Well, I'm back in your good graces again.

You've gotta be kind to yourself.

So many things that we'd like to have,

but we just cannot hold.

You've gotta be kind to yourself.

Me and You - She and Him

. . .

Weeks slid by like years as the end of school approached. Unlike like all her friends who were celebrating their remaining moments of high school, Bella found herself more often than not cooped up inside the Cullen house, mostly with Alice and Edward. For them, senior year was just another event, and they found her wishes to go to parties and sign yearbooks trivial.

Even Edward, who had once dogged her endlessly to have each and every human experience possible before she was changed, had changed his tune in favor of keeping her inside. Speaking of, Edward had come back a few days after their almost-oral-sexcapade and they'd been at an awkward place ever since. Bella tried to ignore him and let Alice do as she pleased while she read whatever book struck her fancy. Mostly, it was books that Carlisle had supplied her with out of sympathy. Good man, Carlisle was.

Despite all her time at the Cullen house, Bella saw very little of Jasper, and heard even less from him. A few texts here and there, a few flashes of blond and jeans while he slipped back into his study after hunting. Evidently, he had been doing very well with getting accustomed to the "vegetarian" diet once again.

Despite her anger toward Jasper after her and Edward's awkward almost-sexual encounter, she couldn't help but want to hang around the blonde empath. Although their time together either left her hot and bothered or confused and hurt, she couldn't deny that she wanted to see him again. Unfortunately, her poetic good riddance had done the trick, and now she was too proud to go to him.

A quiet sigh escaped her lips, and Bella opened her eyes, finally feeling the brushes still from coating makeup on her face. Finally. She felt like she was ten pounds heavier.

"Bella, why are you in such a foul mood? I't's graduation!" Alice exclaimed, hugging her friend tight around the shoulders.

Bella opted not to say anything, but rather to examine her face in the mirror. Gone were the dark circles under her chocolate eyes, flawless, pale skin taking it's place. The light acne scars from her times as a pizza-and-brace-face were gone, smoothed out by the makeup, and her already long, dark lashes were coated with mascara, which only made them feel kind of heavy and stiff. (But admittedly, they were a bit more defined, now, with the darker color.) Alice had highlighted the largeness of her eyes with a pale, shimmery shadow on her lids that faded out into a dark purple color, and a light coat of eyeliner across her waterline. As much as Bella hated to admit it, she did actually look somewhat pretty, even with the strange feeling that she was ten pounds heavier. Alice beamed as she saw the approval on Bella's face.

"I told you," she scolded her friend, lightly taking the clips out of Bella's dark hair, letting the hot roller slide out, the easy curl falling onto her shoulders, "you just have to trust me."

Bella rolled her eyes lightly, watching as her hair was pulled out of the rollers, the perfection of the curls kind of unnerving. She was not one for perfectly coiffed hair; she much preferred a messier look, but she'd have to deal. The second she protested, Alice would rip her head off. Seemed to Bella that the only time Alice was even close to nice was when she was happy or doing what she wanted. Irritating little pixie. Much to Bella's relief, Alice brought out a brush and ran it through the tight curls, loosening them a bit, giving them a more natural look. Bella winced slightly; Alice was not one for being gentle.

"There," Alice announced, clapping her hands together with a wide smile. Bella glanced up to study herself again but flicked her eyes back down to her book. "Book up." The book was stolen from her hands, and Alice's hands were prodding at the robe Bella had on.

Clutching the robe to herself, Bella shook her head. "Just give it to me," she said with a frown, holding the robe to her with one hand and offering out the other.

Glaring impatiently, Alice handed her a small stack of clothes then huffed and went off to help Rosalie who had called for her. Pressing her lips together, Bella got to her feet and slipped the robe off after closing - and locking, though that wouldn't do much if Alice really wanted in - the bathroom door.

Turning her back to the mirrors of the room, Bella slid the panties - which were pretty much a glorified scrap of lace - up her thighs and clasped the bra into place. Bella honestly had no idea why Alice gave her such proactive undergarments. It wasn't like anyone was going to see them. Irritating little pixie.

As she pulled on the simple, long sleeved dress, then glanced up finally at the mirror. It hugged her frame carefully, yet was loose enough to hide the flaws on her body. Bella breathed out a sigh of relief, overjoyed that she had not been given some skin-tight, barely-there dress. You really never knew with Alice. Stepping out of the bathroom, she gave the waiting vampire a small twirl. With a squeal and a clap of her hands, Alice bounced over and kissed Bella's cheek.

"You look lovely. Come on, let's go get some pictures."

Bella's features transformed into a grimace. "Pictures?" she asked weakly as she was being pulled down the stairs.

At the bottom, Edward waited, looking quite dapper in a simple button down and slacks. A broad smile broke across his face as he saw Bella, taking her from his sister's arms and pulling her in for a hug.

"You're gorgeous," he murmured into her ear.

Embarrassment sent heat flooding to her cheeks and she pulled back slightly, running her fingers through her dark hair. "Sure, sure. Let's just get these pictures done with, yeah?"

Chuckling quietly, Edward kissed the top of her head, wheeling her with a guiding hand on her elbow, toward the living room, walking in with her. As they entered the living room, Alice handed her a pair of red flats and her silver gown.

"Bless you, evil spawn," Bella said gratefully, earning a chuckle from the room.. She dropped the shoes and carefully wedged her feet in, effectively completing the look.

"Have I told you how much I love that color on you?" Edward murmured into her ear as he turned them to Esme, who was holding a camera. Carlisle was standing behind her, grinning as he watched his son, his first companion, interact with his mate.

"Not in the last day and a half," Bella teased. She'd worn his favorite shirt - and one Alice, surprisingly approved of - in the midnight blue color just the other day. He had told her she looked stunning.

"Much too long."

"Oh, shut up already," Emmett complained loudly.

All eyes turned to him, and he shrunk back. "Well, I mean, whenever you're ready and shit," he mumbled, rubbing the back of his head as he retreated off to Rosalie who was looking stunning as ever in a blood red dress and towering black heels.

Slipping on her gown, Bella didn't feel so gorgeous anymore. It wasn't the ill-fitting gown, though, and it wasn't Rosalie. It was just everything. Nothing brought a teenage girl's self esteem down quicker than being in a house full of vampires who were all dolled up. Fantastic. Clearing her throat, she looked up and flashed a broad smile to the camera, leaning closer to Edward.

For a while, she went around the room, taking pictures with all the family members. Except, of course, Rosalie, and to Bella's disappointment, Jasper. Damn, she had really fucked up, hand't she? He'd never been anything but nice to her - with the exception of his sexual innuendo and the fact that he wanted to rip out her throat - and she'd gone and crushed him when he needed help. Fantastic.

. . .

Bella wanted to put a bullet in her brain. Literally. Sitting in the uncomfortable, plastic chair in the freezing cold while people jawed endlessly up onstage was not part of her idealistic high school graduation. The first speech by Angela had been inspirational and not cliched. It all went downhill from there. Cliches were being spouted off left and right, and Bella couldn't tell one speech from the other.

"Aaron Anders with high honors."

Bella perked. They'd finally gotten to calling out names. Finally. Anxiously, her leg began bouncing, and she looked about. She knew that she would never see these people again. Somehow, even through all the troubles with Edward leaving - and her subsequent zombie state - and being her awkward self, she had developed kinship with some of these people, and she was sad to see them go. Well, she was going. The majority of them - that she cared enough about to ask, at least - were staying in Forks, or at the very least, in Washington.

"Alice Cullen with highest honor. Edward Cullen with highest honor."

Nervously, Bella smoothed her hands over the slick silver of her gown. She got up with her row, taking deep, even breaths. This was nothing, really; she knew all of these people. All of them had known her since she was a little thing. This shouldn't be freaking her out. But it was. Taking a deep, even breath, Bella straightened, nerves dancing in her stomach.

"Bella Swan with highest honor."

Quickly, Bella made her way up the stairs, then across the makeshift stage, gripping the principal's hand and shaking it firmly before turning with him and smiling at the camera. Her eyes, though, didn't stay on the camera. A crop of wavy blonde hair caught her eye, and pulled her attention. Jasper was huddling back against the main doors to the gym, smiling proudly at her. She realized that she had been standing there too long a heartbeat too late.

She quickly made her way off stage, back to her seat, a deep red blush - rivaling the color of the boys' gowns - on her cheeks. The rest of the ceremony went by thankfully without too much trouble. And then the caps went up. Bella tossed hers up a moment too late, but she hoped that it went unnoticed.

A soft gasp came from her lips as Edward and Alice suddenly appeared in front of her. Edward leaned down and picked up her discarded cap, folding it carefully flat, offering out a hand for his tassel. A small smile tugged at Bella's lips and she handed it to him, watching him curiously as he reattached it, then handed it to Alice who had both hers and Edward's under her arm. Arching a brow, Bella looked between them.

Before she had a chance to ask, Edward slid his arm around her waist, tugging her close as they headed out of the gym. "We keep all our graduation caps. We're starting your collection with this one. That's a huge thing. None of us have any kind of memorabilia from our human high school graduation. This one will always be the most special." With a smile, he kissed her forehead, pulling her closer.

"Oh," Bella said simply, smiling lightly. At least he was hinting that she was indeed going to be going to high school a few more times. Haha! Bella wins.

"Come on, Alice says that she has to make you over again for the party."

Bella looked up to him, mortified. "Party?" she repeated flatly, turning slowly to look up to him.

Edward flashed her a grin and kissed her cheek before loping off after the rest of his family. Alice came up and took his place, looping their arms softly, grinning toothily up at Bella.

"Yes, party. The whole school's invited."

Bella blanched. God, she hated parties. Loathed them. And now the whole school was invited? Dear God. Sighing resignedly, Bella nodded, letting the pint-sized vampire lead her out of the gym, all the while, her deep brown eyes searching for the vampire that had been at the back of the gym while she was receiving her diploma. A tiny bit of hope sparked in her stomach, blooming unabashedly. Maybe she hadn't offended him too much. Maybe he wasn't mad. Maybe he didn't think that she was a raging bitch. God, she hoped so. Biting her lip, excitement bubbled in her stomach.

Hopefully, he would be at the party tonight, and she could apologize. It seemed much less intimidating, now, that she had seen him smiling and happy, not dark and growling or sexual. God, she hoped all would be well with them; she really did want to help Jasper. It was just so difficult. She never knew what to believe and what not to. Pushing her thoughts aside, she let herself relax into the smooth leather of Alice's Porche, knowing that any kind of rest or relaxation that she got now would be all she would be getting for the entire day, maybe two, depending.

x x x

Oddly-colored lights flashed across the cool tones of the Cullen house. Bella's head throbbed along with the heavy beat of the song that played loudly through the speakers. Only few people around her danced; Bella had found a small niche where the music was not too loud, the lights not too seizure-inducing, not too many people dancing around her. Still, though, she was still uncomfortable, a light sheen of sweat developing across her skin. She had to get out of there. Carefully, she weaved through the people, giving quiet greetings and short smalltalk, trying her best to get fully out of the house.

Finally, she found solace in the backyard. Slowly, she took in a deep breath, tipping her head up to the sky. Her fingers played nervously with the edges of her dress. Although her dress for graduation had not been revealing, this new dress certainly was. Short with a dipping neckline, it was a lovely emerald green color, a similar tone to the blue dress from earlier. The only positive, though, was that it was lightweight and allowed her to cool quickly. WIth the gently blowing, cool wind, her skin dried, and her lungs took in fresh air. Finally.

"I love that color on you, darlin'," came a lazy southern drawl from behind her.

A shocked gasp pulled through Bella's lips as her eyes snapped open and she whipped toward the voice. Unable to help herself, a broad smile broke across her face. "Jasper!" she exclaimed. He was there. Good. Not inside - not that she blamed him - but there all the same.

Jasper grinned in turn, taking a few lazy moments to come to stand by her. "Most people prefer blue on you and people with that strawberries-and-cream skin that you've got.-" A small blush rose to Bella's cheeks. "but I just love that color on you. It brings out the green in your eyes."

Arching a brow, Bella turned her eyes up to him. He was just full of surprises. He wasn't throwing sexual references to her, growling or purring, taunting her, or being a complete dick. She was going to get whiplash if he continued this.

"My eyes aren't green, Jasper," Bella countered, looking up at him under her furrowed eyebrows.

"I know that, Bella." Jasper rolled his eyes, glancing down at her with a small smile. Maybe she wasn't as mad as he thought she was. He was nearly giddy with this realization. She wasn't yelling or bitching at him. Maybe all was well. 'But you have flecks of green. They're dark and hardly there, but it makes your eyes look absolutely gorgeous."

Bella's blush darkened slightly, and she pushed a lock of hair behind her ears, casting her eyes to the ground. "Thank you," she said, wiggling her towering heel into the mud. Alice would kill her for that, but she really had no problems with that.

Glancing down at her, Jasper smiled slyly before grimacing, just noticing the music from inside. It was worthy of making his ears bleed. Pulling out his iPod, he scrolled through his songs, trying to find one loud enough to overpower the music from inside. CSN?…Nah. Hall and Oates? Where the fuck did that one come from?

Shyly, he looked at the human next to him out of the corner of his eye. "Are you still mad at me."

A small laugh bubbled from Bella's lips at his question, and she glanced back up at him. "No," she said, shaking her head. "I wasn't mad at you, per se." She lowered her voice so that he could just hear her; it was almost as though she was mouthing the words. "Mostly Edward."

Jasper nodded in understanding. He knew well of the sexual frustration between Edward and Bella. It practically killed him. His beast - which he had caged up - snarled at the thought of Bella and Edward together. It wasn't a snarl of sexual nature, more of possession. For a moment, Jasper was taken aback. Why would he feel possessive of Bella? What the hell? His beast gave a dark chuckle, curling back up in his cage, letting Jasper stir over that for a while. His job had been done; he didn't even need to be let out to fuck with Jasper's mind. Clearing his throat - unnecessarily - he nodded again.

"I"m sorry that I fucked that up for you guys."

"We're fine," she said tightly.

Looking at her sideways, Jasper arched his brows. "Lies," he accused, the small sour taint to her emotional pallet giving her away.

"Cheater," she grumbled.

"Empath," he countered.

"Cheating all the same."

"You're just a sour puss."

"Was that supposed to be sexual?"

"Do you want it to be?"

Bella looked at him with a thoughtful expression, studying him. His eyes were clear, unclouded, and a bright gold color. Jasper was still in control, not his beast. She was not sure whether or not this was good. It meant that it was caged, and she was having a conversation with the real Jasper, but on the same note, it meant that his beast was planning an escape again, that he was a ticking time bomb again.

"Shut up," she grumbled, nudging his hip with her own.

"Ah ha!" Jasper exclaimed victoriously, settling finally on Hitch a Ride by Boston. Sliding the right bud into his ear, he offered her the left with a smile.

Hesitantly, Bella took it from him and slid it into her ear. Jasper watched her curiously, intently. It took her human brain a moment to process the sound, but as soon as it did, Bella lit up, a broad grin breaking across her face.

"You like Boston?" Jasper asked, incredulous. Or maybe he was impressed. Either way. He could not believe that Bella knew Boston, let alone liked them, which she obviously did by the grin on her face and she brightness in her eyes.

"God, who doesn't?" Bella bobbed her head lightly with the song, glancing to him with an arched brow.

"Edward. People your age."

"Edward doesn't like anything past the fifties. I don't know - or care - why. I was honestly curious, and we've tried to talk about it, but he always gets irritated and starts patronizing me, telling me that I'm young and I haven't 'fully developed my brain.'" Her brows puckered softly, and a little growl came from her.

Chuckling, Jasper rolled his eyes. Stupid kid really knew how to turn a girl off. Before he could get too far on that thought path, he responded to her, "And he was turned at seventeen."

"One year difference, but still." Bella knew she was whining, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Edward was just so….infuriating sometimes. She just wanted to scream when she was around him. Always hovering, always…there.

"Cheer up, buttercup," Jasper coaxed, nudging her hip with his. Bella glanced up at him, and Jasper was elated with his reward of a smile.

"Are you going to pick a nickname for me anytime soon?"

Jasper gave her a dramatic look. "Darlin', you can't just ask me to choose." He groaned dramatically, tossing his head back, effectively ripping the earbud from Bella's ear.

"Heeeeey," she complained.

Chuckling his apology, Jasper gently tucked it into her ear. "There you are, sweets."

Bella shook her head, making a face. "My grandpa called me sweets."

Grimacing, Jasper nodded. "Right, right. Sorry, angel."

A small smile tugged at Bella's lips. She couldn't wait to hear all of his endearments. They just flowed off his tongue so easily. Unlike Edward's endearment of "love", Jasper's were not at all patronizing or forced. They were natural and affectionate, and Bella loved it.

"Hey, kitten?"

Glancing up, Bella offered a smile and an arch of her brows, a silent indicator for him to go on.

"We're good? Friends?"

"Yeah, Jasper. We're good. Friends." A smile tugged at Bella's lips and she turned her eyes back to the full moon. Absolutely gorgeous. Mind you, not as stunning as the harvest moon - which were her favorite - but pretty all the same.

A broad smile broke across Jasper's face, and he hesitantly offered out a hand to her. That's what friends did, right? "You know," he said, elated that her hand easily slid into his. God, her hand was so warm, so soft. He just wanted to cuddle her. Wait, what? HIs beast snickered in his cage, and Jasper internally growled at him. The beast grumbled and licked its lips, curling back into the cage as it cleaned itself, just biding its time. "You're my first friend."

Bella's eyes flickered up to him, surprise coloring her tone and face. "But Emmett and Rosalie…"

"More family."

"So, I'm your first friend?"

"Yes ma'am."

"I like that."

Jasper grinned down at her, studying her profile as she looked up at the moon, the stars, taking it all in. "Me too," he agreed.

They lapsed into an easy silence, still holding hands, watching the stars twinkle in the sky, both smiling as the song transitioned into The Joker by the Steve Miller Band, both starting to sway slightly, humming along with the song.

Inside Jasper, the beast snickered. This was just too damn easy. Opening its jowls, it yawned largely and settled back for a sleep. It would need its energy when it came back out again. It had big plans, huge plans, and they would not be thwarted.


A/N: Hi, everyone. I'm so sorry that it's been a month. Finals were pretty brutal, and as soon as I got out of school, I went on vacation. I'm back, though, and free for the summer, so you'll be getting updates much quicker and more frequently.

I've been asked about my story, Savin' Me, if I was going to continue it, and I'm still pondering that. I can't really remember where I was going with it. I'll have to hunt through my documents, and maybe I'll start it up again.

I've recently deleted, too, my story, Head Games. I don't know if any of you are interested in me starting that up again.

Either tell me in a reply or shoot me a PM. That would literally make my day. Thank you all so much.

xx

Claire