AU: So I know there a tons of versions of the 3XK ending, but I couldn't help myself. As usual, this includes that scene and a continuation afterwards. Hope you like!

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own Castle, but those who do are doing a great job!

The shimmering lights of the pool illuminated his face as I sat beside him. His expression held many emotions; confusion, anger, helplessness. He had been dangerously close to death that night, and thank the Lord, he had survived. I handed him coffee from the convenience store nearby, waiting until he acknowledged the cup and took it. Coffee had always been a symbol of our relationship, a daily comfort that got us through.

For a moment we sat there, feeling lightly awkward, like something needed to be said but we were unsure what. Refusing to look at his face I asked, "Tell me something Castle, why did he let you live?"

Castle thought for a moment, before realization rearranged his features. "To punish me. To make me pay for ruining his plan." He replied, turning now to look at me, forcing my gaze to him. ". Now he's going to kill again all because I couldn't stop him. And I feel so..."

I reached over and grasped his knee in comfort. It was the only gesture I could think of at the moment, and it seemed fitting. Neither of us ever needed a lot to be aware of the other's compassion. We knew it was there in those emotional eyes, flirty quips, or small gestures. "I know the feeling." And I did. The feeling of being helpless, not being able to stop something as bad as you wanted to. He was not used to falling, not used to this feeling. I'd only ever seen this expression once, the day he told me he was leaving. I didn't realize it at the time, but he felt he had lost; lost me.

"I know you do" said Castle, entwining his fingers with mine. Had this been in a different circumstance my heart would have been beating in my chest, and my body going giddy; but this, this was different. This wasn't a romantic hand holding, or a lets be couple hand holding, it was more than that. It said I get it what you're going through and I'm here for you, always, kind of hand holding. It was an unspoken bond between them that would not break.

It was late at night when we finally pulled into the lot of Castle's building. We hadn't talked much since the hand holding, just filled out the necessary paperwork and then piled into the car. We both knew it was time for him to go upstairs and sleep, but I wasn't quite ready to see him go. I knew I would be seeing him tomorrow, but my heart was still a bit raw from the thought of losing him. Sensing I needed more time he waited patiently, breathing steadily with his eyes on the dash before him. He had already called Martha and Alexis and assured them he was fine. He had told them to go to bed, but no doubt they were waiting up for him.

I tried several times to work out what I wanted to say but nothing seemed to be right. Finally I just suggested walking him up to the loft, using the guise of further assuring the Castle clan as my excuse. He knew that wasn't my real reason, but he nodded in agreement, joining me in getting out of the car and hoping onto the elevator.

As he carefully unlocked the door and stepped inside he was immediately bombarded by Alexis, who wrapped him in a bear hug. I watched as Castle's face lit up, having his little girl in his arms. Martha came over and hugged her son, kissing him on the cheek as she dramatically expressed her worry for him. It was a touching scene to see, and made me flash back to the days when my mom was still alive. I waited patiently in the background and Castle weaved his tale, not as enthusiastically as he usually did. Once in a while Alexis would glance at me for confirmation. Know her dad had the tendency to get carried away, and I helped where I could. The rest of the clan feeling satisfied their patriarch was safe and sound they kissed him goodnight and bid me farewell, leaving us alone once more.

"So..." I began, still not sure how to say what I wanted, but positive that I didn't want to leave.

"Kate?"

"Yes?" I asked, unable to hide the slight hope in my voice.

"Do you want to spend the night? I have a guest room or a couch if you'd like." I had to struggle to keep my excitement in.

"What Castle, no suggestion of sleeping in the same bed? That must have shaken you more than I thought." I regretted my last words as soon as they left my mouth. They sounded insensitive, especially since I had just told him I got what he was going through.

"Yah, actually, it did. But that doesn't mean I can't read you all the same. You clearly don't want to leave your incredibly handsome partner, and I thought I'd be a gentleman and suggest the guest room."

Ahh, I thought, there's my Castle. Smiling I shucked my coat and shoes and pulled him with me to the couch. "Sit" I instructed, placing him against the armrest and grabbing the remote. I settled in beside him, turning on the T.V.

After a while I came to have my head resting upon his chest, his arm wrapped tightly around me. He had been quiet for a good while now, and I thought he had dozed off. "Castle?"

"Yes?"

Fiddling with the button on his coat I cleared my throat slowly before speaking. "I'm really glad you're not dead." I sensed him smile, as his arm grew tighter, wrapping me in an awkward hug.

"I know. You already said that when you untied me." He replied, causing me to smile in return.

"What I meant was I'm really glad you're not dead, 'cause I don't think I could handle losing you."

Castle was silent for a moment, causing me to turn my head to gaze at his face. He brought his hand up to cup my cheek, eyes locking onto mine, invoking all sorts of emotions in me. Before I knew what was happening his lips were against mine, gently crushing them. It was simple and brief, and yet everything I imagined it would be. I didn't care that I was supposed to be Josh, or that he was currently seeing his second ex-wife. All I cared about was us, in this moment, at this point in time.

I smiled sleepily as he withdrew, stroking his thumb across my cheek. "I don't think I could handle loosing you either."

Smiling, I drew him towards me, kissing him once more as tears slowly dripped down my cheeks. He smiled at me as w broke apart, using his thumbs to brush my tears away. Adjusting so we were in a more comfortable position, I laid myself on top him, head once again resting on his chest. He leaned down to kiss the top of my head, as I closed my eyes, his rhythmic back rubbing lulling me to sleep. I didn't care about what we would have to deal with tomorrow. What this meant to our relationship, or how it affected the ones we were supposed to be in. All I cared about was that we were here, alive and happy, with each other.