Authors Note: I apologize for the lack of Mal in the last chapter, because Mal's angst is way more important than Jayne being cool in a spaceship, and you can totally tell me if you want more Mal or more Jayne because this is about everyone not just Mal.
Chapter Five – Tell Them I'm Coming Back Because I'm Tired of Running Away
Mal tried to use the computer to find out where Mal was. First he tried to use spacegoogle by searching "Impounded Ship Serenity". But that didn't work. They did get a helpful ad for a product that would make somebody's feet smell like space ships, though.
Next, he decided to ask. So he typed "Where is my ship it is named Serenity and I think it was impounded by the Alliance?" into Spaceyahoo!answers.
They decided to order tea and coffee while they waited for someone to response.
Eventually, someone responded! And the computer caught on fire in excitement when it told them, but that was okay because River put it out again since she is not only a girl but also a body of water.
Ryan looked at the first response and gasped. "MAL YOUR SHIP IS IN THIS POOR USER'S MOTHER! HOW DID IT GET INSIDE OF HER?"
River grabbed the mouse and scrolled down. "That's just internet lies. Serenity isn't a lesbian except for sometimes. And I don't think she is for that guy's mom, though."
Eventually they found one with a legitimate address because it had been posted by a person working for the Alliance who liked to help people as much as he could. So they went to the address, and Serenity was there!
Jayne looked out of a window and waved at them, while shooting at all the people who looked concerned about being shot at. Mal told them to go away, but they didn't. So then Ryan tried to, and since Ryan looked more authoritative, they decided they would go ask a superior whether they should actually leave, so they left, but only temporary.
Mal and River hurried in, and Jayne said "You owe me some bullets."
Ryan followed them, but since he didn't have any bullets either, Jayne got mad and shot at him. He missed killing Ryan, but Ryan got injured in his leg. "OH NO, I AM INJURED, MAL!"
Mal was concerned, and River started flailing around on the ground because she could feel his pain empathetically.
Mal was ready to collapse in sorrow at this misfortune that had occurred to his friend, but he came up with an idea before he did. "I know what we need- a doctor!"
River stopped flailing long enough to say "MY BROTHER is a doctor! Can we get Simon! He's still in jail!"
Mal agreed that that would be a good idea. "But he is on another planet!"
Even though he was in pain, Ryan was being rational. "I DON'T WANT TO MAKE THIS A VIDEO GAME WITH LOTS OF ANNOYING QUESTS TO DO SIMPLE ACTIONS, BUT THERE IS NO KEYS TO THE SHIP IN HERE, THEY ARE GONE, AND WE NEED TO GET THEM, ALSO THE PEOPLE WE SCARED AWAY ARE BACK WITH MORE GUNS."
Mal decided that he could distract them, somehow.
-end chapter five!
Find out how he distracts them, next chapter!