Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing that will be mentioned in this chapter. Except possibly… oh wait, no… hold on just a sec… nope, I own nothing. Don't sue!

AN: I have an odd feeling a lovesick Enrique is an out of character Enrique… Of course, these guys are probably all going to be a little out of character… consider yourself warned. Oh, and thanks to iXheartXdemy-chan, who gave me the ideas for the next two chapters! (I couldn't decide, so I just went ahead and did both.) Enjoy! (And thank you so much for showing me !)

The Majestics

It was another average day at Robert's mansion.

Scratch that. It was another boring day at Robert's mansion. Every since the Barthez Battalion defeated them in the qualifying rounds for this year's tournament, there had been nothing to do.

Enrique was bored. Very, very bored. Bianca and Rosetta refused to answer his texts, calls, or emails (he'd even tried all three at once, without success), and he was now sitting at one of the many computers, scrolling through yet another random site he had opened with his eyes glazed over, glancing occasionally at his inbox with a forlorn look in his eyes.

"Hey Enrique," Oliver said walking up to his teammate, "What's up?"

"I'm bored… and unloved," the blond replied, "Why do you wonder?" Oliver rolled his eyes.

"Girlfriend's not talking to you?" He asked sarcastically, knowing full well the answer would be yes.

Surely enough, Enrique nodded. "I'd do absolutely anything to make them pay attention to me," he said desperately. "Anything…" He was still staring at the computer screen, and missed the evil grin that flashed across Oliver's face. This was too perfect!

With a quick flick of the mouse and several keystrokes, the two were staring at an image of a cat with a piece of buttered toast for a body running across a screen. "In the original, his body's a cherry pop-tart," Oliver explained, "But I'm guessing the people who created this were trying to avoid a lawsuit. Anyway, turn the volume up and enjoy! Girls tend to sympathize with you when you're torturing yourself!" With that, he scampered off, hoping not to be hit with the blast of inane music. Off to the Louvre, he thought to himself. Good thing Robert's letting me borrow his private jet… I want to be out of the country by the time Enrique remembers his girlfriends are at a party. He laughed to himself as he hurried down the hallways.

…

Enrique stared at the mute button on the computer for a long moment, then glanced up at the screen again. The cat continued to run in place on the screen, and according to the timer below it, he had been 'nyaning' for almost a full minute. "How childish," he muttered, but turned the volume on anyway. Instantly, the annoying 'nyanyanyanyanyanya' filled the room. He winced. This was most certainly torturous… But he would endure anything to get those girls to notice him! Or at least reply to his emails…

One Hour Later

Enrique was becoming tempted to smash the computer screen to bits. And then burn the speakers. And then check in to an asylum. And then… well, how was he to know? He'd never been to an asylum. Maybe he'd check in, just for the experience. Who knows? Maybe he'd stick around for a while. Anything to escape this music! (If one could even call it music, it sounded more like a cat going through a washing machine, and then auto-tuned to sound like music...)

A few minutes later, poor Enrique slammed his head against the keyboard. The music didn't stop. In fact, because he had hit the volume button, it became louder.

…

Robert was playing a game of online chess with an anonymous opponent. He did not enjoy technology, but at least this person seemed to have an idea of how chess should be played. He was currently deciding if he should send a knight or a rook onto a dangerous square to be captured and clear the way for the other. Probably the rook… after all, if I send the knight, the rook does have a higher chance of being captured later.

Unfortunately, Robert never had a chance to program his move, because a loud and very uncouth yell broke his concentration. Is that Enrique? He knew that it was; Oliver had gone to the Louvre and Johnny was probably digging through trash bins for more terribly unkempt, torn up clothes (Robert liked to believe that the way Johnny dressed was not in style, but rather, a testament to how poor he truly was. No matter how many times it was proven wrong, he held onto his belief like a dog would a chew toy).

Frustrated that he now couldn't remember the reasoning behind the desire to move the rook to be captured, he stormed downstairs to see what was wrong with Enrique. As he descended the steps, he became aware of a strange sound. It was like a strange sort of pop music, without any real words to it. Like a chipmunk being chopped into pieces and then its agonized screams being auto-tuned and played on repeat with some sort of music in the background.

"Enrique, what are you doing?" He asked upon finding the boy sitting with his face on the keyboard of a laptop at the kitchen table.

"Kill me," came the sullen reply. "Please…"

How uncouth, Robert thought. Wanting to die just because of a silly little bit of music. "Absolutely not Enrique," he said. "Why are you listening to this if you don't like it?"

"Bianca and Rosetta refuse to talk with me," he replied. "So I'm torturing myself until they decide to be sympathetic." Robert's mind was whirling.

"Weren't they going to some form of party today?" He asked politely.

Enrique's scream could be heard from three miles away.

…

AN: Okay… I'm really, really sorry about this one. I just suddenly realized it was a lot harder to write a humorous fic than I thought, so I sort of shoved this off to the side. I promise I will try to update faster in the future. Next up, also at the request of iXheartXdemy-chan, will be the BEGA Five. In the meantime, review! Feel free to leave a request for a later chapter as well, and thanks a million for being so patient with me.