Disclaimer: look chapter one

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Chapter 5:

1. November – 12. December

Fawkes was far from being amused.

It had been nearly twenty days since the curse had been broken.

Twenty days! Almost three weeks! Any other person in his position might have been happy to be back in his human form after 263 years in prison.

Well, he was. Who wouldn't be after that amount of time in the form of a bird? A beautiful, rare and powerful bird, but an animal none the less.

There had been times when he had enjoyed being a Phoenix. It was hard to believe but it was the truth. After the first shock, anger and the spiteful hate was gone and he had to see reason that he would be stuck in his bird form, he had tried to make peace.

At least with himself.

Fawkes wasn't sure how long it had taken him after that, but one day when he had opened his eyes, he was suddenly able to notice the beauty around him. He had spread his wings and and glided through the bright blue sky till he was too tired to continue. But his heart had beat wildly every time he remembered the amazing, carefree flight.

From that day forward he had been happier. Somehow more free and open to realise that his life wasn't over. Just different.

That was also around the time, he had met an intelligent, kind and powerful wizard by the impressive name of Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore -and chose to stay with him.

To say that this man hadn't changed his life somewhat as drastically as the curse itself wouldn't be only an understatement it would be a round lie. But other than the curse he had changed his life for the better.

But all that didn't mean he wanted to stay a phoenix forever. Not if there was a way to prevent it -and there was. It had cost him a lifetime to find out that there was a cure. A small chance to become what he once had been. A breathing human being.

263 years were a long time but in the end he had found her: Hermione Granger. Smartest witch of her age and his candle in the night. The one person who possessed the power to free him.

And freed him she had!

Like the fairy tale princess she had been in the dreams he had sent her, she stood before him. And instead of bursting into flames and be reborn as a phoenix, like so many times before, this time as the flames gave him free, he was actually himself again.

Nathaniel E. Fawkes, son of Oberon E. Fawkes. Heir to the Fawkes name, fortune, position and every thing else. Not to forget the reputation.

So three weeks after he had re-entered the world of the humans, he should be giddy with happiness and well he was...and wasn't.

The reason for his misery was the same reason he felt happy at all. A little contradictory -granted, but that was how it was.

Everything was centring around Hermione.

Things started with her and things ended with her. If he liked it or not she was practically the axis of his world and without her he would come to an uncomfortable still stand.

He couldn't let that happen, not if his world had just started to spin again.

Gritting her teeth together Hermione quickened her steps as she walked through the hallways. She tried to ignore the whispers from the other students, as well as she could but it was getting harder. Ever since that incident in the Great Hall during the Halloween Ball, she had been the focus of the gossip mile of Hogwarts.

She hated it. Even before that, she had to bear the fact that a lot of people seemed to think they had the right to speculate about her -with being a war heroine, the cleverest witch of her age and all that crap. But now it was even worse than in her forth year after Victor Krum had asked her to be his date for the Yule ball.

This time even the teachers glanced at her with curious eyes. There were all sorts of theories how she had done it and obviously there was not a single soul who didn't believe it to be her work that Fawkes was no longer a phoenix.

Of course the former magical bird was the first one to admit that it was her doing. Now she was Hermione Granger -smartest witch of her age, war heroine and ancient curse breaker!

For the first time in her life, she wished she could skip classes and hide in her room but of course with the upcoming exams she couldn't allow herself such cowardliness. So she did the next best thing. She avoided crowded places, ate her meals in the silence of her room and only visited the library to check out new books.

That was the hardest part of it. Hermione loved the library of Hogwarts and especially now, when she wanted to research about the curse and her part in breaking it she missed it. But she had no other choice if she wanted to avoid nosy questions. And more than that, she wanted to avoid him. He and his endless pulp of fan girls who giggled and flirted with him the whole time.

So okay -he looked good.

Scratch that, Hermione, she rebuked herself. He looked bloody amazing. Human Fawkes was breathtaking to look at and even her dream faded in comparison to the real thing. Tall, broad shouldered, with muscles in the right places and the most amazing eyes ever.

A dark an mysterious shade of green she had never seen before.

Hermione sighed inwardly.

Ever since the ball he never missed a change to talk with her, compliment her and flirt with her which only fuelled the gossip and jealously of the other witches.

As if he was really interested in her, she snorted. It was quite obvious that he was convinced to be in her debt for freeing him. But instead of being happy, all Hermione could feel was sadness. She didn't want him to be nice to her because he felt under constraint by his honour or something like that. She wanted the things to be like in her dreams, but they had left her. In their place once again was the all consuming darkness and pain Bellatrix LeStrange had caused her.

She banned all thoughts of the crazy witch out of her mind. It was bad enough that she spent her nights with memories of her, she had no right to consume her day time. Instead she thought of the first time she had talked to Fawkes and smiled a little.

After she had woken up from the unconsciousness he had been there. He sat next to her on the hospital bed and smiled at her so brightly that she had felt her heart flutter in excitement.

"Hello, my fairy princess."

She blinked and was tempted to pinch herself, to make sure this wasn't a dream.

"No, dream," he assured her as if he had read her mind. "I'm real, this time. All thanks to you."

"The dreams...you...Phoenix..." Hermione stuttered less eloquent but he only smiled at her. "I don't understand!"

"No? I think you do -after all you have seen what magic can do is it so hard to imagine that what happened is true?"

That had been her problem. "What exactly happened?"

"I've been cursed a long time ago, princess," he smiled sadly but something in his eyes wasn't right. She couldn't say what it was -there were so many emotions reflected in them that she couldn't make out all of them.

"I have spent the last 263 imprisoned in the body of a Phoenix. And you are the one, who obviously broke the curse."

"How? How is that possible? Why me?"

"You are something special, princess, that's you can't imagine how happy I'm that I found you -or should I say that you found me?"

With that he took her hand, which was covered in one of his own, and kissed her knuckles. It was such an old and intimate gesture that she could feel her cheeks heating up. His eyes smiled cheekily down at her and she shifted uncomfortably in her bed, suddenly realising that she was wearing nothing but a thin hospital grown.

After nearly three hundred years in an inhuman body she would also be happy to be herself again. It wasn't hard to understand why he felt grateful, but she really wished he would stop making her feel...special.

At first she hadn't mind. Who in their right mind would? But some well placed spiteful words from Lavender had set things right.

Smiling like a fool she watched Fawkes walk away. It had been nine days since Halloween and the newly freed man was always somewhere around her. Hermione enjoyed his company immensely. He was not only nice to look at but also quite intelligent and witty. Apart from Draco there weren't so many people around her these days who could hold a conversation with her that easily and the latter was spending more and more time with Luna.

Hermione was happy for him, but although it had been only a week she suddenly noticed how much she had come to enjoy being friends with Draco. So Fawkes also helped her over her loneliness.

Ignoring the endless whispers and pointed fingers around her she was about to turn around and walk into the classroom when Lavenders voice pierced through the air.

"You are such a fool, Hermione!" she snorted. "Do you really believe he is interested in you? Have you ever looked into a mirror?" Her hateful words didn't hurt so much any longer. They came from Lavender after all. "He's taking pity on you because he feels he is in your debt. Why else would a man like him even look at you, when he can have anyone he wants?"

That hurt, but not as much as her next words. "Oh, you're really disenchanted. Where do you think he spends his time when he is not with you. Or should I say, with whom does he spend his time?After three centuries a man really needs more than an inexperienced little bookworm." And with a last haughtily laugh she was gone. Leaving a shell shocked Hermione behind.

She wanted to push Lavenders words aside as spiteful lies, which were only spoken to hurt her but Hermione was no fool. As cruel as the blond girl had turned out to be, somewhere in the depth the curly haired witch knew she was right. And sure enough, after that she had looked a little deeper and more carefully around.

The way he smiled at other witches, made them giggle and put that dreamy look in their eyes, she knew she must have too, when she spoke with him. She was disenchanted and with a painful sob she had ripped her rose-coloured glasses away.

Gone was the fairytale prince form her dream and in his place was a nice and good looking man who only spend time with her because he was thankful. Not because he liked her and wanted to know her better.

In a twisted way she probably should thank Lavender for setting things straight but she would rip out her own tongue before she would say something nice to the blond woman. Life at Hogwarts was far from being a dream these days -even worse than in her first year and were it not for Luna and Draco Hermione would be a weeping mess.

But Luna and her Dragon where just about to discover whatever attraction was between them and Hermione didn't want to be in their way. So apart from the times they spent working on their charity project and a meal now and then she left them alone.

Today was Friday and classes where over. But it was also only a few days after the last full moon and she knew that Remus was still feeling a little weak. Her plan was to spent their day with him and his son and look a little after them. Remus tended to neglect himself and she would make sure that he ate enough and rested while she would spent some time with Teddy.

"Hermione!"

There was the one voice she had hoped to avoid and she had almost reached Remus door. Damn. For a moment she played with the thought to just continue to walk and play deaf but she knew she wouldn't get far with it. So she stopped, put a smile on her face and turned around.

"Nathaniel, how are you?" Even though he was still Fawkes in her thoughts, she found it quite rude to call him that out loud.

"Splendid!" He smiled and her traitorous heart forgot to beat for a second. "I wondered if you would like to accompany me tomorrow? We could spend the day in Hogsmeade and have butter beer together."

Why was he doing that to her? There was no need to be nice to her.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Nathaniel, but I promised Teddy to go with him."

Yes, that was a good argument.

"Teddy?" His sharp voice startled her for a moment and he must have noticed, because the fervent glim in his eyes dimmed instantly.

"Uhm...yes. Ted Lupin," she explained a little unsure. "You know, Professor Lupins son." That caused a drastic change in him. From one second to the other he relaxed and sent her a warm smile once again.

"Oh, the one you told me about?" After her confirming nod he continued. "Well, why don't we take him with us? I'm sure he is much more charming company than me, but I will do my very best to keep up with him." His green eyes contained so much hope that Hermione barely dared to breathe. Could it be that Lavender was maybe wrong after all? That she was more than a charity project for him and he wanted to spend time with her?

"Okay," she heard herself say and was rewarded with a megawatt smile that caused her to blush brightly.

"Excellent! Should I pick you up at nine from your common room? Or would it suit you better to meet with me in the great hall?"

"Uh...would the great hall be okay with you? I' have to pick up Teddy before."

"No problem." He was still smiling and Hermione felt less and less worried about her decision to spend the day with him tomorrow. She had still so many questions about the curse he was under and how it was to live as a phoenix for such a long time. Or how life in the wizard world had been when he had been a human. The lines of questions in her mind was endless, and of course there was the fact that spending time with Fawkes was always so flawless. He made her feel cherished and it was easy then to forget about the spiteful words Lavender threw at her.

But ten minutes later when she was knocking on Remus door her worries were back. Was it really the right decision to go with him?

"Is there something you want to talk about? About a former Phoenix maybe?"

From the startled look Hermione gave him, Remus could tell that she wasn't expecting that question, but the way she was nipping at her bottom lip told him that there was something.

"What do you mean?" she asked and haltered in her attempt to clean the dishes, much to the horror of the house elves.

"I mean, that first you spend most of your time with Nathaniel Fawkes and now you seem to avoid him as much as a person possibly could." Something was off, he was sure of it but he couldn't figure out what. It was very clear that the former bird was very fond of Hermione. The fact that she had lift his curse was probably part of his fondness, but Remus could see that there was more to it.

He sought her company with a desperation that was nearly frantic and had him frowning now and then. But Fawkes had made her laugh and treated her with the uttermost respect and the old werewolf was thankful for it.

Astonishingly the young Malfoy made a good job, too since the two of them started to work on a project together, but not quite in the same way as Fawkes. Probably because Draco wasn't interested in Hermione in more than a friendly way, while no one could deny Nathaniel's interest in Hermione. In Remus eyes it was about time that someone saw Hermione as what she really was. A kind, intelligent and beautiful person. Maybe too intelligent and witty for most boys her age to appreciate what they would have in a woman like her.

Remus knew how lonely she really was, he witnessed it since the end of the war.

Her ambition to prove her worth in the wizard community and her quenchless thirst for knowledge had always separated her from the other students but her friendship with Harry and Ron had always been her anchor and they meant the world to her. Nobody knew better than him how hard it was to stick out and how much it meant to have good friends who stood by your side. And how hard it was to loose them. In a certain way, to loose a good friend through death wasn't as bad as to loose him the way Hermione lost Ron. At least Remus knew that James and Sirius were with him till the last breath.

Ron had simply changed and not for the better. Harry would come around with time, he was sure but Remus couldn't help and feel gutted about the way he treated his best fiend. Hermione had stuck to him no matter what everyone else thought and told behind his back. She had always put his well-being before her own and now when she really needed him he was too occupied with himself to see her misery. Neither the way her nightmares tormented her nor how lonely she was.

"I don't avoid him," Hermione denied his reproach. "In fact I will go with him to Hogsmeade tomorrow."

"Oh really?" he frowned. "I thought you wanted to take Teddy tomorrow?"

"Uh..um...yes, well I told him that I would spent time with Teddy tomorrow and he still wanted to go with me to Hogsmeade." She was biting her lower lip again and the frown on his forehead deepened.

"You want to take a toddler with you on a date?"

"It's no date!" she protested. "We are just...just...He's just grateful that I was able to lift the curse. I'm pretty sure he thinks himself in my debt so he tries to be nice to me. No big deal."

He could see that she didn't believe in her own words. No big deal his ass.

"Is it so hard to believe that he likes you and asked you simply because he wants to go with you?" Remus asked softly and he would have laughed at the disbelieving look in her eyes, hadn't it been so sad that she had no self-confidence at all, when it came to her person.

"Hermione, you are a kind, intelligent and beautiful young woman who in their right mind wouldn't want to go out with you? I'm sure that it has nothing to do with gratefulness."

The look in her eyes was getting uncertain, like the rest of her. She was still biting her lip and twiddling with the end of her sleeves. "You really think so?"

The tone of her voice hurt his heart. What had they done to that marvellous woman in front of him, that she couldn't see her own worth?

"Lavender said that he could have anyone he wanted and that he's only nice to me because of what I did and that he is taking pity on me," she whispered miserably.

Ah, so the stupid blonde was the cause behind this.

"I didn't believe her at first for obvious reasons," Hermione snorted and he could only grin at that. "But then, well she's right. Nearly every girl in this school is going crazy over him and...and...why would he want to spend time with me when he could spend it with them?"

"But he asked you out not one of the others, has he not?"

"Out of pity!"

"Hermione," sighing he sat down beside her and took her hands in his. "I've got no idea why you can't see it but you are a beautiful person. Inside and out and you should have a little more faith in yourself. I'm sure whatever Fawkes reasons are to ask you out it has nothing to do with pity or a mistaken sense of guilt."

Torn between her doubts and her wish to believe him Hermione continued to torment her bottom lip. "Really?"

"Really, Hermione. I tell you something. Why don't you leave Teddy in my care tomorrow and enjoy your day? Just give him a chance. Who knows maybe you will be surprised."

It was clear to see that she was still struggling with herself but finally he heard her sigh and he knew that he had won this argument.

"Fine I...I will," she finally agreed and he could only hope that Nathaniel Fawkes possessed enough intelligence to realise what a treasure Hermione Granger really was. Would things be different or he twenty years younger he would know what he would do. But things were like they were and there was nothing that could change who he was and what he had been through.

For him it was too late but Hermione's life had just begun and he wished it to be a happy and fulfilling one with someone at her side who worshipped her the way she deserved.

Hermione stared at him in awe.

"What?" Fawkes asked amused and she could only shake her head.

"It's just nice to know that there are men who don't talk about Quidditch all the time and likewise seem to understand what I'm talking about."

"You said that before."

"Well, it's true," she confirmed and smiled. Until now she hadn't regret her decision to give it a try like Remus had suggested. Nathaniel had appeared pleasantly surprised, when she had told him that they would spend their day without Teddy and promised her to not let her down. And he hadn't. Charming like ever he offered her his arm to guided her to Hogsmeade while they talked about Hogwarts and how it had changed since he had been a student here. That had been nearly three-hundred years ago. Quite a while even in the wizarding world.

There were a lot of things the books didn't mention and Hermione was all to eager to hear more about his time and life.

She was more than a little surprised to hear that he had been a Slytherin but the longer she thought about it the more it fitted him. He was intelligent, sharp-witted and cunning, all attributes which were typical for Slytherin. Not to forget he was a Pureblood and much too complex to be sorted into Ravenclaw. Oddly enough she didn't mind. After the time she had spent with Draco she had come to realise that Slytherin produced some of the most interesting talking partners. Fawkes was no difference. He could easily hold a conversation about every topic they had talked about so far and underlined it with facts and well placed arguments.

It had been one of the reasons she had enjoyed his company in the first place after the curse had been broken. Of course his good looks didn't hurt either but on the other hand they had been the cause of her doubts as much as his charming personality that could certainly win over almost every witch.

Their conversation floated easily and Hermione was shocked to realise how much time had passed, when he asked her if she would mind some food and a warm butter beer.

He helped her out of her coat, put out her chair and asked her what she would like before he ordered for the two of them. His manners were a pleasantly alternation to Harry's and Ron's attitude. And he didn't disappoint her in the following hour. Their talk shifted to the war and her role in it without getting to deep into the subject. Like he wasn't too keen to talk about the circumstances of his curse she didn't like to discuss what happened to her during her time in Malfoy manor or the final battle. Their topic shifted quickly to a more harmless one.

"What do you want to do when you're finished with your NEWTS?" he asked.

Well, maybe the change of topic wasn't as good as she thought.

Sighing she shrugged her shoulders and leant back in her chair. "I always wanted to work as a healer or at a Ministry which takes charges of the rights of people or creatures who are not able to help themselves. I always wanted to make a change, you know help others and make a difference."

"What changed?"

"Me," she admitted frustrated. "The war changed a lot of things. Don't get me wrong I would still like to help people but after all that happened I'm not sure if I want to work for the Ministry. Deep down they don't want to change and I suppose...well I think I could achieve more without them." Ever since her fifth year her opinion about the Ministry had changed drastically and although they were trying to start anew, Hermione knew it would not be enough in the end.

Or maybe she had just lost her silly childhood illusion of revolutionising the system from the inside. The wizard world was an archaic system that was working far more slowly than the muggle world. Dramatical changes were rare and dreaded.

"And for working as a healer," she continued. "I've seen enough sorrow and death for two lives, I'm not sure if I would be strong enough to work in this field."

As she looked at him, she noticed that he watched her with a thoughtful expression, as if he was trying to figure something out. Finally his usual smile returned but his eyes were sincerely as he leant forward and took one of her hands in his. His hand was pleasantly warm and and made it truly hard to concentrate on his next words.

"Although I don't know you as good as I wish I'm quite sure that isn't true. From all what I've seen and heard till today you're on of the strongest persons there are."

She actually blushed at his compliment and hurriedly lowered her head.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"Act as if you don't deserve a compliment."

That only caused to deepen the blush. "Uhm...uh...it's not..." Hermione stuttered and cringed inwardly at her stupid behaviour. "I guess I'm just not used to it." Least of all from someone as Nathaniel Fawkes she thought.

"Well, that's a shame!" he argued and actually looked angry about it. "You're a beautiful, intelligent and kind woman. Someone like you should be showered in compliments. It seems that some things changed since I was a human but obviously not for the better."

By now her face was so hot that she feared to burn on the spot. She must look ridiculous but all Nathaniel did was taking her hand to his mouth and brush a kiss to her knuckles.

"Don't worry, princess, I intent to compliment you every chance I get."

"Why do you always call me that?" Curiosity finally got over her embarrassment and she watched him closely as she asked him.

"Cause you are my princess. My fairy princess." Something stuck her odd with his answer but she supposed it was just her self-insecurity about the nickname he used on her ever since she had awoken out of her unconsciousness. Although she wouldn't admit it, she secretly loved the name because it reminded her of her dreams.

Her beautiful dream. These days all that she was called in her dreams was filthy mudblood. Hermione shuddered simply by thinking about it and pushed it quickly to the side. Her day was too nice to destroy it by a hurtful memory.

But it didn't take long for Hermione to understand that it didn't need her dream to destroy that. They had just left the little pub and lingered from one shop to the other when a bunch of seventh year witches approached them.

"Nathan," gushed one of them. A pretty blonde with large blue eyes and much to snug fitting clothes in Hermione's eyes. The familiarity in which the witch spoke to Fawkes didn't relish her in the slightest and she was even less happy about the smile on his face as he looked at her.

"How are you? We missed you terrible this afternoon," a tall redhead pouted sweetly and was backed up from the other three witches which all looked at him as if he was candy on two legs.

All Slytherins she presumed from her style and attitude. The haughty looks and sneers in her direction only fuelled her guess.

"Oh, I'm sorry ladies but I told you that I wouldn't make it," Fawkes apologised charmingly.

"Maybe you can make it up to us?"

"I live to serve," he laughed warmly but it didn't hold the same effect on her like before.

Hermione suddenly wished nothing more than to be somewhere else. The four beautiful woman had successfully managed to surround Fawkes and exclude her from their circle. But worst of all was that Nathaniel didn't even seem to notice. Still stunned from the sudden change of events she watched him laugh and flirt with the girls with a facility that bothered her. Blinking a few times didn't help, the image before her didn't change. Her stupor however vanished quickly.

How could she have been so stupid? Lavender had been right all a long she was nothing to him but an annoying duty. In his presence she always felt so special and cherished that her common sense seemed to leave her as quickly as her dignity.

But not any more she swore to herself. With a last look on the laughing and flirting group she turned around and left. Ignoring the hurtful stab she felt inside she banned all tears out of her eyes. She wouldn't allow him or one of this stupid hussies to make her cry. Sometimes Hermione had a feeling that she had cried far more since the war ended than in the years before and she asked herself if she had more reason to do so or if she simply allowed her defensive walls to weaken too much? But deep down inside she knew that it was none of it. The simple truth was that it had never been her friends before that made her so miserable or people she wished to become more than that she thought sadly and looked over her shoulder. Only to witness how Fawkes smiled brightly at the witches without noticing her absence.

Her heart ached but she ignored it.

High above in his favourite tower of Hogwarts the figure of professor Dumbledore watched a deeply hurt Hermione walk back to the castle. He had seen her leaving it earlier today on the arm of his good old friend and knew all too clearly what must have happened.

Maybe he was old but surely not dim-witted.

"Oh, Fawkes my friend," he sighed. "Haven't three-hundred years taught you nothing?"

TBC

A/N: So here is your update.

As I said before it will take some time for these two and really where would be the fun if it would be easy? And let's not forget Nathaniel might have spend some time as a bird...but deep down he is and was a man and they operate after a special scheme...and lets face it ladies...sometimes this scheme is odd!

I hope you like it so far and let me hear your thoughts...I will listen^^

xxxShanxxx

preciousteddybear, cjewellm, timerose: Thank you^^

Molly Goode: Well, Ron isn't one of my favourite characters so there is little hope for him...^^

Mistress Samantha: Yes there are lot of Dramiones out there and I can understand why. They have the potential to be more. But I think they could be really good friends if they were given the chance. Draco needs someone who would stand by his side and Hermione needs someone with a little more wit and brain who can live through her temper. ^^

soubifan700: yes...Luna and Draco...somehow I find them fitting.^^ And a coockie for your review :-)

Hypnotized Angle: I never give up. I can't promise that it will be an update every week but I will definately finish this story.