SLAP
In front of me, Gilbert is fuming like a girl with a PMS. Okey, never mind that I said such stuff about him. But really, you just don't have to slap people in the face and then will say "There's a mosquito on your face." And then go berserk like I did something idiotic again. Hey, I'm not the only idiot here.
"What?! Dude, why do you have to do that?!" Gilbert exclaimed.
"I really don't have to do that actually." I said.
"He will misunderstand things that you do to him!"
"Or say to him…yeah, yeah. I know." I huffed.
"Is he…a homo?" he paused.
"Not that I'm discriminating him or whatever, I'm just asking." He asked.
"I don't know. He seems straight. I don't mind though. I don't think he will fall to me. That's not what I want." Why you even ask anyway?
"Then, what do you want? What made you to reach up to him? Is he that hopeless for you?"
"I don't want him to fall into the pit of hell."
"I know, we don't want that to happen to our friends and family too."
I looked up to him. He seemed to think about of what he is about to blurt out again. He's just worried of me. I know that very well, but there's this side of me which thinks that he is jealous because I found someone…someone to use as an escape from him. Again. I chuckled at the thought of it. What am I thinking? I'm not supposed to think about this. Gilbert won't think like that. When did I become so impure? Oh, yeah. From the very first moment that I stepped out of this world.
"Just be careful of what you are doing. Check your intentions before you do stuffs like that."
"Uh-huh~"
"Are you even listening to me?" he asked, frustrated.
I nodded.
"You're not taking me seriously."
I grinned.
"Don't let things to happen again." He stared seriously.
I sighed. "Hm hm, yeah. I won't let that to happen." In my mind, I have no control of myself, I don't even know why I approached Arthur.
"I wont.." I repeated.
"I'm sorry, I'm nagging you too much. I'm just…. I'm sorry. I'm so over protective of you. This past weeks, you're not acting yourself. I'm worried."
I snickered. "I'm not suicidal. I can't let my emotions stop me from living here." I grinned.
He huffed. "Not awesome, dude."
"I don't think every guy that will pop up in my life would always turn out to be gay on me, same to you too, dude."
"Psh! The other day you told me that there's this guy told you that if you were a girl, he wants him to be your boyfriend." Gilbert snickered.
I almost vomit at what he just said. "That's past okey. And that guy is ridiculous! I'm too manly! I have a freaking muscles and abs!"
Gilbert just laughed at me. The nerve.
"Dude.." I said after a minute of silence.
"What?" Gilbert asked, confusedly.
"I watched porn yesterday." I said staring at anything but Gilbert.
He slapped my back very hard."How come you will overcome your addiction if you're still doing that?!"
"Ugh…that hurts..I'm bored, and you're not texting me so I watched it instead." I reasoned.
"Really, you…there are many things you should do. You still haven't started the comics you promised to do this last summer!"
"Oh… I almost forgot about that." I smiled barely.
"Argh! How come we become friends anyway? Coz I don't know anymore." He slumped his self beside me.
"Now, now my awesome best friend, don't be like that! We become best friend coz we are way too awesome than the others. Haha kidding!"
"Say, does the past still haunting you?" Gilbert asked.
"Yeah. I thought the porn will turn me off, it did though, but I feel guilty."
"Pornography turns on people, not turning them off! What kind of brain do you have, idiot?!" he shouted. It almost tore off my ear from my head.
"Ahahaha, easy there dude! I'm okey now, a bit."
"Tsch! Oh yeah?"
I nodded.
"Don't make the awesome me worried, ok?" he stared at me directly frowning a bit.
I grinned."Geez, you're more of a worry wart than me, eh?"
He slapped my side this time, really, it hurt to be slapped by a guy than by a girl. Sigh.
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It took me awhile to clean my room, a pile of text books in my left, while a pile of occult hard bound books in my right. I haven't opened those books since the accident with my family, those were the only things I have that reminds me of them. Was that really an accident? Or my mind playing tricks on me again? I don't even know what's real to not. My head hurts every time I think for a reason, but this world has so many theories and ideologies. Things that covers the truth, reasons that hides the only real things that will save humans. Why humans do that? They exchanged the truth of God for a lie and worshipped and served created things other than the Creator.
Oh my, didn't I even fall to that? I lied to myself to save face and to keep me sane. But isn't that sin holding me back here in this world keeping me dead though I'm still alive. I feel like a zombie already, minus the biting part. I didn't noticed it at first, I thought what I had just discovered is the truth, making me feel like I'm a genius. Human didn't realized it yet, but they already playing god in their own way, they always look for something that will give evidence to their reasons or prove something. Oh how foolish. We live in a world where millions of young people have been taught that everyone gets to define what is right and wrong in their own eyes. How many souls do you suppose have been deceived and damned by that pernicious doctrine? One of the many dangers of wrong doctrine is that it only increases sinful desires.
I hope I have someone to talk to. I sighed. Someone to share my problems and thoughts. Someone to correct me when I am about to do silly things, because admit it, even though I'm smart, I still tend to do some embarrassing things. And most of all, someone to stay with me and love me. Wait, love me? Ugh.
I mean care for me. I blushed at the thought.
RING RING RING
I opened my cellular phone to see a message from Alfred
'Have ya read a bible verse today?'
My gaze had caught the bible on my bedside table. I winced at the thought of grazing my fingers on the top cover of the bible. The last time I tried to open it, my left hand almost burned. That was the time after the accident. It was the only thing left on fire. I thought it was impossible, but that bible made it, not acquiring any damage from the enormous fire I have done to our house and my family.
But weird, I thought I won't understand the things written inside of it, but for some reason, even though I can't open any bible and read through it, when someone preaches or share some verses, I could understand the message, and yet, I always stumble and can't act on the message nor obey it, as a law. Seems like I lack of something important. I really needed that salvation and forgiveness but I don't know what I have to do to attain it. Oh yeah, there's this some verses that really can't go through me. Even though how much I study for it, I still can't understand it. Like, it is the verses that always being preached in church but I still don't get the meaning from it.
I lit up my cellular phone again and typed a reply, 'No, I have not read it yet.'
RING RING RING
'aww why not? : '
'I would be glad if you'll be the one to read it to me.'
'pffft! Sure dude! Are you free today?'
'Eh, I was just kidding. Anyways, yes, I am free today.'
'yosh! I'm coming at your place! I'm gonna read you some bible verses~!'
'Alright.'
I sighed. This guy can't read the atmosphere. How dense. I glanced at the bible and winced again at the idea of opening it. I thought of a fire is going to burn not just my left hand but my whole body this time.
That might frighten my little Alfred. I snickered at the thought of it. What kind of reaction could I see on those sky blue eyes this time?
Why am I so fond of this kid anyway? I know it is not appropriate at all. I imagined the time that his father and I will meet again. That old man will surely be shocked to see me again.
KNOCK KNOCK
Before I could say that he is welcome to come in, Alfred burst into my living room giving me a toothy grin of his.
"So let's start now that I am here!"
I rolled my eyes, "Sure, lad."
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AN: nyah~ it's been a while! Sorry, this one got too late. And as usual, full of grammar errors. Sheeeeeeeeeeeeezzzz….. I sure got really rusty in it since I stopped going to university. Oh how I miss it.
Recently, I've been working on my doujin so that's why this one took a while to be posted.
Ah~ how I wished I have someone to correct my grammars before I post it in here XC
OH wells, I'm also so hooked up in using tumblr (follow me if you guys want coz I'm probably gonna post the doujin I'm working on there and some fan arts) aias13aura . tumblr . com