DEGRASSI IS BACK IN 2 DAYS. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? I CANNOT.

Thank you for the wait and for your reviews. You are all amazing.

Chapter Five – The Truth

Eli wasn't expecting any details. He had said what he knew about Clare to her and seeing her cry, seeing her become vulnerable through her weirdly tough exterior, Eli didn't want to see her hurting again. As he held her in his arms and heard her mixture of sniffling and deep breathing, she was at her most vulnerable state. It was actually heartbreaking.

"They divorced because my mom started using drugs and abusing alcohol," Clare began. Her eyes were focused on Eli's shirt as she kept her hand over his heart. He was trying really hard to control his rapidly pulsing heart rate but a beautiful girl was in his arms. It was difficult to even breathe.

"It got to the point where…my dad was afraid to even have me near her," she continued. "So he took me without telling my mother first. She was angry and wanted to get me back but seeing as she was a drunk and a druggie, that was definitely not going to get past court. Things got a lot worse with her over the years and she had a friend who lived around here that helped her out. But she ran away, don't know where, don't know when."

"So…why are you here?" Eli asked nervously.

Clare tilted her head up and looked into Eli's eyes. Eli was able to see the sadness in Clare's normally shining blue eyes. It could've been the lighting in the dark room but her eyes became borderline navy. It was strange to see Clare looking so dark.

"My mom's friend called my dad and said she was missing. And…my first thought was…who's going to run the inn?"

Eli felt Clare's head fall back onto his chest and she started to cry again. "Does that make me a terrible daughter?"

As Clare cried, Eli adjusted his arms to hold her closer and his chin rested on the top of her head. He let her cry more, avoiding saying the wrong thing, and knowing that Clare didn't want that question to be answered because in her mind, she had answered the question herself.

"I'm sorry," Clare said after a little while. "This must not be how you imagined your vacation. Having to console an emotionally damaged girl."

Feeling a little brave, Eli took his hand and lifted Clare's head up so she would look at him. "That's okay," he smiled.

Clare pressed her lips together as she looked at him and Eli heart raced even more. She then bit her bottom lip as she looked at his own lips and he didn't even have time to think when Clare reached up and kissed him.

Eli tensed up as she felt Clare's hand slowly moving up his chest and then went to wrap around his neck. He hadn't felt such a sensual touch, a desired one anyways, in a long time. Clare's hand clutched his hair a little roughly and she started moving her lips. Eli was still not reacting favorably and Clare seemed to sense it and made the move to move back but Eli pressed their lips together further, his hand clutching her shirt.

When Clare maneuvered her body over his, Eli had to pull away as his air supply was being constricted from the pressure and the fact that he hadn't even taken a breath as Clare took his away.

But Clare had other ideas as she dove in for another kiss, kissing Eli earnestly and deeply, and her fingers now tightly gripping his hair. Eli slowly took his hand from her back to her neck and pulled her closer.

Eli couldn't breathe. His heart was pounding. Lips on fire. Mind racing. But he loved every second of it. Kissing Clare Edwards in only the moonlight streaming in. Was there any way that a moment could be more perfect? Eli didn't think so.

Clare pulled her lips away suddenly and sat up and Eli admired the view of the swollen lipped Clare with a flushed face.

"Oh my God."

"Not the reaction I thought you'd have…"

She jumped off of his lap and started pacing around the room, a hand to her forehead. "Oh my God, Oh my God."

Eli sat up, adjusting his jeans a little bit. Since he had changed earlier into regular jeans, his problem was a lot more noticeable. He watched as Clare seemed to have a battle with herself as she muttered the same phrase over and over.

"I swear to God Clare, if you don't stop—"

"That never happened."

Eli tried hiding his disappointment but his face, he knew, just said it all. "Clare, we can't just forget that that happened because it did."

"No, it didn't," Clare said seriously. "That couldn't have happened, I just met you! I don't do this!"

"And you think I do this all the time?" Eli retorted with a snort. "It's not all the time that I meet someone on a vacation and then make out with them."

"We did not make out," Clare scoffed, trying to hide her embarrassment.

"You are the one who kissed me and you are the one who got on top of me, isn't that right?" Eli was teasing at this point, just loving the fact that Clare was getting redder by the word. He walked up to her and at first she was going to push him away but he took her hands and linked their fingers. "And I didn't mind any of it." Eli muttered those words before sweeping down and capturing Clare's lips by surprise, making her squeak and Eli took the opportunity to touch his tongue to hers. Although the kiss was not innocent, it was rather slow and passionate. Eli took the opportunity to back Clare up against the wall, their hands still connected tightly.

When Eli pulled away, he noticed Clare still had her eyes clothes and lips slightly parted. She looked breathtaking and natural. When she finally opened her eyes again, the navy darkness was replaced by the usual light blue. He leaned down and kissed Clare's eyelids which fluttered closed. Then her nose, and cheek.

"Did this happen?" Eli whispered in Clare's ear and he felt her shiver.

"I…I don't know…" Clare stuttered.

With one final peck to Clare's lips, Eli stepped away from her. "Sleep on it then," he told her. Then he walked upstairs.

The following morning, Eli found Clare still sleeping in her room. The closed door was the signal, since her door was never closed unless she was still in bed. He wanted to see her, after dreaming of her and replaying the kiss many times in his dreams, but she said that she didn't know if she wanted it to happen. He gave her the choice and he needed to wait for what the decision was.

He heard a knock on the main door and he quietly made his way downstairs, and found a big shipping box right in front of the door. It was his name on the label and he realized it was the catalytic converter that he had ordered for Clare's truck. He smiled and quickly changed his clothes into something more comfortable for him to work in, and he got to working quickly.

Thankfully he had brought his iTouch with him so he'd have some music to entertain him. He clicked on one his playlists and set aside the iTouch in a safe place and after opening the box and retrieving the piece, he went on to fix up Clare's truck.

Having his hands oily and holding steel tools, Eli was brought back to working on his dad's classic cars. Bullfrog liked collecting them, thinking his son could have the choice of his first car among them, but Eli chose to drive a hearse. They fixed up Morty together, getting it to run beautifully, and ever since then, Eli had a big passion for cars.

He tried to work as slowly as possible. Not only to ensure that the part was replaced accurately, but to enjoy the time and preserve the moment. He hadn't worked on a car in a long time, not since what happened, and getting his hands dirty again was as relaxing as he'd imagined.

The distraction was a quick one though because after only a few hours, Eli was almost finished. He wiped his oily hands on a rag and reached for a different tool in the toolbox Clare had in the truck bed but was met with something soft.

Eli turned his head and stood up straight when he saw Clare, still in her pajama pants and a loose shirt plus a severe case of bed head. It must've been past noon and yet here she was still looking like she wanted to sleep.

"How long have you been working?" Clare asked him.

Eli didn't have his phone or a watch to check the time so he shrugged. "At least 2 Dead Hand albums, I'd say."

Clare had a conflicting look on her face, along with squinting eyes because of the bright sun, and Eli couldn't help but be nervous of what she was going to say. She definitely looked like she needed to tell him something and he just wish she'd say it.

"Last night…" she began and Eli put a hand up. He walked over to his music and turned it off, making his way back to her.

"Okay, continue," Eli said. They were standing in front of Clare's exposed truck. It was weird placement but for some reason it seemed fitting.

"Last night," Clare repeated. "I…poured my secret out to you and…I guess I was feeling sad and depressed and hurt and just everything that happened with her just came out at that moment."

Eli nodded, dreading the direction this was going. She was going to say that they should forget about last night, that it never happened, that it was a mistake. Eli really had no idea how it was possible that he fell for Clare that fast, that he developed such a desire for her not only for how she made him feel but for the fact that she was strong and independent and refreshingly different.

"You think I manipulated your sad feelings last night…" Eli stated, but questioned it. "I took advantage of the situation…"

"No!" Clare said quickly and Eli sighed in relief. "That's not it at all!"

"Then what is it?"

"I don't trust myself around you."

"What are you talking about?" Eli reached over for the rag again and started cleaning his hands more diligently, but it wasn't working well.

Clare groaned and looked away. "I can't take you seriously when you're sweaty and dirty so can you please take a shower before we continue?"

Eli smirked and closed the hood of Clare's truck. He walked towards the door and as he passed Clare, he whispered to her, "Would you like to join me?"

Clare shoved his shoulder and pointed towards the door. She had a flustered expression and Eli just smirked at her until he made it into the house.

His new found confidence was very surprising. Eli always thought of himself as a no-holds barred, confident, honest kind of guy. But he was never as blunt about things such as this, like calling out sexual tension like he just did with Clare. Last night he was more confident as he joked with Clare about their steamy first kiss. Clare was bringing out a new side of him and he didn't mind it. He knew that this side was probably caused by the chemistry between them. It was obvious. He knew it was obvious the moment they met.

Eli showered and cleaned himself up as quickly as he could in order to talk to Clare. He wanted to know what she had to say. He wanted to know what her hesitance was. Why doesn't she trust herself around him?

When he went back downstairs, Clare was in the kitchen. It seemed that she was making cookies, as she was dumping chocolate chips into a light looking batter.

"Am I clean enough now?" Eli teased.

Clare rolled her eyes and stopped mixing the batter. She turned her head and looked at him. "You make me question everything."

"I'm sorry?"

"I was so sure of myself, I knew who I was when I came here, and my focus was just to get this place running," Clare said rather quickly. She was pacing around the kitchen, much like she was doing the night before in the living room. "And you come along and it's only been just a little bit more than a week and suddenly, you know more about me than anyone else in the world."

Eli felt a little flattered but Clare's tone wasn't very assuring.

"I don't know what it is about you," Clare slowly said, looking at Eli with softer eyes. "But all of a sudden I'm willing to…be swept off my feet and I barely even know you."

"We have all summer," Eli said. "You can get to know me."

"Exactly, and that scares me," Clare confessed. "I don't get to know people because once I do, they're gone."

The vulnerable side of Clare came out once more and Eli stepped forward to her, cupping her cheek. "Take a risk on me," he whispered. "I don't know what it is about you either but…I am so willing to find out what it is."

Clare reached up to Eli's hand on her face and she put her fingers between his. "Yesterday…do you remember what we talked about in the morning?"

"We were talking about why I was the only one here and you told me a slightly different version of the truth," Eli recalled.

"Do you remember what I said after you asked me where my mom was?"

Eli thought back, replaying the conversation in his mind.

"And where's your mom now?" Eli asked curiously.

Clare stiffened up and let out a deep breath. "That's something you don't need to know."

"Why not?"

"Well when you tell me why you're actually here, I'll tell you about that," Clare countered.

"I told you the truth," Clare said once Eli's face changed. "You tell me yours."

Eli stepped away from her, ripping his hand away as if it was on fire. "I don't know if I can."

Clare's face fell. "I knew it." She started to head towards the back door and the picture of someone walking out on him again and he caught her arm.

"My girlfriend was killed."

Eli braced himself for Clare's loud and surprised reaction but she had a calm look, all she wanted was for him to continue.

"Last summer, Julia and I got into a fight," Eli told Clare, his eyes shifting back and forth and trying to keep himself from bursting. He hadn't told anyone the story before. His parents knew about it, as did his best friend, but Eli never explained it aloud to anyone in his own words. "She accused me on cheating on her on this new girl in our neighborhood but it wasn't true at all. Julia had always been paranoid but apparently she had proof that I was cheating on her. We were yelling at each other and she stormed away on her bike and was struck by a drunk driver in the night."

"Oh my…" Clare gasped innocently.

"Then the girl that came between me and Julia, she started going after me," Eli continued. "She was manipulative and deceitful but she got me. She looked a lot like Julia, she made herself dress and look like her more, she transformed herself into Julia and I just missed her too much and I…I fell for it. Then she got me into pills."

Clare narrowed her eyes but didn't move away. Eli was terrified of scaring her away but Clare seemed to be taking it all in. Either she was good at hiding her true reactions or she was actually taking it all in. It may have been a mixture of both.

"It went on for months and months until I…"

Clare put her hand on Eli's arm comfortingly and looked him straight in the eye. "What did you do?"

"I attacked my best friend."

Clare put her hands over her mouth and stepped back from him. But she stayed. She stayed there. She wasn't running yet. "How did you attack him? Or her?"

"Adam," Eli clarified. "His name is Adam. And he, next to my parents, is the most important person in my life. I was so drugged up and he found me, alone in my house, and I got into doing pot too so that mixture of being medically drugged and high in the mind…you lose sight of yourself. Adam told me his side of the story because when I woke up eventually after, I didn't remember anything. He said he was yelling at me about Imogen, how she changed me completely, how I wouldn't have done any of this if Julia were here. I got angry and I punched him and I kicked him and I beat the shit out of him. But that wasn't all. That wasn't the truth. Adam was trying to protect me but I eventually remembered."

"What else could you have done?" Clare whispered, still in shock and still keeping distance.

"I brought a knife out on him," Eli confessed. "Imogen had given it to me, said I could use it whenever I needed it. It happened to be in my pocket and I put it against Adam's throat. He cried and pleaded and I had a crazed look in my eye. I think I would've done it if I hadn't passed out from an overdose."

Clare's breathing became erratic and she turned her head, walking out of the house. Eli ran after her and watched as Clare's footsteps made indents in the sand.

"What else happened?" Clare demanded. There was a full twenty feet away from them and over the loud waves, Clare was asking Eli to tell her the rest.

"I woke up in the hospital, Adam had told my parents what happened and I believed him like I said. I couldn't remember anything until a few months ago."

"And the girl?" Clare crossed her arms over her chest.

"I cut her out of my life for good," Eli answered. "Haven't talked to her since my overdose and she keeps trying to contact me but I don't answer. It was hard, getting over what I did to myself, but imagining my mom going through what she already did, thinking that I could've died, it was enough for me to stop. And I got some therapy. My therapist was shit but I think it helped."

"So what made you come here?"

There was wind now, strong wind that was pushing their clothes and hair in different directions. The sun was gone, now covered with thick clouds, and a storm seemed to be brewing through their entire discussion.

"Imogen…she was following me, stalking me, trying to get back with me, and I just…left."

Eli was hoping Clare wouldn't pry for more information but that just wouldn't be Clare would it?

"There's more you're not telling me," Clare stated.

Shit. "I started seeing her again a few months before I left," Eli admitted with difficulty. He didn't know what was causing him to be so honest. Maybe it was Clare's pleading look. He wanted to do anything for her and it had to start with the truth. "And no one knew. I just…"

"You loved her, didn't you?"

"No!" Eli yelled. The wind was really getting treacherous. "No, I didn't. I don't."

"Then why go back to her?" Clare asked. Little droplets of rain began dropping on their heads.

A storm was definitely coming.

"Because she was throwing herself at me…and I'm a guy!"

Thunder erupted in the sky and Eli watched Clare looking around, her facial expression now showing fear. She wrapped her arms around her body and she was trembling. So now the extra storm precaution was more than just to protect the house. Clare was afraid of storms.

"That's not it, is it?" Clare yelled.

When Eli said nothing, the rain poured harder as Clare approached him. Once she got to him, she was practically soaked already. "What else is there?" Clare demanded. "I told you the truth so you have to tell me the truth!"

"She was pregnant!"

Through the hazy rain, Eli saw Clare's eyes widen like never before.

"She got an abortion without telling me," Eli said. "I yelled at her, I called her so many things, and she was unapologetic. So I ran."

Suddenly a giant flash of lightning erupted too close to them, and the terrifying sound was enough to make both of them fall. Clare was in Eli's arms, clutching him in fear. They looked at each other briefly before making the run to the house. Eli was heading inside until he saw Clare taking the shutter protectors and started closing up the windows.

"Now? I think it's a little too late for that!"

Clare shot him a dirty look and only continued. Eli groaned and grabbed several of them and headed upstairs to board the windows in the upstairs balcony, which thankfully wrapped around the house so he'd be able to get as many windows as possible.

As he stood on the balcony, he looked at the storm getting worse. The direction of the rain was still soaking him, even if he was under cover. He attached the closers, sometimes with difficulty as he couldn't see. But finally he was finished and he made his way downstairs to find Clare. But she was nowhere on the bottom floor and he couldn't see her through any windows. The back door was swaying back and forth and he suddenly got a bad feelings.

"Clare!"

He ran out of the house and looked at every direction, trying to spot Clare's light hair, but the rain was making that impossible. He walked around the wrap around patio and approached the front of the house. He found his iTouch sitting on the railing, wet and probably won't work ever again and he'd lost his music collection but he didn't care.

Where was she?

He kept calling her name, looking around, pacing and waiting. Lightning and thunder seemed unrelenting and he knew Clare must be scared.

Finally he saw a figure coming in from the beach, and he ran to her and pulled her into the house.

"What were you thinking? I was freaking out here! How could you do—"

Clare grabbed his face and kissed him, passionately from the start, and backed him up against a wall and he heard something break.

She was pressed up against him hard and Eli kissed back earnestly, pulling her closer by the waist. Clare pulled away but their faces were only centimeters apart.

"You're still willing to take a risk with me…" Clare stated breathlessly. "Even if she hurt you."

"Clare, I was willing to take a risk with you the moment I saw you."

It was cliché, it was sappy and corny, but Eli couldn't help it. It was only the truth.

This time, Eli leaned down to kiss Clare but kissed her slowly. It was their slowest kiss but had the most meaning. Eli had told her everything, why he ran away, why he was damaged. She was the first to know everything. And just knowing her a little over a week, it seemed ridiculous that he'd open up to her so quickly.

But Clare was different. She understood. Because she was damaged as well.

Lightning struck and Clare pulled away from the kiss, scared and surprised. Even in the gray setting caused by the storm, Eli saw her cheeks blush.

"I don't like storms," Clare confessed, running her thumb over Eli's cheek.

The house started to rattle and the rain hitting the windows was creating an even more loud and harsh sound. Eli took Clare's hand and they walked through the house. As they made their way closer to the stairs, a large crash made them freeze.

Eli looked at Clare, pretty much telling her to stay, and he walked toward the living room and saw that wood had flown in through a window, shattering the glass and breaking the closer. The rain was coming in through the window and the sound of the storm was increased.

"Is there a basement here?" Eli asked once he came back to her.

Clare nodded and she took Eli to the door. He didn't hesitate to go downstairs and bring Clare with him. It was their safest place to be in through this large storm.

It was the usual basement, holding all of the equipment which made the house run, but as Eli inspected it, he saw water leaking through a corner. It was only drips of water but any was hazardous around all of the main machines.

Eli heard another crash upstairs and looked to Clare, now sitting in a fetal position on a raggedy old couch. He sat in front of her and took her hand and beckoned for her to come into his arms. She smiled weakly and did so, putting herself in his lap sideways and resting her head on his shoulder.

He felt her body becoming less tense and felt Clare's shallow breathing, signaling she had fallen asleep. He kissed the top of her head and pulled her in closer.

"It scares me how fast I fell for you."

Eli knew she didn't hear it but in his heart, he knew that she knew.