Okay! Short chappie, thank you reviewers, you know who you are, sorry not to mention you, but I'm running low on time.
I fence saber, btw.
Disclaimer! Yeah…
Chapter 11! Skit Night Pt. 1
xXxPhoebe's POVxXx
"Got any fours?"
"Go fish. Got any threes?"
"Go fish. Do you have any fours now?"
"Nope. Keep on fishing!"
Italy rolled her eyes and reached for another card. Neither of my ladies had given up a card since the beginning of the game. Those cheaters.
"Alright, ladies," I said from my position on Zetsu's lap. "How about you try something different. You've almost used up the entire pile."
The two picked up all of the cards. It was going to be a long couple of days. There was a blizzard outside and almost everyone in the Akatsuki was trapped in the base. The worst part was that the power had "gone out," but I blame that cheap bastard Kakuzu. At least we had some blankets.
Well, the ones on the beds.
And candles. Those were important, I guess.
"Danna, I'm cold, un!" Deidara whined from across the room. He was the only one left without a blanket since he was a rookie. Apparently the ladies first rule applied to getting blankets during blackouts in the middle of winter.
Italy claimed Deidara's.
"Shut up, brat!" Sasori snarled.
"But I'm cold! Kakuzu-san!" Yes, Kakuzu had taken his last partner's blanket with the excuse of being old.
"You can share with me, Deidara," Itachi offered.
If looks could kill…
Colette sighed, "All of your whining made me bored."
"We should figure out something to do," mused Italy.
"No, no," said Colette. "we should just sit here wallowing in our boredom."
"Sounds like a plan," Italy said.
"You know, since we can't sacrifice anyone."
Italy flickered her eyes around, "Or could we."
"…" Everyone gave Italy a wary look, well except for Itachi and Sasori and Kakuzu and Zetsu and me. Well, pretty much only Deidara and Kisame did.
"No," Colette answered. We sat in silence for a while. "Maybe we should have a skit night."
"With a criminal organization?" Deidara raised a brow.
"And its hostages," Colette corrected.
"And said hostages' family dog," added Italy.
"…" said everyone again.
Kisame shifted away from Itachi, as the shark-nin had almost been on top of his partner in the search for warmth. "Sounds better than sitting here freezing our asses off."
There was a general murmur of agreement throughout the room.
"Alright," Italy jumped up, taking charge. "Let's split up into three groups of three, the normal partnerships and then Kakuzu and Phoebe with Zetsu."
"Onwards team SaColDei!" Colette snatched Deidara and Sasori into the… broom closet. If she was going to make their team sound like a threesome, she could at least have dragged them… elsewhere.
"KisaItax2 to the kitchen!" cried Italy. That one wasn't too bad.
"Do they have candles?" Zetsu inquired.
Kakuzu looked under the door, "No."
"…" "Ooh la la!" Zetsu snickered.
"So do you care enough to join in?" I said, hopping off Zetsu's lap. Who knew plant could be so comfortable?
"We don't have anything else to do." "Well, nothing inside at least."
"Whatever."
"Let's just do improve," I said. I was good at improve.
"Whatever."
"Alright."
I sat a dozing Kakuzu's feet, listening to the murmurs from the other room and the closet. I entertained myself by turning random things to ash. Unimportant things, mind you. I didn't want Kakuzu to jolt awake being all like, "That cost $35.95! Why would you do such blasphemy to such expensive things? Do I look like I'm made out of money."
My clever retort to his last question, however rhetorical it was, would be, "Well, dogs don't have very good eyesight."
What an awesome conversation…
A fucking hour later…
Kakuzu woke up to "the irk of dog."
I have no idea what that means…
Anyway, we were still bored and Zetsu's white half was sighing about not being around his Italy while black Zetsu told him to suck it up then start growling about Colette's extended absence and being with that blonde bastard no less. If that didn't make his life complicated, then I didn't know what could, except for his schizophrenia and cannibalistic tendencies and looking like a plant hybrid.
"Shut both halves of your mouth up, Zetsu," I growled like literally growled since I'm a dog.
His light side sent me a sour look while his dark side hissed at me. Yes, he fucking hissed at me.
I started barking at his since he wouldn't be able to understand me cussing him out while his dark side simply continued hissing.
"Bow-wow! Ruff! Ruff! Woof!"
"Hisssssss! Hisssssss!"
"Woof!"
"Hisssssss!"
"Woof!" I barked more forcefully.
"Hisssssss!"
"Woof!"
"Hisssssss!"
"Woof!"
"Hisssssss!"
"Tweet!" said Zetsu's light side.
We stopped and sent light Zetsu a peculiar look. Kakuzu sighed, "Thank you! It sounded like a cat got in here again."
Hey, cats aren't my cup of tea.
"So…" I said vaguely, calming down from whatever the hell provoked me. "Whose do you think will be the most… disorderly?"
Kakuzu went quiet as some crashing was heard from the closet.
.
.
.
Don't even think like that!
.
.
.
Great! Now I've got you thinking like that.
.
.
.
"SaColDei, definitely, SoColDei," Kakuzu said.
"Oh, yeah?" I said. "Wanna bet?"
"…Yes."
"Dude, I'm a dog."
"So?"
"So I don't keep money on me!"
"You'll figure out a way to pay when KisaItax2 goes well."
"Oh really? I'm gonna be the one getting paid, though."
"We'll see about that, dog."
"It's a bet, old man."
Yes, yes it is. So the short part one. I might have part two up tomorrow. I might not. You never know.
Thanks for reading and please review. ;)
-See ya!