Abused: Chapter 3
The next morning
Castiel hadn't slept all night the horrors of the following day had completely taken over his mind, he was miserable,felt sick to the stomach and was tired of crying,he kept telling himself to stop being so fucking weak,but how could he not?
He jumped as he heard the bedroom swing open,he had no idea what time it was.
Dean came strolling through "Morning sunshine,your up early"he grinned rubbing his forehead "ugh my head is pounding,do we have any painkillers?"
Cas sat eyes wide staring into space "cabinet"he muttered quietly looking down trying to stop himself from crying again,just seeing his face disguisted him,yeah okay he was drunk last night but that was no excuse.
"Thank god,I got a banging headache,I should never drink on the job,never ends well."he sighed "HEY look sorry for coming home late,I know you had this big night planned,but Sammy dragged me into this job he's working on,you know how he gets,cant survive without his big bro."
Castiel swallowed hard pulling the blanket over him tightly lightly sobbing "don't worry about it"he answered back,his voice shaky.
Dean headed over to him after making himself a coffee and smiled weakly noticing how distant he was "everything alright?"
Castiel quickly pulled himself up needing to get as far away from him as possible being pulled back once more, Cas this time was quick to pull himself from from Deans grasp slapping Dean hard across the face "DONT TOUCH ME".
Dean felt the sting on his cheek leave a red mark,looking to Cas confused "what the hell is wrong with you?"
Castiel just laughed "are you really just going to stand there and pretend you dont know?"
Dean noticed the cut on Castiels forehead his eyes wide and paleness of his skin"HOLY SHIT,dude what happened,you've completely lost me?"
Castiel covered himself up and simply smiled "forget it,doesn't matter"he should probably explain,but then why bother it wasn't like it would make it all go away theres no easy way to say "you raped me last night." he forced a smile "misunderstanding I guess"he let out a heavy sigh "i'm going for a shower."he quickly walked away to avoid anymore awkwardness.
Dean stood there baffled rubbing his cheek confused "Oooookaaay?" clearly something went on last night between them that he couldn't remember.
finally cleanesed Castiel got himself dressed knowing he would have to face Dean and probably have an explanation as to why he was acting wierd. He took a deep breath and made his way to the living room finding Dean sat on the sofa.
Dean glanced up awkwardly and smiled weakly"Cas"he inhaled then exhaled "i'm sorry...I dont even know what to say-"
"I do,you were wasted and out of your mind,whatever shit you and your brother did yesterday it completely fucked you up,and hey you just took it all out on me,no big deal."he shrugged.
"No big deal?" he pulled himself up "Cas...look at what I did to you,I could've killed you,I never...ever meant to hurt you like that."he remembered,he remember everything.
Castiel slipped his hands into his pockets awkwardly and shrugged "yeah..I know,it wasn't you,I know that"he looked down at his feet "can we just forget about it."
Dean rubbed his lips together nervously wondering if they could ever get past this "If thats what you want,yeah...look im free all day today if you want to do something,maybe go to the movies or I dunno whatever you want."
Castiel smiled weakly at him knowing how guilty he felt,giving him a nod "sure,but how about breakfast,its Tuesday and I know how much you love the special."
Dean grinned rolling his eyes "alrighty sounds good,just let me change first."
After breakfast,which by the way was probably the most cringeworthy half an hour anyone could go through the couple decided to return home, the day not exactly starting off so well.
Dean sighed heavily" how many times am I going to have to say sorry huh Cas, I was drunk,I didn't know what I was doing."
Castiel sat in the shotgun seat of the impala,arms folded and looking away from him "yeah I know I said it was fine."
Dean felt sick with guilt,he knew this was eating them both up "then please,just look at me okay,please"he pleaded,when Cas refused he got angry "Look at me dammit."
Cas jumped turning his head to look at him,he shook his head opening the car door and slammed it shut storming inside.
Dean gritted his teeth slamming his hands against the steering wheel "FUCK"he yelled to himself giving himself a moment, he reached for a bottle of 'hunters helper' taking a swig from it,anything to calm himself down. He eventually went back inside hearing Cas talking.
"I don't give a fuck you get him on the phone right now."
"I dont know what to tell you,Sam's not here,call back later huh?"
"you think im a fucking idiot,I can hear him now get him on the god damn phone this instant."
Dean slammed the front door raising an eyebrow "who the fuck you talking?"he slipped his jacket off throwing it aside clearly pissed off. "give me the phone"he ordered.
"so what I can't use the fucking phone anymore huh,fuck off."he went to walk away.
"CAS...don't push me,just give me the phone."he snapped snatching the phone off him and hung up.
Castiel turned to face Dean seeing the anger in his eyes "Dean...look I just I want answers,what happened last night?"
"Whats it matter to you,you've never given a shit what I do on my cases whys now any different?"
Castiel stood his ground,being very careful what he said "because your not yourself right now,i'm worried okay...I know meeting your family is always a fucked up situation but we share everything Dean...please,what happened last night?"
Dean gritted his teeth grabbing Cas by his shirt and slammed him to a wall ready to pound into him again.
Cas grunted looking into his partners predatory eyes,pain in his own "you going to teach me a lesson now Dean,hmm,I won't fight it." he simply smiled,but deep inside he was terrified what Dean might do to him.
Dean pulled himself away and held his hands up in surrender "I'm not a bad person remember."he shrugged, hating how this was the way things were with them right now,if he could rewind time and start over the last few days he would.
Castiel stood back against the wall still,slowly looking up at Dean,it was stupid of him but it was instinctual " I Love you." he said painfully,it was honest but forced,a way of calming the situation,if he said he loved him maybe all this would be better atleast until the next time he flipped.
Dean gulped staring back at his lover holding out a hand for him to take "I love you too." also coming across geniuine.
Cas willingly took Deans hand and smiled weakly happy to have him back for now, the rest of night was spent snuggled up against the sofa watching this old western on tv,Dean reciting the whole words,they were happy again and thats all the two of them wanted atleast for now.
2 months later
Things had gotten progressively worse,Cas hadn't left the house for months,Dean wouldn't let him,the phone had been disconnected, any communication to the outside world was impossible,he had once tried to steal Deans cell,only to call for help but it resulted in a pretty bad beating,he certainly wasn't doing that again soon, it had even gotten to the point that Dean was refusing to go on hunts,only to keep an eye on him. He didn't understand what changed in his boyfriend,if only he found out what happened that night he could make some sense of this.
He stood near the bed dripping wet looking down at Dean who lay casually along their bed "strip"he commanded putting his head to the side.
Cas nodded knowing he would probably want it over and down with so quickly removed his tshirt tossing it to the side.
"slowly"
Cas looked down,unbuckling his belt buckle slowly his hands shaking as he pulled them down standing there in just his boxers.
Dean let out a small moan having already removed his own.
Cas panted heavily already expecting what was to come but then Dean was changeable.
Dean pulled him forward by the waistband of his boxers "Come on Cas,my dick won't suck itself now will it?"he smirked "you know you want it"
Cas shook his head,after 2 months of abuse he couldn't take it anymore"Fuck you...im not your little whore that you can just use when you please,I am not afraid of you anymore, im leaving" he must of been insane but he couldn't stay in this damn house anymore,he managed to find something quick to change into hurrying to find something to defend himself with knowing full well that Dean would come after him. Holding a knife in his hands he spun round Dean already standing there.
Dean burst out laughing at him as he held the knife to him "don't play the tough Cas it doesn't suit you."
"Stay back...I mean it Dean,stay the fuck back,I'll use it if I have to."
"no you won't,you love me too much,come on im sorry...I was an idiot,I lost my temper I didn't mean to."he carefully put his arms out pulling his best puppy dog look.
Cas bought into this act in the past but now he wasn't that stupid"No...no don't do that"he gritted his teeth hands trembling knowing this was all a game but couldn't himself to forgive him,he did love him too much,that was the crazy thing of it,no matter what Dean did to him,he always took him back. He dropped the knife,preparing for whatever he was going to get.
Dean smiled taking his hand "there there its all going to be okay".
Cas smiled weakly completely missing the swing of his fist slamming him hard in the jaw forcing him to fall to his knees, and then comes another,and another,and the hits just keep on coming,he was definately going to feel his wrath tonight,I learnt not to escape before but as ever I was obedient towards him.
"You ever think about leaving again,i'll kill you"he took one last swing forcing Cas to fall to the floor,curled up. "go wash up,i'll cook us your favourite."
Cas laid there for a moment bruised and broken literally crawling to get himself away,it hurts to much to stand up,he tried to reach up to the table to pull himself up"Dean-"he called out to him desperately. "Dean...I can't move."
He doesnt get any response from him "DEAN...PLEASE,I NEED YOUR HELP" he pulls himself up far and the collapses to the floor,his head pounding,everything went numb and he blacked out.
When he woke he found himself in the bath full of warm water,he frowned al ittle dazed an confused,was this Deans way of showing some kind of remorse,cause if it was then fuck him,it was his fault that he was like this. He lay there paralysed,his whole body aching.
Dean came back through"your awake,thought I'd lost you for a second there." He knelt down beside him,cleaning him up,he took a sponge gently moistening it and dabbed it against Castiels eye.
Cas hissed,he could barely see but he could sense Dean near him "Dean?"
"yeah"
Cas wanted to cry,but it hurt to much "why are you doing this to me?"
Dean felt a lump in his throat,pulling himself up gripping hold of the sink bowl tightly almost breaking the porcelain, he swallowed hard looking up at his own reflection in the mirror all the anger,and hatred of himself came flooding back to him,the past months eating away at him. He slammed his fist into the mirror shattering it to pieces crying out a pitful and rageful scream.
Cas curled up into the corner of the bathtub terrifed "Dean..please calm down...please im sorry I-I didn't mean to make you mad."
Dean burst into tears "I...I couldn't stop it,I let that bastard take him, and kill him until there was nothing left."
Castiel frowned,even though it was hard to tell and gulped moving slowly towards him "who...Dean did something to happen Sam?"
Dean clenched his hand into a fist slamming it down into the sink looking over at his disfigured lover " Cas...i'm a horrible,horrible person...I am a killer after all,you were wrong,im bad to the bone."
"No your not-" he sat up reaching out to him "whatever you think you did,it was probably an accident...you can turn this around,help me okay,call 911, I think I have a few broken ribs...please Dean."
Dean shook his head at him "no...no your leaving me...everybody leaves me and I wont let you leave."panic in his voice.
"Listen to me...if I wanted to leave,I would've gone...look at the state of me,you broke me,you've hurt me...but i'm still here,it's because I love you...I'm not leaving you,I promise."
Dean looked up at him sadly kneeling down beside him "you still love me,even after all this,your crazier than I am."he smirked running his fingers through his hair roughly letting out a little laugh pulling him into a kiss,forcing it upon him "come on show me you still love me."
Cas moaned into his mouth slowly lifting his hands up placing a hand on his cheek,the kiss deeper and more intimate than before.
Dean continued the kiss until he was completely satisfied,then pulled away a small smile on his face "thank you"he pulled himself up leaving the bathroom.
"Dean...DEAN...come on please"he groaned completely helpless and in pain as he lay there naked in the bathtub.
Reaching an arm behind his back,Castiel tugged on the plug hole rinising awway the deep red water,feeling weak,his body trembling from the cold. He breathed heavy trying to pull himself out,he looked down finiding Deans cell phone on the floor,taking the oppurtunity he reached out for it to the best of his abilty,calling 911 immediatly.
"911 whats your emergency?"
"Helloo...I need,a doctor,police,hell send everyone,i've been attacked,I think I have a few broken ribs..please you've got to help me." he was practically whispering down the phone,not want Dean to hear.
"We shall do our best to do that for you sir,can you tell us where you are?"
"2214A Willow Street,please send someone quick,I can't talk long."
"Is there someone else in the house with you?"
"He's here...and he's crazy...hurry."
"Dispatch is on their way sir,hang in there."
Castiel hung up the phone throwing the phone back to make it look like it was in the same place and let out a small sigh of relief,crying out as he tried to move back into place.
Dean returned wiping away his tears "I'm sorry,let me make it better for you,get you patched up,you know how good I am with a needle and thread,you'll be good as new in no time."
Castiel shuddered looking up into his eyes and just nodded "I love you."I guess that was also his way of saying sorry.
"I know you do,you don't have to keep on saying it,i'll explain everything to you alright,I promise,everythings going to be okay."
Castiel just smiled reaching out a hand to touch his skin "hmm yeah...everything WILL be okay."
Dean frowned suddenly,Cas was up to something,he was far to calm,he looked back finding his phone on the floor,he reached for his pockets where he would usually put it,it was empty,turning back to face him "what did you do?"
Cas smiled still "saving you from yourself Dean,they'll be able to get you the help you need."
"You called the fucking cops...you idiot...why the hell did you do that because I pushed and shoved ya a few times?"
Cas flipped out "no shit sherlock...and you call this shoved,I cant feel my body you sick twisted son of a bitch."
"I'm not the crazy one in this relationship Cas...you had your chance to get out,first time I raped your sorry ass, and you blew it."
Castiel gulped "YOU can't hurt me anymore Dean,your going away for a very long time,they're already on their way...I won."
Dean gritted his teeth,panicked now quickly coming up with a plan ,he grabbed some gaffer tape,ripping enough off the roll to cover Castiels mouth and around his wrists and ankles,not that he was going anywhere but he can never be too careful. "you know I was actually going to give us another go,but no more." he heard a knock at the door,he looked back "theres my queue,now you be good for daddy,i'll bring you back a nice reward when I get back."
Castiels eyes widened yelling and cursing through the tape restraining him from speech.
Another tap at the door.
Dean took a deep breath opening the door slightly ajar and frowned"there a problem officers?"
"We're responding to a 911 call made 20 minutes ago from this address,you mind if we take a look inside?"
They were armed,there wereatleast 5 of them,shit this wasn't going to end well.
"911 call,I think you've got the wrong address,its just me."
The officers looked Dean up and down "we really must insist sir,if theres no problem then we'll be out of your hair." about to force themselves inside.
"Well I say unless you've got a warrant i'm going to have to refuse."he shrugged "now get off my porch" he wasn't exactly making himself look innocent but,hey he's a Winchester,he can make himself dissapear,like Criss 'fucking' angel,that dude was a douchebag.
"We'll be back,I suggest you don't go anywhere."
Dean gave them a smug smile and saluted "happy to do business with you officers." with that he slammed the door in their faces.
Returning straight to the bathroom he looked Castiel right in the face "thought they'd never leave",he ripped the tape off his mouth.
"Dean...please just stop this,I know you,you're a hero,you save lives you don't take them...please,your killing me here,just let me go,im begging you."
"I can't do that Cas,minute I let you go,you'll tell people what i've done."
Castiel shook his head "I won't I promise I won't,please come back to the good side,the darkside isn't you."
Dean gulped turning his back to him, he had a taste for this now,and it wasn't going to stop,its like he actually enjoyed hurting Castiel and that made him feel sick,he still loved him,but there was something deep inside his soul that was bad,that night something inside him changed,something he was going to have to live with for the rest of his life.