A/N Hey, soory about all the spelling mistakes, I didn't get time to check it over. Hope ya'll have a Merry Christmas. For all those other random people out there, have you ever noticed that Remus has 'emus' written in it? Enjoy the story.

The Daddy Longlegs
The Best Marauder

It was the last day of term before the Christmas Holidays and everyone was in a frenzy rushing around trying to find last minutes socks and complete homework that they needed the school library for. That is everyone except the occupants of a bedroom containing four sixth year boys. These boys had elected to stay at Hogwarts for the holidays.

James and Peter had gone to do some last minute pranking before everyone had left but Remus was having a much more relaxing time. He was currently sitting on his bed in front of the window which was letting in a small amount of watery sunlight. He sighed softly in pleasure and burrowed further into the warm doona and pillows that covered his bed. The scene was beautiful, showing the state of perfect bliss that the young man was in. That is until a blur of dark hair and pale skin came rushing out of the bathroom and into the dormitory accompanied by a high pitched scream.

Sirius Black ran into the room, covered in only a towel and collapsed into the other boys lap. The scarred boy only just managed to move his book before it became a pile of soggy paper, soaked by the animagus' hair. He placed his book gently to the side, carefully marking the page and looked down at Sirius who was currently trying to bury himself in the werewolf's lap.

"Uhh…Padfoot, you alright?" Remus questioned, running his hands through the others hair to try and calm him down.

Sirius whimpered and looked up at Remus with wide eyes. "Someone was perving on me in the shower."

"Really?" Remus asked, waiting for some abstract story that Sirius had probably imagined.

Remus did not have to wait long; Sirius nodded his grey eyes big and innocent looking, conveying to the werewolf just how traumatized Sirius was by his latest experience. Sirius sat up and straddled the taller boys lap; his eyes now level with Remus'. He began his story, "I, in my magnificent naked glory, was taking a shower as you well know." Remus raised his eyebrow but didn't bother to comment.

"Anyway," Sirius continued, "I was just minding my own business and trying to get a good hold on the soap when the hugest daddy long legs-put that eyebrow down Moony, it was ginormous- jumped out and ravaged my hand biting me." At that Sirius shoved his hand in front of Remus eyes showing him two small red dots one right next to the other. Remus nodded and pretended to be impressed that Sirius had survived such an attack but the dark haired boy saw through the act easily. He looked at Remus feigning hurt and said with considerable dignity, "It hurt and you're lucky I'm still alive. What would you ever do without my glamorous help?"

Remus rolled his eyes and the others dramatics and muttered something that sounded a lot like, "Probably a lot more than I'm doing now."

Sirius decided to ignore this remark and resumed his story telling. "So, as I said, the daddy long legs attacked me and I, with extreme amounts of courage, managed not to make a noise as I flicked it away. As I continued with my shower though I noticed that the perverted spider was always staying really close to me and its creepy, little eyes kept staring at me-honestly, Moonshine, it really did seem to find me very attractive, though that isn't unusual, I am a very attractive guy." Sirius trailed off on a slightly less convincing note.

Remus' eyebrow seemed to have taken up a permanent position half way up his forehead. The werewolf had come to the conclusion that the boy in front of him was officially mad.

Sirius, after taking a large breath, continued his tale, "Anyway, the weird thing started to creep me out so, with great dignity, I shut off the shower and stepped out to dry myself. As I turned back around though, I saw the spider was now on the wall right next to me and it was at a perfect height to stare at my dick-that's right, Moons, it was totally staring at my bits." Remus blushed but Sirius had no such qualms. "That was the last straw and the rest you know-I came running out here to get away from the creepy, perverted animagus hiding in our shower."

Remus stared at Sirius for a few moments and pinched himself surreptitiously, convincing himself that he was not dreaming. Remus then realised something confusing and quickly questioned Sirius, "Wait, the spiders an animagus?"

"Of course!" Sirius replied with conviction, "Only a human would do something like that!"

Remus let out a painfully long sigh. "Sirius, really, I'm sure that spider was only a spider. Anyway, you need to get dressed."

Sirius face changed comically into one of complete horror, "I'm not going in there so that pervert can continue checking me out, only your handsome self and I are allowed to see Sirius Orion Black naked!"

Remus flushed a bright red and pushed the other boy off him. "Sirius, really, go get dressed, I'm sure Prongs and Wormy will be scarred for life if they saw you wearing only a towel."

"But Remus," Sirius protested, having forgot the spider for the moment, "Shouldn't you be taking advantage of the fact that I'm sitting basically naked in your lap. In fact I don't think there's much between you and me except your pants."

Remus neck and face turned the same colour as the hangings on his bed and he said in a low voice, "Sirius get off, I want to read."

Sirius pouted and looked at the other boy with wide eyes. Remus looked up and saw Sirius pulling his perfected puppy dog face and momentarily forgot what he was meant to be saying. Sirius took advantage of Remus' slight hesitation and pressed his lips against the other boys, slipping his tongue into the werewolf's mouth as he let out a small gasp of surprise. Remus quickly melted into the kiss and Sirius grinned in triumph. Sirius pushed Remus down and quickly began to remove the other boys shirt hoping the other two Marauders would not come and interrupt him and his darling Moonykins.