Summary: Alice and Edward comeback expecting everything to be the same but why is Bella so angry with Alice? Why does Alice care so much? Will Edward's true self show when he finds out the truth? AU Fem-Slash Bellice Early New Moon.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything familiar but I do own four pairs of raggedy old converse.
Rated: M for future Fem-Slash loving.
Title: Can't Go Back
BPOV
We walked to the bench in front of the first period class. After sitting there for a few minutes as Alice stared at me I decided to ask the question that has been on my mind since yesterday's incident.
"Alice...What do you see in me?"
She answered hesitantly.
"Everything. I love everything about you, your smile, laugh, your eyes, even your clumsiness. Everything that makes you who you are . . . even what you'd consider a flaw. Everything."
I blushed at her endearing words.
Edward always told me how beautiful I was but not like that. After my blush went away I gazed at Alice and it was like never saw her before. Everything about her dazzled me: her perfectly disarrayed hair, her liquid gold eyes with specks of green no one else would notice unless you had stared directly into them, her rosy lips that formed the most elegant smile, the way there was a slight dimple on her left cheek when she smiled and millions of things beyond what I had listed.
I went scarlet when I saw the raw longing in her sparkling eyes but the gravity was ruined when Mike stalked over.
"Hey Bella."
Alice instantly went ridged beside me so I took her hand in mine to keep her calm and looked at Mike with irritation.
"Hi Mike."
After giving me a once over, much to the dismay of a quietly growling Alice, he smiled hopefully.
"Do you want to hang with me and Jessica this weekend?
"I exhaled and managed not to tell him off.
"I'll think about it."
He sauntered away clearly excited while Alice scowled at his retreating figure.
"He's not inviting Jessica."
I almost laughed at her dejected voice when I heard Alice mumbling about him trying to trick her mate.
"Alice, do you wanna go shopping?"
She stopped her murmured rant and beamed.
"You're asking me to go shopping?"
I couldn't bring myself to backpedal even if I knew it would probably be torturous for me.
"Yeah, I want to spend time with my bestfriend and you like shopping. I know you've been having a tough time."
She hugged me and squealed.
"Jasper never even offered to go shopping with me."
I chuckled weakly to placate her but was thinking about her comparison of me to Jasper.
The bell rang so we headed to class. started a lecture on the major philosophers. I was extremely uninterested in the lesson so I peered at Alice who was writing her notes. Her handwriting was flawless like a font on a computer. I was some how completely entertained by Alice and was caught off guard when the bell finally rang.
Before I could reach my stuff Alice took it and walked me to my next class without a word. I guess this is how life was now because she never walked me to my next class before. Jasper used to meet us and escort her to hers.
I shuffled into class thankful that we were having study hall and glared at the empty chair beside me.
When I finished my work I made a mental list of everything I liked and disliked about Edward. If I would've made this mental list last year there would've been hundreds of things I liked but now the only thing I liked was that he introduced me to Alice.
After sitting there doing nothing for a few minutes Angela finished her work and sat next to me for the first time in a long time. She tapped her pencil on the desk for a few minutes and didn't make eye contact.
"The Cullen's are back so I figured you'd be better. I want to be your friend."
I felt guilty. "I'm sorry for pushing you away."
We chatted for a few minutes and the bell rang so I we headed to the cafeteria but on the way I noticed some guy talking to Alice.
As we walked nearer I heard part of the conversation.
"So I see you're not with Jasper. Would you like to go out with me?"
Alice looked like she was trying to hold back a laugh.
"Sorry but no."
He frowned and his ego was obviously wounded.
"What? Is no one here good enough for you?"
I completely forgot about Angela and marched over.
"She won't go out with you because she's min- my bestfriend and she's busy."
I pulled her away before he could respond.
She smiled playfully.
"I'm yours?"
I regretted my slip up.
"No I just messed up my sentence."
She smirked mockingly.
"I heard you clearly."
I quickly got irritated because she wouldn't let it go.
"No you didn't. I will never be that way and I'll never be yours."
My words completely wiped her smile away and I felt so heartless.
"I'm sorry Alice. I shouldn't have said that."
She shook her head bitterly.
"No you're right Bella. I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up. Why would you want me?"
There were a whole bunch of reasons why I would want her but she abandoned me and I wasn't that way.
"I'm still very sorry. Can me and you sit alone?"
She nodded and we found a bench outside the cafeteria instead of the Cullen table. She still looked low spirited from my words. I was determined to cheer her up
."So . . . I haven't worn a dress in forever . . ."
Her eyes brightened and she grinned.
"And?"
Her excitement was almost enough to make me regret my decision. Almost.
"And . . . maybe you can dress me up for prom. I don't really want to go but I know as soon as my friends forgive me for pushing them away they'll make me go."
The pain in Alice's eyes was completely gone.
"We can go this weekend, Saturday for shopping and Sunday if you still wanna hang out. We can do something you like."
I smiled.
"Way to compromise pixie."
Her smile got a hell of a lot adorabler and then she pouted.
"Pixie?"
I hesitated for a second.
"Yeah it's a nickname."
She looked at me suspiciously.
"You're calling me short."
I knew she didn't like people joking about her height even though she pretended to take it lightly.
"No pixies are cute."
She smiled and I regretted my word choice.
She thinks I called her cute.
Well didn't I?
No, it was an obvious cover up for insulting her height.
But she is cute.
NO SHE'S NOT!
"Are you okay Bella?"
She put her hand on my lap and I flinched.
"Yeah."
The bell rang so she lead me to my next class which I had with Jasper.
Shit.
I sat in the back and waited for the inevitable meeting. I felt like I would hurl but a second later I felt a calming wave go over me. I glanced to my side nervously and saw Jasper.
"Hello Bella. I'm not mad at you. Love chooses what it wants. Alice is not in control of her emotions. You're just meant to be together and I've accepted it."
I stared at him confused.
"I don't feel the same way."
He shook his head sadly.
"Your emotions can't lie. I feel the truth even if you are unaware."
What does he mean? I tried to focus on the class work but couldn't so I just doodled and waited for the bell. And almost exactly after the bell rang Alice was waiting by the door for me looking like everything was normal. I hope it doesn't get awkward.
"Hey Alice."
She smiled adorably.
"Hey Bella. Hi Jazz."
He smiled but I knew it was forced.
"Hey Al, I'll be- nevermind. You don't need to know about my whereabouts anymore."
Without waiting for a response he walked off. Alice frowned and the lights in her eyes were dim.
"Uh Alice do you want to sleepover? We are already hanging out."
She smiled weakly and nodded.
"I'll meet you at your place in a hour."
She walked me to my car and before she could turn around I hugged her. She smelt like winter and vanilla. I wish my pillow smelt like her then I'd never have a nightmare. She left looking reluctant and I drove home.
I stumbled up to my room and noticed something was off. I inspected my room and saw that my scrapbook was open on the drawer next to my bed. It was opened to a picture of me and Edward.
There was a letter:
My dearest Isabella. I've decided that since you're human and that emotional problems seem to last longer than I've expected that I would give you a lot of space. I promise I'll be back...even if you don't think you want me to because you're mine and I know what's best. I'll check up on you time to time. I haven't decided if I'm going to kill Alice but if you don't struggle I'll be nice Forever yours,Edward
I started hyperventilating and my sense of parinoia increased. I sat on my bed and rocked back and forth to calm down. As soon as I was completely calm my whole body went ridged when I heard someone at my window.
"Why are you crying?"
I was relieved to hear Alice's voice. I'm crying? I wiped my face and felt the wetness of my tears.
She walked up to me and immediately her eyes went dark.
"Edward was here? What did he do to you?"
I handed her the letter and she read it in a second.
"Don't worry Bella I won't let him get you back."
I looked at her like she was crazy.
"Don't you understand? He might kill you!"
She held me in her cold toned arms.
"I know what's coming Bella. Please don't worry."
How could I not worry?He might hurt my Alice. My Alice?
I again was having trouble breathing. Alice rubbed my back.
"Sshhhh my Bella it will be okay."
The way she said my Bella made me feel so safe, like she lived to protect me. Unlike Edward's possesive tone. I stared into her peaceful eyes and soon dozed off.
I woke up laying down in Alice's arms. Even though her skin was hard it still had that natural femine softness. I peered up at her which caused her to make a move to get up. I held on to her tighter.
"Sorry Bella you just wouldn't let go when I tried to lay you down."
I snuggled into her and inhaled her scent."
It's okay, you're comfy."
She laughed and wrapped her arms around my waist.
"Bella I lo-. . . sorry."
When she almost said I love you my heart stopped.
"You can say it, just please don't be hurt when I don't say it back."
She nodded with a blank expression.
"I don't want to put a strain on our friendship."
Was there a downside to her treating me like I was hers. It was probably wrong to lead her on but vampire feelings didn't change. So it was okay. Right?
"Alice you can treat me like I'm yours. Nothing you do can bother me."
She nodded but was clearly confused. I yawned obviously still tired. I laid my head was rested on Alice's shoulder. As I was drifting to sleep I heard Alice whisper.
"Goodnight my Bella."
I smiled.
"Goodnight my pixie."
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Yes another 2 in 1 day update. I think that deserves more awesome reviews. Was this chapter enjoyable and realistic? What can I improve? What did you like or didn't like?