completely off, I nipped at his sharply defined pelvic bone and traced it all the way to his belly button, the trail of dark hair disappearing into his Boxer's tickling my chin. I stopped; sucking on the sensitive spot just under the hard muscle at his waist that I knew was his sweet spot. And now all I had to do was inch the damned underwear off and grab between his legs until he-

"Okay, okay! You win. I give in!" The tone Damon gave me was satisfying enough. He sounded winded, like he had just run a whole marathon without stopping for a drink.

I wiped my mouth with the back of my sleeve and gave him a big grin, not even caring that he practically yelled all this at me. I patted the noticeable hardness between his legs, watched him squirm from the contact, and whispered, "Years of experience my ass."

He grumbled incoherent sentences to no one in particular as he stood on shaky feet and readjusted his shirt and put his jeans back on his slim hips, wincing as he buttoned them up. It must be uncomfortable to be a horny dude wearing jeans. It sure looked like it was uncomfortable. The thought of this causing Damon displeasure made me happy all over again. I was going to take my time talking to Jenna just so I could drag it out for him. Then we'll see how he likes it.

"Oh," I suddenly said. "Was there a reason you came here?"

Damon looked at me with disbelief. "Well, I was going to say good luck with Jenna and maybe get a kiss or two but instead it turned out into a whole sex-a-thon." Oh, whoops. Maybe he wasn't trying to compete with me. Oh well. One point for me! He turned away from me, a wild look in his hazy blue eyes. "I'm going to go take a cold shower. Have fun with Jenna and try not to make her too mad."

"So, you're not going to hide in the closet? That is what I had originally planned."

He started at me like I had suddenly sprouted wings on my forehead. "You wanted me to what?"

I shrugged indifferently. "Hide in my closet. That way you would be able to hear all the stuff she says so I won't have to repeat it to you later. It makes sense." Why was he still staring at me like that?

"Don't you think that would be a little creepy?" Damon's eyebrows scrunch up at the middle, looking like the worlds most confused vampire.

"Creepier than you climbing up my window to see me?" I chuckle, a light settling sound that bounds off the corners of my room and back to my ears.

Damon's eyes narrow and he points an accusing finger at me. "I get what you're doing." He shakes the finger. "You're just trying to distract me so you can buy time and not have to talk to Jenna."

I lift my shoulders again but I can't help the small smile edging on my lips. Had all his male testosterone gone straight to his head? He was acting like he didn't have a brain. "I think you better go before you say something really stupid, Damon." I gave him a little push towards the window. "I'll call you when I'm done and don't fall out that window."

Damon rolled his eyes, seeming more like his old self. "I'm not a complete moron." And with that he was gone.

Maybe I really should have let him stay in the closet. I felt alone and uncomfortable and awfully scared in this position. But then again, I was strong! I could take on vampires and just about everything else under the sun and I could completely just take on one parent. No biggie. But I still had this nagging feeling that maybe Damon should have just compelled her into thinking that she was completely okay with the idea of Damon dating me. But that was absurd. I could never do that and live with the nagging guilt forever bordering my conscience. I would do this even if it killed me. Well, at least I hoped it didn't.

Before I could talk myself out of this, I marched down the stairs, acting like the most confident person I could think of. And that would be Damon himself. I turned the corner and stood in the living room where Jeremy and Jenna lounged on the sofa, watching some dumb cop show, both of them completely unaware of my raising pulse. I cleared my throat and tried to get the attention of anyone who was willing to listen to me in my time of need. Jenna turned towards me and Jeremy just sat still, his eyes glued to the racing police and bright lights.

I rolled my eyes at his reaction. He was such a boy sometimes. I hesitantly turned back over to Jenna's face, calm and patient. "Can I -uh- talk to you for one sec?"

She smiled, flashing her perfect white teeth. "Sure, just come and sit down." She patted the spot next to her. Yeah right. Because I totally wanted Jeremy in on this conversation. Over my dead body.

I shifted nervously and jerked my thumb over my shoulder. "Alone? Can I talk to you alone, please?" The hesitation in her eyes was clear but she stood anyway and walked close by me. Jeremy didn't even notice. I led the way to my room, each step heavy, as if I were walking to my own grave or going to confess of the horrible murder I committed. Shutting the door behind me quietly, I turned to Jenna.

"I think you might want to sit down for this one." I took a seat from my desk chair and faced her as she sat on the edge of my bed. The clock that clicked digitally seemed to be making the most noise right now. "Do you remember how Mom met Dad?"

Jenna looked like she was going to object to the question by the way her face paled but she quickly recovered and cleared her throat. "She was dating this one guy; I think his name was Samuel Tockett, who had the scholarship to Harvard. But Samuel had a best friend, your Dad, and when he was introduced to your Mom by Samuel it was love at first sight. But nobody told Samuel about that and your Mom and Dad were secretly seeing each other behind his back. Nobody had the nerve to tell the poor guy or anybody else. Your Father was considered," she coughed into her sleeve slightly before continuing. "a rebel. He would skip classes and had this horrible tendency to keep getting himself in trouble even though everyone knew he meant well. Even I knew. But when Samuel found out that they were going behind his back he tried to do horrible things to break them up. He sabotaged your Mom's acceptance to an Ivy-league collage and tried to frame a store robbery on your Father. But in the end they all lived happily ever after, together forever, even now." She smiled as if in fond remembrance and then her lips slowly formed into a frown again. "And why are you asking me this exactly."

I couldn't even muster the energy to put on a fake smile for her. So I didn't answer her. "Did you approve of the relationship? I mean, she was a good girl in most ways and he was so different from her. He was the bad boy. Did that bother you?"

"Well," she shrugged. "Of course it did at first but it was out of my hands. They were in love. What kind of person would I be to try and break them up?"

"Probably a Samuel. So, what you're saying is that as long as the two people really like each other it doesn't matter where they come from or what they act like?"

Jenna nodded her head and crossed her feet at the ankles. "Yup, pretty much. The heart wants what the heart wants. You can't tell someone who they have to love. Then it's not even love anymore."

I smiled at her answer. Maybe Jenna was exactly the person who would understand my predicament.

"So…would you care to explain what brought all of this on? You couldn't have just thought to ask me how they met right at this very minute."

I shook my head. "No, you're right. There is something I have to tell you. I just don't know how hard you're going to take it. Just promise me that before you judge me just hear what I have to say in my defense."

Her arms crossed over her chest. "You're not like…pregnant are you?"

I stared at her in horror. Who did she think I was? At least I had chosen the smart thing and gone with the guys who couldn't reproduce. That had to count for something, right? "Oh, God no. Not until I'm like 25, Jenna. Jeez."

She outstretched her hands, as if she were surrendering herself. "Hey, when teenage girls say they want a 'private talk' it usually means there knocked up and/or have some rare STD."

I wanted to face palm myself right in the forehead. This talk was not going in the direction I hoped it would. "Alright, I'm just gonna come out and say it." Jenna nodded, signaling me to continue on with myself. "I'm…going out with…Damon. As in Damon Salvatore. As in Stefan's big brother Damon Salvatore."

If I thought that her face had blanched before now she was just a ghostly pale figure in a soft brown cotton dress. "You saying that almost makes me want to take away everything I said about love having no limits. How is this even possible? When did you even decide that he could be the one for you? He's like 6 years older than you, Elena!"

I flinched at that sentence. I was always very touchy feely when it came to that subject. Technically, he was about 150 years older than me but why dwell? Age was just a number. "I can't explain it right now, Jenna. I don't know how it happened or what changed my mind but all I know is that I want it to work. I want it to work more than anything in the world. Just let me be happy. Please, can you at least do that for me? I know that every time you see him you want to kick him where it hurts but if you just give him a chance I think you'll really find out that you like him-"

I was quickly shut up by a hand waving in front of my face. "Fine, if this is what you want then take it. Take it and run and never look back. But if you get kicked to the curb don't come crying to me. This is your warning, Elena. I hope you're not making one of the biggest mistakes of your life right here." She stood and roughly shut the door behind her.

Yeah, so do I. I thought.

Okay, actually got this update done! Score! Please review. They are my guilty pleasure…

Love Eden