As with so many first snows, the white lasted only the day and by December second the ground was nothing but slushy muck. They sky seemed to mimic the moods of two rather irritated teens, dark and gloomy. It promised nothing more magical than heavy, cold rain. This situation drug on through the week, just as frustrating as Remus and Sirius avoiding each other without cause.

"What are we suppose to do? I don't even know why they are fighting...are they fighting?" James said to Peter in the common room that Friday. "It's getting so close to Christmas, you'd think that Sirius would be turning into that ball of mistletoe induced energy that he always is..."

"I don't know. Maybe Remus is being a girl again..." Peter said. He was stuffing a stolen pie into his mouth as he spoke, spraying bits of crust onto James' jumper sleeve. James gave a half-disgusted look before sweeping the crumbs away.

"Well, I would try to get them to talk myself, if I knew where they were..." James shook his head. Peter just shrugged and took another bit of pie.

Remus looked outside the window of the library. It was the same color as Sirius' eyes again. It was getting late and the cold air was seeping through the glass and chilling his fingers. He knew that being in the library was more or less a bad idea for avoiding Sirius, since that was where everyone expected to find him, but he wanted to look into finding some books on Transfiguration for their next essay. He had gotten terribly side-tracked by the sight of the snow clouds rolling in over the grounds.

"Right then..." He sighed after a few more long moments of watching the sky, then turned to face the stacks. He had to start somewhere and maybe it would distract him for a while.

Outside the library Sirius Black stood. He had been having an argument under his breath with himself for the past ten minutes, getting some strange and unsettled looks from passerby. He still hadn't come to any conclusions when he was found with his forehead pressed to the cold stone wall next to the door by one Lily Evans.

"Sirius?" She raised an eyebrow. She normally only ran into him like this when he was doing something against the rules. "You aren't planning to burn down the library today are you?" She asked cautiously.

"Is Remus in there?" He asked, ignoring the accusation.

"...Yes?" Lily said after a moment of contemplation. "He said you two aren't talking."

"No...he isn't talking. I am stuck. I don't know what he is so bent out of shape for." Sirius said. He didn't even care that he was suppose to be teasing Lily about James' crush on her, which was his usual reaction to seeing the redhead. He was determined to solve the Mystery of Sir Eats to Many Chocolates and Behaves Like a Girl. "...girl! Lily! You're a girl!" He exclaimed suddenly, as if this was some great realization.

"Very good Sirius." Lily said sarcastically. "Now that we have a firm grasp of the obvious, are you going to tell me why you are out here talking to yourself?"

"It's Remus see, sometimes he acts like he has tits-er-is a woman." Sirius amended when he realized that he probably shouldn't be so crude around someone who actually did have tits and might be the answer to all his problems. "Sometimes he does things we don't get...girl things. Well, sort of. He has a diary you know...well, He gets all angry about things and none of us know why exactly. I think he is mad at me because I told him..." Sirius suddenly wondered if this was such a good idea. The thought of trying to explain why he didn't think he would mind kissing Remus seemed even beyond the grasp of Lily. As a matter of fact, he was starting to wonder if friends normally thought kissing their friends would be okay.

"You told him what?" Lily was watching Sirius stare at her like he had abruptly lost his train of thought.

"I told him...that I wouldn't care if I had to kiss him. You know-not like..anything creepy, but that I wouldn't mind it. Now he is all angry and I don't know why..." Sirius' eyebrows pulled together.

"Poor Remus." Lily said after a moment, a look of pained sympathy on her face. Sirius stared at her, more confused than ever.

"What do you mean 'poor Remus'? Do you know what his problem is?" He asked, getting closer to Lily who gave him a frown.

"If you can't figure it out yourself, then it isn't my place to tell you." Lily said softly. She then turned and walked away from the tall boy before he could ask any more questions. No wonder Remus had been so upset the last few nights during prefect duties. He wasn't exactly the type to space out for lengths of time. Now Lily understood perfectly, and felt a large amount of sympathy for the sweet boy. He was the only sane one of his friends.

Love could be properly horrible if the person you like didn't like you back, or even know of your feelings. Remus wouldn't tell Sirius he liked him, even if it meant he a broken heart. That was how Remus was. Lily looked out the window as she was thinking. White flakes had started sifting down from the gray sky. She wondered if she would ever be able to tell James that she secretly was starting to like him. Even if only a little bit. Did James feel like Remus did about Sirius? Did he make that face like he was in pain when she wasn't looking?

Remus glared at the book in front of him accusingly. Books were suppose to be reliable. They were suppose to be the ultimate distraction. Books were the perfect love. Reliable and always there when you needed them, never judging or making his heart ache with a passion that had no certain cause.

So why was the book not doing it's job?

The pages had remained unflipped for a long time now, open to eyes that had no intention of reading. The letters turned into white flakes, like the ones falling out the window behind him. He was standing in the snow, Sirius had taken his hand and they were watching the grounds become a delicate wonderland. It was just like the first snow when they were first years...

Sirius had taken Remus' hand in his own then, they were small though and it had been nothing but innocent childish contact. The little Sirius had taken him out into the whirl of white and cheered happily as he looked around, eyes wide with an ecstatic happiness that had stumped Remus. Sirius saw something magical in the snow that Remus didn't understand, but seeing the angry little boy so happy had made Remus happy too.

It wasn't until years later that Remus was told by James why Sirius loved the snow so much. Until that day Sirius had never actually been out in it. His mother hated the snow and when it came down around his house, Sirius had been forbade to go outside and play in it. He would watch it from the windows, envying it's freedom. That was until the day he had gone out with Remus. The moment became something special. Something he and Sirius had that no one else could take from him or intrude on. It was precious.

"Hey..."

Remus started at the all to familiar voice and stared diligently at the unread words on the page in front of him.

"Moony..." Sirius tried again, shifting on his feet and biting his lower lip. He only ever did that when he was desperate to understand something. Remus kept his eyes glued to the words somewhere in the middle of the page.

"Remus, please...I don't know what I did, but if you will...if you'd tell me, I'll apologize." Sirius sounded close to his wits end and Remus' heart gave a particularly violent pang of guilt mixed with that damned ache that had plagued him for months now.

"You...haven't done anything." Remus said quietly. He still wouldn't look up at Sirius. He could almost see the look on his face. Distress and guilt mixed with surprise.

"I haven't?" Sirius asked, "Then why are you avoiding me?"

"I don't know." Remus lied, he was pretty sure if he kept staring at the paper he would bore a hole through it.

"Yes you do and it would make our lives a lot easier if you would just tell me."

Remus finally looked up at Sirius and felt his eyes catch in the intense look he was getting from the boy leaning on his table.

"I can't." Remus said in a small voice.

Sirius contemplated this for several long moments, then grabbed Remus by the hand and hauled him to his feet, eliciting much protest in the process.

"Sirius-what are you-" Remus sputtered as Sirius pulled Remus too him, lacing their fingers. They then started swaying and moving around the little alcove.

"We are dancing." Sirius stated, cutting off Remus' half formed sputtering.

"Yes...but why?" Remus asked, his face hot.

"Because is is snowing outside, and you are confusing, so I thought I would just do something on impulse since things are already awkward. Dancing without music for example." Sirius grinned.

Remus looked up at him incredulously, then started laughing, pressing his forehead to Sirius' bony, awkward boy shoulder.

This was why Remus couldn't tell Sirius how he felt. He would rather feel this way and not say a word, than risk it all to have something so wonderful taken away from him.

Outside the grounds turned white once again, glistening as evening overtook the day and through the frosted windows to the library, two boys continued to dance to the silent song of snowfall, oblivious to everything else.