PLEASE READ ME!!
There are a couple of things that I want you all to know. First, this story will be dealing with alcoholism, abuse, and there will be swearing. I just want to clarify that point. Also, the "morning after pill" will be mentioned in this chapter. I realize there is a high degree of controversy regarding this drug and I hold my own personal opinions about it, opinions which I will not be discussing nor endorsing here. If you are highly offended by this drug/abortion, then I am sorry but I will not accept flames for it. I have no wish to offend anyone, which is why I am giving fair warning here. If you do read and are offended, I am sorry but please refrain from blaming me.
Also, some of you mentioned that the Kagome and Sesshomaru seem out of character. Many of my characters will be out of character simply because this is an alternative universe and the circumstances of the characters' lives are quite different than the anime/manga. I have attempted to keep their basic character and reactions the same but there will inevitably be some OOC
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Thank you so much for all of the reviews! I'm sure all of you lead busy lives and I want to thank you for taking the time to review and read my story!
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Disclaimer: I own nothing but my dreams…
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Chapter Two
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"How is she?" Sesshomaru asked.
Miroku entered his office and shut the door. He seated himself at his highly cluttered desk before he responded. Miroku was a highly intelligent man and, despite his age, had been in practice for a couple of years. Sesshomaru and Miroku had met in college and remained friends even after their respective careers had drawn them in.
Miroku had agreed to see Kagome after normal hours to ensure that there would be complete privacy. Miroku was a pediatrician but was also trained in gynecology and Sesshomaru knew he volunteered his services at safe houses for women and children. Sesshomaru knew Miroku had the knowledge not only of Kagome's physical needs but also her mental.
"She'll be fine. I put three stitches in her side and took a couple of tests, STIs and so forth. I also gave her an emergency contraceptive." Miroku leaned back in his chair. "The emergency contraceptive is not a…pleasant drug. She will be quite sick for a couple of days. She may experience vomiting and fever. Please keep a close eye on her and I want to see her again in a couple of days. If her fever reaches over 102 or if she begins showing blood in her vomit or urine, you must take her to the hospital."
Sesshomaru nodded and the two were silent for awhile before Sesshomaru spoke.
"Was she…raped?"
Miroku looked at him. "You do realize the position you're putting me in?"
"Tell me, doctor."
"Yes, she was. You realize I normally wouldn't tell you any of this but I know what you're like and asked Kagome first if I could disclose information to you. She agreed that I might." Miroku looked at his desk for a moment. "The physical damage to her body is minimal."
"You emphasize physical."
Miroku directed a hard look at him and the intensity in his eyes made Sesshomaru cringe. He had not intended to be insensitive or obtuse. How could he have forgotten? The reason Miroku worked at crisis centers was because of his sister…the sister whom he had lost when she had been assaulted and then taken her own life.
"I emphasize physical, Mr. Taisho, because the emotional damage from such events is extremely serious."
Sesshomaru looked at him and closed his eyes briefly before reopening them. He returned his gaze to Miroku's and appealed to Miroku with his eyes…attempted to convey his apologies and acknowledgment of not only Miroku's pain but his own. Miroku sighed and nodded.
"Its okay, Sesshomaru."
"Can anything be done?" Sesshomaru eventually asked.
"For now, time and space." Miroku paused. "I never thought you a good Samaritan. Why are you doing this?"
Sesshomaru considered him. "She reminds me of Rin."
Miroku sighed again. "I'm sorry."
"So am I."
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Sesshomaru worked at home for the next week or so. It had been a long time since he failed to go into the office so many days in a row but he was more preoccupied and concerned regarding Kagome then he would have liked to admit. She was always polite but Sesshomaru was disturbed by her listlessness and failure to show interest or energy. It seemed she would have stayed in the guest room always if he didn't occasionally get her to go to other parts of the house. And whenever he checked on her she would be laying in bed or sitting in the chair, hands in her lap, gazing out the window. He even had to prompt her to eat and she seemed only willing to do that in order to humor him.
Sesshomaru recalled Miroku's words that Kagome needed time and space but Sesshomaru also found himself impatient and wishing that there was something he could do.
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Sesshomaru looked up from his paperwork and was surprised to see Kagome standing in the doorway of his study.
"Excuse me," she said. "I can go if you're busy."
"No, come in," Sesshomaru said, trying to hide his surprise.
Kagome stepped in and then asked, "Do you have any movies I could watch?"
Sesshomaru disregarded the feeling that he was being irrational and foolish because of how eagerly he responded to this simple request of Kagome's.
"Yes," he said, standing. "Quite a few. Follow me and we'll see if there's anything you like."
Kagome trailed after him as he led the way into the den. Sesshomaru opened up a standing cabinet, inside were shelves of movies arranged alphabetically. Not a neurotic gesture, Sesshomaru thought defensively. He seldom watched movies but there were so many that it was easier to find the one he wanted if they were in order.
Kagome's gaze roamed over the movie titles. After a few moments Sesshomaru began to wonder if none appealed to her.
"If there aren't any you like," he said. "I could go and rent something."
Kagome's gaze shifted to him and she cocked her head slightly. Sesshomaru suddenly realized how his words had sounded. Talk about eager to please. But Kagome only shook her head.
"No, this is fine. I'm sure I'll find something."
Kagome looked for a bit more before pulling a movie from the shelf. Sesshomaru popped the movie into the player and stood to leave. Kagome settled onto the couch and Sesshomaru turned to go.
"Enjoy."
"Thank you."
Sesshomaru paused near the doorway and looked back as he looked Kagome let out a low laugh. She did not laugh long but Sesshomaru couldn't explain how relieved he was at hearing it. Kagome grew silent and Sesshomaru returned to his study.
Kagome was more talkative at dinner that night and though she wasn't bubbling over with laughter or chatter, Sesshomaru took it as a very good sign that she was so much more engaged and he did his best to encourage her to speak.
Kagome's relatively improved mood did not diminish and it seemed as though she was slowly coming alive. Sesshomaru made dinner the night of his ninth missed work day and the third night of Kagome's improved mood. They sat down at their usual places and Sesshomaru served up the microwave meals he'd put into the little used oven. Sesshomaru wasn't very hungry and instead kept a discreet eye on Kagome, careful to keep silent. She finished nearly all her food.
Kagome helped him to do the dishes before excusing herself to take a shower and go to bed. Before she could leave Sesshomaru wanted to clarify something with her.
"Are you okay if I go into work tomorrow?"
"Yes."
"Okay. I'll probably be gone before you wake up so I'll see you around seven."
"Okay."
Sesshomaru watched Kagome go up to the guest room before he went to his study, shutting the door behind him. He went to the desk and slowly righted a frame that was face down on the desk's surface. Grinning from the photo was Rin at age ten, her large eyes dancing with happiness and her mouth curved in a wide grin.
Sesshomaru poured himself a stiff drink and before he knew, was pouring a second and a third. Sesshomaru fingered the small ring on the chain around his neck as he drank his fourth. Feeling his consciousness wavering he stumbled up to his bedroom and dropped ungracefully onto his bed where he knew no more until the ringing of his alarm jolted him awake.
Sesshomaru let out a groan as he pressed hands to his throbbing head before turning off the buzzing alarm with an impatient thump. He staggered out of bed and went to the bathroom. He looked into the mirror and an extremely undistinguished figure with shadowed bloodshot eyes, pale face, and tangled hair greeted him.
He took a quick shower and dressed in a navy suit. He impatiently brushed out his long hair and tied it back, cursing his throbbing head the whole time. He left the house and picked up some coffee before heading to work.
Sesshomaru pulled into the driveway at 7:45 that night tired and anticipating a hot shower…damn! He still had to cook dinner. Great. However, after he'd closed the door behind him, he smelled cooking food. He walked into the kitchen and set down his briefcase. Kagome stood at the stove with an apron tied over his sweats and t-shirt.
"Smells good," he said. "What are you making?"
"Stew and rice. Is that okay?"
"That's great. I'm not much of a cook."
"I used to cook every night."
Sesshomaru glanced at her face but she didn't seem upset.
"Are you feeling better today?" Sesshomaru asked.
"Yes. Thanks for letting me stay here; it's almost like a vacation."
"My pleasure. You didn't have to cook though."
"I know. But I wanted to. Do you want to eat?"
"Yes."
Kagome dished up the food and they once again sat along the kitchen counter.
It had been a long time since Sesshomaru had had anything but premade meals or takeout and he was surprised how good the food tasted…it awoke a hunger that he hadn't felt in a long time.
"It's very good. Thank you."
"You're welcome," she said with a small smile. "I'm glad you like it."
"I'm glad to see you smile."
Kagome looked at him, puzzlement on her face. What had possessed him to say that? He didn't…but he did like to see her smile, it was so gentle and warm and it gave him no end of relief to see the smile in her eyes as well as upon her lips.
Kagome gave him another small smile before getting up to clean the dishes. Sesshomaru left and went to get the box he'd left in the hall.
"Here," he said as he returned to the kitchen.
"What is it?"
"Open it."
Kagome opened it and withdrew the pair of jeans, pair of pants, three shirts, undergarments, nightshirt, and tennis shoes he'd bought her.
"Oh," Kagome said. She smiled. "Thank you but you didn't have to."
"I hope they fit okay."
"I'm sure they will. Thank you."
Kagome gave him another smile and Sesshomaru felt, for a moment, his mind go blank.
Shaking himself from his stupor Sesshomaru nodded and said, "You're welcome."
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Over the next few weeks Kagome's listlessness and depression mostly disappeared, revealing her true personality. She was cheerful and kind with a quick smile and an infectious laugh. In addition to her good humor she possessed thoughtfulness, honesty, and a strong sense of honor. She still somewhat reminded Sesshomaru of Rin but…but not exactly. Sesshomaru was somewhat disturbed at how he was less and less reminded of Rin and simply reminded of Kagome. Part of this was due to the fact that he in now way, any longer, thought of her in a role resembling a daughter. This fact disturbed him because it let the following problem: what did he consider her as? He didn't think he wanted to answer that question.
The two of them had fallen into a routine. Sesshomaru went to work Monday through Friday from eight to six, Kagome had taken over the cooking and various household chores. Sesshomaru had protested but Kagome had only laughed and said she wanted to and had to "earn her keep". Sesshomaru hoped she was joking about the last part but he hadn't asked. Sesshomaru often went in on Saturdays as well but he usually didn't go in until ten and left by four, so on Saturdays Kagome cooked breakfast for the two of them. Sundays were quiet with reading, movies, and an occasional game of rummy. Sesshomaru felt a little guilty about how much he was working but he had responsibilities though he had to admit…he was perhaps working more then he would have. He felt a little…uncomfortable. But he couldn't exactly say why. She was a nice person and yet…what was she to him? He decided not to answer that question.
"Sesshomaru?"
He looked at her over his newspaper. "Yes?"
"Am I becoming a burden to you?"
He lowered the paper. "Why do you ask?"
"Well, you didn't even know me when you took me in and I've been staying her with you almost a month…"
"You're not a burden and you are free to stay here as long as you need."
"Thank you…it's just that…I can't stay here forever…I can't hide forever."
Sesshomaru only nodded. What could he say to that?
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"Rin," Sesshomaru whispered to her smiling photo. "Rin, have you forgiven me?"
He poured another drink. "I failed you Rin. I promised that you wouldn't get hurt again. I promised to take care of you. I broke my promise. You got hurt. I'm so sorry."
He drank from his third glass as he pulled out Rin's necklace and held it in his palm. He gently ran a finger over the sooth metal. Rin…with a sudden angry snarl he whirled around and knocked over the chair. He didn't even pause as he slammed the picture face down.
"Sesshomaru?"
Sesshomaru turned around and felts some of the anger ebb as he saw Kagome, dressed in pajamas, standing in the doorway.
"Sesshomaru. Are you all right?"
Sesshomaru bit his tongue, trying to get a hold of his temper. He could not take out his anger on Kagome. That was the last thing she needed.
"Yes. I'm fine."
She hesitated. "Are you sure?"
Sesshomaru didn't answer and Kagome entered with faltering steps. Her eyes took in the overturned chair, him, and finally the overturned photograph.
"Whose ring is that?"
Sesshomaru looked down and belatedly realized that he had forgotten to replace the ring in his shirt. He decided not to answer.
"It's a small ring. Was it your daughter's?"
Sesshomaru turned around and refused to answer.
"Sesshomaru?"
He gritted his teeth and felt his jaw clench almost painfully. Why couldn't she just leave him be? Let him alone? He abhorred people seeing his weakness and she wouldn't leave. What was her problem?
"Sesshomaru? Are you okay?"
"Fine. Just leave," he said coldly.
Sesshomaru suddenly smelled the scent of tears thought Kagome made no sound. By the time he steeled himself to turn around, Kagome had gone. Sesshomaru stood and stared at the empty doorway. He felt a sudden twinge of guilt and a sudden need to go after her. After standing in the same spot for nearly eight minutes he slowly sat down in a chair.
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I hope you all enjoyed this chapter…it was a little hard to get out because I went to a concert last night, hehe. Dir en Grey!! If you all haven't heard them, I would recommend them…anyways, please read and review!