New York Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Not Mine

A/N – JJ tries to take Rossi's advice. Hotch continues to be stupid until he gets advice from an unlikely source…

Eleven days later….

JJ never got the opportunity to go in and speak to Hotch like Rossi suggested because they had been called to Florida to assist on a serial rapist case. She behaved professionally the entire trip. She performed the duties requested of her and treated Hotch with the respect he had earned as the leader of their team but she didn't make any overtures to repair their friendship.

The team resolved the case late Wednesday and returned to the DC metropolitan area on Thursday evening. JJ finally decided she'd had enough. She couldn't take it any longer. She missed Jack horribly. She hadn't seen him in almost three weeks. So the next morning she arrived at work early. She still wasn't sure that she'd be able to apologize but she wanted to see Jack and she was willing to do whatever was necessary to make amends with his asshat of a father to make it happen.

The knock on his office door startled him. He wasn't used to anyone being in the office with him so early. His heart gave a hard knock when he realized who it was at his door. "JJ?"

The blonde hovered at the opening. "Do you have a minute?" She asked softly.

"Sure. Absolutely." He was pleased to see her. He'd wanted to approach her several times but he just wasn't sure how to. The fact that she was making the effort to speak to him pleased him beyond belief. He pushed the files he was perusing forward on his desk. "What can I do for you, JJ?" He gestured for her to take a seat.

JJ wrung her hands together. "Listen, Aar…Hotch I know that I said some pretty harsh things."

"You did." He agreed; he was willing to let that go.

"Yeah, I did." She looked at him and felt her resolve weaken, she'd come with the intent of working out their issues. "I, uh, I…" She closed her eyes and sighed. "Well, darn it, I still think them. But I'm sorry that I said them and they affected our friendship."

"You are the one that decided you no longer want to be my friend." He reminded her stiffly, needing to point out it was she that had decided to put some space between them. He hadn't stayed away from her.

JJ let out a loud huff as she sat in the seat in front of his desk. "Hotch, I don't know how to get over this. I can't wrap my brain around the fact that you are just going to pick up and move and take Jack away from me."

He couldn't help the little smile that formed over her indignation. "JJ, Jack is my son it stands to reason that I would want him to move with me."

"But." She frowned and tried to regroup. "I need to see Jack. We need to see Jack. He's been so integrated in our lives that we're going through withdrawal." She bit her bottom lip. "Henry misses him almost as much as I do."

Hotch could see she was struggling not to cry. "JJ I'm not keeping Jack from you. You've kept him at arms-length yourself because you didn't want to associate with me." He watched as the realization of what she'd done crossed her face.

A tear ran down her cheek unheeded. "I can't pretend to be happy for you. I thought I could. I thought I could be okay with it but I can't act like your moving is a good idea and be supportive of it. All your moving means to me is you're removing Jack from my life." A little sob of pain escaped. "You have to know how much both Henry and I love him. And you." She admitted softly. "I considered you one of my best friends but I'm so mad at you right now that it hurts to look at you." She completely failed to do what Rossi had asked.

He wasn't sure what to make of her admission. "Well it hurts me that you can't support me. That you aren't happy for me." He said gruffly. Though, if he were honest he'd admit that he was already having serious doubt about his decision.

She smiled softly at him while she wiped a tear from her cheek. "I wish I could be happy for you. I really wish that I thought this was going to be an amazing move for you and that you would flourish both personally and professionally but the truth is I don't. You'll be okay professionally but you won't find Missing Persons as satisfying as you do the BAU." She paused and faced him fully. "And your relationship with Beth will deteriorate as soon as the two of you really spend any time together."

Even though he'd come to some of the same conclusions himself it angered him slightly that she nailed it so completely. "What exactly are you basing that supposition on?"

JJ shrugged. "What exactly do you have in common other than sex? Don't get me wrong, sex is great but it's not enough to build a relationship on. If Beth would have remained in the area your relationship would have run out of steam and this wouldn't be happening. She doesn't really know you Aaron." Not like JJ did.

Her analogy infuriated him. "Why? Is that what happened with you and Will?" The words were out of his mouth as soon as the thought entered his mind.

JJ stood abruptly, hurt etched on her face. The end of her relationship with Will had come after a lot of talk and consideration. They both wanted to remain friends and knew that couldn't be accomplished if they remained married.

Hotch jumped up as well. "God, JJ, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that." He hadn't. He considered both Will and JJ friends and was envious that they remained friendly and respectful during the demise of their relationship. "I promise you, I was just lashing out at you. Not that that is any better."

JJ didn't meet his eyes as she walked to the door. "It's fine, it doesn't matter. Apparently we both say mean things. Can I please see Jack?"

He realized she wasn't going to be receptive to an apology so soon. So he granted her the one thing she asked. "Sure." He watched dejectedly as she left his office. He had been so pathetically hopeful when she poked her head in the door earlier.

Her words continued to eat at him all day. As did his comment. By noon he'd made a personal call to Will and apologized.

"You realize that I wasn't offended until you called me, right?" Will had been surprised both by the call and the admission.

Hotch sighed. "Yeah. It's just. I didn't mean it, she just pissed me off so bad I wanted to strike back at her."

"Hotch this is a little weird for me, why are you apologizing to me and not JJ?"

"She's back to not even looking at me." He mumbled.

Her ex sighed. "You know, you sound about as pathetic as JJ. Has it occurred to her that you miss her as much as she misses you?"

It had, he just didn't know what to do about it. "Yeah, but I don't know what to do about it."

"Maybe you should give it some thought. If you miss her as bad as you do when you work in the same office and see her daily what do you think is going to happen when you move to another city?" Will asked him curiously.

"Originally I thought that we'd still talk on the phone and see each other occasionally." He'd been optimistically naïve that his life would continue in much the same vein as it always had. He realized now that he'd made some very big tactical errors. Moving to New York had been the least of them.

"Really?" Will scoffed. "Do you honestly think that Beth is going to let that happen?"

"Why does everyone think Beth is so bad?" Hotch asked, seriously perplexed by why everyone thought she was evil.

"Honestly I only know what I hear from JJ and you're right, she is probably a little biased. But I can tell you as having been that other person in the relationship. She's going to want you to focus on the two of you, not your old friends."

He knew that Will was probably right in his assessment. "Are you saying you asked JJ to give us up?"

Will snorted. "Only about a dozen times until I finally realized that the BAU and being around all of you contributed greatly to JJ's happiness."

Going for broke Hotch asked, "Can I ask why you divorced?" He wondered frequently but had never had the nerve to ask JJ.

Will sighed heavily on the other end of the line. "I don't know, Hotch, we were stuck. We loved one another, but we weren't in love with one another. We want different things from life. We are great friends and great co-parents. And I hate to tell you this but JJ was right. The sex, when we had it, was great, but it really isn't enough to sustain a relationship."

"Huh."

Will let him absorb that for a minute. "Can I ask you something?"

Hotch sighed. "Sure."

"Have you ever been honest with yourself about how you feel about JJ?"

Hotch let out a long breath wondering if the man had a six sense that he often envisioned his ex-wife naked. "I'm not sure what you mean." He hedged.

Will laughed. "I thought so. You know, I'm not sure you should even be considering moving in with one woman when you have feelings for another. Unless you mistakenly thought that would help you get rid of them?"

Still avoiding answering the question he asked instead. "Let me guess, you think I'm making a mistake too?"

"Well, that's not what I said exactly, but yeah, I do." He paused then told him bluntly. "Moving in with Beth isn't going to change how you feel about JJ." When Hotch didn't say anything Will spoke up again. "Hotch? I think maybe you need to admit to yourself that you're in love with JJ. You have been for a long time. Probably as long as she's been in love with you."

Hotch wasn't sure how to respond to that. "You're a good guy Will. I am truly sorry it didn't work out for you and JJ."

Will chuckled again knowing he wasn't going to get anything out of him and let the subject drop. "Hotch, go and make up with JJ. Do it before it's too late." He advised.

The idea of it being too late spurred him into action. "Can I pick up Henry tonight?" Hotch asked abruptly. "So I can bring Jack over to see JJ?" He paused. "She told me that she really misses him."

"Sure, but you do realize you are seriously pathetic for using the kids to get back in her good graces?" Will scoffed.

Hotch sighed. "I just need them to get me through the door." Then he was prepared to grovel.

But before he could worry about that he had another phone call to make. Even knowing that this call would not be well received he was completely calm as he picked up the phone and dialed the familiar number.

Calling Will had probably been unorthodox but it was the smartest thing he'd done in a long while.

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JJ eyed him distastefully when she opened the door to her home but when Jack, then Henry, popped up she let out a squeal and fell to her knees. Both boys flew into her arms. Hotch couldn't help but smile as she kissed his son's entire face. All the while telling him how much she'd missed him and loved him.

"We were hoping that we could talk you in to having pizza with us." Hotch told her after they had collapsed in a tangle of happy limbs. "Or whatever you want for dinner." His eyes pleaded with her.

JJ was quick enough to recognize it for the olive branch it was. "Do you guys want pizza?" She asked the boys on her lap.

Hotch found himself watching JJ closely as the night progressed. From the way that she listened intently when either of the boys spoke to her. To the way that she would brush their hair from their eyes. He was surprised by the fact that his son would reach out and hold her hand unconsciously, or hug her randomly and she would light up at either gesture. He also noticed how Henry hung on every word that Jack said and Jack would do anything to make the younger boy laugh.

"Are you okay?" JJ asked after watching him watch them.

"What?" Her question had startled him.

"You look kind of sad, I asked if you were okay." She repeated.

He looked at her as if he were just realizing that she was there. "Um, yeah, I am. JJ, can I talk to you in the kitchen for a minute?" They were sitting in the family room watching the boys. He watched as she struggled with a response.

"I don't want to fight with you." She said softly, looking at the boys.

"JJ I don't want to fight either. Please, just two minutes." He pleaded. He didn't know if two minutes would be enough time to say everything he needed to say to her but it was a start.

She stood up from the couch. "Hey boys, I'm going to go into the kitchen with Hotch for a minute. I'll be right back, okay?" She smiled as they acknowledged they heard her then turned and walked into the room with Hotch following her closely. She turned around to face him.

"JJ, I am so sorry. I hate fighting with you." He began. "I hate that you're mad at me. I hate that I was an ass." Because only an asshole would even think about separating the family he just observed.

"No." She shook her head. "I'm sorry, if moving to New York is what you want to make you happy than I'll support that." She gave a little sob, heartbroken by the prospect. "But you have to promise me that you won't keep Jack from me. As long as he wants to see me you have to promise you'll let him."

His eyes were misting as she became emotional. "JJ.."

"I realized today that I was being selfish, I was only thinking of myself and how I felt about you moving when I should have been there for you; you're my friend. I love you. I do want you to be happy."

His breath caught at her easy admission and he took a step closer to where she stood, wedged in the corner of the countertops. "JJ.."

She was crying by this point. "I'm never going to be happy about the fact that you're leaving because I'm going to miss you so much that I can't stand even thinking about it. But you can't help that you don't feel the same way I do. I'm sorry. I think I wanted to punish you for the fact that you don't. I'm sorry that I wasted so much of the time you have left here fighting with you and being angry."

"JJ.." He moved so he was standing directly in front of her.

She blinked up at him through her tears. "I'm so sorry."

He was beyond mere words, he stepped into her space effectively caging her and bent down and captured her mouth hungrily. Her hands slapped at his chest before her fingers curled into his shirt and gathered him to her.

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